


The Hazards of Love

by TheRavingRedhead, toonytrudy



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, F/M, Fauns & Satyrs, Fawnlock, Friends to Lovers, Interspecies, M/M, Minor Character Death, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Racism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-05
Updated: 2016-04-23
Packaged: 2017-12-28 11:50:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 23
Words: 119,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/991694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRavingRedhead/pseuds/TheRavingRedhead, https://archiveofourown.org/users/toonytrudy/pseuds/toonytrudy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As a prince of his kind, Fawnlock was free to roam the forest as he wished. Things became more difficult, however, when he decided to befriend a creature that simply did not belong in the forest.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [bennyslegs](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bennyslegs/gifts).



> When my roleplay partner Sonja and I first took on this project, we decided that we wanted to take inspiration from Paula’s material; but we also wanted to add more world-building elements. Things like language, culture, species and various things like that to keep things smoothed over and potentially give us a wider scale of adventure and fantasy. (I'd like to note now that this doesn't take place in any particular place in the UK. So don't try to map things out. You'll only hurt your brain.)
> 
> The problem with writing a collaborative roleplay into fanfiction form is the considerable amount of time it takes. We started this fic in November of 2012 and didn't properly finish it together February 2013. It's only just come out now because I had to go through and edit a few things. So there might be a lot of conflicting ideas/correlated ideas by the time we fully publish this. Thus, we would like to ask you to please take our ideas in stride.
> 
> I’d like to note that we did not consult or collaborate on any portion of this fic with Paula. Still, we would like to give complete credit towards her for the idea of Fawnlock. Thank you, and happy reading!

There was never a better place for Fawnlock to be then in the forest. Though it was common for his kind to remain in a closely-knit pack; Fawnlock never had the desire to be with them. None of them truly understood him, and nothing there had ever satisfied his overwhelming curiosity. He distinctly recalled his elder brother telling him that it would be the death of him. Though, Fawnlock didn’t believe him in the slightest. He was, after all, a forest spirit. 

Forest spirits take on many forms. Fawnlock’s was called Harina, or deer spirit. They stood tall with short brown fur, darker markings, short tails and wavy hair. Harina were considered guardians over the northern mountains. It was their duty to create and protect life in the forest. But because Fawnlock had driven himself away from his kind, he found himself drawn further south.

Harina defined the parts of their forest based upon sight and smell. So when a new smell came riding on the summer breeze, Fawnlock was naturally curious. It was faint, but it was distinctly sweet and inviting. Fawnlock had spent ages in this ancient forest, so he was usually able to tell if something had changed.

Granted, he hadn't been able to wander around the south part of the forest often, but he knew something was different. It didn't smell like a new tree, or any kind of flower. Fawnlock had made sure to catalogue those. This new smell was nothing like he had ever sensed before.   
  
He followed the scent with caution and determination. It was miles off from where Fawnlock was presently, but he didn't let that stop him. There was something new in his forest, and he wanted to know exactly what it was.  
  
\--  
  
It wasn't giving into peer pressure. Not really, at least. Everyone had told him that his behaviour wasn't accepted, especially with his tendency to draw a weapon at almost every turn. Some told him to take a break and try to find something relaxing to do at home, like taking up fly-knotting or something. Others had simply suggested he leave the civilisation that so obviously made him anxious.   
  
So, by sheer (it seemed at the time) stupidity, John Watson had decided to combine the two. He had heard of others doing this, finding a secluded cottage in the middle of the woods and settling down there, so he decided to do just that. Perhaps a bit of solitude would calm his nerves and stop him from being so tense all the time. That, and getting away from the noises of the city would do wonders for his nightmares. At least, that's what he hoped.   
  
It was easy enough in theory, anyway. Simple gardening as a way of having something to do, perhaps a bit of reading and writing, and those exercises everyone kept telling him to do to deal with his stress. All in all, it made perfect sense. Just get away from everything for a while; at least until he felt like he was ready to face civilian life again.  
  
When mid-day came, Mrs Hudson appeared at the cottage. As the landowner, she felt it was only right to check in on John every once in a while. The old lady rapped on the door, and patiently waited for John to answer.  
  
John perked when he heard the knock, and had to remind himself not to tense, as this couldn't be anything drastic or life threatening. He brought out his cane and steadily limped towards the door, annoyed at how frail he was physically. Now all he had to do was wait for the arthritis to sink in. Regardless, he approached the door and (after a short pause in which he mentally scolded himself for subconsciously reaching for an absent gun) opened it. "Hullo?"  
  
"Hello deary!" Mrs Hudson chirped, "Just thought I'd pop by and see how you were doing. Would you mind if I came in?" She asked with a smile.  
  
"Not at all, come right in," John replied as he stood aside for Mrs Hudson to enter the cottage. He then closed the door and went towards his stove. "Can I get you anything? Tea, coffee?"  
  
"Some tea would be lovely,” Mrs Hudson replied as she moved to the table to sit down. “If it's not too much trouble." She added while casting a small glance at John’s leg.  
  
John smiled as he poured a decent amount of water into his kettle and then turned it on. "It's really not. I was just about to have a cuppa myself," he said as he reached for two mugs and the tea bags.  
  
"So tell me, how do you like living here so far?" Mrs Hudson asked.  
  
"It's very nice, actually, far more than I expected," John replied. "So far, anyway. Still tend to get panic attacks every now and then, but I'm getting better at telling myself it's all over nothing," he added with a small chuckle.  
  
"Well I'm glad you're enjoying yourself. This cottage has been in my family for generations. I'm glad someone is making some use of it." Mrs Hudson said.  
  
"It's pretty isolated, though, isn't it?" John commented. "Not that it's a bad thing, because God knows I need that, but for anyone else, it could be considered a bit... spooky, couldn't it?"  
  
Mrs Hudson giggled a little. "Oh I wouldn't worry much about it, dear. The forest spirits protect this part of the forest. And as long as you don't bother them, they won't bother you." She said in a matter-of-fact tone.  
  
"Forest spirits? You mean like in the fairy tales?" John asked, and then let out another soft chuckle. "Oh come now, we both know they're just stories. And even if they were real, I probably would have warded them off by now."  
  
"On the contrary, I think they would try to help you; if you asked for their help, that is. And I know you might think it's silly of me, but I believe in them." Mrs Hudson told John.  
  
Just as she finished speaking, the kettle boiled, so John busied himself with preparing their tea. He brought Mrs Hudson hers before going back for his. He wasn't going to deny it; it _was_ rather silly to believe in such things as forest spirits. Especially since they were just stories and legends people would tell to their kids. 

"Why is that, then?" John asked as he made his way towards the table, stiffly sitting down. "Any specific reason, or did you just never grow out of the phase?"  
  
Mrs Hudson didn't even flinch at the comment. She simply gave John a smile and spoke, "I believe, because I've seen them myself." The old woman explained as she reached for her tea.  
  
John raised an eyebrow, unsure of what to think. Surely Mrs Hudson wasn't old enough to be completely senile, was she? "Have you, now? And what did they think? Or do? Or whatever it is they show their observers?"  
  
"Well, truth be told, I've only seen one in my life time. He was a timid creature, but I would track him as best as I could. I was able to see him create some of the plants and the trees. It's their duty to create and protect life in the forest." Mrs Hudson explained.  
  
"'He'? I always assumed they were pretty much genderless," John commented, deciding to play along, since Mrs Hudson seemed to be entirely sincere about all of this. Despite all of it being impossible, of course. "So... you just followed him around all the time? Watching him do his, uh... magic?"  
  
"Oh goodness no, not all the time. The spirits are very elusive. They can only be seen when they want to be seen. But when I did, I would watch him." Mrs Hudson explained. "And trust me, he was very much a he." She said with a slight smile.  
  
John cleared his throat, not wanting any further elaboration on that. "Fair enough," he said instead before taking an awkward sip of his tea. "What did he do? And why d'you think he wanted you to see him?" he then asked to try and avert the previous subject further.  
  
"Well, like I said, the cottage has been in our family for generations. My family would come up twice every year, at the least, and we would stay here. My guess is that the spirit was used to our presence, so he let down his guard. He saw that I had no ill intentions, so he grew comfortable around me." Mrs Hudson expressed before taking a sip of her tea.  
  
"Huh. Interesting," John said just to fill in the silence while the woman drank. "So when you say he lowered his guard, do you mean he just stopped caring you were here, or did something happen?"  
  
"I suppose he didn’t mind. When we first came to the forest, we were an intrusion. When he grew accustomed to us being here, we were simply a new part of his forest. I like to believe he was watching over us, just like the plants and animals he created and watched over." Mrs. Hudson told him with a smile.  
  
John just took a sip of his tea, having no idea how to respond to that right away. Mrs Hudson genuinely believed that forest spirits had made the trees, as opposed to the logical conclusion; seeds and soil. He decided not to point it out, as she was so happy talking about this like they were discussing the weather. "Is he still here?" he then asked.  
  
The happy smile turned into a sad one. "Well, I believe that the spirits never really leave the forests. But perhaps he's left this part, yes." Mrs Hudson said. "My father was a hunter, you see, he liked to do it for sport and our survival. Because of that, the spirit never liked my father much."  
  
"Oh..." John replied with a small expression of realisation. "Your dad didn't hunt _him_ , did he? That you know of?"  
  
By the time the question had been asked, Mrs Hudson's smile had completely vanished. "He definitely tried. We had all seen him a few times. As the spirit became more comfortable with us, my father grew anxious. He never understood the spirit's importance. Luckily, my father never succeeded. But he managed to drive him away. For years, the soils became infertile, and we were forced to move."  
  
At that, John had to take a moment to think. "Hang on. If that's the case, then how come he's allowing me to stay here? And grow my vegetables?" he asked, and only after he finished speaking did he realise how silly he sounded. Was he really buying into all this forest spirit nonsense?

"The spirits have a way of seeing through you. So perhaps he sees something good in you, and has decided you're suitable enough to stay." Mrs Hudson said.  
  
"Or doesn't want to bother with me," John said with a small shrug. "Probably still furious about the hunting thing and now doesn't want to go near this place."  
  
"Maybe." Mrs Hudson said just before taking another drink of her tea. There was a slight pause until she removed the cup from her lips so she could smile at John. "Still, I would keep a sharp eye out. They say it's a blessing to see a forest spirit in person."  
  
John chuckled. "I'll be sure to remember that if I ever see one," he said, though he knew it would never happen. "And maybe I'll try not to be too threatening."  
  
Mrs Hudson simply smiled; completely unaware of exactly how John could be threatening. He had told her that he had been in the war, but all she saw was a kind face. "I've found the best way to gain their trust is through their stomachs. They may be spirits, but even they have to eat."  
  
"Well, they are part animals, aren't they?" John offered, glad to see that Mrs Hudson was smiling properly again. "Maybe their curiosity will get to them and they'll start invading my garden."  
  
"Oh dear," Mrs Hudson chuckled lightly. "You wouldn't want that. If you give them an offering, they'll be sure to leave your garden alone with every harvest." She told him.  
  
"I'll keep that in mind," John said with a smile. "Speaking of which, I should probably start tending to it before it gets too dark."  
  
"Oh yes, of course." Mrs Hudson said before she stood to her feet. "Thank you for the lovely tea. And I know it's not very convenient for you, but feel free to drop into town at any time."  
  
John nodded. "I might. Even if it's just to visit the land owner," he said as he stood up as well. He slowly walked Mrs Hudson to the door, a bit embarrassed that he, the younger of the two, was the one brandishing a cane and limping like a man thirty years older than he was. "Thanks for dropping by. Hope I'm not being too rude, shoving you out like this."  
  
"Not at all, dear. I understand your need for some peace and quiet. I used to find myself in the garden as well when things would get heated between my husband and I." Mrs Hudson told John, "I've only ever felt at home when I was surrounded by nature. It will do you a lot of good to be out here. I guarantee it." She said right as she was out the door.  
  
"I don't doubt that in the slightest," John said as he offered the woman his fondest smile. "I'll be seeing you."  
  
Mrs Hudson turned and smiled back at John. "Good bye, deary." And with that she left John's steps.   
  
\--  
  
When the sweet scent had become stronger, Fawnlock became more cautious. He scanned the trees, finding that a few had been marked long ago. They were Moosecroft's warnings. And though Fawnlock hardly paid any mind to his brother, he still had a sense of apprehensiveness. Especially considering that the warnings were grave. Despite this, Fawnlock continued to follow the scent, hoping to find whatever it was that was leaving the scent behind.  
  
\--  
  
"God dammit..." John sighed as he came out to his garden one day. That was the third time this month that his cabbages had been all but ravaged by some kind of woodland creature. He suspected squirrels.

With a bit of difficulty, he crouched down to have a look and see if anything could be repaired. Only a fair few of the cabbages could potentially keep growing. John annoyingly ran a hand down his face in disappointment.

If this continued on, he would have to set up traps. And that was something he had not wanted to resort to, given his history.  
  
\--  
  
There was no mistaking it; the scent was strongest around a large upper-ground burrow of some sort. Fawnlock knew it was considered home to a creature, but it was unlike anything he had ever seen before. All he knew was that it didn't seem to be natural. During the moonlight he had investigated it, only for it to raise further questions.   
  
Fawnlock remembered his elder brother recalling something similar from the times before he had been injured. But he had dismissed it. The only thing he ever wanted to hear from his elder were the details of the creatures they called Inukom.   
  
This particular one kept itself hidden during the moonlight, and a majority of the daylight. There was nothing of Fawnlock's interest in the soil so far, which annoyed Fawnlock. He had heard from many other elders that the inukom were supposed to give them offerings. Especially considering he was royalty. But Fawnlock had yet to find a single offering, so he continued to overturn some of the plants every time they were fully grown.  
  
\--  
Despite not wanting to, John had resorted to having a visit to town, simply because his crops (if he could even call them that) continued getting ripped up and torn apart. He found himself needing more seeds, which annoyed him. This whole thing was doing nothing to calm his nerves, especially since it kept getting worse with each night. Whatever was picking at his garden must have alerted its pack. 

He settled with the basic seeds like the ones he had already planted, but also decided to take some chances this time. If he could properly protect his garden, maybe he would be able to grow something new or exotic. He decided on a few potatoes and, of all things, sugar beet seeds. And with much reluctance, he also bought a couple of traps to hide in the garden, just in case he could catch one of the creatures in the act. If only to see just what the hell was doing it.   
  
Once he returned to his cottage, he planted the new seeds and positioned the dreaded traps. If all went well, perhaps he wouldn't have to keep going into town for new supplies. The more he could avoid that, the better.  
  
\--  
  
From afar, Fawnlock was able to observe the comings and goings of the lone inukom. It seemed strange to Fawnlock that the creature would be alone. But perhaps that's where he found the inukom to be relatable. Fawnlock realised he should have been angry at this inukom, but he was simply too fascinated. He grew more curious with each rising sun, but he had yet gained the courage to reveal himself. Instead, Fawnlock watched daily as the inukom tended to its plants. It made him slightly amused to see this inukom try to become some form of a forest spirit. But he wasn't complaining when the newest of the crops began to grow.   
  
One day, Fawnlock was awoken from his slumber as soon as the scent had reached him. It was even more pleasant than the natural aroma coming from the inukom and its burrow. The sun was only beginning to wake when Fawnlock stood to follow the scent. He hesitated on the outskirts of the plain, worried that the inukom would wake up as soon as he stepped onto it. Evidently, Fawnlock's stomach spoke louder than his fear; and so he walked across the inukom's territory.   
  
As Fawnlock drew closer, the scent was overpowering. He didn't hesitate to dig up the plants. After taking a few of the preferred plants, Fawnlock decided to eat his offering elsewhere; should the inukom wake up. So he took his rightful plants and walked back to the edge of the forest.

Only, before he could sneak away Fawnlock felt as if the world had been pulled from underneath his feet. He had lost a hold on his offering, and found himself dangling from a nearby tree. Fawnlock tried to jerk out of it, but he couldn't move much. He felt so panicked he gave out a cry. He reached for the ground, but nothing could help. Fawnlock knew he was stuck.  
  
If there was one thing that John absolutely did not want to wake up to ever again, it was the sound of someone screaming. He was an extremely light sleeper because of the war, and so anything could set him off. He jerked awake the moment he heard the sound from outside, and sat up sharply in his bed. He tried to calm himself down, but his brain wouldn't stop picturing the worst kind of things he would see outside. He got out of bed, shaking slightly, and mentally prepared himself for what he would see.   
  
He limped up to his window (noting that his leg hurt more than usual), and cautiously took a peek. Whatever had screamed was still in his garden, but John was surprised to see that it wasn't on the ground or coming up to the cottage.

Instead, it had gotten caught in his trap. He sighed heavily when he saw that, but felt slight panic arise when he saw just how big the damn thing was. Would it be dangerous? Should he leave it there to die? What?   
  
In the end, curiosity won over. Despite his terror, he wanted to see what the thing was. He took out his small handgun and a knife just to be safe, and then tentatively stepped outside. It was damp out as usual, but John paid it no mind.

He took slow steps towards the trap, where he could see the creature continue to struggle and cry. He approached it, breathing nervously, and then froze in his tracks when he got a better view of what it was. He gaped, his mouth dropping open, his eyes open wide. "Bloody hell..." was all he managed.  
  
Fawnlock hadn't even registered the inukom's presence until it had spoken. The sound caused Fawnlock to jolt a little, and a stronger rush of panic sweep over him. He tried twisting around to break himself free of the trap, but the hold was too strong. Fawnlock didn't know what else to do. He was exposed and at the mercy of this lone inukom.  
  
John still didn't move, and continued to stare at the creature. It was unlike anything he had ever seen. He didn't even know how he would describe it. Perhaps it was some sort of humanised deer? But with fur like a feline? He really had no clue.

All he knew was that he was completely mesmerised by it, despite his fright. After a few moments, he noticed that the creature seemed just as scared as he was, and he felt a small sting of guilt when he remembered he was the one who put the thing is this situation.   
  
He took a slow step forward, not wanting to startle the creature, and tried to pull himself together, if only for the creature's sake. "Hey, it's okay," he said as softly as he dared, and swallowed. "I'm going to help you down."  
  
As the inukom drew closer, Fawnlock's eyes grew wider. The pounding in his chest grew more rapid, and he tried to jerk himself away. He understood nothing of what the inukom was telling him, and he wasn't sure he wanted to. Fawnlock couldn't focus hard enough to read the inukom's intensions. " _Inukom stay away!_ "  
  
John froze again. Holy hell, it could speak. Or something. Either way, whatever had just come out of its mouth was not a growl or a snarl or anything like that. And it seemed so frightened that John almost didn't want to go any closer, especially not if he had to use his knife to cut down the rope. But he would have to, because otherwise he would be stuck with a deer-hybrid-thing in a tree for the rest of his days, and that wouldn't work.

So he slowly brought up his knife, trying desperately not to look like he was going to attack it. "It's okay," he repeated. "I'm here to help you."  
  
Fawnlock stopped his thrashing to observe the weapon in the inukom's hand. Though he was mostly upside down, Fawnlock tried his best to read the inukom's emotions. He felt guilt, and smelled fear lingering with determination. Fawnlock's breathing steadied when he began to see that the inukom was trying to help. He remained silent and hyper-observant as the inukom moved towards him again.  
  
John continued taking slow, tentative steps, even though the creature wasn't thrashing about anymore. The closer he got, the more he was aware of his heavy and loud heartbeat. Once he was close enough, he brought the knife to the rope, and hesitated. 

How would he do this? If he just cut the rope, the creature would fall to the ground and be stuck with a piece of rope tied to its foot. But if he cut the knot, the creature would fall anyway. That meant two things: one, John would have to use both hands, meaning he would have to discard his cane for a few moments. Two, he would have to get permission to touch the creature in order to hold it steady.  
  
With a nervous intake of breath, John stiffly bent down to let his cane drop to the ground, and used his now free hand to reach for the creature. He wasn't sure if it would respond to that like a cat or a horse, and that he couldn't look it in the eyes, but decided not to take any chances. He looked away, but still kept reaching for it.  
  
It was strange to Fawnlock that the inukom wasn't looking at him. It made observing much harder. However, now that Fawnlock was so close, he was able to smell the sweet scent emanating from the inukom. It was rich and pleasant to him, because he could smell all of the foreign soils the inukom had been on.

Fawnlock closed his eyes momentarily, just to process the marvelous scent. His indulgence didn't last long as he felt a firm pressure on his lower leg. Fawnlock's eyes flew open and he jerked a little when he noticed the inukom was touching him. " _I- Inukom do not touch!_ " He exclaimed.  
  
The twitch and new cry almost made John jerk his hand away, but he kept still. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I know it's not good, but I have to," he told the creature, even though he was pretty sure that it couldn't understand him.

He inched closer to it, preparing to grab it once it fell when he had cut the rope. "It'll be over soon, and you can go. I'm sorry." He tried to keep his touch on the creature's leg smooth and soft as he began sawing at the rope with his knife.  
  
The inukom had the audacity to touch Fawnlock. He wasn't sure if the inukom was simple-minded or completely ignorant. Perhaps both. According to the elders, the inukoms with knowledge of the spirits were dwindling. So there was a high possibility that the inukom had no idea that he wasn't allowed to touch Fawnlock; who was a forest spirit of royal blood. Still, the touch was somewhat pleasant, despite his current predicament. Just then Fawnlock felt some of the tension from the trap release his leg.  
  
John had his eyes completely fixed on the knot, which was thankfully giving away now. "Almost there," he said, and then once the knife cut through the rope, he swung his arm under the creature's body as it fell, catching it almost instantly.

Because it had shown signs that it didn't like to be touched, John tried to be as quick as he could when he crouched down to put the creature on the ground. He quickly let go, and then stiffly stood up with a small hiss, grabbing his cane on the way. "There. You're okay now."  
  
It took a moment for Fawnlock to get his bearings. He managed to scramble a little bit away from the inukom. He then sat on the inukom's territory, where he felt a slight sting on his ankle where he had been caught. Afraid that he wouldn't be able to walk on it for long, Fawnlock reached for it with his hand and decided to heal it.

A soft green light emanated from his hands, a simple form of magic that caused the grass to grow and wrap around the wound. It wasn't until a few moments later that he realised the inukom was watching his every move.  
  
Before the creature did anything, John had thought he had seen everything and that it would just run away as soon as possible. But then it apparently conjured up some magic, and he was utterly stunned. Even though he had just stood up, and that it would be painful to bend back down again, he simply had to get a closer look. So he crouched down again. He kept his distance from the creature, though, and just stared. He then huffed a small, slightly panicked laugh. "Wow..."  
  
Fawnlock snapped his head in the inukom's direction. He twitched his ears a little, trying to catalogue and interpret the sounds as best as he could. However, all he could do was watch carefully and observe.  
  
John kept looking in awe, even though nothing was happening now. He was now aware that the creature had just _healed_ itself. With magic. God. Either this was the most elaborate fever dream John had ever had, or he was witnessing something spectacular. His smile widened when he noticed that the creature was looking back at him, and breathed: "that's amazing."  
  
Growing more confused by the minute, Fawnlock stood up from the ground. He saw now that this inukom didn't know its place. This offended Fawnlock greatly, so he spoke firmly, " _I am the spirit of this forest. I do not belong with your kind._ " He tried to convey this by broadening the look of his chest.  
  
All John could hear was more foreign babbling. Wow, this creature was much more intelligent than John had expected. But it apparently still had some animal-like instincts, as it was clearly trying to look bigger to make John shy away from it.

John nodded. "Alright, I can take a hint," he said as he scooted further from the creature, not feeling like standing up just yet. "Sorry for staring. Oh, and also," he added as he pointed towards the dropped sugar beets, "since you're the one so keen on taking my plants, why don't you take those with you? No use for them now, since you've dug them up."  
  
Fawnlock jerked back a little when the inukom moved his hand. He had almost expected to see the weapon again. But Fawnlock sensed no form of aggression. Instead, he saw a certain kindness surrounding this inukom; which pleased him. It was certainly a step in the right direction.

Fawnlock saw the gesture again, but instead he followed the inukom's line of sight. He found the offering nearby, but hesitated before picking the plants up again. " _I will take the offering. Though you do not know the place you have in this forest, inukom._ " He told him without taking a steady eye off of the inukom. For he had yet a reason to completely trust it.  
  
John chuckled. "I have no idea what you're saying, but I will tell you that your language is really lovely to listen to," he said with a small smile. "I'll tell you what. Why don't I keep growing the beets just for you, hm?" he offered, gesturing to the few sugar beets that were left. "Since you're so fond of them. Then you can come here whenever you like and take what you can. And I won't even watch, or be here. How's that?"  
  
Again, Fawnlock tried to listen carefully to the words being spoken to him, but he still couldn't understand. It frustrated Fawnlock that there was a barrier in language. He could hear the different tones and was able to correspond them with the inukom's mood. But other than that, he had no idea what to make of what was being said. Without another word, Fawnlock turned and chose to disappear from the inukom's sight.  
  
All John had to do was blink, and the creature was gone like magic. He still had a feeling that it hadn’t gone far, so he called out: "Feel free to come back any time!" He then slowly stood up again; deciding that after all this, perhaps lying down would be a good idea. His leg was not doing anything for him today. He limped back to the cottage, always glancing over to where the creature had run off. For a moment, he wondered what it had been, and then if he would ever see it again, even just from afar.  
  
Fawnlock lingered around the burrow, but out of the inukom realm. He watched carefully behind a tree as the inukom retreated to its structure. As soon as the inukom was gone, Fawnlock carried himself and the offering further from the burrow, where the inukom's scent was less overwhelming. He sat on the forest floor where he began to eat the plants. They tasted good and sweet; but as he continued to eat, Fawnlock found himself missing the inukom's stronger scent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vocabulary so far:  
> Harina - Deer spirit.  
> Inukom - Spirit language for Human.  
> Inukom realm - The seeing/living world as viewed by humans and “lesser beings”. Realms are not so much a physical place as they are other dimensions. Certain spirits can get between them in order to walk through certain objects.
> 
> Side note: Upon first impressions, “inukom” (aka humans) have no gender to any forest spirit. This has to do with the fact that gender pronouns and names come with familiarity and respect (both of which are rarely given to humans). It also has to do with the fact that forest spirits have a hard time distinguishing a human’s gender for themselves due to clothing.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kudos, bookmarks and such. We appreciate seeing your feedback! Here's a reminder that all vocab notes are at the bottom. So if you see a word you don't understand, shoot to the bottom of the page. Enjoy!

It was becoming increasingly harder to stay away from the inukom, as Fawnlock had found out. Though he wasn't entirely sure why. It was obvious the inukom had no respect for his kind, and he wasn't nearly as interesting as before. But Fawnlock chose to stay close around the burrow, if only for the offerings.

It took a while for Fawnlock to completely forgive the inukom for the way he had trapped him, but he had decided to do so after a great deal of offerings had been presented. It was by the time Fawnlock's alieni roh were growing anew, that Fawnlock was beginning to feel a bit more courageous around the inukom.   
  
Winter was approaching, and Fawnlock had already made preparations for it in a cave not too far off from the inukom's burrow. He had marked it with his scent and used the dried flesh and bone from his alieni roh.

So caught up in his task, he had nearly forgotten about his early morning offering. Fawnlock didn't like approaching the burrow around mid-day, but he felt he had no choice, as his stomach began to protest. So he made his way to the burrow.  
  
John had kept his promise to the creature. No matter how much he wanted to go outside when it came by to pick at his sugar beets, he stayed inside the cottage and only watched from afar. And sometimes he didn't even watch, but just acknowledged that the creature was in his garden. 

He had grown accustomed to it showing up early in the mornings, so whenever he woke up to some rummaging from outside, he knew what was going on. It was almost weird how soothing it was to wake up to it; it gave John a sense of familiarity.  
  
So of course, since it had been a while now, John noticed when one morning the creature hadn't shown up. John briefly wondered if something had happened to it, or if it had gotten bored with the tradition, as it was. Though it was probably a bit closer to the second one. Oh well.

Whatever the case, the creature hadn't been there today, so John decided it would be more than okay to start the day by tending to the plants. So that's what he ultimately did.  
  
As Fawnlock approached the burrow, he noted that inukom's scent was stronger than usual. He moved cautiously through the forest, but made no effort to conceal his presence. When he drew nearer to the clearing, he saw the inukom was awake and inside the place of offering.

Fawnlock froze for a bit, unsure of what to do. Every part of him was telling him to stay away, except for his wild hunger. He decided to hide in the bushes, to see if he could simply wait for the inukom to leave.   
  
While Fawnlock was waiting, he observed carefully. The more he watched, the larger his desire for food became. After a while, he almost became tired of waiting. Fawnlock was about to reveal himself but he hesitated, which caused him to break a small branch beneath his foot.  
  
As John worked, he thought he heard some rustling in the distance, but thought nothing of it, and just continued going over the garden. However, a somewhat loud snap caused him to jerk his head upwards to see if anything was approaching him.

He was ready for the worst, but calmed down considerably when he saw it was simply the deer creature, hiding behind a few trees and bushes as if it was either afraid or too shy to reveal itself. For a moment, John wondered if he should get out of the garden to let the creature go about alone like always, but didn't move.  
  
When the two of them locked eyes, Fawnlock's heart began to race. He was able to get a better look at the inukom. Fawnlock searched its eyes. They were as blue as the cloudless sky above them. He was too far to get a true sense of the inukom’s intentions, so he remained on his guard. 

John was captivated by the creature’s stare. Instantly, he was reminded of Mrs. Hudson’s words; _“The spirits have a way of seeing through you”._ So he tried his best to stay quiet, still and open with his posture. 

After a moment, Fawnlock decided he would get his food elsewhere. As long as the inukom was inside the garden, Fawnlock was sure he wouldn’t be welcome. So he turned away and bolted off into the forest.

As soon as the creature was gone, John was relaxed but he was also deeply confused. Unless the deer was counting the time he had been caught in his trap, John was sure he hadn’t done anything to offend it. With a slight shrug, he continued his work in the garden.

\--

Despite his earlier habits of coming during the morning, Fawnlock began to turn up more during the afternoon. There, he would watch the inukom carefully as he tended the soil. The more he looked, the more he saw of the inukom before him.

The more he saw through it, the more interesting and complex it became. Fawnlock had thought he had the inukom figured out completely, but this simply wasn't the case. He grew more intrigued as he watched the inukom work.

While John found it a bit strange that the creature had changed its habits, simply to watch him, he saw no potential harm in it. It was more than obvious that he had captured the deer’s attention. The thought that he had an audience while he gardened made him smile. He assumed the creature was simply curious.

And how. Fawnlock watched with pure enthusiasm. He didn’t even go into the spirit realm while doing so. If he had, he wouldn’t be able to smell the inukom’s scent. Besides, he had only just come to the conclusion that its scent became invitingly stronger the more the inukom worked. Something that Fawnlock wasn’t willing to abandon. 

When the creature lingered for longer than the last time, John decided to bring his gaze towards it again. He wanted to show how much he welcomed its presence. So he placed his tools down in the garden and continued to look at it.

Once the inukom became calm, Fawnlock became just as calm. He began to grow more confident that the inukom would not hurt him. Especially when it set down the objects in his hands. So without breaking the inukom's gaze, he rose out of the bushes and began to walk closer until he was on the edge of the plain.  
  
John smiled as he watched the creature move closer to him. He wasn't sure if it was taking risks or if it had gotten used to him by now, but he was glad to see that it was at least confident enough to approach him.

Still, he didn't want to be rude, so as the creature came closer, he took a few slow steps backwards. "Should I get out of your way?" he asked and gestured to the cottage.  
  
Now that Fawnlock had a proper gaze on the inukom, he got a better understanding of what was trying to be said. The inukom wanted to leave, but Fawnlock wasn't sure if he wanted the inukom to do so. He had never seen an inukom before his encounter with this one, so he honestly had no idea what the circumstance called for. 

Fawnlock drew closer still and tried to speak with his hands as well. " _Inukom, stay_." He told him as he bent to the forest floor and put a hand on it.  
  
"Oh, you don't want me to leave?" John asked as he tried to decipher what the creature was telling him. He stayed still, watching the creature's small but graceful movements. "Okay, that's fine. I'll stay."  
  
Once the inukom showed no sign of further movement, Fawnlock felt accomplished. He moved closer to the place of offering and kept his eyes locked on the inukom, as if it would vanish if he looked away. Even though Fawnlock grew more curious about the inukom, his hunger was overwhelming.

So he moved slowly to his offering, now only about an arms length away from the inukom. Both the scent from the offering and the inukom was intoxicating. He breathed it in for a moment before moving to take his offering.  
  
John watched and felt extremely privileged to get to see the creature up close like this. He had been certain that after the trap incident, it would never want him to go near it again. And yet there it was, having all but asked him to stay while it took a few of the beets.

John wanted to sit down on the ground just so he wouldn't have to look down the entire time, but figured he might as well stand. After all, he couldn't know if the creature would want that kind of movement.  
  
After digging up the offering, Fawnlock realised he didn't want to diminish any of the scent he was currently taking in. So instead of taking his offering to the woods (where he normally would eat and watch the inukom work the ground) he sat down on the edge of the place of offering. He looked at the inukom, who was standing and doing nothing to entertain him, and spoke. " _Inukom, work._ " He ordered while taking some of the soil in his hand and letting it fall from his hands.  
  
It took John a moment to figure out what the creature meant, but as soon as he understood, he smiled and nodded. "Alright, I'll go make myself useful," he said and continued what he had been doing before the creature had shown up. "Surprised you're letting me do it. I thought you'd want some peace while eating."  
  
Once the inukom began to work, Fawnlock began to eat. He watched the inukom carefully and silently, cataloguing every move and sound. From this, Fawnlock recognised again that the inukom was wounded in some way. There was a small limp in every step, not unlike something Fawnlock would see in any other wounded creature of the forest. Except when Fawnlock sniffed the air, he couldn't smell any blood. This meant the wound was healed over, but still plagued the inukom.

Long after he had finished his offering, Fawnlock lingered in the offering place to watch the inukom finish its daily work.  
  
As much as John wanted to continue working, he found that he had pretty much done everything he needed to do so far. Plus, his leg was really starting to protest any further movement, so he forced himself to stop. 

"Alright, I think I'm done for now," he told the creature, who had stuck around even after having finished eating. "I need to get some relaxation for this stupid thing," John added with a pat on his leg.  
  
Fawnlock could sense that the inukom had reached its limit. He reached out and patted the floor of the offering place. " _Inukom, here._ " He commanded.  
  
John perked, but assumed that the creature meant for him to get closer. Wow. He did just that, but kept standing up. "I would sit down next to you, but I can't," he said, sounding almost ashamed. "I'm sorry."  
  
When the inukom refused his command, Fawnlock flicked his ears in annoyance. Didn't this inukom know he was trying to do it a favour? Right from where he was sitting, Fawnlock reached out for the inukom's leg with glowing hands. As soon as he touched it, he could tell that the damage was severe, so he conjured up more energy from deep inside of him.  
  
The moment the creature touched him John gave a small gasp. Not because it hurt or because it was too surprising, but because he could feel right away that something was going on inside his leg. The stiff joints loosened, the bone that had healed incorrectly was somehow adjusting itself, and even the muscles seemed to relax under the touch.

John stared, in complete awe at what was happening. If he hadn't been looking at it first-hand, he never would have believed it.  
  
Once the healing was done, Fawnlock released the inukom's leg. The green glow disappeared and the forest began to calm. He felt a bit weary from the process, but was able to shake it off. Fawnlock looked at the inukom curiously, gauging its reaction while it was standing only inches away.  
  
The pain in his leg was completely gone, as if there had never been anything wrong in the first place. John carefully moved it, knowing it would be stiff from the work, but was relieved to find that it followed orders perfectly. No strain, no stings, nothing.

John had no words for how amazed he was. He let out a small huff, smiling stupidly, and staring down at his leg. "Wow, you- you just- I don't-- Wow," was all he managed.  
  
Fawnlock saw the expression the inukom was making, and tried to interpret the words it was speaking. Either the inukom was speaking really fast, or the inukom wasn't really speaking at all. He could tell that it was pleased, though. Fawnlock continued to concentrate on the inukom's expression, and tried his best to mirror it.  
  
Having been staring at his leg for a while, John decided to look at the creature now, if only to thank it. He wanted to do something to show is thanks, but was unsure of what to do or say.

All those thoughts vanished, however, when he saw the look on the creature's face. It was as if it was trying to smile, but it looked awfully wonky. It was simultaneously one of the silliest and most adorable things John had ever seen. He knew the creature would think it rude, but he could help it; he laughed.  
  
The abrupt sound made Fawnlock jerk away a bit. He was unsure of what had prompted the noise, or if it was a bad one. He assumed it was a good noise, because the inukom's expression widened. So he continued to watch the inukom curiously.  
  
John took a few steady breaths once he stopped laughing, letting out a few soft chuckles as he finished. "Wow, that's just... That-- _You_ , are amazing," he told the creature while crouching down to at least be at the same eye-level. He could have cried with joy right then and there, all because he felt no pain in his leg. John wanted to convey his gratitude somehow, but instead just nodded and brought his hand to his own chest.

"Thank you."  
  
Fawnlock looked at the inukom with a confused expression. Was it trying to teach him its language? Fawnlock reached out and placed his hand on top of the inukom's.

" _Inukom._ " He told it.  
  
At the touch, John almost expected the same weird feeling to appear in his hand as his leg earlier. He looked at the creature, trying to put together what it was saying. It seemed as though it always used that word when talking to him, so maybe that's what it meant. "Is that me?" he asked and pointed to himself.  
  
Fawnlock patted the inukom’s hand and emphasised the word again, " _Inukom._ "  
  
"Ah, so it is me," John said, amused by the creature's insistence. He decided to try and repeat the word. "Inu-kom?"  
  
Fawnlock grew an excited expression the moment the inukom said the word. " _Inukom._ " He said again before lifting his hand to his own chest. "Voji." He sounded out.  
  
"Ooh, that one's a bit tougher," John said before taking a small breath. "Voh-gee? Is that right?"  
  
When the inukom said it, Fawnlock patted his own chest. " _Spirit!_ " He said again. Fawnlock paused in consideration of what to teach the inukom next. He settled on his true name. "Faw-un, lauch." He said carefully.  
  
"Oh, is that your name?" John asked, not really expecting a reply. "What was it? Fawn...?"  
  
"Faw-un, lau-ch." Fawnlock said again.  
  
"Fawn-lock?" John attempted, his expression sheepish. If that was the creature's name, he didn't want to say it wrong.  
  
Once the inukom said it Fawnlock grew even more excited. He squirmed a little and brought his hand to his chest again. " _Yes! Fawnlock._ " He chirped.  
  
John chuckled, amused by the creature's excitement. "Alright then, Fawnlock. What do you say this _inukom_ gives you a proper introduction too?" he said and lightly patted his own chest similar to how Fawnlock had done it to himself. "Joh-nn," he said, drawing out his name as much as he could.  
  
Fawnlock's ears perked at the sound of his language on a foreign tongue. He watched the inukom as it spoke something to him. He assumed it was a name. "Fawwwn." He tried to sound out.  
  
"Almost," John said with a smile. "It's a bit hard to say first, but I think you can do it." He cleared his throat, and tried to enunciate as clearly as possible. "Joh-nn."  
  
With a determined expression on his face, Fawnlock tried again. "Johnnn." He tried again.  
  
John's smile widened, and he nodded excitedly. "Yes, that's right. John," he told Fawnlock, loving the way the creature said his name.  
  
"John." Fawnlock said again, allowing the name to play on his lips.  
  
"And Fawnlock," John felt he had to say, since the creature was putting so much effort into speaking his name.  
  
Just then, a faint scent caught Fawnlock's attention. For a moment, Fawnlock believed his nose had betrayed him. But there was no mistaking it. He felt a surge of panic run through him, which caused him to stand up from the forest floor. "John, _stay_." He commanded before turning away and disappearing from the inukom realm.  
  
John felt a small sting of disappointment when Fawnlock vanished - not to mention surprised. "O- okay, then." John stood up and brushed himself off. "I'll, uh... see you later, I guess," he spoke in a low voice.

He shuffled his feet a bit and then decided that there was no use standing out in the garden any longer. He picked up his forgotten cane and automatically started using it. After a few steps, he remembered that his leg wasn't in pain anymore, and so walked properly towards his cottage. 

He huffed a small laugh, "But seriously. Thank you."  
  
Fawnlock wandered around the spirit realm, intending to find the source of the lingering scent that intruded on him at the most inconvenient of times. He didn't have to walk far to meet the gaze of his brother. " _What do you want, Moosecroft?_ " Fawnlock asked bitterly.  
  
" _Clarification_ ," Moosecroft replied with a scolding, displeased look on his face. " _Am I to believe that you have not only permitted an inukom to see you countless times, but have come in contact with it twice as well?_ "  
  
" _Yes. Though I hardly see the problem._ " Fawnlock replied.  
  
" _Of course you don't. You're about as ignorant as they are_ ," Moosecroft said, frowning. " _The problem is that you have revealed yourself to a creature I have told you countless times never to let see you. And you touched and spoke to it, as if it was an equal._ "  
  
Fawnlock rolled his eyes. " _The first time was an accident. I followed your stupid rules, but it caught me in a trap._ " He told him pointedly.  
  
" _Yes, because you failed to observe your surroundings well enough because of your curiosity_ ," Moosecroft pointed out. " _And just because this particular inukom was stupid enough to let you go that one time, who is to say what could have happened had it been more vicious?"_  
  
 _"I have observed it. The inukom has a kind heart. That much was proven when it released me from the trap._ " Fawnlock said. " _You shouldn't vilify an entire race just because you've had a bad experience with one inukom, Moosecroft._ "  
  
Moosecroft's mouth twitched in annoyance. " _Need I remind you that yours was fully prepared to kill you when it caught you in the trap? It was carrying two weapons, I might add. That alone leads me to believe that they are all the same. Violent, and always ready to kill_."  
  
" _That was then. The inukom wouldn't harm me now. It's given me offerings._ " Fawnlock told him.  
  
" _Those weren't offerings, Fawnlock_ ," Moosecroft told him. " _If I'm not mistaken, the inukom didn't plant those beets for you. It did so for itself, and nothing more._ "  
  
" _Doesn't matter. They're for me now._ " Fawnlock said with a firm tone.  
  
" _Regardless, I don't want to hear of you speaking to the inukom like that again_ ," Moosecroft insisted. " _We have our language and they have theirs. It has no business knowing how we speak, and you have no business teaching it, either_."  
  
" _Why do you insist on knowing everything I do? This is precisely why I left the artaldea in the first place._ " Fawnlock said through gritted teeth.  
  
Moosecroft's frown intensified. " _Because of instances such as this. You clearly still do not know your boundaries when it comes to the inukom_ ," he told his brother. " _You may continue to take its 'offerings', as you say, but I will not tolerate you touching it or speaking to it_."  
  
" _You may have your spies among the forest, but you are no god. You have no power over me. I will do whatever I please. And if that means talking with an inukom, then so be it._ " Fawnlock told him.  
  
" _You will do no such thing_ ," Moosecroft commanded, his voice booming. " _I would hate to have to banish you for all this unnecessary communication_."  
  
" _You wouldn't. And as long as our father is on the throne, you cannot. This conversation is done._ " Fawnlock said before beginning to turn away.  
  
" _While that's true, I won't hesitate to tell him of this if you continue with this behaviour. In fact, he might force you to come back._ " Moosecroft told his brother, determination evident in his stance and voice. " _Otherwise, I will have to resort to disposing of the inukom_."  
  
Fawnlock froze in his tracks and turned to Moosecroft. He paused to allow the words to sink in. He couldn't allow any harm to come to John. " _Fine. Fine, I'll stay away from it. But I'm not going back to the artaldea_." He said.  
  
Moosecroft smirked, though his features were still tense. " _Pity, I'm sure they all miss you dearly_ ," he said, pleased to hear that his brother was finally agreeing with his terms.  
  
" _Obviously. Or else I wouldn't have to see you again_." Fawnlock spat. " _I still don't know why you're so concerned about me interacting with one lone inukom. It seems excessive and pointless to me._ "  
  
At that, Moosecroft's smirk changed into a small smile, but his eyes were icy. " _Ah, yes, I must have forgotten about your inability to sense others' concern about you_ ," he spat right back, trying desperately to keep himself calm. " _For you see, dear brother, despite your insufferableness, some of our kind still care about you and want what is best for you. And that is not something an inukom can do_."  
  
" _Why? How could you know that? You've never seen this inukom in the flesh. You've only heard of it through your spies tongues._ " Fawnlock said with a small huff.  
  
" _In general, inukom are incapable of thinking of anything but themselves_ ," Moosecroft continued. " _This particular one is dangerous due to its past. They tell me it's prone to violence and outbursts over the smallest things, going so far as to jerk about in its sleep, as if it misses its old way of living. It was wounded in battle, Fawnlock. Twice. And yet it still yearns for more of it. And you claim it's not dangerous?_ "  
  
Fawnlock only glared at his brother. " _I never said it wasn't dangerous. I said it would not harm me. The elders spoke of a time when the inukom and the spirits lived in peace. Is it so wrong to believe that time might come again?_ "  
  
" _Yes. It is_ ," Moosecroft replied, glaring back intensely. " _The inukom have betrayed our trust. Time and time again we gave them chances, but their instinct is always to spread violence. And you cannot be certain that this one will not harm you. For all you know, it could be manipulating you so that it can strike later when you let your guard down_."  
  
" _Why would the inukom want to harm me? The inukom has no piror knowledge of our realm. What benefit would the inukom have?_ " Fawnlock questioned.  
  
" _Oh there are numerous things that inukom fancy_ ," Moosecroft replied, growing more annoyed with his brother with every second. " _Your coat, which it could turn into either a wrap or a floor decoration. Your alieni roh, which it could trade for items it deems priceless. Even just the joy of being able to hang your skull up on its wall will satisfy it_."  
  
As Moosecroft spoke, Fawnlock could feel his insides twist into knots. He swallowed hard and held his tongue for a slight pause. " _You have made your point. I will do as you say and avoid the inukom._ "  
  
Moosecroft's tense features relaxed a bit, although he still kept his head up high, showing his superiority to his brother. " _That is good to hear. I will permit you to take its 'offerings', though they aren't, but any connection with it is forbidden_."  
  
" _Fine._ " Fawnlock said just before turning his back to his brother.  
  
" _And do wash yourself thoroughly after today. I can practically feel the inukom still on you after you touched it_ ," Moosecroft added, scrunching up his face a bit.  
  
Fawnlock made no verbal response to that. He only walked away and flicked his tail in annoyance. Fawnlock despised being told what to do, especially by his brother. In a form of retaliation, Fawnlock went back to his cave and didn't bother to clean himself.

And why should he? The inukom's scent was one of the most pleasant smells he had ever smelled. It was obvious that Moosecroft's hatred was messing with his senses. Any other spirit would have found it just as pleasing. Later that day Fawnlock went to sleep, basking in John's lingering scent.   
  
\--

Keeping to his word, Fawnlock had avoided the inukom. Instead of taking his offerings after daybreak, Fawnlock woke up before the daylight. After he would take his offering, he would carefully step out of the inukom realm. Any time he was around the burrow, he would slip into the spirit realm just so he wouldn't be seen by the inukom. Every day he would watch the inukom work and do other things on its own. Even though Fawnlock could see and smell it, he felt it just wasn't enough.   
  
One day, before the daybreak, Fawnlock was picking through the place of offering when his ears perked at a distressing noise. On instinct, Fawnlock froze and clutched the plants in his arms before making another move. The noise sounded like it was coming from inside the inukom's burrow, so Fawnlock moved slowly to the nearest opening to investigate.  
  
 _Oh God, there's so much blood. It's like it has a life of its own. It's crawling all over the place, preventing him from doing his job properly. The noise bangs at his ears, but he has to try and focus, or everyone around him will die. They're all depending on him. But he can't move. He can't heal them. The blood is consuming him. And oh God, now he knows why. It's not their blood, but his. It's like his veins have turned inside out, and they're throbbing and pounding and there is shooting and bombing and oh God why._  
  
John should have woken up by now. He'd had these nightmares countless times, but it wasn't stopping this time. He jerked and thrashed about in his sleep, muttering and whining as it became too intense. He had thrown everything but the pillow off the bed at some point, but was still sweating and panting furiously.

A slight panic flooded over Fawnlock as he saw the inukom in this state. Despite being warned about this, nothing could have prepared him for seeing it himself. Except when Fawnlock looked at it, he didn't see pleasure. He only saw pain. A pain and discomfort that Fawnlock wanted to diminish instantly. Just as he had done with the inukom’s leg.

Fawnlock dropped his offering onto the forest floor, and walked between the spirit realm and the inukom realm to walk right through the burrow walls. There was absolutely no sound coming from him as he stepped inside. When he came back to the inukom realm he was glowing with magic. Fawnlock stretched out a tentative hand and raised it above John's sweat-filled brow. " _Be calm. Drain your thoughts. Think only of the forest and the calming stream. You are safe now._ "  
  
 _Nothing is working. There is only blood and pain and screaming and he isn't sure he can take much more of this. He panics, going blind with worry and tears. That can't happen. He has to stay focused. Has to do his duty. He has to._  
  
 _And then suddenly something embraces him from behind, and the noises around him silence. At first he panics even more, thinking it's a stealth attack, but whoever is holding him is speaking so soothingly that he forgets the thought instantly. He doesn't really know what is being said, but it calms him down. He looks at his hands; they're dry. There are no more bodies around him. He relaxes into the embrace, wanting to turn around and hold someone back, but he can't move. Instead, he drops to the ground, sobbing silently as the shock takes over._  
  
John visibly tensed even more, turning to his back and clutching at the sheets beneath him. His panting grew more erratic for a few seconds, but gradually his breathing steadied. John loosened the grip on the sheets and raised his hands to his chest, where they stayed, still balled up. He had calmed down for the most part, but still trembled and shivered slightly as he curled into himself.  
  
Now that John was calm, Fawnlock took his hand away. As his magic vanished, he felt winded and tired. Never before had Fawnlock used that kind of magic. He felt glad it had helped.

Fawnlock saw the inukom shiver slightly, and looked to one of the few discarded items on the floor. He brought a covering up and over John's trembling figure, hoping that the inukom would sleep better.

With that, Fawnlock began to turn away to leave, except he couldn't find the strength to go any further. Before he knew it, Fawnlock fell to the floor and slipped into a dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vocabulary so far:  
> Alieni roh - The antlers on a Harina. They determine age and experience.  
> Artaldea - The herd of harina.  
> Elder - a term to describe any forest spirit older than the spirit speaking. A spirit may be regarded as this as a sign of respect.


	3. Chapter 3

It had been ages since John had slept this well. Though he did have some recollection of a reoccurring nightmare, he found that it didn't bother him nearly as much as usual. So when he woke up the next morning, he wasn't tense and clutching at the nearest fabric, and could imagine getting out of bed for once.

Even his shoulder wasn't hurting, which was such a relief that he could have laughed. John sat up and stretched a bit, thankful that for once, his clothes weren't sticking to him due to sweating. Something really miraculous must have happened that night. Maybe the forest really was making everything better.   
  
After a bit more stretching and a few yawns, John decided he was about ready to start the day, and so turned to get out of bed. Only, he froze with a gasp when he saw that there was something lying on the floor of the cottage. He was about to panic, but something wouldn't allow him to go into full soldier-mode. So instead, he slowly approached the thing, trying to get used to the darkness in the room.  
  
Fawnlock's eyes snapped open at the sound and the feeling of weight moving across the burrow floor. He jerked his head up from the crook of his arm and whirled his head around in the direction it was coming from. As soon as he locked eyes with John, Fawnlock grew tense and panicked. " _Inukom, stay._ " He warned.  
  
John stilled, blinking and squinting to get a better idea of what in the world was in the cottage. As soon as he heard the voice (and the familiar word), there was no mistaking it. "Fawnlock?" he guessed hesitantly, wondering if it could even be possible after all this time.  
  
Fawnlock stood up from the floor, knowing that he would have to face his brother's wrath if he lingered any longer. " _Inukom, you must stay. I have to go._ " He said as he began to step between the realms again.  
  
Having gotten used to the darkness, John could just barely tell that the creature was about to leave yet again, so he spoke. "Wait, please," he tried pitifully; knowing it probably wouldn't work, since Fawnlock couldn't understand him.  
  
It was impossible not to tell exactly what the inukom was asking. Not with that tone, the smell and the feeling that John projected. Fawnlock hesitated taking the next step, and ultimately settled himself back into the inukom realm. Fawnlock turned to look at John, his expression full of uncertainty.  
  
John was very surprised to find that Fawnlock hadn't left, which lifted his spirits just a bit. He could see the creature more clearly now, so he smiled gratefully. "You did it, didn't you?" he asked, and then figured he would have to clarify. "Last night, when I was scared," he demonstrated the feeling by curling up and shivering a little, "you fixed it. You made me better."  
  
Fawnlock looked at John carefully, reading what the inukom had to say to the best of his ability. He assumed it had something to do with the dreams the other night. He presented a hand and made it faintly glow with magic again. " _I filled your mind with my thoughts, using magic._ " He explained.  
  
When Fawnlock's hand glowed, John smiled wider. "I don't know what to say. This is the second time you've helped me with your magic," he said softly, wanting to do something to show his appreciation, but didn't know what. "Thank you. I can't say that enough. Thank you so much, Fawnlock."  
  
As Fawnlock watched the inukom speak, he felt John project a sense of gratitude. He was also able to pick out a couple of words as well. "Th-ank... yoo." He tried to say.  
  
"That's my line," John said playfully as he dared to scoot a bit closer to the creature. He knew for a fact that it didn't like too much closeness or contact, so he kept his distance. If only to prevent it from disappearing for weeks like it had done before. "I'd hug you, but I don't think you'd appreciate that. So..." He bowed his head, hoping it would somewhat show his gratitude, "again, thank you."  
  
With John's small action and his words, Fawnlock grew an immediate understanding of what John was trying to say: thank you. This pleased Fawnlock immensely, so he bowed his head in response.  
  
When Fawnlock mirrored his action, John let out a small chuckle. Both because he was glad the creature understood him, and because it was just so adorable. "Hey, Fawnlock?" he began, and rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "Why'd you... disappear?" he asked, trying to convey the last word by doing a vanishing motion with his hands.  
  
Though Fawnlock couldn't understand the particular gesture, he could sense a feeling of disappointment. He could only guess that John was asking him why he had chosen to leave his sight for so long. Fawnlock huffed a little, finding himself frustrated by the language barrier. " _Another spirit. Another_ vo-ji." He tried to explain, gesturing his hands behind his alieni roh, to give the impression that the other spirit he was talking about was bigger.  
  
John tried to look at the gesture, remembering Fawnlock saying that he was a 'voh-gee', but now it seemed as though he was talking about his antlers. No, wait, bigger antlers? Was that what it-- No. Wait, yes. Someone with bigger antlers… Oh! "A different, bigger spirit," he said, more to convince himself than to see if he was correct.  
  
Fawnlock felt as though he was talking to a smaller spirit. Having to gesture and speak so harshly in his native tongue. But this was what he had to do in order to make John understand. " _The other spirit, is angry,_ " He explained before giving a dramatically angry expression. " _He is, powerful,_ " Fawnlock told him while he conjured up a bit of magic in the palms of his hands. " _And hates inukom!_ " He finished in a loud tone while pounding his fist in his open hand.  
  
"Wow..." John breathed, having gotten an idea of what Fawnlock was trying to say, given the theatrics and expressions. The last one in particular struck him a bit. "That voh-gee must really hate me for some reason." He let out a small sigh.  
  
Fawnlock sensed a certain fear and uncertainty in John's voice. He could pick out a few more words as he spoke, and felt the need to correct something. "N... No John. Inukom."  
  
John perked, his eyes wide. He smiled, and huffed a small laugh. "I know I shouldn't be smiling, but wow," he managed between his chuckles. He cleared his throat to compose himself, knowing that this was serious, no matter how touching it was to hear Fawnlock utter his name. "Okay, okay. So not just me, but... everyone like me?"  
  
" _Inukom_." Fawnlock agreed. " _He has spies with wings among the forest._ " He told John as he gestured wildly around with one hand, and another below his eye. " _Which is why I must leave._ "  
  
John watched Fawnlock's gestures and movements, and from the looks of it, it seemed like he was trying to say that this hating voh-gee was looking in on him all the time somehow. "Oh. Right," he said and bit his lip. He nodded. "Yeah, okay. Then you should probably go. Sorry about the..." He pointed behind himself to his bed, "well, that." John then smiled, somewhat sadly. "I'll miss you."  
  
Fawnlock blinked a little, trying to read what John was saying to him. He could sense John being sad, and in that moment Fawnlock realised the unfairness of their situation. He had hardly followed his brother's orders in the past. And even after invading the inukom’s burrow, John still showed Fawnlock an appreciation and acceptance he had hardly found anywhere else.

But then Fawnlock remembered Moosecroft threatening John's safety. Still, he had to let John know that if he had the ability to change this fate, he would. So before parting he drew a bit closer to John.

"Fawnlock... no," he frowned deeply to convey some part of his message, "John. Fawnlock..." then smiled as best as he could, "John." He finished.  
  
Again just from watching Fawnlock's antics, John let out a few chuckles. While the language barrier was certainly frustrating, seeing Fawnlock trying to speak like this made John far too happy for his own good. Especially when the message was so obvious this time. "John likes Fawnlock too," he said, hoping to teach the creature what it was trying to convey with the smile.  
  
The moment John smiled, Fawnlock positively beamed. Likes. He catalogued the word and treasured it deeply. With that, Fawnlock was able to leave John's burrow with an air of encouragement and optimism. He slipped in-between the realms and left the barriers of John's burrow.   
  
\--  
  
"Dear me, it's getting a bit nippy out there isn't it?" Mrs Hudson asked as she whisked herself inside John's cottage, upon invitation.  
  
John hurriedly closed the front door to the cottage, shivering a bit as the cold from outside briefly hit him. "Yup. Winter's definitely here," he said as he followed Mrs Hudson in. "Surprised the frost still hasn't killed all my plants."  
  
"Well I could tell you exactly what's happening to that garden of yours, but I wouldn't want to fill your head with my fairy tales." Mrs Hudson said with a slightly bitter tone.  
  
At that, John's face fell slightly. "Um... yeah, about that..." he began, and then found he had to take a small breath before continuing. "Listen, I'm... I'm sorry I didn't believe you. I was being a complete arse about it." He bit his lip awkwardly, and looked away from the old woman. "'Cause now I've seen one too."  
  
At that, Mrs Hudson grew a surprised and excited expression on her face. "Really? Oh how wonderful! Sit down, come, come," She said eagerly as she pulled him by his sleeve to the kitchen table. "Tell me all about it. And don't spare any detail." Mrs Hudson instructed as she sat down as well.  
  
"Alright, alright, don't get too impatient," John responded and chuckled. He noted the excited look on Mrs Hudson's face, and smiled. "There's not really that much to tell, but here's the gist of it." And so John told her about his and Fawnlock's meetings.

He went into detail of the first encounter, and how the creature loved his sugar beets so much it would come back time and time again just to take a few. How that despite the language barrier, they were still able to somewhat grasp what the other said. How they were able to speak with one another overall. He described the instance with the nightmare, and the healing powers. "And by the way, in case you missed it," he added as he stood up, gesturing to his legs, "no cane!"  
  
Mrs Hudson placed a hand over her mouth in pure shock and joy. "My dear, oh you are blessed. You are absolutely blessed by the forest spirits. This is wonderful!" She exclaimed, with overwhelming tears on the edge of her eyes. "I'm still so surprised that you were able to speak with it. In all my years, I've never heard anyone being able to communicate with them."  
  
"Really?" John was genuinely surprised. "I never would've guessed, what with all the stories. I mean, their language is phenomenally different from ours, but still. I kind of assumed that if they wanted you to understand, they would help you. That's what Fawnlock does, anyway."  
  
"Well, in a time where the forests were much larger, and when we when we had a more spiritual connection, we would communicate to them. But even then they would learn our language. We never learned theirs. Which was why it was so easy for us to lose contact with them. Our languages changed, so they never bothered." Mrs Hudson explained, "The spirits never liked change. Although, those were the older spirits, I think you've stumbled upon a younger spirit." She said with a small smile. "Tell me, how big are his antlers?"

"Erm... Probably about... six inches? Maybe?" John guessed. It had been a while since he had seen Fawnlock. For all he knew, the thing could have grown a lot by now.

Mrs Hudson grinned. "And I'm assuming he's not much taller than yourself?"

"Oh no, if anything he's even shorter," John said and looked over himself a bit. "If that's even possible."

"Then Fawnlock is most-likely a younger spirit." Mrs Hudson concluded. "Ancient, by our standards, but young in the eyes of the other forest spirits. Which is probably why he was in your house the morning after those nightmares. He exerted himself, because he's not experienced enough to perform such magic."

"I guess that makes sense," John said with a thoughtful nod. "Actually, that really makes sense. I hadn't seen him for weeks before that, so he probably did it all by accident." John considered that thought for a moment. "Wow. He did all that just to stop my nightmares. D'you think that means anything?"

"I think it means that you have a very kind, powerful spirit who's watching out for you, dear. And I think it might help restore the ties we had severed long ago." Mrs Hudson told him with a hopeful smile.

"I hope so," John admitted. "Fawnlock says there's this one voh- I mean, spirit who actively loathes humans. I think he gets in trouble for seeing me, and that's why he keeps disappearing. Because apparently, this other spirit is really big and probably dangerous."

"Oh dear..." Mrs Hudson said wearily. "Hate inside of a spirit is like a slow poison, not only to the spirit itself but the forest around it. I would do nothing to provoke this spirit, should it put a curse on you or Fawnlock."

John swallowed hard. "You think it would do that? I haven't done anything to harm Fawnlock. And I'd hate for him to be miserable because of me."

"Unless you're able to figure out why the spirit is upset, and how to make amends, there's no telling what it might do." Mrs Hudson said.

"Maybe I could get Fawnlock to... I don't know, tell me why? And then let me talk to the thing?" John suggested. "Because I'm not going to lie, I look forward to seeing him every day, but he never shows. And it's probably because of that other spirit. I don't think he's necessarily afraid of it, but it looks like he's doing everything he can to not see me because of it."

Mrs Hudson nodded. "I suppose you could try to reason with it. But I don't suggest you go empty handed. I don't mean a weapon, of course. Bring with you an offering of some sort. And when in the presence of older spirits, make all attempts to be smaller, but never break eye contact. Spirits understand you much better when you're looking at them. They can sense your emotions, and a better idea of what you're trying to say." She explained.

"Right. Alright, good. I've got myself a new mission, then. When and if I ever see Fawnlock again, that is," John replied. "God, it's going to be tough explaining it to him, though."

There was a small gleam that appeared in Mrs Hudson's eye when she heard that. "I might have something that could fix that. A temporary one, but it could prove useful to you. It's a simple potion."

"A potion?" John said, his eyebrows raised. "What does it do? How would I make it?"

"The potion would not only give you the ability to hear the spirits, but have them understand you as well. I'll give you the instructions on a note if you have one." Mrs Hudson told him.

"That would be brilliant!" John exclaimed as he all but ran to his writing desk to find a working pen and a piece of paper. He dashed back to where Mrs Hudson sat, and handed her both. "How long would it last?"

"A few good hours. It's not exact, only because it is a potion and thus it reacts to everyone differently. Though don't try to double-up on the measurements, deary. Otherwise you might find yourself speaking in Sanskrit for days." Mrs Hudson warned him as she began to write the ingredients down. After another moment she lifted her eyes from the paper and let John look it over. "There you are, the items are simple enough. The hardest one I guess would be finding a way to pinch off a bit of Fawnlock's fur."

John looked the list over, but stopped when he reached exactly that part. "You're kidding, right?" He let out a low, pitiful groan. "That's never going to happen. He won't even let me near him much less touch him. How am I supposed to do that?"

Mrs Hudson shrugged a little. "I'm sorry, dear, but in order for the potion to work on the spirits your communicating with, you must have a portion of them in the potion itself." She explained.

"Shit..." John breathed as he ran a hand through his hair. "Now I'll have to figure out how to explain that first. That'll be a cheerful conversation. 'Hey, I know you won't let me touch you, but can I get some of your fur?' God, he'll be terrified!"

"I'm sure you'll be able to think of something to say. He's a spirit, John. He understands magic." Mrs Hudson said reassuringly.

"Yeah, I know, but I really doubt he'll be willing to rip a bit of his fur off just for me," John said sadly. "Especially not with that other spirit lurking about. Hell, it's probably spying on us right now and will be telling Fawnlock all about this later."

"John, the spirit has already healed you, and made himself clear on this subject matter. If you explain to him what you're trying to accomplish, he might help you." Mrs Hudson told him.

"I hope so," John sighed. "God, I hope so. But either way, thanks for the list. Think I'll start working on it as soon as possible."

\--

Again, Fawnlock made his way to John's burrow before daybreak. Each time he lingered a little longer, hoping to catch John awake. Fawnlock found himself checking inside every time, to make sure that John was sleeping soundly. He wanted to crawl inside, just to fully embrace the warmth of John's burrow and the inukom's scent. But he held himself back. Instead, he busied himself with digging up his offering to keep his mind off of John. When he rose from the ground, he froze in his steps when he saw light shining from the burrow.

After all this time, it wasn't hard to figure out that Fawnlock only showed up extremely early, while John was still asleep. So John had ultimately decided that he didn't want to wait for the creature; he would seek it out himself. When he saw that he had been successful, he breathed a heavy sigh, thankful that his night hadn't been wasted. Fawnlock looked surprised, though, so John decided to try and explain himself. He took out Mrs Hudson's list and the lantern in his hand, and stepped outside to his garden, where Fawnlock still stood.

Fawnlock eyed John widely. He considered slipping into the spirit realm, but figured that would be useless now. He had been seen. "John..." Fawnlock breathed.

"Hey, Fawnlock," John responded calmly, his usual fond smile up. "Look, I know I'm not supposed to see you, and I'm sorry I interrupted, but I need your help," he told the spirit as he presented the list.

Fawnlock backed away instantly from whatever was in John's hand. His eyes shot around the forest's trees, a surge of panic running through him. They needed to hide. Fawnlock slipped in-between the realms again and went through the burrow wall as quickly as possible.

"I- wha- Fawnlock, wait!" John exclaimed and went around the cottage to follow him inside, wondering what on earth had set it off this time. Curiously, it had decided on the cottage instead of completely disappearing, which was something that came as a complete surprise to John. He wondered if it was because of the paper, and then mentally slapped himself for having flashed it in the first place. Stupid, stupid!

As soon as John was inside the burrow, Fawnlock approached him. " _I told you_ , _the spirit_ _has spies!_ " He cried with slight irritation in his voice.

John had no idea what Fawnlock had told him, but he seemed peeved, which couldn't be a good thing, so he apologised anyway. "Yes, I know, I'm sorry, I really am. But I really need your help." He put the lantern on the nearest surface and brought up the list again, hoping that this time he would be able to explain his motive. "I want to talk to the other spirit," he told Fawnlock, gesturing to his mouth and then doing the same antler move Fawnlock had done when talking about the spirit before.

It took Fawnlock a moment to register what was being said, but when he understood it he looked at John in disbelief. " _You, an_ inukom, _talk to a_ _spirit_? No." He said firmly.

"Yes," John retorted determinedly. "I'm going to make a potion that'll do the trick, but I need something from you too." He gestured to the ingredients he had already gathered, as well as the tools he meant to use to make the stuff. "I hate to ask you, but I need to." A slight pause, "Please."

Fawnlock let out a small huff through his nose. "No. No, no, no. Vo-ji, hate, inukom! Vo-ji, hate, John. No!" He said fiercely.

"I know that!" John said, about as loudly as Fawnlock, but still careful not to raise his voice too much. "That's why I want to try. I want to know why it hates us. Look, all I need is..." He swallowed, knowing this would be the hardest part. "I need a bit of your fur," he finished, gesturing to his arm and nodding towards Fawnlock to make it clear what he was talking about.

As Fawnlock was trying to focus back on what was being asked of him, he grew confused. He understood that John was determined to do this, but the how was escaping him. They had enough difficulties as it was. There was no way Moosecroft would sit around and wait to decipher what John had to say. Fawnlock's head tilted a little bit in response.

Of course he wouldn't understand. John let out a small, irritated sigh, and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Okay, let's try again," he said, and walked on over to the supplies, gesturing to them. "This, is going to make a drink," he made a drinking motion, "so I can talk," a talking motion, "to the other voh-gee," antler motion. "But I need you to give me a bit of your fur," the arm gesture again, "just a tiny bit." Pause. "Kind of like this," he added, and pulled out a few hairs off his own head with a slight wince. "See?"

After seeing all of that, Fawnlock understood right away. He was still very hesitant, though. After all, no inukom was allowed to touch him- let alone drink a portion of his fur. Fawnlock gave a weary sigh and approached John. Perhaps if he aided the inukom in this magical potion, he'd be able to talk some sense into not seeing his brother. "Y- yes." He said.

John was silent for a moment, surprised that Fawnlock had understood and complied so quickly. "O- okay, great,” he stammered, and then went on to prepare the potion. He turned to Fawnlock, a sort of worried expression on his face. "You do it. I don't want to hurt you," he said, pointing to Fawnlock, and making a hair-tugging gesture on himself.

Fawnlock reached for the dark luscious fur around his neck. He quickly pulled out a few tuffs of fur and then he presented them to John.

Hesitantly, John took the hairs and added them to the mix. "Thank you," he said automatically, and then giggled. "I say that a lot, don't I?" he added, more to himself than anyone else, and then waited for the mixture to reach its appropriate colour and thinness.

Fawnlock barely hovered over John's elbow as the inukom mixed the magical potion. He wondered who had taught John to do this, or how the inukom got a hold of the recipe. But he saved these questions until the appropriate moment.

As the hairs dissolved in the mixture, and its colour was about the same as normal breakfast tea, John decided it was about time to drink it. He got out his usual mug and poured it, already dreading what it would taste like, if the smell was any indication. He then lifted his mug, gave Fawnlock a small look, and said: "Well, here goes everything." And with that, he took the first sip.

The moment John took a tentative sip; Fawnlock gave him a deep scowl. Even though Fawnlock was still no master of magic, he knew the potion wouldn't take full effect, unless it was completely drained from the cup. He gestured for John to drink it completely.

The taste made John scrunch his face and shudder, and he was almost scared of finishing the damn stuff, especially since there was still some left in the pot. "Holy hell, this could take a while..." he mumbled, and then held his breath to finish the first mug. He had to make an effort to swallow it all down, and shuddered in disgust when he caught up with the tase. "Ugghhh... One down, one to go..." he groaned as he poured himself the second mug, looking a bit peeky now. Just to get it over with, he downed the second mug more quickly than the first, again having to keep himself from throwing up afterwards.

Fawnlock wasn't sure if it was the fact that he had been around John for a while, or if it was the potion, but he had understood a bit of what John was saying between the swigs of potion. Suddenly Fawnlock found himself becoming incredibly eager. Finally, John would be able to understand him, and he would be able to understand John. It was very exciting. Except, his excitement vanished when he saw the look on John's face. "John _?_ " He asked.

John knew he was extremely pale at this point, and he was starting to feel a bit faint. "Should've taken it... slower..." he breathed before losing his balance and crashing down on the floor. His mind was spinning rapidly and he felt like he was having the worst migraine of his life. Finally he understood what everyone meant when they said they felt like their head was being torn in two. Except he felt more like his skull was being shattered into a million pieces.

When John hit the floor, Fawnlock was sent into a panic. He didn't hesitate to grab John from under the arms and pull him across the floor. Fawnlock continued until he was able to pull John into his nest. It took a lot of effort with John as limp as a dead fish, but he managed it.

Unsure of what else to do, Fawnlock crawled up onto John's nest as well. He settled beside him, and hoped that he wasn't intruding too much. The truth was he was simply too worried to do anything else. In Fawnlock's mind, John wasn't just any inukom; as far as he was concerned, John was his inukom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all again for reading! Feedback is always appreciated, so feel free to leave some kudos or a comment. We really enjoy hearing from you guys. O uO


	4. Chapter 4

While John hadn't exactly passed out, he had no memory of getting into bed after drinking the potion. His head was still pounding when he came to, but he sighed in relief at not having blinded himself. Because at some point, the pain in his head had been so severe that he had been certain it would blow out his eye sockets or something. He ran both hands down his face, and then blinked a few times to regain focus.

" _I am never doing that again_ ," he managed to groan, but then instantly clamped his mouth shut. He sat up in his bed and brought one hand up to his lips. " _Wh- what the hell_?"

Fawnlock jerked his head up when he heard John's voice speak in his native tongue. He looked John over instantly, as if he had never seen him before. " _John. Can you understand me_?" He asked.

John gasped, not just because he hadn't expected Fawnlock to be right next to him, but because he could, in fact, understand him. He let out a small, panicked laugh. " _Y- yeah. Yes, I- I can_ ," he stammered. " _What about you? Am I making any sense to you now?_ "

" _Perfect sense._ " Fawnlock said with a smile. " _Now I can properly tell you that you're out of your mind if you wish to speak to Moosecroft._ " He said as he got out from John's nest.

" _Moosecroft?_ " John had to repeat. " _Wow, you guys have some really... interesting names, I have to say._ " He shook his head. " _Anyway, that's not the point. I don't just want to talk to him. I want to talk some sense into him. I want to know why he's so against us and why you bonding with me is so bad._ " He pursed his lips a bit and sighed. " _Besides, I... really like spending time with you, and I hate that he has to be the boss of that._ "

Fawnlock spun around and looked at John, completely red in the face from embarrassment. He had no idea what to say to such a forward statement. " _I- I could tell you that much. Moosecroft hates inukom. He doesn't see you as an equal, and he never will. Not even if you bonded with me... **especially** if you bonded with me. I am considered royalty in the spirit realm._ " He said in a shocked tone.

John's eyes widened. " _You are?_ " And then the more he thought about it, the more sense it made. " _Ooh, that's why I can't touch you!_ " he exclaimed in realisation. " _I'm just another dirty old peasant to your kind, right?_ "

" _I don't know what you mean by 'peasant' but if it means anything like 'underling' or 'ant underneath the sun' then yes._ " Fawnlock agreed. " _Inukom are generally seen as lesser value to the spirits. Especially in comparison to spirits such as myself. That's what we were raised to believe._ "

" _That's kind of harsh, don't you think?_ " John said, and then made a small face. " _Although, to be fair, I was raised to believe that you didn't even exist and were just stories I read before bed as a kid, so maybe it evens out. But seriously, I just want to know why. Besides, the woman who owns this cottage tells me that if a spirit hates too much, it could spread out around it like a disease or something._ "

Fawnlock jumped a little at that. He had not expected John to know that. " _That's... That's somewhat true. What happens really is that the forest becomes cursed. The spirit will engulf itself in its rage and run rampant all throughout the forest. Moosecroft holds a grudge, but he would never allow his hate to consume himself._ " He said wearily, as though he didn't honestly believe that.

" _Exactly_ ," John said pointedly, as if that had been precisely what he had said. " _And I don't know about you, but I'm not really a big fan of curses and rampages or any of that stuff. So if I could just... maybe try, at the very least. Hell, he doesn't even have to look at me if that's the problem. I just want to hear his side of the story and his reasons for this... well, blatant prejudice._ "

Upon hearing John's reasoning, Fawnlock came to an understanding. " _Alright. I will take you to him. And on the way, I'll try to give you some pointers on spirit etiquette. Since you obviously need it._ "

John chuckled. " _Alright, fair enough_ ," he said, and then came to a realisation. " _Oh, also, I'm going to need a ton of sugar beets if I want him to listen to me, right? Or maybe the other stuff too. What if I just bring a little bit of everything? Think it'll do?_ "

" _Bring as much as you can carry. It's imperative that I don't carry any part of it. Both as a standard gesture, and the fact that I'm of royal blood_." Fawnlock instructed.

" _Yeah, silly me for even thinking you would be anything but a bunch of lazy bastards_ ," John said teasingly and grinned. He could get used to this, if only because he could finally talk to Fawnlock properly. " _But yeah, you're right. Hang on, I'll be right back._ "

And with that, he dashed out into the garden with a big sack, and picked up any fresh and well-formed vegetables he could find. All the while, he couldn't stop thinking about how he was about to speak to the big spirit. That alone should've made him nervous. But strangely, it didn't.

Moments later, Fawnlock appeared walking from the burrow to observe John as he gathered his vegetables. " _John, I believe I've failed to mention something to you..._ " He said carefully.

John was so caught up in his gathering that he didn't even bother looking up, and just kept fumbling about trying to find the best of the bunch. " _Hm? Yeah, what is it?_ "

" _Moosecroft is not only powerful, but he's also my brother._ " Fawnlock admitted.

The admittance came as such a surprise to John that he dropped the dozen potatoes he had gathered. He looked up at Fawnlock and stared. " _Your brother? Your brother is the biggest human hater?_ "

" _Yes. Though I wouldn't say he was the biggest in terms of size. He has the biggest influence among my people, though._ " Fawnlock told John.

John shivered slightly at the thought. " _W- well. I'll just have to make the absolute greatest first impression of all time, then, won't I?_ " he said as he picked up the potatoes again, and moved towards the sugar beets. " _Heh. That shouldn't be too hard_ ," he added nervously, not believing a word he was saying. He was so doomed.

" _As long as you stay low, and never break eye contact, you should be fine. I'll be with you the entire time_." Fawnlock assured John.

He almost didn't want to ask. " _And if I fail?_ "

Fawnlock was silent for a good moment or two, but he couldn't lie to John. " _He said I will be banished, and that he will dispose of you._ "

" _Well then. H- hahh..._ " John swallowed again, trying to compose himself. He gathered up the remnants of what he meant to bring, and walked on over to Fawnlock, trying to look as confident as he would have to seem. " _Let's not waste any time._ "

Fawnlock turned and began to walk into the forest, John trailing close behind. There was another moment of silence before Fawnlock spoke again. " _John... for future reference, never mention of us 'bonding' again. I don't think you realise the exact implications of that word._ " He said.

" _Why? It's what we're doing, right?_ " John said with a shrug. " _Getting to know each other better, finding out about each other's likes and dislikes and such. Pretty basic, isn't it?_ "

It took every ounce of strength for Fawnlock to stop in his tracks and shake some sense into John. " _Bonding is a term we use for our kind when two are... well, mating._ " Fawnlock told him with a heat in his face so hot that he would have been able to melt snow.

The moment John heard that, he froze, and ironically, all colour drained from his face. " _That's not-- I didn't-- F- Fawnlock, you know I didn't--_ " he tried, but somehow his voice wouldn't work. Of all the words he could have chosen, of course he went with the one that meant something else entirely in the other language.

Fawnlock stopped and looked back at John. " _I- it's alright. I didn't think you meant it that way_." He reassured the inukom.

John felt the relief wash over him at that, having initially thought that he had inadvertently ruined the (not bond!) companionship they already had. " _Good. That's- that's really good. So. Uh. Let's keep going then. We only have a couple of hours before the potion runs out,_ " he said hastily, trying to get away from the subject as soon as possible.

At that, Fawnlock began to move again. They continued onward until they were deep into the forest, and inside the spirit realm. Fawnlock couldn't catch Moosecroft's scent, but he caught the attention of some of his spies in the trees. The birds began to gather among the trees in larger numbers as they progressed further. Then, Fawnlock was able to catch a light scent. " _I smell him. He isn't close yet, but I've got him._ "

Biting back the comment of how mildly disturbing the spirits' sense of smell apparently was, John nodded nervously. " _Right. But doesn't that mean that he's got us too?_ "

" _We might be in his territory, but we're travelling against the wind. He won't smell us quite yet. Though, I guess that means nothing if his spies send him a message._ " Fawnlock said as he looked to the trees above them.

" _His spies? You mean he's not the one who's always watching me?_ " John asked, now suddenly feeling very imposed on. One forest spirit was enough; but an array of spies? That was bloody terrifying!

" _Despite his power, he is not able to be everywhere at once. Not yet. So he sends the birds. They tell him everything he wants to know. Everything he's convinced himself that he needs to know._ " Fawnlock explained.

" _And what does he know?_ " John asked. " _About me, that is?_ "

" _He knows that you thrash about in your sleep. He knows you've been in battle, and that you've been wounded. He also knows that I've healed you, twice now_." Fawnlock explained, " _It's safer to assume that he knows everything already. There's no use hiding or lying to him._ "

" _Perfect,_ " John said sarcastically. " _So is he close by? Because I'd like to get this over with as soon as possible._ "

Immediately, Fawnlock stopped in his tracks. He sniffed the air, but caught no scent. " _Damn. I think I lost_ \--"

" _Well, well, dear brother,_ " came a sudden, silky voice, as Moosecroft revealed himself to the two. John tensed, and remembering what he had been told, stared right into the new spirit's eyes. But holy hell was it big. Moosecroft ignored John for the moment in favour of frowning at his brother, his glare as icy as the temperature outside. " _You've come early for your banishment, I see._ "

" _I've only come to talk some sense into you. To show you that this hatred of yours must stop._ " Fawnlock told him.

" _And to do so, you bring your wretched inukom into our realm. As if I hadn't warned you enough already_ ," Moosecroft responded, his voice somehow both sounding exasperated and angry. " _I will need to find punishment severe enough to fit the crime, and dispose of this--_ " He stopped talking the moment he dared to look in John's direction, as he noticed the inukom's eyes on his own.

John, having absolutely no clue if he was allowed to speak or not, decided to do the next best thing; he kneeled down and placed his sack on the ground in front of Moosecroft, never breaking eye contact. He then backed away slightly, gesturing to the spirit to do as he pleased with his offering.

Moosecroft scoffed. " _What is the meaning of this?_ "

" _An offering. It was all that the inukom could carry. To show that the inukom is prepared to offer up everything that it has to give. In the name of peace_." Fawnlock said firmly.

John kept his stance, but because neither spirit had said anything directly to him, he decided not to say anything just yet. Instead, he lowered his head a bit so as to appear smaller (although he was already pretty damn small compared to Moosecroft), and just kept staring.

Somewhat hesitantly, with a disgusted look on his face, Moosecroft poked at John's offering with his foot. It was certainly more than he expected one of this size to carry, but he was sure it would not suffice. He glared at the foreign creature, feeling his rage towards its kind build the more he looked. " _At least it has learned its place in the presence of a spirit_ ," he huffed, " _though I am very unsure it has anything of worthy to say._ "

" _It would if you would be able to listen, brother_." Fawnlock said.

Moosecroft briefly glanced at his brother, and decided that if he was to dispose of this inukom anyway, he might as well hear its petty reasons for not deserving to die. " _Very well_ ," he finally agreed, frowning down at John. " _Present your purpose, inukom_."

There it was. The cue. " _Your highness, I know I'm not worthy of your presence, and I intend to leave your sight as soon as possible_ ," he began, and was relieved to see Moosecroft's mouth twitch, as if it was suppressing a grin. " _The thing is, I have questions_ \--"

" _So do I,_ " Moosecroft instantly interrupted, turning to his brother again. " _Tell me, Fawnlock, how did this inukom come to possess the ability to speak our language?_ "

Fawnlock paused for a moment before answering. " _A potion. Where he had gotten the instruction, I do not know_."

" _Hm. Interesting. Inukom, did you by any chance get the recipe from one of the Fisher clan?_ " he asked John, practically spitting out the name.

John swallowed, trying to remember if Mrs Hudson ever actually told him what her maiden name was. Moosecroft must have sensed his nervousness, because he responded quickly: " _Clearly. And here I thought you could potentially be more respectable._ "

" _Please, your highness_ ," John attempted, " _you must believe me when I say that I have no ill intentions. I only want to... present, some questions_."

" _Your kind has no use of our knowledge, inukom_ ," Moosecroft responded, still frowning. " _That much has been proven in the past_."

" _I know, which is why I'm not asking for your knowledge of the forest, or nature, or the universe itself if you have i_ t," John clarified, mentally preparing himself for what he was about to say. " _I have questions for you, personally, your highness._ "

Fawnlock gazed between John and Moosecroft, trying to isolate and be rid of his nervousness. He was not afraid of his brother in the least, but he was afraid of what he might do to John or the forest.

Moosecroft's nostrils flared. " _You dare question the highest authority in the forest? As if I am one of your measly kind?_ " he roared, causing some of the birds on his aleni roh to flutter off.

John fought the urge to cower, knowing that he would have to keep calm in order for this to work. Well, if his limited knowledge of animals (and royalty for that matter) was anything to go by. " _Absolutely not_ ," he answered quickly. " _I don't mean to use any information you are prepared to give me to do you or your kind any harm. All I want to know are your reasons for feeling so much hatred towards my own kind_."

It was obvious that Moosecroft was enraged, but he did not move, nor did he threaten John in any way. " _Then, pray tell, what is it you want with the information, should I feel inclined to give it to you?_ "

" _Respect, your highness,_ " John responded. " _I want to know what others before me have done wrong, so that I won't make the same mistakes. My only wish is to respect you and your kind as much as I can._ "

 " _All I ask is to know how I can prevent such things from happening again. So please, I beg of you, your highness, to tell me what my kind has done to you._ " He was starting to feel nervous. Not because of the conversation or its possible consequences, but because of his time limit.

Moosecroft took a few deep breaths and closed his eyes, considering what the inukom was telling him. If it was telling the truth, then he could possibly go on ignoring it and let it go about its ways. If it was manipulating him, he could possibly jeopardise his very being. He tried to sense any kind of ulterior motive from it, but could only find guilt, anxiety and curiosity. He heard it beg again, and opened his eyes to find it still looking directly at him. He finally sighed. " _Very well. I will tell you._ "

A relief washed over Fawnlock when he heard his brother say those words. He hardly let it show, however, as he stood firmly on the forest floor and waited for Moosecroft to speak.

" _It all started when the Fisher clan first invaded our forest_ ," Moosecroft began. " _They were new to us, another creature we could help in their harvesting and living condition. We offered them shelter and homes in various places, but were turned down. In the end, they murdered a part of the forest as a means to get by and build their hut. This continued for years on end, until not a single tree in that specific part was left. They chopped them up, hammered into them, burned them, and did everything they could to demolish the trees to as little bits as possible. The stench of it all still haunts some of our elders._

" _They did not recognise their crime until we forbade them to go on with their killing spree. So they begged for reconcile, and were allowed to try and grow the forest back again. Only a few of the trees are back. The rest of the soil went into harvesting the Fisher clan's food sources, despite them having the patch already in front of their hut._

" _We tried as we could to tell them the rules of the forest, and for a while, they complied. There was harmony in the forest for a few years, only because during that time, the Fisher clan had decided to ignore us. So we did the same to them. However, we should have kept an eye on them, as they began raising hunters. Violent creatures that chopped and sawed at anything they saw, including the trees and a few of the woodland creatures._

" _Time and time again this happened. We warned them, they stopped for a while, but then started again. The chopping, the wrong harvesting, and the hunting. We tried giving them our relative blessings to try and see if the next generation would be better, but each one became the same. Each dominant male became a hunter and carried out its weapons throughout the forest, until we became too frightened to even reveal ourselves._

" _One day, just hunting critters wasn't enough. A particular Fisher male began hunting our kind. It gave into its vicious instincts that had now been proven all inukom had, and sought us out in particular, despite our efforts to make peace with it_." Moosecroft's expression grew grave. " _It attacked me. And murdered my mate._ "

Fawnlock listened intently, as he had never heard Moosecroft speak of this before. In that moment he knew exactly where his hatred had been drawn from. The trauma from being attacked by an inukom alone would have resorted any forest spirit to violence. But the loss of his mate as well? Fawnlock supposed they were lucky Moosecroft hadn't gone insane.

Then and only then did John realize who this particular hunter had been. He understood just how much damage Mrs Hudson's father had done. He remembered something else from the old woman's story. " _A- and you avenged your mate by--_ "

" _By ruining their soil and forcing them out of the forest_ ," Moosecroft finished. " _Since that time, not a single Fisher has been able to live here. Only the lone female of the last generation is allowed knowledge of the hut, but it cannot reside there._ "

Which explained why John could. He was obviously not a Fisher. But he was an inukom, which didn't settle well with Moosecroft. " _What must this inukom do to appease you, Moosecroft?_ " Fawnlock asked.

" _It has already made me skeptical in its carrying of weapons and history of violence_ ," Moosecroft replied, not taking his eyes off John. " _That along with its restless and longing sleep patterns, as well as its anxieties in the wake leads me to believe that it misses the battlefield. And that is something I will not tolerate, as it will inevitably cause it to become a hunter_."

John resisted the urge to frown at the spirit. " _On the contrary, your highness. I came here to get away from it,_ " he responded. " _I have no wishes to go back, nor do I dream pleasantly of it. I am haunted by it. And the only reason I still have weapons is because I am... afraid._ "

Moosecroft hummed in response. He poked at the offerings again, and found them all to be very fresh. The smell certainly indicated that. " _The soil seems to favour you, at least. Even if my brother has been helping you during the winter time so far_ ," he said as he glanced at his brother. " _Perhaps I might give you a chance to prove your worth. But if I see even the slightest hint of violence, towards my forest, my creatures, my soil, or my brother, I will see to it that you will be executed._ "

Fawnlock fought back a smile on his face, and refrained from telling John that was the lighter sentence. He couldn't have been happier for his inukom, for presenting himself and facing Moosecroft. " _Thank you, Moosecroft_." Fawnlock said with a slight bow, despite not having done it for ages.

John huffed in relief, having very much expected the worst from this spirit. Despite already being down on the ground, he bowed to Moosecroft as well, trying to contain his racing heartbeat. " _Thank you, your highness_ ," he said. " _You won't be disappointed._ "

" _Yes, yes, very well_ ," Moosecroft said as he batted a hand at John, as if to tell him he should stop talking and leave. " _Now, Fawnlock, get it out of my sight. And see to it that the potion wears off before you come back into our realm. I will not have an inukom understand us for much longer than necessary_."

" _Yes, of course._ " Fawnlock said as he backed away from Moosecroft. He then gestured for John to rise up from the forest floor to follow him. " _Come with me, and don't turn your back unless absolutely necessary_." He instructed in a low voice.

John did as he was told, and followed Fawnlock. His heart was still pounding with relief, and he could have sworn he could leap from the ground just because of how glad he was. He decided not to speak yet, though, as Fawnlock hadn't given him any proper instructions about it.

Moosecroft simply took his offering, turned away and flicked his tail as he walked away. Once they were a good ways away from Moosecroft, Fawnlock stopped in his tracks and turned to John. " _Well, that went better than expected_." He admitted before turning to walk back to John's hut.

" _Oh yes!_ " John breathed, still getting over the fact that he had gotten out of all that alive. " _Now I just have to be extremely careful with my every move from now on_."

" _You will be fine. Once I'm stronger, I will protect your part of the forest_." Fawnlock reassured John.

At that, John smiled. " _Thank you_ ," he said, and then after a moment's pause, added: " _Y'know, I've been meaning to ask. Will I ever be allowed to touch you? Because, honestly, I'd really like to shake your hand or something_."

Fawnlock was unfamiliar with this desire of John's, but he spoke honestly. " _As long as I am a part of the artaldea, then it's strictly forbidden. The day will come soon enough when I am much more free to do something like that without the jurisdiction of the elders._ " He said. " _... Though, as long as they are unable to smell it or ever catch breath of it, I suppose you could... shake my hand._ "

John laughed. " _And are you actually willing to take that kind of risk?_ " he had to ask before doing anything reckless.

Upon hearing that Fawnlock stopped in his tracks and turned to John with a smile. " _Anything, for my inukom._ "

Something about the way the spirit worded that made John feel both flattered and very warm. He smiled back fondly, and presented his hand. " _Alright, then. Your call now_ ," he told Fawnlock.

Fawnlock reached out and took John's hand. Though he hardly saw a reason for such a gesture, he still grabbed it firmly. In that very instant, Fawnlock drew John out of the spirit realm and back where the inukom belonged. They were still nowhere near the burrow, but they were temporarily out of view of any other lingering spirits.

John shook Fawnlock's hand, loving the puzzled look on his face. " _Just to clarify, this isn't just something I randomly had a craving for,_ " he told the spirit as he let go. " _This is sort of a polite gesture, y'know? Like, uh... a greeting. Or in this case, a thank-you._ "

" _I see. We usually bow to those we respect, and ...well the other is harder to explain._ " Fawnlock admitted before releasing John's hand. " _Anyways, we should head back. Follow me._ " He said as he continued to lead John along the icy path.

John almost asked what the other greeting was, but figured he would find out about it later. Sadly, it would probably be in a situation where they wouldn't understand each other, but he was certain they would make it work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We'd like to thank everyone again for the positive feedback. Keep it coming! We really appreciate it!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is an early update because I feel bad. I would like to apologize for the lateness of this chapter. School is kicking me in the ass. But I'm sure you'll be pleased to know that this chapter is longer than the last. Once again if any of the words or phrases confuse you, feel free to consult the end of the chapter notes. Happy reading!

So John followed Fawnlock, wondering how long the potion would last. He didn't want to cause any trouble, and if Fawnlock had to stay another night without permission from his brother, then they could both get scolded.

" _I can sense your worry from here, and I'm not even looking at you_." Fawnlock said as they continued to walk.

" _Sorry, I'll try to stop_ ," John muttered, suddenly feeling like he had to blink more to keep focus. " _It's just... Your brother's really intimidating, you know?_ "

" _He said if you were violent. Have you ever had an intentional violent thought towards me-- besides the first time we met?_ " Fawnlock asked.

" _No, not at all,_ " John admitted. He had to squint to see where he was going now. He kept blinking. Damn. Was it the cold? " _And even then, I was just... I was scared. You were screaming, and it was... scary_."

" _Exactly. So you have nothing to worry about, John_." Fawnlock reassured him without looking at him.

" _Good. That's- that's brilliant,_ " John breathed as he felt a slight sting behind his eyes, and felt them going bleary. " _Listen, could you maybe slow down a bit? I can't really... see where I'm going..._ "

Fawnlock did as John requested, but stopped completely when he caught wind of something else. He turned around to face John and tried to get a better look at him. " _John? John, are you alright?_ " He asked.

John closed his eyes; unable to keep them open any longer due to the stinging behind them. It was as if something was trying to claw its way through his veins just behind his eyes, and reaching throughout the head. " _No, I'm... I'm really not,_ " he managed, now feeling nauseous too. Oh well. " _It's the... potion... Fawnlock..._ "

Fawnlock saw John falter in his step, and reached out to grab the inukom on either side of its shoulders. " _It's alright, John. I've got you. I'll take care of you._ " He said firmly, despite the panic surging through him.

" _You're always taking care of me,_ " John pointed out, chuckling a bit despite himself. " _And I... still haven't done anything to... to pay you back._ "

" _Just promise you'll keep tending to your garden._ " Fawnlock said soothingly, the undertone being 'please live so you can do that'. He placed a hand over John's eyes. " _Hold still, I'm healing you now._ "

" _I don't think that's..._ " John began, but was silenced almost immediately when he did in fact start feeling less pain in his head. It was still there, but only like a slight headache. John closed his eyes and took a couple of deep breaths before feeling like he wouldn't collapse when he took the next step.

It was truly a bittersweet moment. As Fawnlock healed John, he could sense the magic potion drain from his system. In mere minutes, they would go back to wild gestures and constant guesswork. Fawnlock wished that there was an easier, more permanent solution to the language barrier, but knew there wasn't one. They would have to do things the hard way. " _John. I cannot teach you my language. But I want to learn yours._ " He told him quickly.

" _That can be... arranged_ ," John breathed, wishing there was some way he could make the potion's effect last longer. " _Sucks that we don't get to do it this way, though. There's... so much to talk about._ "

Fawnlock felt a smile tug on his lips for a moment. " _Yes. But I fear you would leave your body before you had run out of things to talk about. I don't think it could withstand a strong potion like this._ " He told John. " _Now, just relax. I- I've almost got it_."

" _I really don't want to lose this_ ," John admitted. " _Maybe one day... I'll make another. Just 'cause..._ " Ah crap, here came the feeling faint part.

John felt like a limp, oversized fish in Fawnlock's arms. He held John up for a small moment, before settling the inukom on the icy forest floor. Fawnlock realised it wasn't ideal, but there was no helping it. This time Fawnlock didn't hold back on his magic, and worked to draw out the magical substance just by its aura alone. Once it was gone Fawnlock looked at John warily. "John?" He asked curiously.

The headache subsided, but there was still a small pounding that John assumed was from exhaustion. He looked at the spirit and smiled sadly. "Gone, Fawnlock. It's gone."

Fawnlock didn't have to understand John in order to know that the inukom was just as disappointed as he was. He frowned a little at John, knowing that if he were more experienced in magic they wouldn't have this kind of problem. It made Fawnlock frustrated.

For a split second, John thought that Fawnlock was angry with him for some reason. Then he saw just how alike they were, in the sense that they both wanted to keep speaking to each other. Now that the potion was gone, they'd have to work much harder on it. "It's okay," John finally said and let his hand hover over Fawnlock's for a moment. "We'll be okay."

Before John could pull his hand away, Fawnlock took it into his own. He couldn't have cared less about the elders or their rules. They both demanded a certain comfort at that very moment, and all they had was one another. "O- oakay."

An odd kind of warmth spread through John at the touch, and he swore that for a moment, he couldn't feel the cold air surrounding him. He did need to get inside soon, though, so he squeezed Fawnlock's hand and slowly stood up. "Do you want to go home right away?" he asked the spirit. "Or check on the garden first? Probably isn't much left of it, since I gave practically everything to your brother..."

Now that Fawnlock had a better look at John, he understood him a bit more clearly. " _You. I want to stay by you_." He said as he clasped John's hand with a little squeeze. Fawnlock wanted to be sure the potion was fully out of John's body. So staying close was one of his options to make sure of that.

Oh. Not the garden. The spirit wanted to be at John's side, personally. He smiled at Fawnlock and nodded, gesturing for the two of them to move along. "Okay. Let's go, then."

\--

Ever since that day, Fawnlock continued to visit John. He enjoyed being a daily part in John's life. Winter had come and passed, giving way to the new blossoming plants.

Fawnlock felt as though he had purpose and a new meaning around his inukom. Every day he was learning more about the language, and the customs of John's kind. In turn, Fawnlock would trade bits and pieces of information. He provided tips on survival, and guided John along the landscape. This gave John more of an opportunity to step away from the cottage and take in his surroundings. 

Wherever they ventured, they were together. They were almost inseparable, even though they returned to their respected environments at the end of the day. Between that time John continued to give offerings, except in the form of cooked meals. It was becoming more common for him to eat outside under the sun, especially when the weather was just right.

“Muttisol.” Fawnlock chuckled as he observed how tan John had become.

John stopped chewing and eyed Fawnlock curiously. “Whass’at mean?” He asked, his mouth nearly full.

Fawnlock wasn’t sure how to place it in John’s words, but he tried his best. “Touched, by sun.” He said as he placed his index finger on John’s forearm.

Upon hearing that, John chuckled. “I have been getting a bit tan, haven’t I?” He asked. Fawnlock simply nodded before returning to eat his salad.

This time, John kept an eye on him. He was proud of how fast Fawnlock learned things. A few months back Fawnlock was burrowing in his garden for food, and now John had taught him to use cutleries (more or less). Fawnlock hadn’t tried picking up his knife since the last time he picked it up from the wrong end, but he was using the dishes provided to him. The spirit was beginning to handle human things with more ease.

The truth was, John was enjoying Fawnlock’s company as much as he was enjoying his. He adored teaching Fawnlock more about human behavior, and how to speak in his language. It was challenging at times, but every time Fawnlock understood a concept or a word, John was overwhelmingly pleased. Just the same, John enjoyed Fawnlock’s insight.

John swallowed a bit before speaking again. “Y’know, you don’t have to go back to your cave. You can always just stay with me.” He offered.

The statement made Fawnlock freeze, his eyes glued on John. His ears twitched, wondering for a moment if he had understood John correctly. “Fawnlock… stay with, John?” He asked, pointing towards the cottage.

“Yes. You can stay if you’d like.” John assured him with a nod.

Fawnlock gave John a slight frown. “Fawnlock, not inukom. Not like John.”

It took a moment for John to process what exactly Fawnlock was trying to convey. “What? You think that if you move in with me you’ll become more human?” John asked.

Fawnlock nodded firmly.

John chuckled at the fact that Fawnlock thought he would change into a human for simply staying inside his cottage. He stood up from the meadow, took Fawnlock’s bowl away and gestured for him to stand. “Come on you silly creature, follow me.”

Fawnlock followed John into the cottage without another word. He had been inside a few times, but he had hardly paused to observe the interior. John’s cottage was small but very inviting. The entire space was left completely open, something Fawnlock enjoyed.

“I know you’ve been in here before, but I don’t think it’d hurt to take another look ‘round.” John said.

While John was trying to give Fawnlock a small tour, the creature became distracted. It made sense that John’s scent was even stronger inside. Fawnlock just hadn’t particularly noticed it. Not until he edged closer towards the bed.

“And here’s the kitchen—“ John stopped when he felt an air of absence. He turned around and saw Fawnlock falling onto his bed. John placed their dishes in the sink and smiled. “And that’s my bed.”

Fawnlock filled his lungs with John’s smell. He burrowed his nose in the blanket, hoping to extract more of it. Fawnlock simply couldn’t get enough of it. He grabbed at the blanket and pulled it around himself.

John approached the foot of the bed, grinning from ear to ear at the sight of the spirit wrapped in his bedspread. He personally couldn’t see the benefit, but he could tell that Fawnlock certainly enjoyed this. Not only did Fawnlock have the most pleasurable look on his face, but also he began to do something John had never heard before.

There was a low rumble coming from the pile of sheets that Fawnlock had piled on top of himself. It sounded something not unlike a cat would do. “A- are you purring?” John asked with a small laugh.

Immediately the low sound stopped when Fawnlock perked up, causing some of the sheets to fall and expose half of his face. He looked at John with a confused expression. “Fawnlock like… ss- smell.” He said.

And then John understood. “Okay I see. Come on off there before you put holes in the sheets.” He said.

Fawnlock tried to follow John’s gesture but only ended up falling off the side of the bed in the process. John burst out laughing at the sight. The spirit began to fight off the sheets and stood up from the floor. His cheeks burned lightly from his embarrassment, but he still spoke to John firmly. “I will stay…” He said.

The words brought John’s attention back onto Fawnlock. “Well then I’m glad that’s settled.”

\--

A few months down the road, Fawnlock was exuding a lot of progress in John’s language. He had yet to learn how to fully read, but John was telling him he was coming closer to it every day. So instead of reading on his own, the both of them made it routine to settle in their bed and Fawnlock would simply listen to John read aloud. Half of the time, Fawnlock couldn't understand it, but he could pick out a few words and phrases. When the sun had finally set on their long and lovely summer day, Fawnlock was the first to climb into bed. "John, read."

"Demanding little tyke, aren't you?" John teased as he walked over to his bookshelf to pick one out. "Well. Guess you're not so little anymore now. What do you want to read tonight? Short story? Fantasy? Something exciting?"

Fawnlock paused to think about it for a moment, until he looked at John eagerly. "Exciting." He told him.

"Alright, exciting it is," John said as he scanned through his books, trying to find something that would fit the criteria. And actually, the bulk of his 'excited' section had a subgenre as well. So he settled with one of those and picked it out, walking over to Fawnlock and presenting it to him. "How about this one? It's exciting, and a bit spooky."

As soon as Fawnlock heard that he took the book in his hands and scanned it over for himself. He breathed in the scent, finding a pleasing scent of an old decaying book and John at the same time. Fawnlock nodded and patted the vacant space next to him. "Yes! Now sit, read."

John chuckled, and decided he would never get used to Fawnlock's eagerness, no matter how big the spirit got. It was always the most adorable thing he had ever seen. So he got into bed and sat down next to Fawnlock, taking in his presence before he opened the book and started reading.

When John read, Fawnlock was taken to a far off land. He listened as intently as he could. His imagination ran wild constantly, which helped him nod off into a deep and peaceful slumber.

Despite the book's content, John found that it relaxed him immensely to read to Fawnlock like this. The warmth from the summer night could possibly have been a factor as well, but nevertheless, he was extremely soothed. Especially when he noticed that the spirit had fallen asleep beside him. God, how John wanted to hold him, just so his own sleeping self would know that he wasn't alone in the night. But he knew he couldn't. Not when Fawnlock's elders were still keeping a close watch on what happened to him.

When he was certain that the spirit was fully asleep, John closed the book and put it on the nightstand, careful not to wake Fawnlock. He pulled the sheet over himself, and then decided that even though it was summer and that Fawnlock was covered with fur, he might as well show a caring gesture. So he draped the sheet over the spirit as well. He then settled down himself with a long yawn, and fell asleep.

Hours later, Fawnlock was awoken abruptly by a sudden jerk that nearly threw him out of bed in a panic. Because of his time spent in the forest, Fawnlock was a light sleeper, a trait embedded deep inside him to ensure his survival. So when he felt and heard John thrashing about, Fawnlock was wide-awake.

_It's an ambush. They're surrounded, and a massive shootout breaks out. John lays low and tries not to get too caught up in it all, as he knows he has other duties at the base. But he is grabbed from behind and yanked off the ground, thrown hard down on his back. They have a rifle pointed to his face, and babble something in a foreign language. John tries to draw out his weapon, but they step on his wrists, preventing him from even bracing himself. They scream and shout something at him, as if they're trying to get information out of him. He doesn't know. But the shooting behind him is torturous, as is the screaming of his dying comrades. He can practically feel the blood splattering about._

_They drag him somewhere; a warehouse. It's dark and gloomy and smells of blood and guts. John shudders at what could possibly be lurking in the darkest corners. They poke his temple with the rifle, and continue screaming at him. He ends up yelling 'I don't know!' and instantly gets stabbed in the thigh. They continue screaming as he roars with pain, and now the universe is kind enough to translate. He distinctly hears one of them say 'bring the thing' before sending a few out. They come back with something that John now knows are going to use so he'll talk. The one left cuts his arm and tells him they'll torture 'the thing' to death if he doesn't comply._

_They come back with 'the thing', and start working their knives on it, causing it to howl in pain. John tries to scream 'NO!' but no sound will come out._

_'The thing' is Fawnlock._

John's thrashing about was more prominent than usual, as he was trying to struggle out of a grasp that wasn't there. He whimpered and whined, mostly 'no' over and over again, clutching the sheets and panting hard.  
  
For a moment Fawnlock sat beside him, not entirely sure what to do. John hadn't had a fit like this in quite some time, and even then none had been this intense. Fawnlock tried his best to remain calm and concentrate on the best way of handling this situation. Without a greater idea in mind, Fawnlock conjured a bit of magic to his hand and placed it on John's forehead. He closed his eyes and tried to concentrate deeply on weeding out the negative dreams and thoughts inside John's mind.   
  
Apparently that wasn't enough, as Fawnlock noticed John struggling even more. Keeping his hand planted gently on John's sweat-filled brow, he crowded John until he was in a full embrace. He edged close to John's ear to speak to him in his native tongue. He gave John a small spell. One that would soothe his jerking muscles and more effectively calm his heart. 

After that, he spoke to him more soothing things in his native tongue. "John. _You must be strong. Think of the forest. The morning breeze and the smell that rises from the early summer ground. The warm light. The garden. Think of everything we have shared. Dream of that. Dream of me._ "  
  
While John had calmed down physically, he was still looking very anxious and scared. Something resembling a choked sob emitted from his throat, and he lifted his hand as if to reach for something. "F- Ffawwwn... nnnooo..." he mumbled, his voice hoarse.   
  
 _He can't watch it anymore, so he turns away, unable to do anything. He begs and pleads but they won't stop. He tries to remain strong, but eventually breaks down in front of them. They laugh at his dismay, and at Fawnlock's pain. Then one of them grabs him from behind and starts talking to him in the foreign language. Only, the touch is much softer than it was before, and the voice is soothing rather than threatening._  
  
 _Oh. It's the one from when he was at camp once. So whoever has grabbed him doesn't belong here. They're trying to calm him down. He doesn't understand what they're saying, but ends up closing his eyes and breathing deeply. For some reason, all he can think about is Fawnlock and their times together. When he opens his eyes, that's what he sees. Fawnlock, alive and well, and inviting him to embrace him. John runs over, faster than he has ever run in his life, and suddenly forgets everything about spirit rules. He embraces Fawnlock, keeping his hold warm yet desperate, as he mutters something about having thought he would lose him. Fawnlock doesn't hold him back, but it doesn't matter. John is just thankful to see him alive._  
  
"Fa- Fawwnnn..." John mumbled again, now with a tear trickling down his face. His hand dropped, but it still looked like he was trying to find something to grab a hold of.  
  
Fawnlock was pleased to hear a part of his name. It told him that John's bad dreams had left him. And despite having achieved this, Fawnlock continued to hold onto John. He felt as though if he remained like this, he would be able to ward off any further nightmares. It was a silly notion, as he would later realise, but there he remained. Fawnlock took his hand away from John's forehead to embrace him further. At this point, he couldn't be bothered with the rules of his people. John needed this. He needed him.  
  
 _It's insanely comforting. It shouldn't be, but it is. John just holds Fawnlock, muttering everything and nothing. He doesn't even know what he's saying anymore. All he knows is that he's thankful, relieved, and for once, not scared. And that's when he feels Fawnlock's arms come around him as well. The spirit sooths him, caresses him, and starts speaking to him in his foreign tongue. John could cry from the sheer beauty of it all._  
  
The change in his dream was so phenomenal that John actually managed to smile in his sleep. The searching hand finally found something to hold, and John turned towards it and wrapped himself around it. His breathing steadied, and although he was still shaking and sweating a bit, there were no signs of him still having a nightmare.  
  
When John enveloped himself around Fawnlock, he felt a sense of pure joy and contentedness that he had never experienced before. He felt wanted when he was caught in a moment like this. Which was something that he never had when he was with the artaldea. Fawnlock continued to hold John and speak to him gently. He lost track of the time and the circumstances as he continued to soothe John before falling back asleep with John in his arms.  
  
\--  
  
The last thing John remembered seeing in his mind before he woke up was a field of some sort, with a soft, flowing stream going through the middle of it. Something about sunlight and warmth as well, but the field was a very strong vision. At any rate, for once, he didn't jolt awake from a nightmare, although he didn't wake up on his own accord. What woke him up was an annoying tickling of his nose that he even felt in his dream. He huffed and wiggled his nose, but it wouldn't stop. So eventually, he forced himself awake, despite the pleasant dreams.   
  
He didn't know what he had expected, but he certainly hadn't thought he would wake up with his face pressed against Fawnlock's chest. They both had their arms around each other, and their legs were tangled up in what John initially thought was a knot they'd never get out of. At first he panicked, knowing that he wasn't allowed to do this. But then it dawned on him: Fawnlock obviously wasn't doing anything to stop it either. If he was even awake. Was he awake? John craned his neck up to try and see, but couldn't tell. So, despite everything, he relaxed against the spirit and breathed slowly, trying to get as much out of the moment as he could, just in case Fawnlock would jerk away as soon as he woke up.  
  
As it turned out, Fawnlock was still fast asleep. And he remained that way, warm and full of bliss, until he felt something move against him. The touch was faint, but Fawnlock was a light sleeper on all accounts, so his eyes slowly fluttered open. It was at that moment, Fawnlock had realised exactly what he was doing. Except, he made no immediate move to stop it. In fact, he did quite the opposite. He knew that John was awake, but he renewed his hold on him and gave a small contented sigh.  
  
Well. That was certainly surprising. John even gave a small gasp at how unexpected the movement was, as he had thought that Fawnlock would immediately shy away from him the moment he realised what was going on. So to have him tighten his hold was both surprising, but also very pleasant. John had tensed for a moment, but gradually relaxed into the touch, bringing the spirit closer as well. "Morning..." he murmured, his voice slightly hoarse from sleep.  
  
"Mmm." Fawnlock hummed in response. He was simply too happy for this recent development. Fawnlock decided that he would find no greater joy than John holding him and touching him in this way. He never wanted to leave the bed, or John's side. Still, he reflected on what had put him here in the first place. "John... bad dream." Fawnlock expressed in a quiet tone.  
  
John made a small face at that, not wanting to remember what about. "Hm. Typical," he said, and then had a thought. "Hang on, I didn't kick you out of bed or anything, did I? 'Cause, you know, I tend to... move about a lot. When it happens."  
  
"No," Fawnlock assured him. "I help you. Gave you good dream." He told John.  
  
"Oh," John breathed, and at that, he remembered the bit with the embrace and the foreign talking, and only now put together that it had happened before. He almost felt ashamed. "Did you exhaust yourself again?" he had to ask, knowing what had happened the first time.  
  
Fawnlock had to pause to reflect on it for a little while before he responded. "A little. Getting better." He told him.  
  
"Christ... Okay, I really need to start actually making an effort to get these to stop," John said, subconsciously tightening his hold on Fawnlock. "Because seriously, you help me with all these things, again and again, pushing yourself over your limits, and what do you get in return? Bugger-all, that's what."  
  
Fawnlock was confused. He thought John would be happy that he had helped him. "John... angry?" He asked carefully.  
  
The word alone made John's stomach plummet, and he felt a sting of guilt. _Ace job, John. Can't even be bloody grateful, can you?_ "No. Nonono, absolutely not," he reassured Fawnlock. "I'm very, very happy that you're always doing these things for me. I just... wish there was something I could do in return."  
  
The words caused Fawnlock to consider just what John did for him. "John... gives food. Shelter. John does enough." He told him.  
  
"It doesn't really feel like that, though," John told him. "I did all that to begin with, really. But you, you're just... a lifesaver, almost literally. Healed my limp, help my garden, ward off my nightmares, keep me company..."  
  
Fawnlock considered these things, but still felt as though John had long given compensation for all those things. He pulled away from John to look at him properly. "Fawnlock likes John." He expressed, hoping to convey that he didn't expect much in return.  
  
John looked Fawnlock in the eyes, and there was something about them that made John feel like there was something more behind the words. As if he thought that because John hadn't responded positively to his help, John didn't feel anything for him. He needed to fix that. "I like you too, Fawnlock," he told the spirit, smiling fondly. "Very much."  
  
Upon hearing those words, Fawnlock smiled at John. His heart felt like it was going to burst from pure joy. Without reflecting on it much, Fawnlock placed his forehead onto John's and brushed his nose along John's.  
  
Of all things, John couldn't have been prepared for that. Sure, some closeness was inevitable, but given how close they were already, John hadn't known what else could be done, so the forehead thing was perhaps the most obvious. However, his nuzzle was not. And with his history, John would have thought he would jerk away or back off or something. But he didn't. If anything, he became even more content, feeling a slight heat in his cheeks. He even went so far as to copy he movement before Fawnlock stopped. John smiled. "What was that for?"  
  
"I am happy." Fawnlock stated simply. "John makes Fawnlock happy."  
  
John chuckled, closing his eyes and resting his forehead against Fawnlock's. "So do you. I told you, you're practically a lifesaver," he said softly. "I was a wreck before you showed up. Ruining my cabbages all over the place."  
  
Fawnlock grinned at that. He remembered picking through John's garden, curious and unaware of John's presence. He reflected on those times before he had caught John's sweet scent. "My forest was... empty, boring, before John." He admitted.  
  
Just then, John realised how alike the two of them were, despite their different appearances and very different cultures. "Well, my _life_ was empty and... well, okay not boring, but definitely worrisome, given my, uh... issues, but—“ He laughed. "Point is, I am so glad I met you."  
  
Those words made Fawnlock feel even happier than ever before. He gave a small sigh and pulled John closer again. At that moment, Fawnlock began to realise something. Throughout the months he had been spending with John, Fawnlock had felt a constant presence among them. It was as though they were being watched. But now, he felt nothing. He felt free to do whatever he pleased, and not because he was acting in a rebelious manner, but because something had happened. It took him a moment before realising just what it was. Fawnlock's eyes widened. "Heldua..." He breathed.  
  
"Hm?" John perked. "What was that?"  
  
Fawnlock pulled himself away from John as he began to realise the full implications of this. He had reached the age of maturity. This didn't just mean that he would become more powerful, but it also made things complicated. "I must leave for the artaldea." Fawnlock told John.  
  
John was hit with a sting of worry at Fawnlock pulling away so abruptly, and for a moment he had the bizarre thought of having done something wrong. "Artal... Oh, your people," he said, and after a moment's pause, added: "why?"  
  
"I have reached heldua," Fawnlock tried to explain, "a- adult. Mature." He said. Fawnlock had briefly gone over what would happen with John; telling him that the elders would have no more authority over him. But he had yet to tell him the reason for why he had to leave. And he wasn't sure if he could comfortably tell him.  
  
"Oh," John responded and pursed his lips a bit in thought. "Right. But, that's good, yeah? No more literal Big Brother watching over all the time. Why would you need to go back?"  
  
Fawnlock shifted so that he was seated on the edge of the bed. "I... need to take care of, something." He said, unable to look directly at John.  
  
John nodded slowly, feeling like he was missing out on something. "Alright. Alright, okay, that's fine," he said. "Big step in your life and all. Makes sense that there's some business to take care of."  
  
"I... could maybe not return..." Fawnlock admitted, growing more nervous about what was to come later on. In the history of his kind, denying tradition wasn't the best thing to do. It had consequences, and some of these were direr than others.  
  
At that, John simply had to move over to sit next to Fawnlock, if only to see his face. He wasn't sure he liked where this was all going. "Why not?" he asked. "What's going to happen?"  
  
Fawnlock swallowed a bit. "Heldua, means mature. Mature stay with artaldea. Or they are, punished. I don't want artaldea. I... I want to, stay." He explained, knowing that was only the half of it.  
  
John felt his heartbeat quicken, and stared at Fawnlock in disbelief. He couldn't see the spirit's face clearly, but there was something so unbearably sad about his voice that unnerved John. "Well, that... I- That's a bit unfair, isn't it?" was all he could think of. "Forcing you to stay behind." He almost added that he wanted Fawnlock to stay too, but decided against it. "So what happens if you don't go? What's the... punishment?"  
  
"To deny artaldea, is... banishment. That is good. Other would be soulless, or sent to Yamahvan. Realm of demons." Fawnlock told him.  
  
John's worries turned into panic, and he mentally slapped himself for having been so selfish as to think Fawnlock could just stay with him without any severe consequences. "Execution..." he breathed, and then shook his head bitterly. "Wow. First we can't meet because you're not allowed to be in contact with me, and now we can't see each other because otherwise you'll be killed. Isn't that just... great."  
  
"I am royal. I will speak to artaldea, and father." Fawnlock said firmly.  
  
He hated having to say this, but he felt like he had to. He tentatively put his hand over the spirit's, and sighed. "Look, Fawnlock, I want you to stay just as much as you do. But if you rebel, and it ends up getting you killed, I don't know what I'll do. Especially knowing that it'd be my fault."  
  
Fawnlock looked at John with sadness and frustration in his eyes. "No..." He said before standing to his feet. "No. I will go. I will speak. They will listen." Fawnlock growled.  
  
"Fawnlock," John said firmly as he stood up as well.  
  
The spirit turned to John, now feeling angry. "I am royal blood! I will not follow them. Not now. Not ever. I am happy, here! Not with them." He continued to say.  
  
"Fawnlock, would you just listen to me?" John cut in, frowning at the spirit, his hands clenched into fists in frustration.  
  
Fawnlock glared and huffed in John's direction, but his mouth remained shut in response to John's request.  
  
"Thank you," John huffed, still frowning. "Now look, I know this is a big deal, and that you could technically get out of it. But if staying with your people means you'll still be able to watch over me, then that's a whole lot better than knowing I'm responsible for your death." He looked down on the ground, unable to face Fawnlock's glare. "All I'm saying is, just... be careful, alright? I don't want you dying on me."  
  
Fawnlock huffed in response. Even without knowing the entirety of his plight, John was making sense. Even though it wasn't what they both wanted. "Okay." Fawnlock said, somewhat begrudgingly.

Just then, a soft scent rose to Fawnlock's nose. It was familiar, but he couldn't place exactly where he had smelled it before. But oh, was it sweet. More so than John's; if it were possible. It took a moment for Fawnlock to realise he had been rendered silent for a good minute or two. Embarrassed with himself, he turned away from John and began to walk away.

"I must go."  
  
John sighed and nodded, already hating the fact that this could potentially be their last conversation. "Okay. You go take care of business," he said, trying not to sound as bitter and sad as he felt. "But, just in case I don't see you again, I... Thank you. For everything."  
  
Fawnlock paused to turn and cast a small glance at John. He gave him a small nod before turning away completely. Fawnlock opened the cottage door and walked outside. Immediately as he went, he was hit by the sweet scent from before. He took another few steps and was met with another spirit. Not just any spirit either; his potential mate.

" _Hello, Fawnlock_." She nearly squeaked with a slight bow.   
  
" _Doelly_..." Fawnlock acknowledged.   
  
" _I haven't seen you in years... The artaldea told me to follow your scent, which lead me here. Is this where you've been staying?_ " Doelly asked curiously.   
  
" _Yes. Now let's go_." Fawnlock told her, not wanting to go into any more detail.  
  
Because John had expected to see Fawnlock vanish like he always did, he was just as taken aback as the spirit was when he stopped. He then heard another voice outside his door, one he didn't think he'd heard before, and got curious. "Uh, Fawnlock?" he began as he walked towards the spirit. "What's going on?"  
  
Doelly instantly tensed and began to vanish from the inukom realm, but Fawnlock reached for her wrist and she froze instead. He almost wanted to allow Doelly her escape, but he knew he would have to explain at some point. Fawnlock looked back at John. "John... Doelly." He introduced.  
  
Initially, John wanted to make another comment about the exotic names of the spirits, but the comment died in his throat as he finally put together what was going on. He looked at the other spirit, who seemed just as nervous about the situation as he had felt earlier. "Oh," was all that came out of his mouth.  
  
"At birth, voji are given... mates. Doelly... is my mate." Fawnlock admitted. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Elder - a term to describe any forest spirit older than the spirit speaking. A spirit may be regarded this as a sign of respect.  
> Inukom - Human in spirit language.  
> Artaldea - The forest spirit herd.  
> Yamahvan - Death. The underworld for demons, cursed spirits and evil beings.  
> Harina - Deer spirit.  
> Heldua - a crucial point in a Harina's life where they reach magical and physical maturity.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Fawnlock make a very important decision about what kind of life they will lead. How will Doelly, Fawnlock's mate, react to this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cute fluff dead ahead!

"Yeah, I figured," John told Fawnlock, trying to ignore the shocked face on the other spirit. He kept looking at her, for some reason unable to stop staring.  
  
"This... is why I must speak with the artaldea." Fawnlock told him. "I do not want this life."   
  
" _I- it knows parts of our language?_ " Doelly asked, shocked and feeling mildly offended.  
  
John knew it was completely mental to even think of asking, but he did anyway: "What _do_ you want, then?"  
  
Fawnlock broke eye contact once John had asked him. He fidgeted a little before answering. "John," was all he said.  
  
At once, John tore his eyes off Doelly and looked over to Fawnlock. Once again, he felt his cheeks heat up, and he was very unsure of how to respond. Because for someone like Fawnlock, that could mean a bunch of things. He swallowed and nodded. "Okay. I... don't know how that'd work, but..."  
  
"Just mates. No bond. Together, in the cottage." Fawnlock explained, looking back at John once more.   
  
Doelly was in silence, reading the atmosphere around them as the pair spoke to one another. Though she couldn't understand what was being said, she understood there was a connection between them. Fawnlock and an inukom. Doelly never would have believed it if she hadn't seen it with her eyes.  
  
 _Mates_. Another word that had multiple implications. Did Fawnlock mean mates as in friends, or literally as mates? Well, he had used the word 'bond' as well, which John had learned from experience did _not_ mean what he thought it meant. Now he really wished they could have brought all this up earlier, if only so that he didn't have to feel Doelly's confused and shocked eyes on them. "Is that why you want to rebel?"  
  
"Yes." Fawnlock admitted.  
  
"Why didn't you mention this sooner?" John felt like he had to ask. "When we didn't have your... designated mate looking at us - well, me - like I'm a freak?"  
  
"I did not know... how you would react." Fawnlock explained.   
  
Doelly didn't know what was going on, but she felt as though she was intruding. " _F- Fawnlock? I can return for you later. But we must leave before the sunlight disappears._ " She told him.   
  
Fawnlock released Doelly and turned to her. " _You may go, but not far, do you understand?_ " He asked. Fawnlock watched her nod and begin to slink away.  
  
John developed a sad expression once Doelly went away, and looked at Fawnlock. "I... I don't know what to say," he admitted. "I mean, I... didn't really think about the, uh, future, if you can call it that. Crap..." He ran a hand through his hair. "God, if I'd known about this whole mate thing, I wouldn't have- I mean, it's all fine and all, but--"  
  
The more John spoke, the more Fawnlock began to assume the worst. Was it too much to ask? To stay by John's side for the rest of his life? Did he regret taking him in? Fawnlock felt his heart being ripped to pieces. "John... likes Fawnlock."  
  
"Yes! Yes, I do," John responded, possibly far too quickly. He bit his lip awkwardly and looked down on his feet. "A lot, actually. Way too much for my own good, probably," he added, feeling his cheeks practically burn.  
  
"Then why not?" Fawnlock asked in a serious tone. Even though he could think up a large number of reasons himself.  
  
At that, John smiled, and forced himself to look up at Fawnlock. "I never said no," he mumbled.  
  
Fawnlock blinked at John for a moment. "Then, yes?" He asked with hope lingering in his voice.  
  
John reflected on that for a moment. On one hand, he would be abandoning his 'normal' life for good if they went through with this, and Fawnlock could potentially never go back to his own kind. On the other hand, John had pretty much already abandoned is 'normal' life by coming to this forest in the first place, and Fawnlock didn't _want_ to be with his people. So in a way, it was the perfect compensation. Besides, they practically spent all their time together anyway. His smile widened, "Then, yes."  
  
Upon hearing that, Fawnlock felt his heart leap with joy. He grinned, grabbed a hold of John's shoulders and bent down to nuzzle John yet again. Fawnlock was so happy he felt as though he could fly. Everything was falling into place. All they had to do now was set things straight with the artaldea.  
  
John couldn't resist putting his hands on Fawnlock's upper arms as he nuzzled him back. He supposed it worked like either an embrace or a kiss would have done for him. He honestly didn't know what to think of that. To think that a forest spirit held him in such high regards that it would want a human to be its mate was just... indescribable. "You need to stop being taller than me."  
  
Fawnlock was momentarily confused. How in the world could he stop the growth of his own body? Then Fawnlock realised John must have been joking with him, so he pulled away from John's face and smiled. However, as soon as he pulled away, the gravity of their situation fell upon Fawnlock again, and his face fell. "I must go." He told John.  
  
John reluctantly let go of Fawnlock as well, and was about to tell him to just go and get it over with, but something else entirely came out of his mouth. "Take me with you."  
  
At first, Fawnlock wasn't sure if he had understood that correctly. But there was no way he could have misinterpreted what John had said. His eyes widened as he gained an astonished expression. "Artaldea... will send you to yamahvan. Death. No. John safe. John stay, here." He said.  
  
"Yeah, well, if you don't get your way, you'll be killed," John argued. "And I'm not having any of that rubbish. So it's either both of us, or neither of us."  
  
Fawnlock frowned at John. They had no room to consider not showing up, as the spirits had gods on their sides and there would be no way to out run them. Fawnlock felt as though he had no choice. But he felt it was for the best. They were in this together now. Fawnlock gave him a small nod. "Okay. Go in," he said as he gestured to the cottage, "take what you can. We must arrive at artaldea before the night." Fawnlock told him.  
  
John nodded, not entirely sure what he would be taking from his cottage, and what purpose it would have. If Fawnlock succeeded in his rebellion, they'd come back, and if he didn't, they'd die. But he still did as he was told, gesturing for Fawnlock to stay put as he walked away. "Wait here, I'll be right back."  
  
Fawnlock watched as John went inside the cottage. He had many mixed emotions at the time. But mostly Fawnlock was happy that John had agreed to be with him, and scared about what would happen once they arrived in the spirit realm. Besides the time when they had spoken Moosecroft, no inukom had been in the spirit realm for decades. What was worse was that Moosecroft still held a great influence over their people, and their views of the inukom.   
  
From a corner of the forest, Doelly peered out and walked towards Fawnlock when she was sure John was gone. " _Your scent is different now. You smell like the inukom_." She stated more as an observation than anything else.   
  
" _The inukom has a name_ ," Fawnlock pointed out with a bit of force, " _It's John. And I like the way he smells._ "   
  
" _Oh. Well. That's nice_." Doelly said with a slight blush on her cheeks. She paused to fidget with her feet nervously. " _Do... Do you like my- my scent, at all?_ " She asked as though she were afraid to hear the answer. As far as she was concerned, they were mates who were destined to be together. But there was something about the way Fawnlock treated the inukom- John, that didn't quite sit well with her.   
  
Fawnlock turned towards Doelly. While she did have a wonderful air about her, Fawnlock knew he was only drawn to it through magic and heldua. It was natural; but it wasn't what he wanted. " _No. I don't. I only want to be with John and his scent_." He told her blatantly.   
  
Doelly's eyes grew wider. " _A- An inukom? You- you want to be with an inukom?_ " She exclaimed.   
  
" _I keep telling you, his name is John_." Fawnlock bit out, growing agitated.   
  
" _His? It's- a he? How... N- never mind... Fawnlock, you can't do this_." Doelly told him.   
  
" _I can, and I will. We will find a way_." Fawnlock said.   
  
" _What about me? What am I to do, Fawnlock?_ " Doelly asked in a strained voice. " _You and I were paired at birth. What will become of me if you decide to remain with this inukom?_ "   
  
At that, Fawnlock didn't answer. He couldn't because he honestly had no idea. Fawnlock hadn't thought about it entirely. He assumed they would let her go and pair with someone else. But now he wasn't so sure. " _I... I don't know_." He said.   
  
" _What happened, Fawnlock? I- I knew you were fierce, but I never thought you would be so undisciplined and selfish!_ " She said, with fire behind her words and tears behind her eyes.  
  
John hadn't a clue what to take from the cottage, so he settled on a bunch of random things. A blanket (Fawnlock's favourite), a scarf and a pair of mittens, a box of cookies he had made the day before (might as well, right?), and stuff like that. He stuffed everything in a bag and got outside, eyeing his garden. He figured that if there was at least one thing before he was sentenced to death, it was to give Moosecroft - and possibly the father - a good offering. So he did that as well.   
  
When he assumed he was done (again, he had no idea what he was supposed to take with him), he walked back over to where Fawnlock had been, only to see him talking with Doelly. Except they weren't talking as much as they were shouting. Then and only then did the severity of the situation dawn on John. If someone as shy and timid as Doelly was getting so fierce and defensive about all this, then their people, and Fawnlock's father, would never accept this. He looked on at the two, trying to hear what was being said without imposing or interrupting.  
  
Fawnlock noted John's presence, and flushed deeply as he returned his gaze to Doelly. " _Are you insulting me? I am still royalty. I am above you_." He growled.   
  
" _You say you are royalty, and yet you do not want our way of life. You- you want the protection of your father's blood, and yet you turn your back to us. For years, and years you wandered from us. From- from me. As far as I can see, you do not deserve to be any part of the royals._ " Doelly told him.  
  
John could tell that things were about to get heated, but as far as he was concerned, there was little to nothing he could do about it. He did approach the two of them, though, but took slow, shy steps, knowing that he was very unwanted of at least one party.  
  
For a moment, Fawnlock was completely silent. He didn't know what to say. So Doelly continued to speak. " _All my life, I had been told that I would be your mate. It- it was the one thing I was sure of. And then this- this rebelliousness consumed you._ " Doelly said with her tears flowing freely now. " _And- what has it brought you?_ " She asked.   
  
" _It led me to_ John." Fawnlock said immediately.  
  
Now John wanted to cut in. Say something to either set things straight, or to set them right, somehow. But he didn't know the language, and Doelly wouldn't be able to understand him, and she seemed to hate him anyway. So the only thing he could think of was to take a hesitant step towards the two, and say: "Doelly?"  
  
At the sound of her name, Doelly jumped a little and turned to John. Fawnlock also looked to John, wondering what he was going to try and say.  
  
After a brief moment of damning himself for not having learned more of Fawnlock's language, John decided to try and convey the meaning through emotion. He looked directly at Doelly, looking just as full of guilt as he felt, and uttered: "I'm sorry."  
  
Because Doelly was looking directly at John, she was able to tell what he meant. An apology. For Fawnlock? If that was the case, she didn't want to accept it. Not from Fawnlock's inukom. "S... Sorry?" She asked, not because she misunderstood, but because she wanted a reason.  
  
"Yes," John said with a nod. "I'm sorry, for me," he gestured to himself, "for everything," he made a wave around himself and them, trying to convey what he meant.  
  
Doelly blinked for a moment before turning to Fawnlock. " _Why should this inukom feel apologetic for your actions?_ " She asked him. Fawnlock was rendered speechless, except for the garbled noises coming from his mouth as he searched for an answer. " _I will lead you to the artaldea, but only so they may help you see some reason_." Doelly told him firmly.   
  
" _I will not change my mind_." Fawnlock said when he found his voice.   
  
Doelly only glared at Fawnlock before turning around and back into the forest. Fawnlock gave a fustrated sigh in her direction before giving a side-glance at John. "Doelly... still angry at Fawnlock." He told him.  
  
"Well, yeah, obviously," John sighed. "Been destined since birth to be your mate? I'd be pretty peeved too." He bit his lip and took in a deep breath. "Is there anything I can do? A word, a gesture, an offering, anything? To make things better with her?"  
  
"No. I must make amends." Fawnlock told him before following Doelly into the forest.  
  
"So... should I stay behind, then? While you work things out?" John asked. "Or are we going straight to the whole rebelling business?"  
  
"Come." Fawnlock said simply.  
  
With a small nod, John complied. "Okay, but if she starts having a fit, then one of us has to shut her up. Because my decision is final."  
  
"Mine, too." Fawnlock reassured John. Together, the three of them walked through the forest with Doelly as a guide. Though, because she was angry, it was difficult to keep up with her fast pace. And if Fawnlock was struggling, he couldn't imagine what it was like for John. He glanced back John, noting how winded he looked already. Then Fawnlock caught Doelly by the wrist. " _Slow down. I understand you're upset, but it's hard to follow you._ " He told her.   
  
" _You mean it's hard for the Inukom_." Doelly hissed as she turned away to walk again.   
  
John had always prided himself in being able to carry heavy loads for a large amount of time without growing tired. But the two spirits were faster navigators than he was. He had never hiked far, or in this king of terrain. So he found himself falling behind a bit, though blamed it more on himself than on Doelly. She was angry, which was understandable, and probably knew her way around the forest much better than he did anyway.   
  
Fawnlock turned to look apologetically at John, but he looked back with an equally apologetic look, and mouthed, _it's okay_.  
  
The prince turned around and tried to follow Doelly's path. She only stopped for a brief moment so the two of them could catch up a little. Doelly huffed a little, " _At this rate, we will not make it by nightfall. You should have left it behind_." Doelly told Fawnlock, nodding in John's direction.   
  
" _You're wrong. I need him_." Fawnlock snapped as he drew closer to Doelly. " _We will make this work_. _And he will come with us, even if it takes us days to get there._ "   
  
Doelly shook her head and continued through the forest. Fawnlock understood some of where Doelly's frustration was coming from, but he began to think there was something more to her anger. Perhaps it was prejudice, or some underlying hatred for inukom. Whatever the case, Fawnlock didn't like the hostility coming from Doelly, who was- from his experience- normally a very timid and kind.   
  
Fawnlock spoke over his shoulder to John. "Doelly says we might not get to artaldea in time."  
  
"Oh, hell," John sighed. Now he was really starting to feel like a burden; which, in a way, he was anyway. He tried to pick up the pace, but ultimately couldn't go much faster than before, not only because he was carrying various items, but because his feet kept getting tangled up in random vines and dead branches on the ground. God he felt pathetic. The sudden ache in his shoulder didn't help.   
  
But whatever the case, he carried on, and was at least able to catch up to Fawnlock in the end. Doelly was still further ahead. John panted for a second, momentarily making a mental note to work on his apparently lost cardio wherever he went when he died. Or if he survived. Either way, this was just embarrassing. "Alright, just... keep moving. I don't want to make you guys late..."  
  
Fawnlock only chose to nod in response. He continued to follow Doelly, who was now leading them up a steep path. Fawnlock was starting to believe Doelly was leading them on a more difficult path on purpose. And if that was the case, Fawnlock had no idea Doelly had that much attitude. At one point on the hill, she had finally stopped to allow them to catch up with her. She perched herself on a large boulder, looking down on them as the two tried to reach her.   
  
" _Doelly, why are- you treating us- this way?_ " Fawnlock asked in huffs as he climbed higher.   
  
" _I'm only leading the way to the artaldea_." Doelly said. " _Being with the inukom must have made you weak; if you are challenged by such a route._ "   
  
" _Doelly_..." Fawnlock growled.   
  
" _You would like to believe I'm doing this on purpose, wouldn't you? If I were punishing you, I assure you I wouldn't play such childish games with you_." Doelly spat.  
  
John could feel his calf muscles starting to cramp from walking uphill with all this stuff on his back, but kept going anyway. He had to make a better impression of himself than just a weak human going to spirit territory. True, that's what he was, but he could act it out. If he could ignore the shoulder pain (which he had been able to do until now), then surely he would be able to ignore a few strained muscles in his legs. For the time being, at least.   
  
He then heard Doelly raise her voice, and perked up at her and Fawnlock all but shouting at each other again. The fact that Doelly had stopped gave him a better opportunity to catch up, but he found himself inclined to try and hear what they were talking about. Doelly seemed much more passionate, and Fawnlock was irritable but confused. It was almost as if Doelly had another reason for making them take this route than just to prove a point. But because he couldn't understand, he had a hard time figuring out what it could be.  
  
" _Then why- are you angry? This isn't- just about tradition!_ " Fawnlock roared.   
  
" _You're right! It's not about tradition! It's about you going off for years at a time, abandoning your people, only to commit yourself to an inukom!_ " Doelly yelled back. There was a pause before she spoke again. " _But- m- more importantly. It's- It's because I... Because I love you._ " She said, her voice softer this time.   
  
Fawnlock stopped moving altogether, and locked eyes with Doelly. Love. She loved him. " _Love? How... How could you possibly love me? We barely spoke to one another. And yet you say you love me?_ " He asked in disbelief.  
  
Uh-oh, this couldn't be good. If Doelly had just rendered Fawnlock speechless, she must have said something to really stir him. John awkwardly stood to the side, trying not to make himself too noticeable, as this was obviously a very touchy topic, whatever it was.  
  
Doelly looked away from Fawnlock with a look of disappointment on her features. " _I... I've always admired you. Not to say that I agreed with everything you said or did. But I admired your bravery. While you were out in the inukom realm, I was stuck. I was left, alone._ " She explained. At that moment, she looked back at Fawnlock, " _Do you even understand what this means to me? I had nothing. Being with you meant everything. I have nothing, now._ "   
  
Now it was Fawnlock who couldn't bare to look at her. He understood what Doelly was feeling. " _I am sorry. Forgive me_." Fawnlock murmured.   
  
Doelly only turned away from Fawnlock, so that they would be able to continue their journey. Fawnlock followed in pure silence, unsure of what else to say or do. He should have known better. Since birth, the females in the artaldea were told that their mates were everything. He felt as though he had let Doelly down.  
  
John felt as though he would be able to literally cut through the tension if he had brought his knife. He definitely didn't want to pry, but he had a feeling that he had somehow been the cause of most of this. Or, at least, been a major contributor. He followed the two spirits, now noticing a vast difference in both their stances. Doelly was less fierce and more tense as she walked, and her pace wasn't as fast as before. Meanwhile, Fawnlock was looking sadder and more conflicted with himself than John had ever seen him. He honestly didn't know what to do. Nothing he would say would ever count, and whatever he did would simply be brushed off as pitiful attempts at making amends.   
  
Eventually, he thought of something he hadn't really considered before now. "Fawnlock?" he began. "What... I mean, whatever comes out of this, whether we live or die, what'll happen to her?"  
  
Fawnlock glanced at John when he spoke, but paused before he responded. "I... do not know. Maybe... same fate as us. Once artaldea chooses." He said.  
  
It was then that John realised just how selfish he was. Or rather, how they both were. On John's part, he hadn't considered Fawnlock's what-if situation with the Artaldea, and just assumed that he would be able to stay with him forever. On Fawnlock's, he hadn't thought about Doelly's position and what would become of her. For a moment, John actually found the death penalty to be the better option. "So... there's no way she could... I dunno, choose a new mate or something?" he asked, and then immediately wanted to punch himself for having even thought it.  
  
For a moment, Fawnlock was silent. He swallowed a bit and then spoke, "Even so... Doelly... Doelly likes Fawnlock." He told John.  
  
Oh. Well, that was understandable, sort of. At least from Doelly's perspective, John could see why such a rejection would upset her so much if she-- No. No, this was much more than that. Fawnlock just didn't know the word for it. So John decided to teach him. "Do you mean... She loves you?"  
  
Fawnlock blinked a little, momentarily confused as he confronted the new word. "Lo- Love..." He said, just to hear it come from his own mouth. He wondered how much the word varied from 'likes'. After a moment Fawnlock nodded. "Yes."  
  
John dipped his head, but quickly looked up again as he found that it only made him more aware of his muscle strains. "Well. That complicates things a bit," he said sarcastically. "Is there anything we can do? That _I_ can do?"  
  
"I do not know." Fawnlock admitted. He had no idea how to fix any part of this. Not yet, anyway.   
  
There came a point in the journey where the sun was beginning to set. They had travelled long and hard, but Doelly said they still had a ways to go. It was dusk when Doelly stopped in her tracks, frozen. Fawnlock stopped as well and twitched his ears, hoping to understand just why Doelly had stopped. He couldn't hear or smell anything, so he became quickly confused. " _What's wrong?_ " He asked. Doelly didn't answer.  
  
When John saw the spirits halt, he started to get worried. Had they reached their deadline? Was it too late for them to do anything now? Even Fawnlock looked puzzled, and that alone was worrisome. John swallowed and then approached him. "Fawnlock? What's going on?"  
  
Doelly shook her head and looked at Fawnlock. " _I thought I smelt something nearby. It was probably nothing._ " She assured Fawnlock. " _We should find shelter, though. We're not travelling at night through this part of the forest._ "   
  
At that, Fawnlock nodded and turned to John. "Doelly says we stop to rest." He told him.  
  
John bit back his breath of 'Thank God!' in favour of asking: "Stop? Aren't we supposed to reach the group before nightfall?"  
  
"Yes, but we will not make it. And we cannot go through this path at night." Fawnlock explained.  
  
John looked on, and although he was no expert about forests or thickets or anything of the like, he couldn't see any difference between this part of the forest and the one they had just trekked through. The trees were a bit taller, yes, and there were more hazardous vines and branches on the ground, but that was about it. "Why not?" he asked, almost feeling stupid for saying it.  
  
Fawnlock took a look around as though there were others watching. "This part... belongs to a voji. But not friend. He is powerful. And he walks the night." He explained.  
  
"'Belongs to'? I thought you were the ones who ruled over the forest," John commented, now very confused. "Is it a rebel or something?"  
  
"Different. He is not our kind. Each voji, different. Doelly, Fawnlock, are Harina. Different voji for different parts." Fawnlock struggled to explain. "I will tell you, more later." He assured John.   
  
Meanwhile, Doelly was scoping the land just off of the beaten path. The closer towards the river, the more likely they would find a cave. So she allowed her nose to guide her in that direction. She gestured for the two of them to follow her as she stepped off the path.  
  
John nodded at Fawnlock's explanation, and then noticed Doelly's trying to get their attention. He promptly went to follow, wincing a bit as he felt his legs protesting. "Okay. Well, come on. Don't want to keep her waiting," he said plainly.  
  
Fawnlock followed as Doelly lead them to the river. The smell filled his senses before the sound ever reached his ears. Fawnlock enjoyed the water. Once they found the river, they set out to find a cave or some kind of shelter to protect them. Along the way, Fawnlock and Doelly gathered leaves and branches from the forest floor. They managed to find a cave between a few larger boulders. They would have missed it if Fawnlock hadn't jumped down to the shore of the river and pulled aside a large tree branch that still held a few leaves on it. Once they were inside, Fawnlock and Doelly put down the leaves on the floor of the cave.  
  
The only thing John could really do was to stand by and watch as the spirits prepared their resting area. He was still a bit skeptical about this new spirit he'd never heard of, but brushed it aside for now. He rid himself of his baggage once he was inside the cave, relieved finally to be free of it. He rolled his bad shoulder a bit after doing so, and stretched his calves.  
  
Fawnlock noticed this as he was placing the leaves down. He raised a hand and tilted his head a bit. "Fawnlock heal John?" He offered.  
  
John perked at that, and smiled, feeling a small heat in his cheeks. "Um... If only for the muscle strains, then sure," he replied sheepishly, not sure if he wanted Fawnlock to know about his shoulder just yet.  
  
The spirit nodded and set down the rest of his leaves. Doelly's eyes flickered back and forth between the two, before she also let go of her leaves. " _I will try to find us food._ " She told Fawnlock before leaving them.   
  
Fawnlock only looked after her as she walked out of the mouth of the cave. He looked back at John, "Doelly finding food. Lay down." He told John as he gestured to the bed of leaves.  
  
John was quick to comply, and somewhat stiffly lay down on the leaves. As soon as he was down, he noticed how tired he was from the, well, there was no other word for it; hiking. Perhaps he had been settled down for too long. He made another mental note; not just work on cardio, but on overall motion besides the garden. He closed his eyes, almost feeling like he deserved to at this point.  
  
Kneeling beside John, Fawnlock reached for his legs first. His hands glowed a bright green, lighting up the cave walls around them. He placed them on top of each leg for a good portion of time. Though he only had his hands on John's legs, Fawnlock's powers reached all corners of his body. From beneath the leaves, a few strands of grass grew; surrounding John's body. Once he was done he took his hands away and looked to John. "John, okay?" He asked.  
  
The magic was much more intense than it had ever been. The glow was brighter, the effect stronger, and the feeling much more relaxing than before. John looked around himself, noticing the effect the magic had had on his surroundings. He turned back to Fawnlock after a few seconds, trying to stifle a proud grin. "Yeah, I'm great. Thank you," he said. "Was there... something different about this whole thing, or is it just me?"  
  
"Heldua makes magic stronger." Fawnlock explained with a small smile.  
  
John let his grin fully form on his face, finally seeing another good element in this whole maturing stage. "So if I have a nightmare fit, you won't exhaust yourself in trying to make me better?" he asked smugly.  
  
Fawnlock might have looked away, but his smile formed into a small grin. "No. I do not think so."  
  
"I'll try my best to cooperate too," John continued. "Which'll probably be a bit difficult, since we've kind of forgotten to eat today. Ah well, think I'll survive another night."  
  
The smile on Fawnlock’s face disappeared slowly. "If voji does not find cave." He said.  
  
John shrugged. "True. But even if it doesn't, I'll probably be more of a burden tomorrow. Because I _really_ don't think Doelly's going to provide me with any kind of food."  
  
"Doelly will. Doelly, angry, but she is not... cruel." Fawnlock assured him.  
  
"I'll take your word for it," John said as he allowed himself to close his eyes again, and fully relax atop the leaves. "So what's the deal about the other spirit? Is it dangerous or something?"  
  
Fawnlock chose to lay down next to John, figuring out how to answer his questions. "Yes..." He said before launching into a deeper explanation. "The world is... made of five realms. Layers. We are a part of inukom, now. Below inukom is yamahvan. Death. Some voji... are able to cross into both. Those, powerful enough. This voji is."  
  
"So it... crosses from death to here?" John asked, not sure if he wanted to hear an answer to that question. "Like... like a demon or something?"  
  
"Yes. Demon, are corrupt voji. You have, almost seen it happen before." Fawnlock told him.  
  
"I have?" John perked, and opened one eye to take a peek at Fawnlock, and was very happy to see him lying beside him. "When? How? What was it? And why 'almost'?"  
  
"Moosecroft." Fawnlock said simply. "He was full of hate. Then, you spoke to him. Almost, because we would be dead, by now." He explained. "Most voji, fall into hate. Allow it to... consume them. Then become demon."  
  
John let out a large breath. "Wow... And does anyone know why this one is so dangerous? Or why he became one in the first place?"  
  
"No. Some say, he chose to become demon. There are, stories, but no proof." Fawnlock said.  
  
"Mmm... Guessing he rebelled somehow," John said and then yawned despite himself. "Or, y'know, broke the law, or something." The more he lay there, the more tired he got. He wanted to turn to his side and wrap around Fawnlock, but decided against it.  
  
"He is not our kind." Fawnlock told him pointedly, "He is Vouk. We are Harina. Different parts of forest, belong to different voji." He explained.  
  
"Oh right, sorry, yeah, you already said that," John mumbled. He then stretched most of his body and, despite his previous thoughts, did end up on his side, coming face to face with the spirit. He didn't feel inclined to turn away. "We keep running into more death traps as the day progresses. That can't be normal," he said with a small grin.  
  
"That is, life in the forest. Even voji have things to hide from." Fawnlock told him softly. Because he was so close to John, his scent was intoxicating. "But I am not afraid. Not with John." He said as he placed a tentative hand on top of John's.  
  
As soon as Fawnlock touched his hand, John turned his so that the palm faced upwards, and laced his fingers with the spirit's. He wasn't sure if it was pure emotion, the fact that the hand was furry, or magic, but either way, he felt warmth spread through him, all the way to his very core. He squeezed Fawnlock's hand in a reassuring way, his grin morphing into a fond smile. "Me neither," he told the spirit. "Besides, we're in this together, yeah?"  
  
Fawnlock smiled back at John and nodded a little. "Yes." He said.

Without a second thought, Fawnlock drew closer to nuzzle John once more. John simply had to mirror the nuzzling again, feeling like he was getting the hang of it now. Once the spirit was done, though, he didn't pull back too far away. Fawnlock was so close he could feel John's breath. It was comforting to have him so close. And now that he was of age, it was a relief to know he wasn't being watched. Moments like these were John and his to treasure. John felt a small wave of relief when he noticed that Fawnlock didn't draw too far back, and sighed contentedly.

And then he simply had to ask, "What does that mean?"  
  
"It means... many things. It is a greeting and a telling of like, love. Fondness." Fawnlock answered as he felt a slight heat in his face.  
  
The way Fawnlock was stumbling over his words was just so adorable to listen to. He smiled at the spirit, equally red in the face. "You want to know how I'd express fondness?"  
  
Fawnlock grew curious and a bit excited when he heard that. "Yes." He said with an eager nod.  
  
Without hesitation, John cupped Fawnlock's jaw with his free hand and brought him downwards a bit so he could plant a small, chaste kiss on his forehead.  
  
The touch was unexpected and the idea of it was completely foreign, but it felt good. The moment it happened, Fawnlock felt as though he was lighter than air. A rush of excitement went through him, as he was eager to do the same.  
  
John drew back slightly, feeling like his cheeks were ready to burn right off his face. He still kept his hand on Fawnlock's jaw, and used his other one to squeeze the spirit's hand again. "Kinda weird, I know. But it's all I've got apart from hugs," he said rather sheepishly.  
  
"I like it." Fawnlock told John with a grin.  
  
"Good, because now I'll probably be doing it a lot," John said amusedly. "At least while we're still alive. And Doelly isn't around," he added before planting another kiss to the spirit's forehead. It seemed like an ideal place, really.  
  
Fawnlock couldn't help but continue to grin and squirm a little at the touch. He was almost disappointed that he had never experienced this before. But the feeling edged away quickly as he realised that no other voji would have this privilege. It was something for John and himself to share. When John pulled away again, Fawnlock mirrored John's actions and pressed his lips on John's forehead as well.  
  
Wow, the spirit caught on fast. Despite his whole face feeling like it was on fire, John managed to chuckle. He inched closer to Fawnlock, and snuggled up close to him. "You're impossible, d'you know that?" he said contentedly.  
  
Fawnlock pulled his lips away from John and licked them curiously. He was fascinated with the taste. "You taste... same as your scent." He murmured in awe. "Sweet."  
  
If it was even physically possible, John blushed even deeper. "Uh... Is- is that... bad, or good?" he asked, feeling very stupid for having said that in the first place.  
  
"Good. Very good." Fawnlock told him with a smile.  
  
John's smile widened, and he sighed in relief, despite himself. Because of course sweet would be good. The thing was addicted to sugar beets, after all. John lowered his hand from Fawnlock's jaw and wrapped his arm around him. "Wish things didn't have to be so complicated," he murmured. "And hey, if this all works out, maybe I'll show you how to, um... do that properly. If you want."  
  
Fawnlock tilted his head a little in mild confusion, but decided to agree to his promise anyways. "Yes."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all of your support! Every comment, kudo and bookmark is extremely appreciated.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jealousy is a very harmful poison.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's an early update since I won't be near my laptop until very late Saturday. I hope you enjoy it!

In the forest, Doelly was busying herself, trying to find food in their surroundings. The forest was growing darker by the minute, which worried her a little, but she was confident that she would be able to find something soon. So she searched along side the river and especially among the bushes and the forest floor.   
  
Doelly was able to find some nuts from the trees above, so she gathered them up. Before long, she noticed she had strayed a bit from the path. But she hadn't lost the scent of the rivier, so continued to collect a few berries from the bushes. Suddenly another scent clouded her mind, which caused her to slow her actions. Then she froze altogether when she heard the sound of a twig snapping behind her. Doelly's heart rose to her throat in a panic. Another voji was in her presence.  
  
Over the years, one of the major elements he had learned about the other spirits was that they matched their animal counterparts perfectly in terms of paranoia and sense of hearing. He thought he had mastered the stealth needed, but apparently their instincts still kicked in when their surroundings weren't familiar. Now that he had been found out, though, there was no point in trying to hide from her anymore. He could tell she was panicking, and would no doubt try to run away as soon as he revealed himself, but he did so anyway. After all, the females were rarely very smart around these parts.   
  
" _Alright_ ," he said as he walked out of the bushes, his hands in the air and his face down as if swearing defeat. " _I'll admit, that was rather clumsy of me. I was going to sneak up on you, but apparently, you deer voji have much better hearing than I do_."  
  
The moment Doelly heard his voice, it caused her to shiver in fear. She felt as though a cold wind had swept around her. Her instinct was to run away immediately, but she knew she would be no match for the wolf if she tried to out run him. So she remained frozen, quivering in fear. Doelly watched his every move, taking in small shaky breaths, left only wondering when he would strike. " _W- who are you?_ " She asked, despite her growing fear.  
  
The wolf smirked. " _Oh, I'm sorry, I'm forgetting all about formalities_ ," he said and then bowed so low that it was obvious he was mocking Doelly and her kind's manners. " _The name's_ _Wolfiarty._ " He looked up from his bow, a sinister grin on his face. " _Hiii._ "  
  
The sound of his voice made Doelly extremely uncomfortable. Not only that, but she recognized the name instantly. Wolfiarty was a demon with unimaginable power. His influence reached across the entire land. Everything dark and evil lead back to Wolfiarty. " _What do you want from me?_ " Doelly asked.  
  
Wolfiarty stood back up again, and looked as though he was thinking things over. " _Nothing that would inconvenience you, I'm guessing_ ," he replied, his voice a low drawl. " _Of course, you are sort of on my territory, and that just won't do_."  
  
" _W- we-- I was just, passing through. I will leave at once, I won't breathe a word of our meeting I promise_." Doelly told him, her nerves getting the better of her.  
  
" _Whaaaat? But you only just got here_ ," Wolfiarty whined. " _And getting along so well, too. Oh well. At least now I know there's more of you to go around, what with the 'we' and all..._ "  
  
" _Please, no_." Doelly said, her voice sounding panicked, " _Don't- don't... I'll do whatever you want. Just don't hurt him. I'll do anything, I swear, just don't hurt Fawn--_ " She clamped her mouth tight with her own hand, cursing inwardly at her weakness.  
  
Instantly, Wolfiarty's ears perked and his eyes widened. " _Ooooh! You're travelling with the prince? How fascinating..._ " he said deviously.  
  
Doelly didn't like the sound of his tone at all. She grew more fearful of what would happen if she did not appease the wolf demon. " _Please, I will do anything for you_ ," She expressed as she fell to her knees to beg. " _There's nothing in any of the five realms I wouldn't do in order to save his life. Take anything you want. Take me, take the inukom that he cherishes, but spare him. He is my prince, before he is my mate._ "  
  
Wolfiarty chuckled giddily. " _Oh my, this just keeps getting better!_ " he breathed, seemingly more to himself than Doelly. " _The prince is your mate, and he doesn't even want you? And cherishes an inukom? Yet you're still willing to die for him?_ " He let out a high-pitched laugh. " _How amazingly tragic_."  
  
Doelly grew chills and fought back the tears in her eyes, in order to continue to look strong in front of the demon. " _Please, tell me; what must I do in order for you to spare his life?_ " She asked. She knew he desired power, and thus she assumed he would kill the prince to obtain it.  
  
" _Dear me, who ever said anything about taking the prince's life?_ " Wolfiarty smugly pointed out. " _I'm just saying, it's rather sad that you're destined to be with the royal Fawnlock, and he tosses you over for a--_ " He snorted. " _An inukom._ "  
  
" _T- the prince should be with whomever he pleases_." Doelly told him, though she did not believe it for one second.  
  
" _But we both know that's not how you feel_ ," Wolfiarty said as he took a few steps closer to Doelly, and circled around her. " _Now, is it?_ "  
  
Doelly remained silent as she tore her eyes off of Wolfiarty and looked to the forest floor. She wasn't sure if it was the demon's influence, but she began to feel sick to her stomach. A flare of jealousy rose up from deep inside her. Doelly tried to swallow it down, but it wouldn't go away. " _N- no_." She admitted with a whisper, despite herself.  
  
Wolfiarty inched even closer, now practically breathing into Doelly's ear. " _And the inukom, well, it just keeps getting in your way, doesn't it?_ " he growled. " _We can't have that_."  
  
" _W- what do I do?_ " Doelly asked, her tears flowing angrily. _"I- I love him but--_ " She choked out.  
  
" _But, nothing!_ " Wolfiarty cut in. " _The prince is your mate, and if he starts to try and run off with an inukom instead of his destined, there's no telling what could happen_." He circled Doelly once more and then positioned himself in front of her. " _You know you're thinking exactly what I am._ "  
  
Doelly placed her hands over her face. She couldn't stand the thought. If she did, there was no doubt she would become corrupt like Wolfiarty. Doelly didn't want to become a demon. It frightened her even more. " _N- no._ "  
  
Wolfiarty pouted, and leaned into Doelly even more. " _Aw, come oooon. Not even a teeny, tiny bit?_ " he said in a somewhat playful voice.  
  
" _I can't_." Doelly told him through her hands.  
  
" _That's no fun_ ," Wolfiarty complained. " _And here I was prepared to do all the dirty work for you and everything_." He shrugged and turned from Doelly, strutting away. " _Ah, well, your loss. Enjoy always being second best and least loved._ "  
  
Upon hearing that, Doelly lifted her head out of her hands and looked after Wolfiarty. " _W- wait!_ " She called to him. " _... What do I do?_ " Doelly asked quietly.  
  
Wolfiarty stopped in his tracks, his grin turning even more wicked by the second. He wiped it off as he turned back to Doelly and smiled instead. " _Nothing too much, so don't worry your pretty little head_ ," he told her. " _All I ask, is that you lead me to your realm. And that's all. You do that, and I'll dispose of the inukom, in any way you like._ "  
  
Doelly wiped the tears from her eyes and nodded. " _Alright. I'll do it. Just don’t take the inukom’s life. All I want is for him to be gone_." She told him.  
  
" _Oh, I'll make sure of that_ ," Wolfiarty reassured. " _And maybe for good measure, I could even wipe the prince's memory of having ever encountered it. How does that sound?_ "  
  
Doelly's eyes widened and brightened. She was impressed, as she didn't know the demon had that kind of power. " _Thank you_." She said with a slight bow of her head.  
  
" _Ah, ah, ah,_ " Wolfiarty sang as he used one finger to lift Doelly's chin back up. " _We're having none of that now. Just your gratitude is more than enough. But rememberrrrr! You have to lead me to your realm, or you might have to settle with the inukom forever_."  
  
As Doelly nodded, she felt Wolfiarty's claw dig slightly into her skin. " _I will. If you walk with us at a distance and against the wind, Fawnlock will never be the wiser. I'm sure you don't need me to tell you to mask your scent as well._ "  
  
Wolfiarty smiled, and stepped away from Doelly. " _Not a problem,_ " he said simply. " _And as soon as we reach the realm, I assure you, the inukom will no longer be a problem_."  
  
For a moment something inside Doelly clicked. Never before had she felt so pleased to be so mischievous. As Wolfiarty smiled, so did she. And it felt completely natural to do so.  
  
\--  
  
It wasn't until he stirred that John realised he must have dozed off while waiting for Doelly to come back. She still hadn't shown, which was kind of surprising, but John didn't mind. Just like the morning before, he found himself wrapped in a cuddle with Fawnlock, who seemed to have been studying him as John had nodded off.

While it was a bit uncomfortable knowing that the spirit had watched him sleep, John thought nothing of it, and instead just looked up at Fawnlock with a smile. "No nightmares yet, I hope," he said, his voice hoarse from drowsiness.  
  
"No." Fawnlock answered with a small smile of his own. He placed a hand on the side of John's face. He was happy and content to be with John in this moment. So much, he wished it would never end. But he knew that they would have to fight in order to gain more of these moments. And he had confidence that they would get exactly what they wanted. Even if Fawnlock had to die trying.   
  
At that very moment, Fawnlock heard footsteps edging closer to the mouth of the cave. His ear twitched slightly and he quickly pulled himself away from John, ready to strike anything that entered. The abrupt movement startled John for a second, and he wondered if Fawnlock had seen anything sinister.

The tension died instantly when Doelly revealed herself, carrying berries and nuts in her arms. " _S- sorry it took so long_." Doelly told him as she approached them.   
  
" _It's alright._ " Fawnlock said. He watched Doelly crouch down to the bundle of leaves, and place her findings on top of them. " _Thank you, Doelly_." He said with a slight nod. She nodded back mutely in response.  
  
When it was clear that it had simply been Doelly, John calmed down. He looked over at what she had brought, and for a moment thought that perhaps he should stay away from the food to begin with. So he simply lay on the leaves and tried to sleep again.  
  
Fawnlock observed this, but his stomach spoke louder than his initial concern for John. He reached for the berries first and took them in handfuls. Doelly only sat nearby on her knees, and allowed Fawnlock to eat. Once he had consumed a fair amount, he looked to John. "John want food?" He asked as he gestured a handful of berries in his direction.  
  
John looked over to Fawnlock, and then decided to sit up. He duly noted that his muscles weren't sore, as he had expected, and silently thanked whatever deity had brought Fawnlock to him in the first place. "If it's alright," he said, nodding over to Doelly, who looked as though she was trying to contain some kind of emotion.

Fawnlock barely cast a look in Doelly's direction. "Doelly knows tradition; royalty eat first. I do not follow tradition." He explained before making the same gesture yet again.

"So I've noticed," John said with a small grin as he took a few berries from Fawnlock's palm. "And for that, you're a royal pain."

A smirk formed on Fawnlock's face when he heard that. It quickly faded when Doelly let out a slight gasp after she saw John take the berries. " _B- but, my prince--"_ She began.

Fawnlock only had to look in her direction, and she snapped her mouth shut. " _My John will eat when I say so. Is that understood?_ " He asked. With an expression full of pain and shame, Doelly nodded. " _Now, you should eat as well. We all need our strength._ " Fawnlock told her.

Again, Doelly nodded and took some of the nuts and berries. " _Yes, of course._ "

"You don't have to be so sharp with her," John whispered in Fawnlock's direction. He would have felt guiltier than he did if Doelly hadn't expressed her hatred of him so plainly. Still, he knew there were traditions and customs.

Fawnlock frowned slightly at John. "If Doelly had a choice, John would be outside cave. Unable to share same food with Fawnlock." He told him.

John raised his eyebrows. "Wow..." he breathed. "You guys are really strict about this whole mating thing, huh?"

"Yes." Fawnlock replied before eating a few more berries.

Having finished most of what Fawnlock had given him, John let out a small sigh. "I'm starting to wish you didn't have all these rules," he commented. "That way none of us would be miserable."

"I wish as well. Rules were given to us ages ago, when the voji were separating the lands. Long before my time. I see no, use of them now." Fawnlock said. "The artaldea is full of life, yet they still stay with tradition because the forest grows small."

"Small, how?" John asked. "Like, literally small? As in, dying or being chopped, or what?"

"Cut, yes. Your people have not made, things easy." Fawnlock admitted.

"You should've told me earlier," John said, looking down on the ground. "Maybe I could've helped out. Planted trees instead of just focusing on that bloody garden."

Fawnlock sensed John's unwarranted guilt; after all, he knew it wasn't John's fault. He could only hope his kind would recognise that. Fawnlock brought a hand to the side of John's face, to draw his attention back to him. "After artaldea, we will plant trees, together." Fawnlock assured him, just before placing his lips on John's forehead again.

As soon as Fawnlock did that, Doelly became both disturbed and confused. She looked away immediately, her face burning upon realising that she was witnessing an intimate moment.

John blushed deeply, and found that he had to take long, deep breaths to contain his rapid heartbeat. He brought his hand to Fawnlock's on his face, and smiled at him. "That's a promise," he said softly.

While Fawnlock smiled back at John, Doelly began to feel sick again. Her jealousy rose from the depths of her being, and clawed at her from the inside. Doelly felt she was the one who deserved to be held in such a manner. After all, Fawnlock was her mate even though they hadn't bonded yet. It was their destiny to be together. Still, Doelly sat in pure silence, knowing that she would have her way soon enough.

\--

Ooh, a hidden cave. That's clever, that's really clever. One of the things Wolfiarty had never been particularly fond of were puzzles, so trying to find some kind of hidden place to stay was never high on his scale of things to do. So for the prince and his mate to settle in there was actually rather genius. He had watched as the female had gone inside with the food, practically drooling with anticipation of what he knew was in there as well.

He had concealed his scent for the most part, and now only smelled like his part of the forest. It could potentially cause some problems when the female would lead him to her territory, but he was confident that the prince would be too focused on the inukom to notice. And he needed that. The cluelessness and naivety of the young prince was something he was going to use to his advantage in his plan. To get to kill the inukom was a pure bonus prize. Wolfiarty grinned and licked his sharp teeth at the thought.

\--  
  
After their meal, the three began to settle down to rest. Doelly was left on her own, the furthest away from John and Fawnlock as possible.

Fawnlock had placed himself beside John, and wrapped a possessive arm around him as they settled in the leaves. "Fawnlock... glad John is here." He told him.

"I'm glad too. Incredibly happy, actually," John said drowsily as he brought his own arm around Fawnlock. He wasn't able to do it quite as firmly as the spirit had, but decided it would have to do for now. "I couldn't just let you run off alone, though. If you wouldn't come back, I'd be wondering forever what had happened to you." He paused, reflecting on the thought that he had planted in his head by saying it. "I would miss you terribly if I didn't know. Or even if I did."

Fawnlock didn't want to think about himself going through this without John. He imagined he wouldn't even have half the strength he felt at that moment. Just John's presence greatly reassured him. "John is here now. That is important."

John smiled, and moved over a bit so that he was firmly able to wrap himself around Fawnlock. "Yeah. And whatever happens, I'll still be there. I'll follow you whatever you do, no matter how stupid it is," he said with a small chuckle.

"Good." Fawnlock said, a smile playing on his own lips.

"I really don't look forward to carrying all that stuff tomorrow, though," John said, nodding towards the pile he had made earlier. "Why'd I have to bring it, anyway?"

Fawnlock paused before he spoke to John. "I do not know how long it will be, until we reach artaldea. Time, energy, different for voji and inukom." He admitted.

John laughed softly. "Then maybe it would've been a bit smarter not to bring anything, so I wouldn't overdo it," he commented with a slight grin. "Just hope the offerings survive, if I can even use them."

"Hope so. Offerings will, help." Fawnlock told him before giving a slight yawn.

"And even if they won't, I'll still let your elders keep them, just because I certainly won't have any use for them if I'm dead," John said nonchalantly and yawned. He stretched for a bit, and as he did so, the hand around Fawnlock came in contact with the spirit's head, and so John absent-mindedly started stroking it like he would a cat's.

At the small touch, the tiredness drained from Fawnlock as he tried to catalogue exactly what was happening. While it was unexpected, Fawnlock allowed John to continue, if only out of curiosity and simply because they had been sharing delicate touches all day. Only when he could feel Fawnlock flick his ears a bit did John realise that perhaps this had been a bit too forward. After all, he had all but violated the first rule of Fawnlock's kind: don't touch unless touched first or prompted. So he was inclined to stop. However, as Fawnlock relaxed against him and leaned into the touch, John felt relieved, and kept going.

Normally, Fawnlock's species did not use such intimate displays of affection. The Harina limited their senses to sight and smell; not touch. His instincts told him to pull away, but Fawnlock didn't want it to stop. He felt as though he had been deprived of water his entire life, and had just found a waterfall. Fawnlock relaxed and even tilted his head into John's touch. John was being careful not to touch the antlers, and simply ran his hands through the spirit's hair for a moment, massaging the scalp. He then dared to move over and do the same thing behind Fawnlock's ears, or at least one at a time, since they were rather far apart. Fawnlock stayed still, but made no indication that he was uncomfortable.

"This alright?" John asked.

When John reached behind Fawnlock's ears, his eyes rolled back into his head and they fluttered closed. Never before had he felt something so pleasurable. Especially when John's fingers traced his fur. He almost hadn't heard John's question. When it registered in his mind, Fawnlock nodded and smiled lazily, "Mmm," he hummed in response before beginning to purr.

John let out a small giggle at Fawnlock's response, and so kept going. "I'll take that as a yes," he said as he moved his hand to massage the back of Fawnlock's head, reveling in the fact that he was actually allowed to do this. "You're going to stink of me if we keep this up."

Fawnlock continued to lean into John's touch. He squirmed a little in delight. "Don't care. Fawnlock likes John's scent." He expressed in a sleepy tone.

The blush that crept into John's cheeks had no business being there after hearing that, but John could still feel it. He continued petting Fawnlock, going up to the ears for a moment before taking a small risk and moving towards his jaw and neck. He then shifted a bit so that he was even closer to the spirit, if that was even physically possible at this point. "You're warm..." was his excuse.

As John made himself more comfortable, Fawnlock found himself melting into his touch. He knew now that his entire kind had everything backwards; although smell gave a great advantage against predators, it was hardly the most intimate sense. How Fawnlock had lived his life prior to this, he wasn't certain. All he knew was that he wanted to continue living every day, if it meant he would fall asleep with John in this way.

John decided that since Fawnlock seemed to like the petting so much, he would continue to do so for as long as he could. Just then, another thought sprung into his mind, and he wanted to ask Fawnlock just one more thing before letting him drift to sleep. "Your kind... I'm guessing they don't, uh, have too many intimate touches like this? Aside from the whole nuzzling thing?" And bonding, he didn't say.

Fawnlock opened his eyes as much as he could to look at John. "Mmmno." He answered slowly. "Your kind?"

"Crave it," John replied with a small smile. "We're social beings. A bit of contact is needed so we don't go completely mad. And a bit of touching helps a lot too." He paused for a second. "Which is why I am going to hug you properly tomorrow." 

When Fawnlock heard that he simply grinned and closed his eyes again. He was able to understand why John's kind needed this. Not only did it keep him warm, but it also made him feel desired and safe. Fawnlock gave a small and contented sigh. "Good." 

"Good," John echoed as his touches became lighter, but he never removed his hand. "Now, g'night, and sleep well. We're going to need all our strength and focus if we're to do this rebelling business properly."

Fawnlock nodded weakly just as he was beginning to drift off to sleep. Because he was so warm, it didn't take him very long to do so. Never before had he felt so content. Except, a cloud of uncertainty hung over his mind, as he wasn't sure how long it would last.

John lightly brushed his fingers against Fawnlock's fur now, feeling from him going completely limp against him that he had fallen asleep. While he had a feeling that their little mission was doomed to failure given Fawnlock's kind's strict customs, he was determined to make the most of what little time they had left. So to properly end the night, he mentally ordered himself not to get any nightmares, and then pressed a light goodnight-kiss on Fawnlock's forehead.

From a few feet away, Doelly lied on the cave floor curled in on herself. Though she couldn’t understand their conversation, she watched her mate twist his limbs around the inukom. Her insides churned at the sight of the inukom touching Fawnlock in such an intimate way. Soon she fell asleep with bitterness swelling inside her heart.

\--

On the next day, Doelly awoke before Fawnlock and the inukom. She had been at the mouth of the cave, which had released more light to shine on her face. Once she had stretched she rose from her makeshift bed and walked out of the cave. Though the sun was out, the dead trees and thorns surrounding the river made things much more ominous.

Doelly crouched near the riverside and used her hands to drink the water.

“ _Well hello there…_ ” A voice sang from behind.

Immediately Doelly choked on the water she was drinking and spun around. When she recovered from her coughing fit, she faced Wolfiarty who was perched on the top of the mouth of the cave. He sat there with a smug smile on his face, and his tail swaying slowly.

“ _What do you want?_ ” Doelly asked, “ _I’ve already given you my word that I would guide you to our realm._ ”

“ _Yes, I know you have._ ” Wolfiarty said, “ _And I realise that you hold a lot of motivation in doing so. I’m just here to clarify a few things. If I am caught before we reach your realm, I won’t hesitate to cut you, the inukom and your precious mate from where you stand. And if I die, there will be nowhere for you to hide. Not even in your sleep. I have an even more powerful voji on my side that would love to tear the skin from your fragile bones. Are we clear?_ ” He asked with a toothy grin.

Every part of Doelly was shaking in absolute fear at Wolfiarty’s words. Still, she nodded in response. “ _Y- yes_.” She said.

“ _Good._ ” Wolfiarty chirped before standing up. “ _I’ll go work on masking my scent, then. I’ll catch you later on the trail._ ” He sang as he walked away.

Doelly only looked after the demon, and felt a sense of dread. Just what had she done?

\--

Fawnlock awoke with the sun peering through the trees and onto his face. He ended up rolling over to escape the glare, and noticed that even though he had moved he was still fairly close to John. Fawnlock smiled at John's sleeping figure, and pulled himself closer again.

Although he probably could have slept much longer, John was awakened by the combined irritation of a blinding light in his face, and some shuffling beside him. He grumbled a bit as he protested with his body waking up, and promptly tried to turn away from the light. He smacked his lips a bit and then closed his eyes again, not feeling like getting up just yet.

Fawnlock continued to observe as John was sleeping, intrigued at the sight. His smile never faded as John readjusted himself for his own comfort. If he could have, he would have watched him all day. And although he knew that was not possible, he dared to watch him for as long as he could.

After a few minutes of being curled up faced from the light and still not being able to get back to sleep, John let out a frustrated grunt and decided to give up. He rolled over two his back, put one hand over his eyes and groaned. "Caves should come with curtains..." he mumbled irritably, "and preferably blinds too. Ugh..."

Though Fawnlock had no clue what John was talking about, he continued to smile. To encourage John to wake up further, he gently rubbed John's shoulder and upper arm. "Morning." He greeted, exactly like John had done when they were in the cottage.

At the sound of the voice, John's demeanour changed completely, and he allowed a grin to spread across his face. He knew he should have been annoyed, but he found that he couldn't stay mad. So he rubbed his eyes with his hand and looked over at Fawnlock. "Good morning," he said drowsily. "How'd you sleep?"

"Good." Fawnlock told him. And it was true; he had slept very well as he was used to cave floors. Granted, he hadn't slept on one in a long while, but he hadn't forgotten the feeling. He was, after all, a spirit of the forest. "You?" He asked.

"Alright," John replied. He didn't feel like telling Fawnlock that he had gotten used to sleeping on hard surfaces in the past, so he left that part out. Still, he was very thankful for the bedding. "Back's a bit stiff, though," he admitted.

Fawnlock held up his hand in front of John and conjured up some magic. "Heal?" He asked.

John shook his head, still smiling. "You're unbelievable," he breathed, and then looked up at Fawnlock. "Sure. Being able to stand up right would be nice."

Now with John's permission, Fawnlock pulled him closer and wrapped an arm around him. He placed his hand in the middle of John's back and began to heal him. "Anything, my John."

Hearing that made John blush furiously, and he raised his shoulders and lowered his head a bit as if he was trying to disappear (or at least making an effort to try and hide it). "Thank you," he said as he felt the familiar effect of Fawnlock's magic spread through his muscles and bones.

When Fawnlock was done, he didn't pull away immediately. He chose to hold onto John for a moment longer; as he was uncertain whether he would have the chance again. When he decided to shift away he simply smiled at John. There were several moments of silence before Fawnlock's smile faded and he spoke again. "We must go." He said.

"Wait," John immediately cut in before Fawnlock could say anything else. "I want to do something first. Even before Doelly… _preferably_ before Doelly returns. Here, stand up," he said as he did just that himself.

Fawnlock was confused, but intrigued and willing. So he stood to his feet, placing himself in front of John. "Here?" He asked.

"Yup, just like that," John said with a nod. "I made a promise, and you're getting your proper hug, right now, when there's still time. So..." He expanded his arms, allowing Fawnlock to come to him rather than initiating himself, "come here."

With a small smile, Fawnlock obeyed John and drew closer to him to wrap his arms around him. It wasn't unlike the embraces they had shared before; the only difference was they were standing. He supposed this was a custom shared by all inukom, which somehow made Fawnlock feel more honoured.

As Fawnlock brought his arms around him, John did the same, but also took a step closer in order to make the embrace more intimate. It had to mean something, didn't it? His hold was firm and loving, and he had to hold back on wanting to grab ahold of Fawnlock's fur like he would a person's shirt. God, it had been ages since he had hugged someone like this. John was duly reminded that he was a bit shorter than Fawnlock, but he didn't feel inferior at all. In fact, the height difference only made it easier for him to nuzzle into the crook of Fawnlock's neck. So he did just that, while still tightening his hold ever so slightly.

Fawnlock enjoyed the feeling of John's warm embrace. It made him feel desired and completely whole. He felt as though John had been created especially for him. The way that they fit together was simply perfect. And Fawnlock didn't want it to end. So he continued to hold onto John with the same amount of strength as he had given him. As John burrowed his face just below his neck, Fawnlock leaned his head on the side of John's.

As the moment went on, John became more and more aware of the fact that this could potentially be the last time they would ever be able to do something like this. Something about that thought made him want to never let go, and so he held on tighter, if that was even possible. With all that in mind, John moved his head a bit so that he could lightly kiss Fawnlock's neck, just for good measure.

The small action was so unexpected that it lifted a small gasp from Fawnlock. He wasn't quite sure what to make of it. He knew that John had done this before on his forehead, but he hadn't realised that there were other places to express such affection. Curious, and hoping it wouldn't be offensive to do so; he lent his lips to the side of John's head.

Again John was feeling so much emotion that he was sure he could burst into tears just from how beautiful the whole thing was. He hadn't thought that Fawnlock would reciprocate his little peck, but now that he had, John felt himself blush even deeper than before. "You're certainly catching on," he heard himself say through his hazy mind and thumping heart.

Glad that John hadn't been offended, Fawnlock smiled and gently pulled himself away to look at John. With this brand new piece of information, Fawnlock saw endless possibilities. "Your kind call this, what?" He asked softly, just before leaning down and placing his lips against John's cheek.

For a moment, John wondered if it was possible for his body to pump his entire blood supply to his face. That was how he felt like, anyway. "The, uh, the lip thing?" he asked sheepishly, and when Fawnlock nodded, he replied: "Those are... kisses. One kiss, many kisses. Can be put anywhere, really, as long as the one receiving them is okay with it." He could have sworn that his reddening face was somehow making him talk faster, and ramble on unnecessarily.

"Kiss..." Fawnlock repeated. He was prepared to give John yet another kiss, but instead he pulled away slightly. "John... okay?" He asked with a small heat in his face.

"Me? Oh, yeah, I'm fine, just fine, everything's just fine," John replied hastily, cursing his own mouth for being so silly. "Why d'you ask? Are you okay?"

A small huff came from Fawnlock. It didn't happen as often as before, but he still didn't like it when they weren't able to communicate properly. "John... okay with, Fawnlock, kisses?" He asked again, more heat trailing up his neck and face.

"Yes!" John replied far too quickly, and instantly clamped his mouth shut. He cleared his throat. "I mean... yes. Yes, I'm okay with it. Them. With you. Everything. It's- yes."

The moment he heard John's response Fawnlock grinned. When he was through rambling, he leaned down to instinctively nuzzle John, but he hesitated. He reflected on how these 'kisses' worked, and it didn't take him long to wonder exactly what would happen if their lips ever met. The more Fawnlock became curious, the more he felt inclined to act upon it. As he edged closer to John, he felt his heartbeat rise to his throat.

At this point, John was honestly waiting for his head to explode. As Fawnlock inched closer to him, he was so aware of his own heartbeat ringing in his ears that he wouldn't have been surprised if his eyes decided to pop out from the pressure. He had almost frozen on the spot, but then found himself leaning in as well, despite having told Fawnlock that he would only do this if everything turned out okay. Now he figured that they should use their last chance for as much as they could. Only to feel like he had been yanked back forcibly the moment he heard a gasp from the other side of the cave. John was so surprised that he let out his own gasp as well.

" _I- I'm sorry- I-_ " Doelly stuttered, stopping only when Fawnlock raised a hand in her direction.

" _We will leave, now_." Fawnlock told her as he separated himself from John's embrace. When he saw her slight nod, he looked at John. " _Long road. We must go._ "

It took John a moment to compose himself after what had just happened, and he envied Fawnlock for being able to distance himself from the moment so easily. John nodded and pointed towards the heap of things he had brought. "Right, okay, I'm just going to pick up my stuff and we can be off," he said, trying to control his mouth now that nothing intimate was happening anymore. He still talked faster than usual. Damn.

Out of pure embarrassment, Doelly stood to her feet and turned away. Fawnlock looked after John, and placed a hand on his upper arm before he went anywhere further. Before John could say another word, Fawnlock leaned down to give John a small kiss on the cheek again. For some reason, Fawnlock couldn't get enough of John's taste and touch. But as much as he wanted to continue, he still found himself letting go of John, and pulling back.

John smiled at Fawnlock, now thankful that he had seen that the spirit wasn't as unattached as he had seemed just seconds before. "Likewise," John told him with a nod before he started gathering up his things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it seems short. That's probably due to the amount of fluff and less of the plot. But I hardly see a problem with that, and I'm sure you guys don't mind. ;) Thank you again for reading and giving us your feedback. It really means a lot to us.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are some new ideas and vocabulary that will crop up. If you're confused feel free to consult the ending notes.

Once they were ready, the three of them set out. Even in the light of the sun, the forest gave Fawnlock an eerie feeling. Because of this, he kept a close eye on Doelly, and kept himself closer to John while they walked along a narrow and twisted path. Though he knew the inhabited voji was more active during the night, Fawnlock didn't want to risk disturbing it or the forest around them.

To be in the domain of a powerful voji, was like walking along one of the voji's veins. Thus, they needed to be extra careful. "John, stay close." Fawnlock said quietly.

"Don't have to tell me twice," John replied while still trying to keep up with the spirits. Though they weren't walking as fast as the day before, he still had to struggle a bit because of the extra weight.

Doelly guided them in absolute silence. Though she couldn't tell, she had her suspicions that Wolfiarty was already following them. She fought the urge to look back, in fear that Fawnlock would grow suspicious.

When Fawnlock and John would lag behind, she found herself stopping and waiting patiently. Fawnlock was more grateful than skeptical.

As they walked on, John started to notice how Doelly would never turn around and glare like she had done before, which both made him feel strange and guilty. "Must still be cross with what she saw this morning..." he quietly said to Fawnlock.

Fawnlock's thoughts went immediately to all that had happened that morning. And felt a small heat rise to his cheeks when John said that. "Maybe." He said.

"Makes me feel even more like a dick," John continued, "because she obviously loves you."

When Fawnlock heard those words he gave John a small glance. "True. But... I do not. I have... made a choice." He said as he extended his hand towards John's.

John didn't need to be a genius to figure out what that meant. He swallowed, and, unable to look directly at Fawnlock just yet, took his hand in his own with a firm grip. "Don't say it," he then told the spirit as he felt his head spin with this new, but not entirely surprising, information.

Fawnlock gave John a weak smile, and turned back to the road ahead. As much as he wanted to say it, he figured his message had gotten across; and he wanted to respect John's wishes.

Fawnlock understood exactly why John didn't want him to say it yet. In case anything went wrong, John didn't want to make things harder than it would be. And if things went right, it would make everything that much more meaningful.

So they made their way through the woods, and once the darkened and scarred trees turned majestic, red and tall Fawnlock felt much more comfortable. He was now in much more familiar territory. " _How much longer, Doelly?_ " He asked.

Doelly jumped a little before turning towards Fawnlock. " _J- Just a few more miles, then we'll have to enter into the realm._ " She said.

Having been silent for the most part during the walk, John decided to speak again. "Hey, Fawnlock, is there some kind of specific... thing to do in order to get into the realm?"

"You have, entered before. You must touch me, and I will carry you to realm." Fawnlock explained. "Same with Moosecroft."

John looked down on their linked hands, and while he didn't express it, knew that the touching part was at least covered. He nodded, and then glanced over at Doelly. "What about her? Can she enter on her own? Or is it a Harina thing and not just a royal thing?"

"Harina. We all can enter realm. It is a matter of... voji." Fawnlock tried to explain, though he still felt limited so he gestured to his chest.

"Ah," John responded. "So basically, no humans. Except by touch. Fair enough, I guess."

Fawnlock nodded a little. "Touch, like... um, payment- no... per... permish..." He struggled to say.

"Uh... Permission?" John guessed as Fawnlock struggled.

"Yes!" Fawnlock chirped. "World is, five realms. Inu-- your kind, live in one. We live in two. Powerful gods can, exist in all."

John's eyes widened at that. He had known about at least three realms, but five? That was something else. "Damn..." he breathed. "Well, my entire world view just got flipped."

"Highest realm, Zerukom, is only seen by gods or dead. Then Samahattara, only where gods exsist. This mountain, this forest, they are gods. Each voji, give different names." Fawnlock explained with excitement in his voice.

"Wow, you all really have your own grand culture," John had to say. "Alright, then. I'll bite. What're the names? At least some of them?"

"That mountain," Fawnlock said as he pointed to the left of the mountainside, "Is Lerrnayin. He is powerful and not friendly. Though he protects us. The forest, with our home is Antarr. She is kind and wise. Like John." Fawnlock told him.

John let a small smile creep to his face at that, feeling his cheeks heat up as well. He almost made the point that he wasn't exactly wise, but bit it back. "I... try, I guess," he muttered, not really knowing how to respond.

Though Fawnlock believed that John was kind and wise with all of his heart, he did not press it. Instead he continued to tell John about the other realms. "After Samahattara, there is Voji. Our realm. Then Inukom. Your realm. And then Yamahvan... dark realm..." He said in a less enthusiastic voice.

"The demon place," John concluded, noting the shift in Fawnlock's tone.

"Yes. All evil, comes from Yamahvan." Fawnlock said.

"Including the one who owns the dark part of the forest," John continued, though he knew it was entirely unnecessary to point that out.

Fawnlock nodded. "Yes. His name is Wolfiarty. He wants to be a god."

Doelly's ears perked very slightly at the sound of Wolfiarty's name, but remained silent and continued walking forward. At that moment she felt a heavy presence settle on the back of her skull, as though she was being watched. Doelly still said nothing, and only listened as they spoke in words she couldn't understand.

"That's... weird, given that he's a demon," John said. "Kind of feels like one of those old fairy tale villains. The ones who feel they got wronged and want revenge. Think he has that sort of thing on his mind?"

"Maybe. There are many, stories, rumors, but all end with his goal is to gain power. To be powerful, and rule." Fawnlock explained.

"I get the feeling that's not the ideal result," John responded. "Sounds sort of crazy, too."

"It is. Though, he believes it is possible. And he will do everything to achieve it." Fawnlock said.

"It's a good thing we didn't come across him, then," John said, squeezing Fawnlock's hand. "I'd hate to have to fight a wolf spirit before even getting into your realm."

Fawnlock gave him a small smile and returned the slight squeeze. "Yes. I'm glad we are safe, from him... at least."

From the view of the inukom realm, the edge of the realm looked like a boarder of leaves and taller grass than the blades in the plains. Once they reached the edge, Doelly hesitated for a fraction of a second before walking through and disappearing in a flash of light.

Fawnlock looked to John and readjusted the grip on his hand. "You bow, when spoken to. I will speak for you, and tell you their words. Okay?"

John nodded. "Okay. And eye contact, yeah? Oh, and what about all this?" he added as he pointed to the stuff he had been carrying. "Think they'll take it as offerings or something?"

"Hope so. You must present them to royalty, first. Then rest." Fawnlock told him as he briefly eyed the bag. He looked into John's eyes and held onto his hand a bit tighter. "Ready?"

John took in a deep breath, and then let it out slowly, just then noticing that he was shaking slightly. He brushed it off for now and then hoisted his things over his back so that he could carry them. "As ready as I'll ever be," he said nervously, knowing fully well what he was getting himself into.

Fawnlock nodded and began to lead John through the realm. They walked slowly, as if they were walking against a strong wind. Ultimately, when they came to the other side they found Doelly waiting there. From what he could tell, they were just on the outskirts of the village. Fawnlock let go of John's hand and started to lead them on, but Doelly stayed behind. Fawnlock didn't bother to notice, as he was focused on what was to come.

Although John had been to the realm before, he hadn't noticed the slight differences the first time. Now, because he wanted to be on the lookout for everything, he scanned the place more thoroughly, and the first thing he noticed was that the colors were brighter. It was as if someone had put up a filter that altered the hue, so that the nature surrounding them looked more appealing.

When John looked around, he saw that Doelly was no longer with them, and momentarily searched for her. "Huh. I thought she'd want to come along..."

\--

As soon as she was out of their line of sight, Doelly slipped back through to the inukom realm. She stood just outside of the boarder, waiting patiently and nervously for Wolfiarty to reveal himself.

After a few seconds of silence, a high-pitched giggle surrounded Doelly as Wolfiarty made his way towards her, coming out of his hiding place. He clapped slowly, noticing the fear in her eyes. " _Bravo. I must say, that was a bold move,_ " he said as he approached Doelly. " _But oh goodness, how I see where you're coming from now. Poor, precious little thing, losing the prince to an inukom._ "

Doelly blushed fiercely, but made no comment, " _I- I've brought you here, now you must hold your end of the bargain._ " She said with as much strength as she could muster.

Wolfiarty grinned, baring his teeth. " _I will, don't worry,_ " he told Doelly, sounding reassuring. " _All in good time. Besides, I will need some help getting into the realm, won't I? I can't very well dispose of the wretched inukom without being able to touch it, you see._ "

With a slight hesitation, Doelly nodded as she slowly outstretched her hand to Wolfiarty.

" _That's a good girl,_ " Wolfiarty said, with his voice lower than before, as he reached out to grab Doelly's hand. He did so with more ferocity than intended, as he was extremely excited about what was to come.

Doelly winced a little when she felt Wolfiarty's claws digging into her skin. She took a small breath before she led Wolfiarty into the realm.  
  
\--

Meanwhile, Fawnlock and John walked further into the village together. And as they walked, the voji reacted one of two ways; they either hid themselves away, or they were drawn out by curiosity. Fawnlock ignored their judgmental and hushed voices as they spoke to one another. He was too focused on finding his father.

The more they walked, the more John felt like he shouldn't be looking at anything. While he knew he was supposed to look a spirit directly in the eyes while speaking to it, he had no idea whether or not he was supposed to shoot the villagers a glance. Ultimately, he decided not to, and followed Fawnlock further into the realm. With every step, he felt more nervous about this whole thing, especially considering he would have to face Fawnlock's father.

In the middle of the village, there was a monumental tree woven together by many other trees. That was their destination. When they walked through the entrance, all eyes were on them. Near the end of the room sat Fawnlock's family, sitting on top of the three of four majestic thrones made from branches and stone. The entire throne room was in complete silence as Fawnlock and John approached. As he expected, no one looked entirely pleased to see him.

Once Fawnlock was at a proper distance, he bowed slightly. " _Father, mother, Moosecroft._ " He greeted.

John made himself not look around this time, as he had to keep focus. He could almost sense the suspicion and hate towards him in the room, and found that he wouldn't have to look at any faces to confirm it. He stopped at around the same spot as Fawnlock had, and then took a step back before taking his own bow. He wondered briefly if he should kneel like he did for Moosecroft, but didn't move.

At the sight of the inukom, Moosecroft made a small face, although he tried not to make it too obvious. He sniffed the air for a second to check if the creature was to be considered safe, disappointed when he found that it was. For the time being.

" _You are late, Fawnlock._ " His mother pointed out, " _Your heldua has come. Why hadn't you come home sooner?_ " She asked.

" _I'm sorry, I had a late start. And I was travelling with this inukom._ " Fawnlock said.

Fawnlock watched as his mother cast John a glance and wore a curious expression. " _I see. Moosecroft, is this the inukom you spoke of before?_ " She asked.

Moosecroft nodded, tensing up a bit. " _It is, mother,_ " he replied, staring at John.

John himself had no idea what was going on, as he was only able to understand a few words. So he kept his head down, wondering when it would be appropriate to either look up, or present the vegetables he had brought.

" _You realise that bringing an inukom into our realm breaks the rules, put in place to keep our kind and its kind safe..._ " His mother pressed with a slight frown on her face.

Fawnlock nodded. " _I do. But he is different. I know the inukom have not been kind to us, but this one is different, I assure you._ " He told her before speaking to John, "Offerings."

John looked up at Fawnlock, and slowly took off the sack of vegetables he had been carrying. Refraining from letting out a sigh of relief at losing the weight, he presented the sack to the royals, opening it wide to let them see what was in it before doing anything else. Once he was certain that they knew his intentions, he put the sack down and let a few cabbages and beets drop out.

" _You see? He has brought you all offerings._ " Fawnlock told them.

Finally, after quietly observing his son and the inukom before him, the king spoke. " _Fawnlock, where exactly is your mate?_ " He asked, uninterested in what the inukom had to offer.

" _Her name is Doelly, dear._ " The queen corrected before looking back at Fawnlock. " _But yes, where is she?_ "

Fawnlock hesitated before answering, " _It doesn't matter to me. I do not want her._ "

As soon as Fawnlock had uttered those words, Moosecroft's eyes widened, and he stared at his brother in disbelief. " _Have I heard correctly?_ " he said, aiming his words at his parents. " _Surely my ears must have deceived me_."

" _Oh you heard me correctly. I do not want Doelly as my mate._ " Fawnlock said firmly.

The queen looked completely stunned at her youngest son. " _You would dare to go against our tradition, Fawnlock?_ " She asked.

" _To be honest, my love, it's not the first time this has happened._ " The king reassured her, " _From birth, Fawnlock has been set in his own ways. We should have expected this. It's obvious he's found someone else within the artaldea. Isn't that right, son?_ "

Fawnlock swallowed a bit before finding his courage. " _No. Not exactly._ "

John was becoming increasingly worried about the situation. He wasn't sure why, but hearing Fawnlock hesitate like that made him fear for the worst. That it was coming to the time where he would reveal his intentions. Oh God.

" _Oh?_ " Moosecroft perked in a condescending way. " _You can't possibly mean that you are shying away from mating altogether, can you?_ "

" _No. I have found my own mate._ " Fawnlock told them. " _It is the inukom I have brought to stand before you._ "

Horror and disbelief washed over both his mother and father's faces. Fawnlock's father was absolutely speechless. " _An inukom?_ " The queen cried.

 _Here we go..._ John instantly thought as he heard the reactions. There were whispers and murmurs all throughout the room, and John could have sworn that he heard someone about to sprint towards him, but holding back.

" _You cannot be serious,_ " Moosecroft breathed, so in shock that he had a hard time finding his voice. " _After all they've done to us?_ "

" _You must learn not to count the actions of one inukom, define the entirety of its species, dear brother._ " Fawnlock said pointedly. 

Slowly, the king felt anger curling in the core of his being. He stood to his feet and addressed everyone in the room. " _Everyone, leave at once! This is a private matter._ " He commanded with a booming voice.

As everyone began to leave, the queen looked upon her son with utter disappointment. " _I don't understand, Fawnlock. How could you do this?_ " She asked.

" _While every inukom had shown you anger, John showed me kindness. More kindness than I ever received, even from my own people._ " Fawnlock said.

The words struck Moosecroft in a way that he couldn't place, so he ignored the feeling for now and turned to his parents. " _I tried to warn him,_ " he said in a pleading tone. " _I honestly did try and get him to stay away from it. I always knew something bad would come from this._ "

Fawnlock's father sat back down on his throne, and looked between Fawnlock and the inukom. He processed Moosecroft's words, and tucked them away for now. " _May I remind you, Fawnlock... of the natural order of this world? We are above inukom. We are not equals._ " He told him.

" _We are more alike than you care to believe, I assure you._ " Fawnlock told them.

" _How dare you!_ " The queen cried. " _The inukom are nothing like us. We are more powerful than they will ever be. They had their chance to be our equals, and they still chose their heinous ways!_ "

It took all of John's being to keep calm, not only because now there were fewer spirits in the room, but also because of the raised voices. It was clear as day that Fawnlock had said something to upset them. John didn't want to know what, but he knew for a fact that it was something about him.

Moosecroft proudly put his chin up, looking down on his brother as if to say 'I told you so'. " _Pray tell, dear brother, how do you reason for that? We have yet to see a single inukom act any different from the ones in the past. What makes this one so special?_ "

Fawnlock sent a glare in Mooscroft's direction as he answered, " _Well for one thing, he did not try to kill me. Even when I was helplessly at his disposal, he released me. He gave me offerings. And later on, he took me in and I lived with him._ "

" _You lived with him? Willingly?_ " His father asked.

" _Yes._ " Fawnlock said as he turned to the king, " _And while I was there he treated me with the upmost respect._ "

" _How can you be certain it hasn't simply been gaining your trust over time?_ " Moosecroft cut in. " _I told you, these beings are savages. It is no doubt waiting for the opportune moment to strike._ "

" _John would never harm me. Not even if his life depended on it."_ Fawnlock said immediately.

" _I don't think you understand the consequences of this decision, Fawnlock_." His father told him.

" _I understand them perfectly, father_."

The queen stood from her throne, drawing Fawnlock's attention to her. " _It has always been tradition that once a royal is past heldua, they are to come back to the artaldea, bond, and remain with the artaldea. You have a sacred duty here, with your people, Fawnlock_. _You will become a ruler of all harina._ " She told him. " _Do you wish to abandon your duty as prince? Should you force us to banish you? Our youngest son?"_

Fawnlock chose to remain silent for a moment, to collect his thoughts. Just when the queen thought she had won him over, he spoke. " _You say I have a duty to my people. The same people who never showed me mercy, kindness, or love. You think I would abandon the one being who showed me all of those things? I would gladly exchange them for my own life with my John._ " He said.

At this point, John wanted Fawnlock to translate for him at least the basics of what was being said, because he really wanted to know if they were headed in the right direction. As soon as he opened his mouth, though, a horrified shriek was heard from outside the throne room, which was quickly joined in by a few others. John tensed, wondering what could be going on, but didn't have to think for long, as the doors to the room flew open, revealing a very smug-looking Wolfiarty.

" _Well!_ " he said, impressed with the situation. " _Will you look at that? It’s a family reunion with a little inukom in the mix. Dear me, how could it have come to this?_ " he added, bringing a hand to his forehead in a mocking fashion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vocabulary thus far:  
> Inukom - Human.  
> Offerings - Food or objects that are willingly given to the forest spirits (especially royalty) by inukom or other lesser beings.  
> Vouk - Wolf spirit.  
> Artaldea - The Harina herd.  
> Alieni roh - The antlers on a Harina.  
> Heldua - a crucial point in a Harina spirit's life where they reach maturity.
> 
> Zerukom - Death. The great beyond for the souls of pure spirits and beings alike.  
> Samahattara realm - The higher seeing world, as viewed by glorious and powerful gods.  
> Voji realm - The seeing/living world as viewed by the forest spirits.  
> Inukom realm - The seeing/living world as viewed by humans and lesser beings.  
> Yamahvan - Death. The underworld realm for demons, cursed spirits and evil beings.
> 
> If we've missed any definitions feel free to tell us right away. We hope you're enjoying the story! Thank you for all the feedback. We appreciate it very much. More to come next Saturday. We hope you've had a lovely Holiday. See you next year!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. Here's the latest installment. Happy reading!

Fawnlock turned around and looked upon Wolfiarty in surprise and caution. While the queen was frozen in her place, the king stood up and glared. " _What is a demon like you doing in our realm?_ " He asked.

Wolfiarty raised his hands in defense, and then shrugged. " _I made a deal, obviously_ ," he told the king. " _Isn't that what demons are all about? Deals and cryptic messages and all that? And I must say, this one was rather easy to make, especially since there were no given specifics._ " He smirked, making his sharpest teeth visible.

John could only stay perfectly still. He was beginning to wonder if he would ever be able to move again, and now that this new spirit was here - one that apparently the royals were afraid of - he was certain it was all over.

" _Deal?_ " The king asked before looking at his youngest son.

Out of the corner of Fawnlock's eye, he saw his father turn to him. So he looked back at him with a scowl on his face. " _You honestly think I would go around making deals with demon filth like him?_ " Fawnlock asked.

" _Oh, no no no, don't be obvious,_ " Wolfiarty said in a disappointed manner, shaking his head and looking at the king. " _If the prince had made a deal, he would have had his way by now. No, this was someone entirely different. One who I'm sure will make a great partner one day, if they let their jealousy grow like they already have._ "

At that moment, Doelly revealed herself to them. The queen looked on in sorrow, " _Oh Doelly..._ " She breathed.

" _I- I wouldn't have had to bring him here, if you had accepted me, Fawnlock._ " Doelly told him.

Fawnlock felt his fur stand on its end when he heard that. " _You wouldn't have had to bring him, if you had respected my decision, Doelly_." He growled.

" _Don't you see? It was never just your decision, Fawnlock! I- I have feelings too._ " Doelly said.

Wolfiarty moved over towards Doelly and snaked one arm around her, using his other hand to cup her face. " _See, this is someone who knows what they're talking about,_ " he said as he pinched Doelly's cheek. " _It takes two to properly dance, sweet prince. And now she doesn't have a partner, so her rhythm gets wobbly. We can't have that._ "

Moosecroft huffed, and glared in the demon's direction. Although Doelly was not his mate, he did not approve of the demon touching her like that. " _Do you see what you've done?"_ he asked his brother. " _Are you happy with your decision now? You have not only upset your mate to the point of betrayal, but because of you, we now have a demon in our realm!"_

" _Now, now, settle down, senior prince,"_ Wolfiarty said in a soothing voice. " _You shouldn't worry so much; your fur will get grey. And besides, this isn't about you. More or less. This is about our little inukom friend!"_

When Fawnlock heard that, his fur continued to bristle with anger. He stood in a way that was blocking John from Wolfiarty's view. " _I don't know what you want with him, but I will not allow you to touch him_." He growled.

John had never felt more lost and confused. He could feel the tension, but had no context as to who or what they were talking about. At least not until he heard a word he was familiar with.  
  
Wolfiarty only kept grinning, and now gestured towards John. " _Aw, but look at it! So pretty and full of life_ ," he drawled, loving the angry look on Fawnlock's face. " _It's what our darling here wanted, you know. She's **harsh**. You're missing out on a good mate, princey. Look at what she's prepared to do just to get what she wants. Now that's determination!_ "  
  
" _No. That's stupidity!_ " Fawnlock exclaimed. " _If she really had wanted me, she would have come and found me years before my heldua_."   
  
Immediately Doelly spoke up. " _I didn't, because unlike you, I know where I belong. And I know I belong with the artaldea. Not mingling with inukom!_ " She snapped.  
  
" _See? Like a true harina, she knows her place_ ," Wolfiarty said proudly, clawing lightly at Doelly's face. " _She's absolutely ideal. And meanwhile, you settle for an inukom. A measly, old, worn-out little inukom with nothing coming for it except its inevitable death_."  
  
" _I'm not settling for anything. I have found a being that respects and adores me. Settling would be if I gave John up for a selfish, insecure, idiotic and naive female like Doelly!_ " Fawnlock growled.   
  
" _Fawnlock!_ " The queen exclaimed.   
  
Doelly looked hurt as well as angry when Fawnlock had said those terrible things. " _You- you don't mean that. It's that creature! It's turned you against me. Against all of us._ "  
  
At this point, John felt like he had been standing in the background with his head bowed down for long enough. He adjusted his stance - keeping his eyes closed for the time being - and then turned towards the new spirit. As he opened his eyes, he bit back a surprised gasp at the sight before him, as he had not expected to see something like this.

The spirit's fur was far darker than on any of the deer, and seemed more wild and dirt-ridden. Where the harina had soft, magical fingers, this one (what had Fawnlock called it? vouk?) had sharp claws. And to top it all off, its face was almost maniacal, emphasised by its long, sharp teeth. John swallowed, but stared into its mad eyes nonetheless.   
  
Wolfiarty almost jumped when John moved, and then let out a slightly panicked laugh. " _And turning **towards** me, apparently!_" he exclaimed gleefully, feeling more giddy and excited than ever now that the inukom had acknowledged his presence.  
  
Fawnlock decided they were beyond formalities at this point, so he wasn't surprised when John had cropped up beside him. He looked at John briefly, "Wolfiarty." He told him before he protectively held his arm out in front of John. " _So get on with it, what do you want with John?_ " He asked. " _Because if you plan to harm him, I reassure you, that will never happen_."  
  
" _And you call her naive_ ," Wolfiarty said with a giggle, scratching at Doelly's cheek again. He then separated himself from her and shoved her aside. " _Oh, but I made a deal, sweet prince. And I have to do what I promised, because otherwise things could get a bit... dark. I said I'd dispose of the inukom, and let me tell you, there are tons of ways to do that. I could leap at it now and tear it limb from limb. Or maybe I could throw something at it; something resembling its own weapons. Of course, those are the easy and boring ways. My favourite is using magic_." 

Doelly looked at Wolfiarty, his words piercing through her heart. She had never wished anything ill on the inukom, she had just wanted him gone.

As Wolfiarty uttered the last words, he brought one of his hands up, which was now glowing a bright red. _"I could quicken its aging process - but that's too obvious. I could stop its heart - but that's just dull. I could shut down its brain - but again, that's boring._ " He brought his other hand to his chin in thought, and then smirked at Fawnlock. " _Maybe I could burn it. Not in the predictable, ordinary way, oh no. But from the inside. Set its entire being on fire, and there would be nothing anyone could do about it. Let its bones and muscles and veins and organs **burn** while it screams in agony_."  
  
When Fawnlock heard Wolfiarty's words, and saw him draw nearer, he began to conjure up his own magic. " _If you do, I swear I will do all of that to you, and more._ " He growled.   
  
" _If we let you have it, will you leave this place?_ " The queen asked with calmness in her voice.  
  
Wolfiarty's grin widened as he looked over to the queen. " _Of course, your majesty_ ," he said just as calmly, with a small bow. " _I will simply do what I came here to do, and then I'll be out of here. Not to worry_."   
  
Though he still kept his straight stance, John was growing more afraid by the second, and Fawnlock conjuring up his magic in a threatening manner did absolutely nothing to calm him. "Fawnlock," he began, and then found he had to swallow. "What's going on?"  
  
"Wolfiarty, wants to kill John." Fawnlock told him before speaking to his mother. " _Do you honestly believe the words coming from the mouth of a demon? He will not leave us. He will stay and curse our people!_ "   
  
" _Fawnlock, you must give the inukom over. There are many inukom. Would you sacrifice your kingdom for a single inukom?_ " The queen asked.   
  
" _Yes! And even if that was the case, and the demon allowed us all to live, I would still do the same!_ " Fawnlock shouted.   
  
" _Now, Fawnlock, listen to reason_ \--" His father began.   
  
" _No! Listen to what you are saying! Mother, when I was young I remember you teaching to me that all life was sacred. How is John's life any different? He lives and breathes, thinks and speaks, laughs, learns and loves..._ " Fawnlock said in a desperate tone. " _And I... I love him._ "  
  
" _Oh ho **ho**!_ " Wolfiarty chirped as the royal family collectively gasped. " _Who saw that one coming? I certainly didn't!_ "   
  
Moosecroft's face twitched, and he eyed his brother, his glare icy. " _Are you even aware of what that word means?_ " he exclaimed. " _Do you realise what you are saying?_ "  
  
" _Of course I understand! I'm asking if you do. We once lived in harmony with the inukom. Why not again? Because you say so, Moosecroft?_ " Fawnlock asked, bitterness dripping from his brother's name.  
  
" _Not only that, but because it's wrong!_ " Moosecroft roared, slamming down his fists to emphasise the last word. " _Morally, and disgustingly wrong!_ "   
  
As the brothers argued, Wolfiarty looked on, loving the anger on the two, as well as John's completely clueless face. " _Oh, this is better than I thought it would be..._ "  
  
" _I don't care! I want to be with John, and that's my final decision. So cast me out! Strip me of my magic, I don't care what you lot do to me or say to me. I will have John, and there's nothing in all of the five realms that will keep me from him!_ " Fawnlock roared.  
  
Wolfiarty let out a large laugh at that. " _Isn't this just the most touching thing?_ " he said, directing his words at the family. " _The rebel prince! One who will do anything for love! Oh, my heart just melts!_ " After his little mocking, he reverted back to his sinister grin. " _Of course, there is one option none of you have considered..._ "  
  
Fawnlock turned to Wolfiarty and glared. " _And what's that?_ " He asked.  
  
" _I mean, sure, you've got your usual little verbal punishments and walks of shame and banishment and all that, but wouldn't it be more interesting to go with a more fun option?_ " Wolfiarty drawled, counting everything up as if it was the most basic thing in the world.   
  
" _Out with it, demon_ ," Moosecroft sighed, having already had more than enough of what was happening.   
  
Wolfiarty turned towards the family again and flashed his bare-toothed smirk. " _It's simple_ ," he said as he took his place in front of the royals, hands behind his back, and composure relaxed. " _Execution. Which, I might add, I would be more than happy to perform_."  
  
Fawnlock watched as his father gave John a short glance before he looked back at Wolfiarty. " _No. You have overstayed your welcome, demon._ "   
  
The queen looked shockingly at her husband. " _Are you defending the inukom?_ " She asked.   
  
" _I never said I was._ " The king said calmly. " _I only want this demon out of our realm. Can't you see he's poisoning our minds? He's the one who’s **truly** turning us against one another._ " He then turned to the vouk, " _Look here, demon filth, I want you out of my kingdom. Or I shall be forced to drive you out myself._ "  
  
Wolfiarty laughed, sounding much madder. He then relaxed again, and eyed the king threateningly. " _I'd like to see you try, old coot_ ," he said, showing off his claws.  
  
When the king heard that, he began to conjure his magic. He took a few, powerful steps forward, towering over Wolfiarty. " _Leave. Now_." He said through gritted teeth.  
  
The giddy feeling that had been present in Wolfiarty before returned, and although he still showed signs of rage, he grinned nonetheless. " _Or you'll do what?_ " he snapped back. " _Banish me? Kill me? We all know the last one is not going to happen_."  
  
" _Think again, demon scum!_ " The king exclaimed as he cast his magic in Wolfiarty's direction.  
  
Wolfiarty made no effort to move out of the way or do anything to protect himself, and simply allowed the hit. He was thrown off his feet and flew a few meters back before coming back down again. When he did, the first thing he did was let out a low chuckle. " _Is that it?_ " he managed as he stood back up again. " _Oh, how old age has not been kind to you. See, that's your problem. You don't bring enough emotion into it. You need to... **feel** in order to do that blow correctly. Sort of like this!_" And with that, Wolfiarty threw his own magic at the king, laughing giddily the whole time.  
  
Though the king was able to shield himself against the blast of magic, he stumbled back a bit. As soon as the red dissipated, the queen began to cast her own magic on the surrounding walls. After a moment, the branches began to move on their own and rushed at Wolfiarty in an attempt to ensnare him.  
  
" _Oh no, no, this is too easy_!" Wolfiarty exclaimed in exasperation as he started conjuring up his magic yet again. The red glows now more resembled flames than the aura they had looked like before, and after a bit of build-up, Wolfiarty cast them towards the queen's branches. " _Far, **far** too easy!_"

Everything became too intense for Doelly. In fear of her own life she fled the scene as quickly as she could.  
  
Fawnlock saw the flames engulf the branches, and spread quickly to the top half of the dome. He built up enough of his energy to cast his own spell, a whirlwind to put out the fire, and cast it towards Wolfiarty.  
  
At the same time, Moosecroft used his own magic to shake the ground where Wolfiarty was standing, hoping to make him lose his balance and thus his focus. The wolf, however, just continued laughing giddily. " _Finally! A real challenge!_ " he yelled maniacally as he let another blast build up in his hands before aiming at Fawnlock this time, making sure that the blast would be hard enough for the other to be knocked down.  
  
Because the blast had come so quickly, Fawnlock had no time to recover from conjuring his spell, let alone block Wolfiarty's magic. When the spell hit him, it sent Fawnlock flying to the side of the room.  
  
Everyone in the room was prepared to lash out at Wolfiarty again, but he was fully prepared. He shot some stunning blasts at them before building up his own last blow at Fawnlock. His face grew more and more sinister the more he built it up, and just as he released it, his eyes were practically glowing. " _Good night, darling_ ," he drawled before shooting.   
  
As the blast coursed through the room, a faint 'no!' could be heard before it hit. The family gasped and cried in horror at the enormity of the impact, with Wolfiarty’s exhausted laughs echoing in the background. Once the blast's aftermath had cleared - mostly severe light and some mild mist - it became clear that Fawnlock hadn't been hit. At least not very hard. What came as a surprise to the family was the fact that the inukom now lay motionless on the ground in front of him.  
  
Though the hit had been hard on Fawnlock, he managed to open his eyes and see what had happened. He thought for sure he would have been dead, or at least sporting a few broken limbs. But when the magic had cleared, he knew exactly what had happened. Fawnlock immediately sat up and crawled towards John. "John? John!" He cried out.   
  
Never before, in all the centuries he had lived, had the king seen such a sacrifice made. From an inukom, no less. As he watched his son cradle the withering form of his inukom, the king felt a great deal of regret and sadness. 

The moment Fawnlock let out an anguished cry, the queen had a change of heart. She felt an overwhelming anger towards Wolfiarty. She used that to fuel her magic as she cast a spell in his direction.  
  
Fawnlock's cry pierced through Moosecroft like a dagger, and he realised he had never heard anything like it; especially not from his brother. The thought alone that one demon was able to cause such an emotion within the sheltered Fawnlock was enough for Moosecroft to channel all his previous rage to the wolf.

The elder prince joined his mother in casting magic towards Wolfiarty, knowing that attacking while he was down was their best option now. In that moment, the king also sent his magic at Wolfiarty, hoping to at least do some damage to the demon.   
  
Despite the chaos unfolding before him, Fawnlock continued to hold John close to him. "J- John... please..." He murmured as he stroked John's hair.  
  
All things considered, John shouldn't even have been alive after the impact. For this hard a blast to hit him, he should have been killed instantly. And yet, as Fawnlock continued to mutter softly and stroke his hair, he miraculously stirred. At first, he only gasped for air, but that quickly turned into a coughing fit.  
  
"John. John. C- calm. F- Fawnlock, heal." Fawnlock struggled to say through his worried tears.  
  
The coughing eventually slowed down, and despite the pain in his lungs, John was able to speak. "Boy, that... that was... stupid," he managed, his voice hoarse and weak.  
  
"N- not stupid. John, brave. T- thank you." Fawnlock managed to choke out. He lowered his forehead onto John's, and placed a hand in the middle of his chest. Fawnlock took in a shaky breath and slowly began to heal John.  
  
Even though John could feel Fawnlock's hand on his chest, he wasn't able to feel any effect of the magic there. So he carefully lifted his hand up to Fawnlock's face, and smiled despite himself. "I... I don't think- you can... fix this," he all but whispered.  
  
Tears fell from Fawnlock's eyes and landed on John's face. He was determined. "Fawnlock, heal John. I will, heal. I will..." He said harshly. Fawnlock's hand glowed brighter and brighter, until his arm began to glow.  
  
"Fawn- lock..." John tried, still not feeling anything but the slightest spark, even though Fawnlock's entire arm was glowing. "Magic... I think magic... hurts me different- ly." He soon found that he was blinking down tears as well. "Harder to heal. See?"  
  
When Fawnlock heard that, he stopped trying to heal John. Immediately Fawnlock understood that in order to destroy the effects of demon’s magic, he needed to destroy the demon. He gently nuzzled John before pulling away slightly. "John... stay." He told him.  
  
At that, John's smile widened for a second before softening. With his hand still on Fawnlock's face, he pressed their foreheads together again. "I- I'll try to... hold on for as long as I can," he managed, still sounding weak.  
  
Fawnlock slowly brought himself out of John's grasp, and placed him delicately on the forest floor. He rose to his feet and looked directly at Wolfiarty. The magic in his hand swept across his entire body, the aura lifting from his form like smoke. The markings on his fur glowed brighter than anything on him. Fawnlock felt the surge of power coursing throughout his entire being. He began to walk towards Wolfiarty, plants and flowers growing in his wake.  
  
John forced himself to look after Fawnlock as he went away, feeling a slight pain in his gut that he was certain had nothing to do with Wolfiarty's shot. He ordered himself to think that Fawnlock had stepped away and told him to stay for a reason, and was thus able to stop focusing on it. He closed his eyes and tried to think of a good place to start his afterlife. He thought back to his cottage; to his and Fawnlock's time spent together. It made everything a bit easier.   
  
As Moosecroft furiously shot at Wolfiarty, he caught a glimpse of his brother walking towards the wolf. His eyes widened when he saw the amount of magic surrounding Fawnlock, and he called out to his parents to have a look as well.  
  
The moment they saw Fawnlock, their magic ceased. Both the king and the queen were in shock and awe of what was unfolding in front of them. More than that, the king grew concerned. He knew that while Fawnlock's magical and physical strength was at its peak; his emotions were leaving him vulnerable. After seeing it happen many times before, the king knew when a voji was at the risk of becoming a demon.   
  
Fawnlock continued walking to Wolfiarty, anger boiling through his veins. He curled his hand into a fist and swiped the air, causing a blade of magic to project itself at the demon.  
  
Though he was beaten down and extremely weak, Wolfiarty was somehow still able to conjure up some kind of defensive wall to block most of Fawnlock's attack. It still hit, but not as badly as it would have done normally. There was now a large gash in his side, but he thought nothing of it, and simply struggled to stand up once more.   
  
" _Good! Very good_ ," he managed to say before a mad chuckle escaped him. " _I hope you're taking notes, oh you king of everything, because **that's**_ _how it's done!_ " With that, he let his own attack build up; annoyed that it wouldn't do so properly because of his injuries. But it was no matter; Fawnlock would still feel a sting or two. Wolfiarty struck again.  
  
At the right moment, Fawnlock deflected Wolfiarty's attack with his forearm. The magic was guided into the nearest wall, and the impact left his fur singed, but Fawnlock ignored those details. All he was focused on was killing the demon. 

Fawnlock drew even closer to the vouk, with a ball of light forming in the middle of his palm. " _I made you a solid oath, vouk. And unlike demon filth, such as yourself, I keep my word._ " Fawnlock threatened without even speaking aloud. He was deep inside the insane mind of the demon before him. " _I will burn, **you**!_ " And then tossed his magic directly at him.  
  
Wolfiarty was so taken aback by the fact that he could hear Fawnlock's voice inside his head that he couldn't think of anything to do. All he managed was to put up the smallest barrier between them, but even then he got hit. He tumbled to the ground, but instead of grunting or making any kind of struggling sounds, he instead let out the loudest laugh yet.

" _That's iiit..._ " Wolfiarty drawled as he prepared for another fire attack. " _Let the hate and anger fill you up. Become one with it. Become like **me**!_ " He cast the fire at Fawnlock instantly.  
  
Fawnlock responded to the attack by conjuring up another gust of wind, except it morphed into a tornado. " _I will never be like you! I am implementing justice! I'm doing this world a favor of distinguishing you._ " He said, searing the words in Wolfiarty's mind. As he stepped closer to Wolfiarty, he shaped his magic into a blade, which he held in his hand.  
  
At this point, Wolfiarty couldn't stop himself from holding onto his own head, as if that would make Fawnlock's voice go away. He shook his head and then looked at Fawnlock again, his eyes twitching. " _You can keep telling yourself that_ ," he said darkly, " _but all you're doing is making yourself stronger by fuelling your hate. And it's gorgeous!_ "  
  
Hearing those words only fueled Fawnlock's anger towards the demon. " _Shut up!_ " He held his blade up to Wolfiarty's throat, to show that he had him beat. " _You are at my mercy now, demon. I will not have your hold over John any longer. Prepare to die._ "  
  
Despite knowing that he had no chance of getting out of this alive, Wolfiarty's grin widened even more, to the point that he looked possessed. " _I'll see you in Yamahvan, sweet prince Fawnlock_ ," he said softly.  
  
Fawnlock said nothing as he lifted the blade a great distance from Wolfiarty's neck. From afar, his father cried out to him to stop. There was no hesitation whatsoever as Fawnlock decapitated the demon's head with one forceful strike. And even in his victory, Fawnlock still felt an overwhelming rage. He stood over the body of Wolfiarty, full of hatred and despair.   
  
A great darkness began to grow from inside Fawnlock, and it was rapidly growing out of control. For a moment, he felt panicked, so he walked closer to the throne. As he walked, the roots from the forest floor began to ensnare him. The aura around him turned as dark as night, and it seemed as though Fawnlock was slowly melting away. The queen recoiled into the arms of her husband, who could only watch as his son was consumed by darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inukom - Human.  
> Heldua - a crucial point in a spirit's life where they reach maturity.  
> Harina - Deer spirit.  
> Artaldea - The deer spirit herd.  
> Vouk - Wolf spirit.
> 
> Zerukom - Death, the great beyond for the souls of spirits and beings alike.  
> Samahattara realm - The higher seeing world, as viewed by glorious and powerful gods.  
> Voji realm - The seeing/living world as viewed by the forest spirits.  
> Inukom realm - The seeing/living world as viewed by humans and lesser beings.  
> Yamahvan - Death. The underworld for demons, cursed spirits and evil beings.
> 
> Once again thank you for reading! We would really appreciate your feedback. It means a lot to us. Thank you~ <33


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the lateness, I deeply apologize. I hope this chapter meets your expectations. Happy reading!

What was strange about the whole dying process was the fact that John couldn't feel a thing. No pleasant feeling, no relief, nothing. At least the pain was gone, though. That was something. Except-- No.

That didn't make any sense. If he didn't feel any pain, then why wasn't he dead yet?

John opened his eyes and lifted his hands, surprised to find that it didn't hurt nearly as much as before. He then slowly pushed himself up to a sitting position, quick to come to the conclusion that he hadn't, in fact, died, and that the injuries caused by Wolfiarty's magic were gone. He huffed a laugh in relief, and started looking for the one he knew was somehow responsible for this.

"Fawnlock! Fawnlock, you did it! You fixed the--"   
  
He was silenced instantly when he saw what was going on. The royal family was lying in a heap on the ground, seemingly from exhaustion, clinging onto one another in fear. It didn't take John long to see why.

Fawnlock was turning into something dark, something sinister, and it was as if the ground wanted to capture him and drag him down to the soil and bury him alive. John instantly stood up and looked on in horror. "Fawnlock..."  
  
As the darkened branches tightened their hold, Fawnlock began to understand. The roots were becoming a part of him, just like the darkness and the anger. Fawnlock no longer resisted the change; he welcomed it. Even as his skin and fur began to turn black and melt away. His transformation felt right.  
  
"No!" John exclaimed, and although he still felt a bit faint after the blast, he sprinted towards Fawnlock without any hesitation.

In his mind, he could hear Fawnlock's words from the day before. “ _Most voji, fall into hate. Allow it to... consume them. Then become demon_.” He could not believe he was actually seeing that happen, and even if he knew he would possibly not be able to reverse the process at this point, he tried to reason with the spirit.

"Fawnlock, please. You're not- like this. Please fight it. Resist it." He told him.  
  
At the first sight of John, Fawnlock growled at him. He had almost forgotten who he was. When he remembered he only smiled and spoke inside his mind. " **Don't you see, John? With this power, I can take what I want. No authority. I will be king.** "  
  
John gasped when he heard Fawnlock's voice inside his mind rather than coming out of his mouth, and took a step back, and then grew immensely concerned. "You don't want that," he tried. "You know you don't want that. You told me, several times, that you didn't want royal life, or power, or anything of the like. Please fight back; I mean, listen to yourself. _Look_ at yourself!"  
  
" **This, is my truest form. I understand that now." Fawnlock told him as he grew a deep frown, "Why aren't you happy for me? I saved your life, inukom.** "  
  
John's concerned expression turned into a disappointed frown, one that was more sad than angry. The fact that Fawnlock, or whatever this thing was, didn't even use his name felt like a kick in the gut.

"If this is what I have to see because of that, then I don't want to have been saved," he told the spirit. "You're not my Fawnlock anymore."  
  
The anger Fawnlock was feeling inside him made the blackness fume and bubble. The branches surrounding him twisted into knots, and he looked on at John in pure rage. " **This is the thanks I receive? After all that I've done for you? You inukom are all the same! Selfish.** "  
  
"Good. I'm glad you feel that way," John said calmly, growing more upset by the second. He actually had to make an effort to look at this _thing_ , since he knew that Fawnlock was in there somewhere. "You shouldn't have saved me. Not if it turns you into this. And if you think we _inukom_ are such scum, why don't you do something about this one? Hm?" John expanded his arms, gesturing to himself. "I'm not allowed to be here, and now I've revealed my _selfish_ nature. And you, since you won't even make an effort to fight back, are clearly the most powerful being in the room. So go on, then. Get rid of me. Or, if you really are still my Fawnlock, prove it."  
  
Fawnlock stared into John's eyes, his rage welling up inside of him. Blind with fury, Fawnlock reached out and placed a wooden hand onto John's throat. Though he had John in his grasp, he didn't do anything immediately. Slowly, Fawnlock's eyes turned a bright yellow. " **No. I will not give you the luxury of a quick death.** "  
  
The grasp was not particularly rough, but because the hand was so solid and wooden, it felt harder than it was. John struggled to breathe for a second, and then looked directly into the thing's eyes; ones that he barely even recognised. He ignored the thing's warning, or whatever that was supposed to be, and spoke: "Please, Fawnlock, I know you're in there. And I know you're--" he gasped, "strong enough to fight it. Please! Think back to- the first time we met, and how I was--" another gasp, "just as scared of you as you were of me!"  
  
Upon hearing those words, Fawnlock blinked and rubbed his eye as though he had something in it. The yellow color had vanished from his eyes, and returned them to their natural color. Despite this, the rage he felt still coursed through him. " **You would have killed me and taken my fur!** "  
  
"And in all the time you've known me," John choked, "when have I ever- shown signs of wanting to- hurt you? I would never hurt--!" He couldn't go on, as the wooden hand had pressed into his throat hard enough to block his voice.  
  
Even though Fawnlock had all of the anger in the entire world, he took those words into consideration. He thought back on their time together. And as he began to recall those exact happenings, the wood began to retreat into the ground. But his handle on John had not been released. "John... would never hurt Fawnlock." He said verbally and slowly.  
  
John struggled against the hand, gasping a few times before managing a few words. "No, never. Please--" He gasped. "Please- remember... our times."  
  
The moment Fawnlock began to remember was the same moment he released John's throat. Instead of rage, Fawnlock was filled with calmness and joy. Everything that had been said or done came flooding back into his mind all at once. "Fawnlock... likes John."  
  
John had to take a few seconds to catch his breath after all that, but felt overcome with relief when he saw that some of the darkness was fading, and that Fawnlock was looking more like himself again. John coughed a bit, and smiled at him. "Yes... And- John likes Fawnlock too. So much," he managed.  
  
Slowly, his aura shifted back from black to green, and in that moment Fawnlock returned to normal as soon as his aura disappeared entirely. When that happened, Fawnlock immediately felt remorse for what he had said and done to John. "I am sorry..." He told him.  
  
The transformation back to normal made John want to leap with joy, but he settled with allowing his smile to widen. "You- you're back," he croaked, still recovering a bit. "You did it."  
  
Fawnlock couldn't help but grin when he heard that. He reached for John's shoulders and placed his forehead on top of John's. "Thank you." He expressed.   
  
His family, on the other hand, was left completely stunned. Neither the king nor the queen had ever seen a voji of any kind resist becoming a demon.  
  
John wrapped his arms around Fawnlock, feeling the dread from before completely vanishing and making room for the happiest feeling he had experienced in a while. "It's the least I could do after everything you've done for me," he said as he clung onto Fawnlock.  
  
If it were possible, Fawnlock's grin grew wider. He gently nuzzled John with pure joy.   
  
From behind them, the queen blushed at the sight, while the king smiled in amusement and wonder.  
  
The nuzzle caused John's cheeks to heat up, and he could feel his heart flutter. He pulled back slightly, and looked Fawnlock right in the eyes, so glad that they were back to normal. He gazed into them for a second, and then breathed: "Fawnlock...?"  
  
Fawnlock tilted his head a little bit in addition to his response. "Yes?" He asked.  
  
"I... didn't want to tell you until after we'd gotten the whole heldua thing resolved, but..." John brought a hand to Fawnlock's face, feeling like he was about to burst with emotion. "I love you."  
  
When Fawnlock heard those words he felt his heart overflow with happiness. He felt breathless, and lighter than air. "I love you, John."  
  
The feeling amplified, to the point where John was certain that if he made a wrong move, he was going to either melt or combust. Still, he pressed Fawnlock's forehead against his own again, reveling in the warmth. "Don't you dare scare me like that ever again, okay?" he said with a small laugh. "I love you too much to lose you to that kind of demonic rage."  
  
Fawnlock nodded a little. "Okay. Won't. Fawnlock promise." He smiled.   
  
The moment between them vanished when the royal family had risen, and the king had caught their attention by clearing his throat slightly. Fawnlock looked to his parents and blushed deeply. " _Fawnlock..._ " His father began. " _Your inukom has proven to be a worthy... mate, for you._ "   
  
" _You have our blessing_." The queen told him.   
  
Fawnlock grinned and looked to John, "They are, okay!" He exclaimed.  
  
"Wha- With- with us? Are you serious?" John stammered, but before he allowed himself to get too excited, he looked over to Moosecroft. "Even...?"   
  
Although Moosecroft couldn't understand John's words, he could tell that he was waiting for his approval. Moosecroft shook his head and sighed, and then turned to Fawnlock. " _Tell it-- **him** , that as long as he doesn't do you or the forest any harm, he is safe,_" he said simply. " _And that I admire his courage_."  
  
Because he was so full of excitement, it was hard for Fawnlock to contain himself. "No hurt Fawnlock, or forest, and Moosecroft okay. He also likes brave John." He said.  
  
John smiled wide, and turned towards the family to bow. "Thank you," he said, despite the language differences. He was simply too thankful for everything that it hadn't even occurred to him. He gestured to the sack of vegetables still lying on the ground near the throne, and added: "And you can keep all of those if you want."

“ _John says thank you, and that you may keep the offerings._ ” Fawnlock told them.

The king simply chuckled, “ _Then tell him he is welcome to stay._ ” He said.

“ _Really?_ ” Fawnlock asked.

“ _Yes. You may stay in the village for the night. We will tell the council about your decision. And we will reconsider the ex-communication of inukom._ ” His father told him.

Fawnlock turned to John with a smile. “Father says we stay the night.”

“Really?” John asked, in absolute wonder of the shift in attitude. “You don’t want to head out now?”

“It is best.” Fawnlock assured him.

“Well alright then.” John said with a smile.

\--

The both of them scaled the tall tree they were standing inside moments before. John thought it was absolutely remarkable. It seemed crazy to John that Fawnlock would give up all of this, just to be with him in his dainty cottage. John had assumed that his people would be less sophisticated and that their city would be less intricate. And yet, they stood in the most complex and beautiful palace he had ever seen. From here they were shown to a room of their own.

John set down his things and observed the things around him. He saw more branches that made up makeshift furniture, like the bed, as well as a few things carved out of wood, like a couple of chairs. The bed was covered in leaves and cloth. It didn’t look practical to John, but it certainly looked comfortable. Anything would have sufficed at this point in their journey, for he was exhausted.  
  
So John made himself comfortable on the bed, shuffling a bit so that he was on his side, facing Fawnlock. He smiled fondly. "So... Mates, then," he said almost shyly.  
  
"Yes. Mates." Fawnlock repeated, sitting on the edge of the bed.  
  
Fawnlock touched his hand, and while he was still smiling, John turned his hand up so that he could properly weave his fingers with Fawnlock's. "I think I like that," he said, and then bit his lip. "No, actually, I _know_ I like that."  
  
Fawnlock smiled and gave John's hand a slight squeeze. "Me too."

"If someone had told me a few years ago, that one day I'd fall in love with a forest spirit, I'd think they'd gone mad," John said in an amused manner. "But now that it's happened, I wouldn't have it any other way."  
  
Fawnlock gave a soft hum, in response to the warmth John provided with his words. He then decided to join John on the bed. "I wouldn't, either. I never dreamt, that I would meet an inukom. Or love one. Fawnlock, love John."  
  
"I love you too," John said softly as he leaned in a bit closer, so that their faces were just barely touching. "And I've decided that I don't want to go back to my people either. Unless they come to me, I don't want anything to do with them."  
  
At that, Fawnlock smiled wider. He couldn't imagine his life getting any better. As far as Fawnlock was concerned, it would always be the two of them together. It might have been selfish thinking on Fawnlock's part, but he wanted to keep John to himself as much as he could. "Good. Only us."  
  
John could feel fluttery warmth spread through his body; a feeling he didn't want to get unfamiliar with any time soon. "I'm just... so glad everything turned out okay," he sighed as he squeezed Fawnlock's hand. "Not just with the family, but also the... less, pleasant... part."  
  
The smile faded a little. "I am... sorry, you saw." Fawnlock said, his expression full of shame.  
  
"Hey..." John began, moving his hand that was around Fawnlock to the spirit's cheek. "Don't apologise. I know that wasn't really you. And that you didn't mean what you said. Wolfiarty messed you up, that's all."  
  
Fawnlock swallowed a bit. "I... could have, hurt you." He said in a painful tone.  
  
"But you didn't," John responded immediately. "You fought back, and you won over. You resisted becoming a _demon_. That takes some brutal willpower."  
  
Slowly, Fawnlock's smile began to return. "John, helped."  
  
For some reason, John felt inclined to look away a bit as he blushed. "I... tried, at least. Suppose it did help, yeah."  
  
"My voice, for reason..." Fawnlock said before placing a small kiss on John's forehead.  
  
"I couldn't lose you to the demons just like that," John said shyly, shrinking a bit into himself at the kiss. He lowered his hand down from Fawnlock's face, so that he was now grasping the spirit's hand in both of his. "Not after everything we've been through."  
  
Fawnlock gave John a large smile and revealed a faint color to his cheeks. Never before had Fawnlock felt so loved and cared for in his entire life. "Thank you." Was all he could really say.  
  
"Any time," John replied. "Did scare me a bit, though. But it's over now." He brought their foreheads together, and for the first time, was the one to initiate a small nuzzle. He then let out a light giggle. "We're okay..."

When John had nuzzled him, Fawnlock's heart began to flutter. Another blush rose to his cheeks and he squirmed a little in happiness. He nodded just a little bit. "Yes. Okay." He agreed.

John smiled at Fawnlock's reaction, loving the way his ears flicked when he was particularly excited. "Well, you certainly seem happy," he commented, "not that I blame you." There was a brief silence, in which John had to lick his lips a bit to will himself to continue. "I promised you something, didn't I?"

Fawnlock tried his best to remain still, but it did not quell the excitement from within his being. It even showed in the slight movement of his tail. Because he was watching John so intently, he had barely noticed his own tongue darting out to meet his lips. He remembered John's promise, and felt as though he would burst from anticipation. "Yes." He breathed.

There was something about the way Fawnlock had (subconsciously or not) copied his action that made the spirit even more precious than he had ever been. "Alright then, let's not drag this on for much longer," John said as he brought his hand to Fawnlock's face again, only this time focusing more on the jaw. He had to tae a few deep breaths to steady himself, and then smiled. "Close your eyes."

As much as Fawnlock wanted to watch and catalogue every little thing John was doing, he obeyed John and closed his eyes. He focused on the feeling of John's warm hand on his face, and smiled a bit. Closing his eyes also caused Fawnlock to relax as he waited for John to fulfill his promise, and rid him of his dying curiosity.

Again John had to take a moment to breathe, simply because the anticipation was getting almost overwhelming. He gave Fawnlock's hand another squeeze, and then exhaled. "Okay, here goes," he said as he closed his own eyes and began leaning in, gently bringing Fawnlock closer as well. John's racing heartbeat pounded in his ears, and before he knew it, his lips were on Fawnlock's.

The moment John's lips met his own, Fawnlock could have sworn he felt a bolt of lightning struck him. The touch was completely foreign to him, and yet he couldn't stop to think about it. He didn't know what else to do but allow their lips remain together.  
  
John could tell that Fawnlock was more than a bit surprised, so he kept the kiss short and chaste in order not to startle him. He didn't want to let go just yet, though, so he gently traced his fingers down Fawnlock's jaw and to his neck, where he massaged a spot he had learned was particularly receptive to such a touch. John's heart didn't stop its rapid beating, and so he eventually had to start breathing loudly through his nose. He then figured that would sound suspicious, so he slowly pulled back, but still keept close. "S- sorry, I... I didn't mean to--" he stammered, having no idea where he was going with that.

When John pulled away, Fawnlock's eyes snapped open. Immediately, he wondered if he had done something wrong. He had been completely still and compliant, as John had kissed him. If only because he had no idea what else to do. As far as he knew, John hadn't done anything wrong either. He enjoyed each touch he had received. Fawnlock blinked, looking curiously at John. Perhaps being tranquil was the wrong way to go about this. So Fawnlock mirrored John's touch he had on his face. "Okay." He reassured John with a fond smile.

Feeling Fawnlock's hand on his face made John look up at him, and he calmed down just a bit. "Y- you are?" he said, somewhat nervously, and then let out a relieved sigh. "Oh. Good. For a moment there I thought I'd scared you or something."

Fawnlock shook his head a little. "No. Kisses... new. Good." He replied.

John moved his hand further up Fawnlock's face, and lightly traced his cheekbone with his thumb. "Then... would you like to try again?" he offered sheepishly.

The thumb John had moved ignited a large blush on Fawnlock's face. He nodded a little in response. "Yes." He said.

"Okay," John said with a small nod. "I'll try not to be so nervous this time." He leaned in again, and was very thankful to feel that his body had relaxed a little from before. At least this time he wouldn't be practically panting at the slightest contact. With that in mind, John made exactly that contact by gently bringing their lips together again.

As John came towards him, Fawnlock closed his eyes and allowed his own body to relax into John's touch. To his surprise, Fawnlock found the kiss to be different from the one before. He felt John's lips push and pull ever so slightly against his. The sensation was unlike anything he had ever experienced. And after a moment, Fawnlock did the same.

Now that Fawnlock was getting the hang of this, John felt much more comfortable with it, and was able to distance himself from the nervous feelings from before. He kept going, but never pressured too far, not just for Fawnlock's sake, but also his own. Moving his hand from Fawnlock's face to the back of his head, he massaged the scalp for good measure. And just to make sure Fawnlock knew he wouldn't be going anywhere, John entangled their legs as well.

Fawnlock discovered something else while he was kissing John; it was incredibly hard to smile while doing so. So it couldn't be helped, he had to suppress the urge while he felt John's legs weave with his. Never before had Fawnlock felt so happy and content than when he was with John. He loved the feeling of John's fingers running through his hair. So he did the same.

At the feeling of Fawnlock's fingers in his hair, John almost jumped in surprise. Somehow, though, he was able to suppress it, and instead let out a contented sigh, wanting to let Fawnlock know that he was happy. And he was. By God, he was. He didn't remember ever being so happy in his entire life. He wished there was some way he could demonstrate that to Fawnlock, but figured that this kiss was probably a good start.

Now that John was so close to him, Fawnlock felt his warmth. He didn't have to use his extra senses to know that John was just as happy (that's where the touching and kissing came in). Fawnlock continued to kiss and caress John in a state of absolute bliss.

John started to wish he had more hands, just so he would be able to keep running his fingers through Fawnlock's hair with one hand, keep another one on his neck, and using a third one to run up and down Fawnlock's sides, or at least wrap around him. Now, John had kissed a lot of times in his life, but just now did he realise that he had never put this amount of emotion behind it. It confirmed to him that this wasn't simply the excitement of exploring something foreign; he really was in love with a bloody forest spirit. And honestly, it made perfect sense. And he loved that. He really did love his Fawnlock.

Even though Fawnlock was starting to learn how to properly kiss, and enjoy every moment of it, he had to stop. He slowly pulled away from John's lips, and started to catch a little bit of the breath he had lost. When he met John's gaze, Fawnlock broke out into a grin. As John knew, Fawnlock still struggled with parts of the inukom language, but because he was observant he managed to pick out a few words here and there. And the one word that came to his mind was; "Amazing."

When Fawnlock pulled away, John was somehow simultaneously disappointed and relieved. Even though he loved every second of this, he wasn't sure how much longer he was going to last before feeling far too much emotion for his own good. John blushed deeply when Fawnlock spoke, and chuckled sheepishly. "Yes. Yes, it was," he said, and then decided to end the session with a small nuzzle. "And so are you."

Again, Fawnlock felt the heat rise to his cheeks. Especially so when John had nuzzled him; to which he responded appropriately by nuzzling him back. Fawnlock felt so much joy he could barely contain himself. He dragged his hand out of John's hair and placed it on his cheek. "You, too." He told him.

In a state of pure contentment, John simply had to close his eyes and rest his face against Fawnlock's. He moved his hand from Fawnlock's hair to his neck, where he kept it. "I try to be, love," he said softly. His eyes then shot up in realisation at what he had said. He really hadn't meant to use a word like that, no matter how flattering. "Is, uh... Is it okay if I call you that? 'Love'?"

Fawnlock was perplexed by John's statement, which he showed with a slight tilt of his head. He had no idea that one word could both be an endearment and an emotion. The question was on the tip of his tongue and then he realised, "Oh! John love Fawnlock. Fawnlock is John's... Fawnlock is love." He concluded, "Yes."

John smiled fondly at Fawnlock, lightly petting him under the jaw. "Good. That- that's good," he said, and then looked down a bit. "Say... Will you stay with me? Even when I'm an old man?" though the true question on his mind finally emerged, “Even if you have to give this all up?"

The questions didn't even have to be considered. Fawnlock looked at John and moved his thumb along John's cheek to grab his attention. It was a small reminder that not only was the eye contact respectful, but that Fawnlock wanted to see into his blue eyes. Once they were drawn to his, Fawnlock answered immediately, "Yes. Mates. Always with you." He assured him.

John had to will himself to look directly into Fawnlock's eyes as the latter replied, and then nodded. "Thank you," he said, refraining from mentioning the fact that apparently the harina could live several decades longer than humans. Which was mostly because he didn't want to think about that right now. He found Fawnlock's other hand and put his own over it, and smiled again. "I love you."

It felt wonderful to hear that phrase. Each time, Fawnlock could sense the pure emotion behind it. He was able to feel loved. More importantly, he was able to love John back. There were no more limits to how much or how often Fawnlock would be able to express it. And that's what he enjoyed the most about it. Fawnlock was sharing something that he had never thought he'd ever experience. Especially if he had chosen to live his life with the artaldea. He smiled back at John and replied, "I love you, too."

At that, John let out a long and contented sigh, all but basking in Fawnlock's warmth. It was clear to him that they were both equally happy, which somehow made the feeling even stronger. It then occurred to John that as immensely happy as they both were, they were also extremely tired, and he let out a small chuckle. "We probably could have made it back to the cottage in a few hours, but I just want to stay... right here..."

Fawnlock continued to hold John close, and began to shut his tired eyes. "Then stay..." He replied in a sleepy voice.

"I think I will, thanks," John responded, a sly smile on his face, as he pulled up the blanket and covered them both. "And I apologise in advance if I get any nightmares."

With the cloth encompassing them, their warmth seemed to amplify; which made it harder for Fawnlock to keep himself awake. Still, he registered John's words and replied. "Don't. I will make, bad dream go away. Simple."

John's smile softened, and he allowed himself to close his eyes again. "I know, I know," he told Fawnlock drowsily. "Still. Hate to wake you up like that all the time..."

Despite how tired he was, Fawnlock opened his eyes to look at John. Because John couldn't see him, he made sure he sounded as sincere as he felt. "Fawnlock will do, anything... for my John."

Not for the first time, John felt incredibly inferior to Fawnlock, because as much as he wished, he would never be able to match up to his abilities. He didn't mention that, however, as a voice in the back of his head reminded him that he had, just a couple of hours ago, sacrificed himself for Fawnlock, and then prevented him from becoming a demon. So that was at least something. "Same here," he said and then yawned, slowly petting his neck. "Now shush... need sleep..."

After making his point, and John proving his, Fawnlock smiled and closed his eyes again. He loved the feeling of John petting him. The motion was very soothing for him. And because of it, Fawnlock began to feel more and more like he was drifting off to sleep.

Slowly, John's hand began to still, and he felt his body start to go limp. Despite all that, he reached forward for one last small kiss to whatever spot he could reach (which was just below Fawnlock's lips), and then said in a hoarse voice: "G'night, Fawnlock. And... th'nk you..."

"Shh..." Fawnlock hushed. And before he could say or do anything else, he closed his eyes and allowed sleep to take him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for sticking with us! We hope you've enjoyed the latest chapter. I'm working on uploading the next one very soon as an apology. More will come soon! 
> 
> Inukom - Human.  
> Voji - Spirit.  
> Heldua - a crucial point in a spirit's life where they reach maturity.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the previous chapter, we had the lovely MarinaTitova draw Sonja and I a lovely piece of artwork based on this fic, which we highly encourage you to see. Thank you again, Marina!
> 
> http://marinatitova.tumblr.com/image/75482862665
> 
> Without further ado, here's the new installment! Remember if there are any vocabulary words you don't understand, consult the end of the chapter. If there are words we missed, just let us know.

The next day John woke up feeling entirely rejuvenated. He stretched a little before opening his eyes. Beside him was Fawnlock, who was beginning to stir. John smiled and ran his hand through Fawnlock’s curls. At that moment Fawnlock began to purr loudly, which caused John to chuckle.

When John had assessed where they were, he took in and let out a small sigh of contentment. “I must be dreaming.”

Upon hearing that, Fawnlock’s ears flicked a bit and he turned towards John. His translucent eyes bore into John’s thoughtfully.

“I just mean that everything seems so surreal. I can hardly believe I’m currently in the spirit realm inside a palace, made from a large tree that’s owned by royal forest spirits. And I’m resting beside my princely mate, who’s willing to give all of it up simply to stay by my side.” John said.

“I may be prince… but I had earned no place. No respect. Moosecroft, is ideal prince.” Fawnlock said as he tore his eyes from John.

John could tell it made Fawnlock uncomfortable to discuss this, so he tried to keep things a bit more positive. “Do you think the elders will reconsider their stance with my people?” He asked.

Fawnlock gave a slight shrug.

“Well, do you think it will change our situation?” John asked, trying to regain Fawnlock’s gaze.

“Possibly. But we at least have approval from family.”  Fawnlock responded. He knew that if enough elders voted against it, or decided on a different fate for them, he was at risk of losing John. But Fawnlock also knew that if his family had been truly won over, he would have a better chance.

At that, John smiled. “Well that’s good.” He said before leaning to kiss Fawnlock’s cheek.

Fawnlock closed his eyes and smiled at the small action. He took in John’s scent and gave a small hum. “Your scent is nice. Stronger.” He commented.

John chuckled a bit. “I’m glad you enjoy it. Since I’ve been wearing the same clothes for three days, it's no wonder my smell is stronger. To be honest, I can’t wait to head home and take a nice, long shower.”

“I must seek approval, before we leave.” Fawnlock reminded him.

“I know, I know.” John said before kissing Fawnlock on his head.

\--

Later, with John instructed to stay outside of the large palace; Fawnlock was left alone with the elders and the decisions of the king and queen. It was for the best, really, since John couldn’t understand a word anyways.

Fawnlock stood anxiously in the middle of the room, while the elders and his family surrounded him. He glanced around the room, gazing into the judgmental eyes of his elders. All of them were seated, and none of them looked particularly happy. Fawnlock feared for the worst.

A particular elder that Fawnlock knew, Anderfawn, narrowed his gaze when their eyes met. After a minute, the spirit stood up and spoke. “ _Upon hearing your story from your family, we’ve reached a mutual conclusion. You exposed our realm and our lands to an inukom and a vouk demon, and for disobeyed the traditions of your people. For that, you must be punished._ ” He said.

Fawnlock interrupted, “ _Are you forgetting that I disposed of said demon, and I proposed that I remove myself and the inukom from this realm?_ ” He asked.

“ _While you did kill the demon, you still have the potential to change into one yourself. Killing does terrible things to even the most noble of spirits, Fawnlock._ ” Anderfawn stated, “ _With that in mind, we also believe the inukom might come back to destroy our realm._ ”

“ _That doesn’t make any sense! John fought to protect me, and even went up against me as I was turning into a demon. Doesn’t any of that matter to you?”_ Fawnlock protested.

“ _What matters is how we protect ourselves. Do you not see the consequences of your actions? You drove Doelly mad with your selfishness, which lead Wolfiarty straight here. Now she is missing, our home was nearly destroyed, and now we’ve been exposed to an inukom._ ”Anderfawn said, fuming. “ _Just because you are royalty, doesn’t mean you can walk out of here unscathed._ ”

“ _And pray-tell, what is my scathing punishment, Anderfawn._ ” Fawnlock said through his teeth.

“ _If I had it my way, I would see to it that you would remain here and the inukom killed._ ” Anderfawn said quickly.

Moosecroft finally spoke up before Fawnlock could reply. “ _But your family simply wouldn’t agree with it. Your punishment, baby brother, is for your mate to be banished from our territory, and a temporary loss of your powers_. _Is_ _this agreeable to you, Fawnlock?”_

The statement caused Fawnlock to become silent. He simply nodded to his brother.

“ _Good. Once you are out of the realm, your powers will be drained from you. The effect will only last for a month or so. After that, they should return to you slowly._ ” Moosecroft told him. “ _Now go._ ”

With that, Fawnlock let go of his breath and turned away. Once he was out of sight Anderfawn turned to the other prince. “ _I don’t see why you all didn’t banish him as well_.” He said.

“ _Because Fawnlock will soon learn that inukoms have much more fragile lives than we do. And that will be his greater punishment. To live his life long after the inukom is gone._ ” Moosecroft replied. “ _He will be back. And he will need our help. Otherwise, we will be subjected to the most powerful destructive force the five realms will ever see._ ”

\--

“Well, I guess it was nice while it lasted.” John said after being informed of the elder’s decision. They exited the realm together, and when he looked back it only looked like an empty forest.

Fawnlock saw himself glow as he felt his power leave him and return to the forest floor. Once he stopped glowing, he saw John’s eyes on him. His mate gave a sympathetic shrug.

“It could be worse. One of us could be dead.” John reasoned with a small smile. Noticing Fawnlock didn’t return it; John put a hand on his back and led him back towards the cottage. “Come on, Fawnlock. Let’s go.”

\--

The longer Fawnlock stayed with John, the more he fell in love with him. Everything John did was more fascinating than the next. Even the most mundane things he had seen him do countless times; like tending to his garden. Fawnlock particularly enjoyed watching John as he pulled the vegetables from the earth on a hot summer day. John's scent was particularly strong when he worked, and Fawnlock liked it. But instead of staring from behind the trees, Fawnlock was watching from the front of the cottage.

John cursed the summer heat, the clear skies, and the trees not doing anything to help him not getting fried to death. John was actually surprised that his vegetables hadn't dried up in this heat, but figured that them surviving was Fawnlock's doing. Still, would it be too much to ask to get a bit of shade? Or some way to cool off?

The most John could do was throw everything off that covered his upper body, and even then he felt like he was melting. As he worked, he wiped some sweat off his forehead with his arm, and eyed Fawnlock, who was watching him intently. John huffed a small laugh. "I see you're enjoying yourself..." he said, half-panting, as the heat made him much more tired than he normally would have been.

Fawnlock blushed a little upon hearing that, and he couldn't fight the small smile that crept up on his face. "Yes, well..." He trailed, unable to find a proper response. Then Fawnlock remembered his nearly forgotten task. He drew nearer to John with a glass of water in his hand. "Here, drink."

As soon as John saw the glass, he got more excited about it than was humanly possible. "Oh God, yes..." he breathed as he took it, pressing it against his face before doing anything else. The cool feeling was amazing, and after a few seconds of this, John drained the glass in two large gulps. He let out a satisfied sigh, and then patted Fawnlock's shoulder. "Fawnlock, I bloody love you."

"Love you too." Fawnlock responded before taking the empty glass from John's hand. "You work hard. Rest now." He told John as he drew closer to him. When he breathed, John's scent filled his nose and lungs. It was intoxicating. It caused him to lean down and place a kiss on John's cheek.

John smiled and reached over to lightly scratch under Fawnlock's chin before pulling back. "Is that a recommendation or a demand?" he said, somewhat teasingly.

Fawnlock gave a lazy smile, which disappeared slightly when John pulled his hand away. "Recommendation. I like to watch. You smell good, too." He told him as he tried to close the gap between them again. The closer he was to John, the stronger the scent. He gave John an open-mouthed kiss on his cheek, but didn't pull away before brushing his tongue against him.

Because Fawnlock came back for another kiss, John found he had to start scratching him again. He let out a small, surprised "oh!" when Fawnlock licked him, and blushed a bit. "Haa... Not sure you want to do that," he said sheepishly. "I'm all sweaty."

"Mmm. Want to..." Fawnlock disagreed with a small grin. He held John's upper arm with his free hand, and did it again. Without hesitation Fawnlock drew his tongue along the edge of John's jaw until he reached his ear lobe, where the scent became stronger. "Your taste is sweet." He told John.

John shivered, the feeling of Fawnlock's tongue on his skin tickling him like nothing he had ever experienced. He giggled for a few seconds as Fawnlock moved about, and then spoke. "You must have- pff- really weird taste buds, then," he snorted, remembering now that his neck and ears were very sensitive to touch, and Fawnlock's licks were tickling him even more there.

Fawnlock only responded by continuing to lap up John's sweat on the side of his face. It was getting harder for him to pull away, so he didn't. Not yet. Something in him wanted to continue licking him until John was rid of the layer of sweat.

The more Fawnlock licked, the more difficult it was for John to suppress his snorts, but he couldn't tear himself way, since Fawnlock really seemed to like this. Even if John found it to be very odd, all things considered. Personally, John would always associate sweat with salt, so it was a complete mystery to him how on earth Fawnlock found him to taste sweet. Nevertheless, he allowed it, even though it tickled him like mad. "Are you seriously going to lick me clean?" he managed between giggles.

The sweet scent Fawnlock had smelled all afternoon tasted even better. He wasn't ready to let up quite yet. He marked his tongue on John's neck before moving along his collarbone. Fawnlock placed another open-mouthed kiss on the edge of John's scar before finally snapping out of his fixation. "Would... if you let me." He admitted.

"Well, you would, wouldn't you?" John chuckled before shivering again as Fawnlock reached his scar. "Y'know, sometimes I wish I was a harina, just so I could adapt to the weather and nature as well as you do."

Fawnlock froze and stood up to properly look at John. He gave a small frown before he replied. "No." Was all he said before turning away and walking back to the cottage.

John perked at that, confused at the sudden mood swing. "Hey, wha--" He pursed his lips, and against his better judgement followed the spirit. "Fawnlock, what's the matter?"

When Fawnlock was in the cottage he stopped mid-stride and set the glass on the table. He turned to John, still wearing his frown. "To be, harina... not good at all." He told him.

"Yeah, I figured, with all your rules and traditions and isolation and whatnot," John said plainly. "Still, I think it'd be nice not to sweat a stream in the summer, or freeze in the winter."

Fawnlock shook his head. He still found it ridiculous that John would wish that upon himself. "Fur sometimes difficult. You would not like it."

"Why not? Can't be any worse than walking around in just skin, can it?" John offered, though he had a feeling that Fawnlock would be ready with a reply of his own.

"It can. It is. I would get rid of fur, if I could." Fawnlock expressed.

And now John had to laugh. "What if we took a day and traded places? You'd be human and I'd be harina," he said in an amused manner. "Then we would definitely know which parts were good and which annoying. How cool would that be?"

Fawnlock frowned even more. "You speak of powerful magic. And if you did, you would not survive." He stated as though it were a fact.

John was silent for a few seconds, his eyes widening as Fawnlock spoke. He then shook his head in disbelief. "I... didn't think it was actually possible," he admitted, and looked up to smile at Fawnlock. "If it makes you feel any better, I was just having a go, okay? I don't really want to turn into something else." He left the 'even if I like the idea in theory' part implied.

There was a small pause for a moment before Fawnlock spoke. He wasn't sure if he wanted to admit it, but he found himself doing it anyways. "... I do." He said firmly.

John raised his eyebrows, surprised to hear that. "Really? Into what?" he asked.

"Into human." Fawnlock told him.

"Are you serious?" John huffed, and then noticed that Fawnlock was very much so. John's features softened. "Oh wow. That's... really not something I'd recommend."

Fawnlock's ears flicked in annoyance. "It is what I want." He said as he crossed his arms.

"But why?" John had to ask. "It's so plain and tedious. You'd just get bored with it."

"I no longer want to be harina. I am no longer with artaldea." Fawnlock said, "I have chosen life with you."

"I- I know, but... Come on. Human?" John commented, trying to raise a better argument than he was going for. Apparently it wasn't working. "You can have a life with me and still be harina. And if the whole procedure is as dangerous as you say, then I wouldn't want you to risk it."

"Don't care. I want a mortal, human life." Fawnlock said.

"Well, I care," John replied, folding his own arms. "And I didn't save you from demon rage just so you could go and get yourself killed by some different kind of magic."

For a good few moments of silence, Fawnlock only glared in John's direction. He had been determined to change into a human. But when John put up his defenses, Fawnlock knew he wasn't going to win this argument with force. So he brought down his arms and looked at John with a sad look. "I... only want to be close, John."

"And you can be," John told him; his own arms feeling like they had a life of their own and were telling him to unfold them. "As close as you want - as you need - without you being human. We've come this far already, right?"

Fawnlock didn't answer. He looked away and to the floor of the cottage. Fawnlock wanted to believe John, but he found that he simply couldn't. He wished with every part of his being that he had been human. Since the day he had moved in, he believed his life would have been much more simple and freeing if he had been human. He never would have had the difficulties of their language barrier, and they wouldn't have had to deal with the artaldea. The two of them probably would have met in the nearby inukom village, where they would have shared and expressed their love for the outdoors. It would have been so much easier.

As the silence drew out, John could tell that Fawnlock was fighting some kind of inner battle with himself about all this. He wished there was something he could do to convince the spirit that he was just perfect the way he was, and that John wouldn't want him to change at all. So he lowered his arms and took a step closer. "Fawnlock," he said softly. "Look at me."

The moment John commanded it, Fawnlock looked up from the floor and straight to John's eyes.

John gently brought his hands to Fawnlock's face, and reached upwards to place a small kiss on his lips. "I'm serious," he said after pulling away. "I don't want either of us to change. And I really don't know how else to say that, other than telling you more than usual that I love you just the way you are."

Fawnlock felt a blush creep to his face upon hearing those words. "Even though... we are different?" He asked cautiously, as though the answer would be something he didn't want to hear.

"Especially because we're different," John responded instantly. "That alone makes everything more special to me. Besides, how many ordinary humans can say that they've not only gotten a forest spirit to help their soil, but also had the honour of becoming one's mate?" He smiled. "Not that many, I reckon."

At that, Fawnlock felt a small smile tug on the edge of his mouth. He couldn't help himself as he leaned down, placed his forehead on top of John's and gently nuzzled him. He felt ten times better than before, and nothing could change that.

John ran his hands down Fawnlock's face and neck before wrapping his arms around him, nuzzling back. "Okay?" he said with a fond smile. "So no more thinking like that; like you're not worth it or something just because you're different. Why else do you think I fell in love with you?"

Fawnlock continued to smile and blush deeply. "Different. Okay." He said with a small nod. "I love you."

"I love you too, you silly deer," John said, bringing one hand to the back of Fawnlock's head to lightly scratch it. "And I'll keep telling you until it get it into your crazy brain."

The smile turned into a grin and he leaned into John's touch. How could he have been so foolish?

John scratched Fawnlock's head for a couple of more seconds, an amused grin on his face. "Now, shall I go back to work? I know you like watching, so you're free to come along too," he said in a somewhat teasing tone.

The warmth never left Fawnlock's cheeks as John spoke to him. "Okay." He replied, unashamed in taking pleasure in watching (and smelling) John while he worked. Fawnlock was lead out into the garden where they spent the rest of their day.

\--

Fawnlock's ears perked up at the sound of a small knock on the door of the cottage. Instinctually, he looked towards the door and froze in his place. His heart began to pound fiercely, and he felt panic rise up inside him. John was in the cottage. Therefore, there was an unknown person or creature at the door.

John on the other hand simply looked up from his reading as if nothing were more common. Granted, he didn't get visitors all that often - and hadn't gotten one in months - but it was such a normal thing that he didn't think too much of it. Besides, the only visitor he got was Mrs Hudson, so there wasn't much to think about anyway. He stood up from the couch and walked towards the door, but stopped midway when he saw how frightened Fawnlock was. So for the moment, John approached him. "Hey," he said softly as he reached for Fawnlock's hand. "It's okay, you don't need to be scared."

When John placed his hand upon Fawnlock's, he jerked his head towards John before calming down considerably. Though John was offering his comfort, Fawnlock didn't feel all that reassured. He confirmed this by quickly looking back at the door when he heard another knock. He was absolutely silent as he grabbed John's hand and began to fade out of the inukom realm. All Fawnlock could think about was to; hidehidehidehide.

"Fawnlock!" John whispered as he felt himself disappear as well. He squeezed the spirit's hand to get him to stop fading, or at least to let him go. "I can't go to another realm now; I need to see who's at the door. Maybe it's the lady who owns the cottage, coming to say hi." He smiled, trying once more to get Fawnlock to stay in the human realm. "And if it is her, I'm sure she'd love to meet you."

Fawnlock looked at John and didn't sense any initial fear. He released John's hand, but was unsure of what to do. It was in his nature to keep hidden unless he felt comfortable enough to be seen. Fawnlock fidgeted in his place as John left to answer the door. He didn't want to leave John alone with the stranger, but he was also a bit scared. And yet, Fawnlock gathered up his courage and found himself standing beside John.

John smiled proudly when he saw that Fawnlock had decided to accompany him after all, and offered him his hand again. "If it's anyone else, or a threat of any kind, I'll kick them in the shins. Okay?" John told him in a reassuring way as he reached for the door handle.

When he heard that, Fawnlock smiled with a small nod and took John's hand. "Okay." He said.

With that, John gave Fawnlock's hand a small squeeze and opened the door, now anticipating anything, even the worst. As it turned out, he didn't need to be worried, as it was, in fact, only Mrs Hudson, as he had expected. He smiled at her. "Ah. Good afternoon, Mrs Hudson," John greeted. "It's been a while."

"Good aftern--" Mrs Hudson started to say. Everything she had intended to say died in her throat as soon as she caught a glance of Fawnlock. "Oh my..." She breathed with a smile.

Fawnlock fully observed the woman before locking eyes with her. She was old, and didn't appear to be a threat. They stood in silence for a few moments, until the woman began to feel a little uncomfortable under his gaze. "Hello there..." She greeted.

"...Hello." Fawnlock responded, which caused Mrs Hudson to grin.

John smiled at the two of them, and then turned to Mrs Hudson again. "So yes, remember the spirit I told you about?" he said, gesturing to Fawnlock. "This is him. If that wasn't already obvious."

"Oh that's wonderful!" Mrs Hudson exclaimed. "What's his name?" She asked John.

Fawnlock felt a little insulted that she hadn't asked him, so he spoke up. "Fawnlock." He told her.

Mrs Hudson looked a bit surprised, but ultimately smiled at Fawnlock. "Fawnlock, what a lovely name for such a majestic creature." She praised.

After hearing that, Fawnlock forgave the woman and subconsciously stood up taller.

John let out a small chuckle and let go of Fawnlock's hand to he could pat him on the back a bit. "Yup. Been here since he could reach my hips, pretty much," he continued. He then shook his head, knowing how distracted they both were, and moved himself and Fawnlock out of the way. "Sorry, I'm completely forgetting my manners. Please, come in, if you want."

"Thank you, and don't worry about it, deary." Mrs Hudson responded politely as she walked inside. Fawnlock studied her as she made her way into the room. "So, tell me how you two managed to end up here. It's my understanding that spirits are very kept to themselves."

"Oh yeah, and Fawnlock's no exception," John told Mrs Hudson as he closed the door behind her and led Fawnlock back inside. "That is, he's really kept to himself. To the point that he didn't even want to be with his tribe half the time. Did get into some trouble for it, so there's that." As John spoke, he somewhat subconsciously brought his hand to the back of Fawnlock's neck and shoulders to pet him there.

As soon as he felt John's hand on him, Fawnlock's mouth quirked up in a small smile. He adored the feeling of John petting him. So much, that he leaned a bit into his touch.

Mrs Hudson grew a curious expression. "I see. Well then let's have a sit down so you can tell me all about it, shall we?" She asked as she sat on the nearest chair. Once they were all seated, Mrs Hudson listened intently to John and Fawnlock's story. They told her nearly everything that had happened to them. Up to the point where they had been living together after confronting the artaldea.

"You are a brave man, John," Mrs Hudson told him. "For not only going into the spirit realm, but confronting Fawnlock's demon..."

"Yeah, well, I had to, didn't I?" John replied as he ran a hand through his hair. "Couldn't have made the whole sacrificing thing too pointless."

A soft smile appeared on Mrs Hudson's face. "You're truly a hero, John. Not just to Fawnlock, but to his people and the relationship between the two. We might just be able to repair the bond that's been broken." She said.

Fawnlock tensed a little not only because Mrs Hudson had said the word 'bond' but because the idea was furthest from his intensions. He felt a small heat rise to his face. "Bond? No, no bond. No repair. No harina." He told Mrs Hudson, who looked very confused.

John found himself blushing furiously at that, and decided to cut in. "Oh, yes, maybe I should mention..." he said awkwardly before clearing his throat. "See, um... What he means is that... Well, Fawnlock doesn't want to go back to being with his own kind. The harina, that is. That's what they're called.”

“To him, this whole human-spirit nonsense that's been going on doesn't really matter, and he doesn't care about it. It's why he's here with me now. He's decided to- to stay with me. Wasn't really his business to repair anything; he just set out to get what he wanted, and he did. And, uh... Don't- don't say the word 'bond', Mrs Hudson. It doesn't have the same meaning to the harina..." he concluded as he shrunk a bit into himself, hoping that he wouldn't have to be the one to explain it.

"Oh... I see..." Mrs Hudson said slowly as she considered things. "How unusual. A spirit that wants nothing to do with its kind... Well, I suppose that's the reason he was drawn to you, John." She said with a small smile.

"You could say that, yes," John agreed with a small shrug. "I still haven't figured out why he came to me of all people, though," he added, turning to Fawnlock as he spoke.

Fawnlock looked back at John. "Your scent, was new and sweet. I never saw inukom before. Curious." He told John.

John reached out to put a hand over Fawnlock's, smiling fondly at him. "Then I'm really glad you decided to give into that curiosity," John told him.

At that, Fawnlock smiled back at John. After a moment's pause Mrs Hudson spoke again, "It makes me wonder, though... Exactly what did your kind do to you, for you to turn away from them?" She asked.

The smile Fawnlock wore vanished, and remained quiet for long a period of time.

While John wasn't exactly certain about the answer himself, he had a feeling that it was a touchy subject, and not something that Fawnlock would want to discuss with a stranger. "Let's just say... they weren't particularly nice to him," he said and gave Fawnlock's hand a little squeeze.

"I see." Mrs Hudson replied softly.

When Fawnlock felt John's hand squeeze his he began to smile again. Trust John to understand the delicacy of Fawnlock's situation. It only made him adore the man even more.

"So yes, there's that, and..." John bit his lip, momentarily thinking he was about to reveal too much. Would it be appropriate? Did he want to say it? Did Fawnlock want it out in the open? "Well, there's another reason now why he doesn't want to go back to his tribe. And why he's living here," he said and he looked down, feeling himself blush even more.

"Oh? And what's that, deary?" Mrs Hudson asked.

"I, uh... Okay, so it may sound a bit strange to you, but..." John attempted, absent-mindedly tightening his hold on Fawnlock's hand nervously. "Not that I think it's strange or anything, it's just- not something you'd expect. By a long shot. And- and it sort of goes against everything I've said in the past and---" He cut himself off, feeling like his face was about to boil. "Fawnlock?"

Mrs Hudson looked very confused, but still willing to listen. Fawnlock disliked how John wasn't being specific, so Fawnlock spoke, "We are, mates." He told her.

"Oh well that's nice. It's good that you're better friends, especially after such an ordeal." Mrs Hudson smiled.

John could have whimpered from the awkwardness he was feeling at this moment. "N- no. No, it's not just that," he somehow managed to say even though he could have sworn his throat was shrinking. "Mates, as in- as in how animals- have their... m- mates..."

When Mrs Hudson heard that her smile faded and she blushed deeply. "O- Oh, oh my." Was all she said when she looked between the two. "But... he's a- a spirit, John. And he's at least partly ani--" She stopped herself when she saw Fawnlock's brow lower. "Well, to be honest we are just as animal like... Still, there's lore and rules about that sort of thing. Humans and spirits can live side by side but..."

The more Mrs Hudson spoke, the more John could feel his initial nervousness drain out of him. "But what? That's what we're doing. What we have been doing, and what I know we will be doing for the next years," he said, now feeling much more confident about his situation. "Just because there's a more emotional connection, doesn't mean it's any less moral or pure than any other relationship."

"I don't mean it like that, John. What I'm trying to say is that a spirit needs to be among its kind. Its simply nature. If you take something away from its home, there's no telling what will happen." Mrs Hudson said as gently as she could.

Fawnlock decided to speak up, "Fawnlock, lived away from arteldea for years. I do not need them. Not like John." He said to her.

"Exactly," John said, proud of Fawnlock for having stood up for himself. "And plus, I'm pretty far away from my home too, but you don't see me snapping from lack of human contact. Also, I didn't take anything; Fawnlock came here on his own accord. It was a mutual decision."

Mrs Hudson paused for a moment before speaking again. "Of course. Yes. Well then, far be it from me to tell you both how to live your lives. ...As long as you're happy." She said.

"Yes. Very." Fawnlock told her.

John nodded in agreement, and then looked at Mrs Hudson with a hurtful expression. "Funny, I... I never expected you of all people not to be okay with this," he said.

"I'm sorry, John. While I love the spirits, I know there's a natural order of things." Mrs Hudson told him. "But if it's what you both want, then do that."

"It is," John said determinedly as he grasped Fawnlock's hand with both of his. "And we will. You can count on that. Right, Fawnlock?"

"Yes." Fawnlock said immediately with a small smile. Despite what he was saying, Fawnlock couldn't help but reflect on what Mrs Hudson was trying to say. For years, before he had met John, Fawnlock had a very similar mind-set. He had been led to believe that there was a natural order, and that inukom were the lesser being. But now that he was in love with one; he wanted to be more like him. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anderlock was added in after seeing Flyingrotten's lovely Anderfawn and Fawnlock piece here:
> 
> http://flyingrotten.tumblr.com/post/71562780462/
> 
> Again, thanks for reading! We really appreciate all of your feedback!
> 
> Inukom - Human.  
> Vouk - Wolf spirit.  
> Harina - Deer spirit.  
> Elder - a term to describe any forest spirit older than the spirit speaking. A spirit may be regarded this as a sign of respect.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So because I promised an early update last time, here's an actual early update. If you're confused about any vocabulary, feel free to consult the bottom of the page.

It had been days since Mrs Hudson's visit, and yet Fawnlock couldn't stop thinking about what had been said on that day. Fawnlock had been so concentrated on his thoughts; he had abandoned his desire to eat in order to think. He was lying down on the couch, immersed in his own thoughts.

Fawnlock couldn't help but think on what would have happened if he had been inukom, or if the rest had been harina. Things seemed so much easier when he imagined himself as human. With his powers mostly gone, he figured it wouldn’t have been that much different. He wouldn't have seen that contorted and discomforting expression on Mrs Hudson, and they would have been fully accepted. Not only that, but further down the road seemed brighter as well. Fawnlock and John would be able to grow older together. Everything just made more sense that way.

As the days went on, John became increasingly worried about Fawnlock. The spirit was being much more distant than usual, quieter than ever, and had even stopped eating, which made John very concerned.

At first he had thought that Fawnlock was sick, but upon further inspection, that turned out to be false. Despite that, though, nothing John did would bring Fawnlock out of this state, and he was becoming afraid that he would end up wasting away eventually, due to malnutrition. It was already starting to show a little bit, even through Fawnlock's fur.

John finally decided to approach the spirit and voice his concern. He hovered over him a bit, willing him to open his eyes to look up at him at least. "You're really falling behind on your food, you know," he commented. "It's really not healthy."

Fawnlock had been curled in on himself, facing towards the ceiling with his hands clasped together and pressed to his lips. He opened his icy-blue eyes to meet John's hard gaze. "Don't care." He told him, "Thinking."

"Yeah, I can see that," John told him, "but that doesn't mean you can just stop functioning for days on end." There was a small pause, in which John thought over his words. "Does it?"

There was no response from Fawnlock except a small lift of a brow. He then closed his eyes, fully expecting John to leave him at that point. When he didn't hear him leave, he finally spoke up. "Go away."

John frowned. He had never seen Fawnlock act this way, and briefly wondered if it had to do with the season or something. But he quickly tossed it aside for the thought that Fawnlock was simply being a tit. "Fine. Excuse me for worrying," he said as he backed away from the couch. "Don't have to be so moody about it."

"Quiet. Need quiet." Fawnlock told him through his teeth. He needed silence in order to think, and because he wasn't getting that, he was growing more agitated by the second.

John bit back any reply he was about to say, and simply rolled his eyes. Trust someone like Fawnlock to act so uptight about something so easily obtainable as silence. "You're sounding more royal by the second..." John muttered.

Fawnlock's ears twitched and his eyes shot open. That was the final straw. Without warning he sat up from the couch and headed straight for the cabin door.

"Oh what now?" John all but sighed, conveniently ignoring the small stab of guilt in his stomach. "What's gotten into you lately?"

Fawnlock didn't bother to grace John with an answer. He simply paused at the door to give John a glaring look and then left the cabin. He didn't even bother to close the door. He just wanted to get outside again. The forest was his sanctuary.

Oh hell. John walked over to the still open door, planning to follow the spirit to get at least a solid answer out of him, but stopped himself. He leaned against the door frame and ran a hand through his hair with a small sigh. Well, if Fawnlock wanted to be alone, then John didn't want to get in his way, no matter how sulky he was acting. He only wished that Fawnlock could have told him what was on his mind, or if John was doing something wrong.

Maybe he shouldn't have said anything. With a slightly heavy feeling in his gut, John said "Take your time, then..." to no one in particular, and went back inside the cottage, closing the door behind him.

\--

Time had passed and the day was growing dark. Fawnlock had wandered the forest with no intended destination. He didn't wander too far, though, as he could still smell John's faint scent. But it was far enough that he could no longer see the cottage.

Fawnlock was never really lost when he wandered the woods, but he found himself in a place he had never often visited. He could tell it was an ancient place from the thick and enormous trees. It didn't matter to him where he was, as long as he was in a proper environment to think. Fawnlock eventually settled near the base of one of the trees in a large clearing and began to think again.

What was supposed to be a good rest turned out to be nothing more than a simple snooze, as there was some movement on the ground near where Vixene slept. Granted, her tree was rather high, and the branch she was currently on far enough from the ground, but she could still hear footsteps nearby. Not only that, but a few huffs and puffs, as if someone was either extremely tired or extremely annoyed. Despite her interrupted sleep, Vixene grinned to herself at the thought of something having wandered to her area; it always brought about some kind of excitement, no matter the species.

She stretched a bit, and decided to have a look down to see what she was up against, pleasently surprised to see a deer of all things. A harina in this area? Interesting... she thought to herself as she slowly slid down the tree to have a better look. Hm. From the looks of things, it was a male - definitely a plus - and not too young either, though possibly just having reached adulthood. Honestly, it was hard to tell. Vixene watched him intently, trying to figure out why her senses were telling her that she knew him for some reason.

Fawnlock's ears perked at the sound of something in the tree above him. He looked above where he saw a white figure moving about in the branches. Fawnlock immediately stood up from his place so he could get a better look. He saw a flash of a graceful tail and immediately assumed it was another vouk. Because of that Fawnlock's guard went up even further. He stood his ground as the voji climbed down the tree.

Vixene sniffed the air for a moment, and could both smell and sense a bit of fear in the harina. She decided to have the first word. " _You must not see a lot of folk outside your kind if this is your reaction to a simple lisica,_ " she told him slyly.

A lisica. Even though she wasn't a vouk, Fawnlock still kept his guard up. After all, he had never seen many lisica before. " _I thought you were a vouk._ " He told her, and then glanced around. " _I did not realise this is lisica territory. I'll be on my way._ " He said with a slight bow.

" _Oh, don't make such a fuss,_ " Vixene said as she batted one hand. " _I never said you weren't welcome. So go on, enlighten me. What's a handsome young harina like you doing in a place like this?_ "

Fawnlock stood upright and felt his face flush slightly. " _I was trying to get some peace of mind, and think to myself._ " He told her.

Vixene climbed all the way down the tree so she could stand next to the other voji and look at him properly. Oh yes, definitely young. " _On your own?_ " she said as she circled him a bit to try and get a better picture. " _And so far away from your kind?_ "

" _Yes. I find silence to be very soothing._ " Fawnlock told her as he kept an eye on her.

" _Solitude too, I bet,_ " Vixene continued, looking the harina over, very impressed with what she saw. " _No mate or anything?_ "

" _Well... Yes. But I prefer to be alone._ " Fawnlock said.

That made Vixene put up a bit of a disappointed pout, and she tisked. " _Well, that's not very nice, now is it?_ " she said, positioning herself in front of him now, her hands on her hips. " _Does she know about you running off like this? And about you apparently not appreciating her? I know I would be devastated if I found out my mate preferred being alone than with me._ "

Fawnlock was irritated that the lisica was talking to him like this; especially considering that he didn't know her. " _My mate knows I've left, yes. I just wanted to be left alone to my own thoughts._ " He said.

Vixene's mouth curled up into a grin, and she had to fight the urge to touch the harina's fur, if only to be able to say she'd done it. " _She must be very loyal to trust you this much,_ " she told him. " _I wonder what she would think of you having met me..._ "

The moment he heard that, Fawnlock's brow quirked but he remained looking unimpressed. " _Yes, **he** is rather loyal. Just as well as I am._ " He told her before turning away. " _Now if you'll excuse me..._ "

" _Now hold on a minute,_ " Vixene said as she gave in, and grabbed the harina by the arm. " _You're not getting out of here until you at least what brought you here in the first place. Aside from the whole 'I need to think' nonsense, which frankly is far too cryptic an answer for me._ "

Fawnlock's fur bristled with anger when the lisica touched him. " _Do not touch me,_ " He growled as he jerked his arm away from her grasp. " _Why should you care what brought me here? And why should I tell you?_ "

Vixene complied, but instead of letting go of him immediately, she lightly ran her fingers down his arm before taking her own back. " _Well, maybe I could help you out somehow,_ " she told him, and then added: " _And before you say something like 'I don't need your help'; how would you know what I could do for you if you didn't tell me first?_ "

" _Why are you so keen on helping me?_ " Fawnlock asked, frowning. " _Do you know all the answers or are you that desperate for a mate?_ "

" _Maybe I am, or maybe I'm just genuinely kindhearted,_ " Vixene replied, her grin ever present. " _Or maybe I'd simply like to do you a favour so that I'd know that in the future, you would owe me one. But I think that's thinking a bit too far, don't you? And if you don't want my help, the least you could do is vent. I'm sure your mate would like to have you back with less steam coming out of your ears._ "

Fawnlock's mouth opened to protest, but then closed fairly quickly. He decided that she had a fair point. " _...Alright. But first, I'd like to know who you are._ " He said.

Vixene's grin widened for a second as she realised she had been victorious. " _Fair enough. I suppose I've been a bit rude, so here,_ " she said and bowed. " _My name is Vixene, and while I don't exactly rule these parts, I certainly like them. And what about yourself?_ "

" _My name is Fawnlock._ " He introduced with a bow of his own.

As soon as the harina uttered his name, Vixene's ears perked and she stood up straight. " _Fawnlock, huh? As in prince I-do-what-I-want Fawnlock?_ " she asked him.

Fawnlock stood up properly and twitched his ear in annoyance. " _I see even this part of the forest is no stranger to harina tales..._ " He muttered. " _But yes, I am-- was the prince._ "

" _Are you honestly surprised?_ " Vixene scoffed. " _It wouldn't surprise me if your whole demon ordeal will be a legend one day. Or a bedtime story. Either one works, I guess._ " She smiled. " _So. Fawnlock. You have something heavy on your mind_."

" _Well, if you didn't know already, I should probably start by explaining that my mate is an inukom._ " Fawnlock told her.

Vixene chuckled. " _Ah, yes. I heard something about that. Though I wasn't sure if I wanted to believe it,_ " she said. " _Now how on earth did that happen, I wonder? And how would you know it's a male?_ " She gasped playfully. " _Nooo! Have you bonded? Is that how you know?_ "

Fawnlock looked horrifyingly at Vixene. " _O- of course not! I know because of his scent._ " He sputtered with a deep blush. " _And the simple fact is that we... we fell in love. That's how we became mates._ "

" _Without bonding? Hm. I never would have thought_ ," Vixene said with a small shrug. " _Oh well, whatever makes you happy, I suppose. Now. You were saying something about thinking. Does it have everything to do with your inukom mate, or just a little bit?_ "

" _Yes. I was thinking about how much easier things would have been if we had been the same species._ " Fawnlock admitted. " _I never liked being harina. So I was just wondering if it were possible to become inukom._ "

" _Oh, haven't we all..._ " Vixene said dreamily before looking at Fawnlock. " _You would wonder about something like that, wouldn't you? I suppose I don't blame you, though. Must be tough having an inukom mate and not being able to do anything properly with it. Him, sorry,_ " she added with a smirk.

" _It's not just that..._ " Fawnlock told her quickly, the blush returning to his face. " _It's the language barrier, and the fact that both our kinds won't accept us being together. Also... I don't want to watch him die._ " He said quietly.

Vixene kept her smug expression up as Fawnlock spoke, but it faded slightly when he came to the last part. " _Oh, that's right. Inukom don't live for very long,_ " she said thoughtfully. She then pursed her lips together and shook her head. " _I didn't expect there to be an emotional motive. Not for you, at least._ "

Fawnlock's blush deepened further. " _I didn't ask to be patronised, I was willing to share for an offer of help_." He said with a large frown.

" _You're right, I apologise,_ " Vixene said with a nod. She looked upwards and heaved a sigh. " _There is one thing I can offer, but it won't come near to solving all your problems_."

Fawnlock looked at her curiously. " _You... think you can help me? How?_ "

" _There's a reason I live by myself, you know_ ," Vixene told him. " _You see, I may have misbehaved a bit too much in the past and committed a very hateful crime. It didn't last very long, but the act was enough to get me kicked out, so to say._ "

As far as Fawnlock knew, lisica were very mischievous, but very relaxed voji. To have done something and be exiled for it, meant that it had to have been very serious. This made Fawnlock feel a little uneasy. " _What did you do?_ " He asked.

Vixene shrugged nonchalantly. " _Oh a little of that, a little of this. Mingled with one too many inukom, I suppose. And when I say 'mingle' I'm being delicate, of course_ ," she said and winked. " _Oh and perhaps I should mention... I was inukom the whole time as well._ "

Fawnlock's eyes widened when he heard that. " _Y- You were inukom...? But how?_ " He asked.

" _I told you, I misbehaved,_ " Vixene said smugly. " _Acquired a bit of extra magic from here and there; different voji, different magic. The whole thing is supposed to be lethal, and even if done correctly, I hear it could kill a spirit in a matter of minutes. I managed to keep my inukom form for days before the effects wore off, so I suppose I did something right_."

Fawnlock drew closer to Vixene. " _Is there any way you can replicate it?_ " He asked.

" _Are you sure you're willing to take that risk?_ " Vixene asked with one eyebrow raised. " _Harina are inherently more fragile than lisica. There's no telling what this kind of magic could do to you, even if I did everything exactly as I did it to myself._ "

" _I want to do it. I don't believe that I have been placed with John by chance. And I don't believe our meeting was chance either. I need to do this._ " Fawnlock told her with determination in his eyes.

" _You do realise that it won't be permanent, though, don't you?_ " Vixene pointed out, momentarily taken aback by the mention of a name. A very odd one at that. " _I'm not sure how long it could last for someone like you, but it's temporary._ "

" _I don't care. I want to be inukom even if it's only for a fraction of a second. You must help me_." Fawnlock told her.

Vixene sighed, simultaneously impressed with and worried about Fawnlock's determination. She wondered if he had always been this difficult. And spoiled. " _Alright. I'll see what I can do_ ," she told him. " _But you have to be certain. There's a chance I could kill you, and your mate will never know what even happened._ "

Fawnlock paused slightly. He knew of the consequences of never seeing John again. He also knew John would be devastated if he died. But this was important to him. He nodded at Vixene. " _I understand. And I still want to go through with it._ " He told her.

For all his apparent loyalty to his mate, Fawnlock was a compete idiot. Vixene rolled her eyes and then brought out both her hands to him. " _Very well, since you're so sure,_ " she said. " _Here. Take my hands, and we'll see what happens_."

There was a slight hesitation in Fawnlock's movement, but he stepped closer and reached to grab her hands.

As Fawnlock took her hands, it occurred to Vixene that she should have mentioned the fact that he would be far more exposed as an inukom than a harina. But perhaps he wouldn't care. Oh well. She closed her eyes and adjusted her stance, standing firmly on the ground and focusing only on the task at hand.

A soft blue light began to form around them. It was as though they were in the middle of a whirlwind. Without any warning, Fawnlock felt a surge of energy rip through his body. It hit him like a bolt of lightning. There was so much pain that there was no room for thought in Fawnlock's mind.

Vixene's fur stood on end, and it took all her self-control not to open her eyes to see if this was working. Because if it wasn't, then she didn't want to see Fawnlock's burning or melting flesh; or whatever would happen if she was doing this wrong. She could feel the magic sting within her, practically burning in her veins.

To Fawnlock, it seemed like ages before the power became too much. He broke away from Vixene's grasp and fell to the forest floor. His entire body felt like it was on fire. He almost believed to be dead, had it not been for the fact that he felt the grass on his skin. It took a few moments, but slowly the burning sensation left him, and it was replaced by the feeling of a cool breeze. The forest was a lot colder than before.

When she no longer felt Fawnlock's hands in her own, Vixene toned down the magic, figuring that if she had been successful, she wouldn't need more of it. It was a slow process, but eventually she calmed down, exhaustion washing over her. She brought a hand up to her head, and squeezed her eyes further shut before slowly blinking them open. She felt a bit dizzy, but it was nothing a good rest wouldn't be able to fix. Now. What about that Fawnlock? Vixene had a look around for a moment before she looked down, and was unable to stifle the snort that escaped her when she saw the very fur-less figure in front of her. " _Well, well, well..._ "

Fawnlock propped himself up on his arms and opened his eyes. He saw the last of the markings on his arms fade out, to blend with his pale flesh. Fawnlock turned himself over and sat up to examine himself further. He touched his left arm and trailed to his shoulder, just to feel the texture of his skin. Fawnlock was finally an inukom. He looked up at Vixene and smiled. " _Thank you_."

" _It feels very weird to hear an inukom speak our language,_ " Vixene said with a small chuckle, her eyes darting downwards a bit as Fawnlock struggled to stand up again. She smirked. " _Remember, I have no idea how long it'll last, so you'd better make the most of it. Oh, and don't get too offended if your mate turns away or something when he first sees you. Inukom are very shy when it comes to... skin._ "

Fawnlock was confused as to why she would say such a thing. John was comfortable around him before, so it didn't make sense for him to be shy. Fawnlock decided that she just didn't know him like he did. But he didn't disagree with her. Instead, he stood up and bowed to her again. " _Again, I can't thank you enough. Goodbye, Vixene._ "

" _You're very welcome_ ," Vixene replied, only able to nod politely without getting too distracted. " _Now get out of here before you change back already. Show off that new skin of yours_."

It took a moment for Fawnlock to balance himself, cataloging the fact that he didn't have his alieni roh, nor his tail. But once he found his footing, he gave Vixene a smile and began to run back the way he came. Going through the forest at such a speed was a bit difficult because he no longer had the rough skin beneath his feet, nor the fur to catch any potential intrusions. But Fawnlock never slowed his pace. All he could think about was getting back to John. Though he no longer had the smell to guide him, he knew the forest well.

\--

Though the sun was still up, John knew it was getting late. Nonetheless, he strolled through his garden for probably the fifteenth time now, picking up a stray weed every now and then. It wasn't haunting him per se, but the fact that Fawnlock still hadn't returned after all this time worried him, and he wondered if he had left for good. But he wouldn't do that, would he? Except, he had been so restless lately. Maybe he had just gotten bored of this new life and wandered back into the forest. Maybe he had taken Mrs Hudson's words more personal than John had thought.

John sighed and turned towards his cottage again, meaning to go inside and wait some more. He paused, however, when he heard some rustling in the trees nearby. His mood brightened, and he glanced over at the spot where he would normally see the spirit, an apology already forming in his throat. What came out of his mouth, though, was something along the lines of: "Hey Fawn, I- AYE-AYE!!" before he almost fell over in surprise.

Fawnlock withdrew from the bushes and approached his mate. "John..." He breathed with a smile.

Of all the things in the world that could possibly have wandered in his garden, something that John never would have expected to see was a completely stark-naked man.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> Voji - Spirit.  
> Harina - Deer spirit.  
> Vouk - Wolf spirit.  
> Lisica - Fox spirit.  
> Alieni roh - The antlers on a Harina.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter! If you see any vocab you don't understand, consult the end of the chapter. Hope you guys enjoy.

John took a few steps backwards, his face burning at the sight, and his panic rising at the fact that this man knew his name. "L- look, I don't know who you are, or how you know me, or what you've been doing in there," he said, noting the various scrapes and bruises on the man's skin, "but I'll have you know this is a sacred land, alright? No- trespassers." He swallowed, forcing himself to look the man in the eyes as opposed to anywhere else. "And- for God's sake, cover yourself up, will you?"

Fawnlock jerked back a little bit at the outburst. He started to believe that perhaps this wasn't the best idea. John was clearly scared and confused by his new form. The embarrassment must have been contagious, because suddenly Fawnlock felt very shameful. Fawnlock felt a massive heat rise to his cheeks and he grabbed a stray branch from the bushes beside him to cover himself. Then he decided to speak again. "John, it's me; Fawnlock."

The panic rose as the man uttered Fawnlock's name, but John swallowed it down in favour of maybe offering some help to the obviously delusional bloke.

"Much as I don't want to, you really need some looking over," he said and cleared his throat. "And some bloody clothes. Come on, let's see if any of mine fit you. At least until you can get back to your own place."

Fawnlock frowned. While he was appreciative of John's concern and help, he obviously didn't believe him. But instead of arguing with him, he nodded. "Fine." He said.

John gestured for the man to follow him into the cottage, feeling very weird about the whole situation. “Drop the bush before you come in, would you?” He asked as he opened the door and went inside. Fawnlock did exactly as instructed while John immediately set out to get a blanket and his first aid kit. He nodded towards a chair for the man to sit down in, and then draped the blanket over his lap for the time being.

"What happened to you in there?" John asked tentatively as he opened the kit to find a couple of bandages and a few dabs.

"I was running in the forest. I wanted to find--" _you._ Fawnlock almost said. "I wanted to find this cottage."

"And you had to do that in the nude?" John asked as he tended to a cut on the man's upper arm that looked particularly nasty.

Fawnlock felt his blush returning. "I wasn't thinking rationally." He responded.

John laughed. "Obviously," he said, cleaning most of the dirt out of the biggest cuts. "Why this cottage, though? I always assumed it was kind of like a family secret. You're not a... oh, what was her maiden name again...? A Fisher, are you?"

"No," Fawnlock replied before wincing a little at John's touch. "I used to live here."

"I see..." John said plainly, moving over to clean more cuts on the man's chest area. God. He had definitely not asked for this. He then looked over the man's upper body, which was now clean for the most part. "Hang on a moment, will you? I'm going to see if I can't find something to cover you up properly. If only some pyjama bottoms." He blushed fiercely at the thought, but shook it off as he turned to get the man some clothes.

Fawnlock didn't respond at all. He simply watched John leave his side and sat in silence to reflect on his actions. Fawnlock held his hands up to look at his palms. He was starting to regret his decision. What was the point of becoming human, when John didn't even recognise him? Right then, he became more determined to prove he was John's mate. Fawnlock just didn't know how.

Quickly, John fished out some of his old clothes that were probably stretched enough to fit the man. He contemplated about lending him a pair of pants as well, but decided against it. They would probably be too snug. He collected what he could gather, which he hoped would be enough for the man to at least get out of the forest and back to his own home. John returned to where he had left the man, and handed him the clothes.

"Here, this should do for now," John told him. "You can use the bathroom to change if you want."

When John began to hand him the clothes, Fawnlock stood up and wrapped himself in the blanket so he wouldn't be exposing himself. He took the clothes from John's hands and nodded slightly. "Thank you." He responded before rising to shuffle towards the bathroom.

"No problem," John said, looking after the man despite himself. It wasn't so much the fact that he was naked that made him look, but more that he felt like he had seen this man somewhere before. Or at least someone who shared very similar traits. And walking pace. "Oh, and have a look at your feet, will you? They could be a bit damaged."

Fawnlock nodded, walking into the bathroom and closing the door behind him. He dropped the sheet from his form and looked at the opposite wall. For a moment he thought someone else was inside the room, but he blinked a few times until he realised it was his reflection. Fawnlock noticed he was incredibly pale, more so than John and Mrs Hudson. His features were pretty much the same, save for the fur-loss. And yet he couldn't help wonder why John didn't recognise him. Or at least why he demanded for him to be clothed. Did he not think he was attractive?

He looked down his chest and smoothed his hands over his abdomen, then his hips and back up again, just to get a feeling of his new body. Fawnlock was gangly compared to his other appearance. He no longer had any markings, except for a few dark spots every now and then. He didn't have any fur either, except for in more private areas, and along the bottom of his belly. He began to wonder what had attracted John to him in the first place. Was it his alieni roh? His tail? His fur patterns? Now that he had none of those things, it made Fawnlock feel disheartened.

Once he was done looking himself over, Fawnlock put on the pyjama bottoms. They came up a bit short when they were around his waist, so he lowered them to his hips. He saw a cream-colored jumper and tried to put it on, but it felt scratchy against his skin. As he took it off he stopped mid-way, catching a faint smell. It had to have been John's scent. It was different than when he had smelled it in his voji form. It was thick and smelled so distinctly like... John. It was difficult to trace so he practically smothered his entire face inside the jumper.

John wasn't entirely sure what was going on with him now. It annoyed him slightly that he wasn't able to put together why the man was so familiar. Not only that, he also felt very displeased with himself that he had allowed the guy to overtake his mind like this. As much as he wanted to deny it (and probably would if he were asked), the man was very attractive, even with is bony features and condescending, almost bored face. The truth was, though, that John wouldn't allow himself to dwell on that thought for too long, as he constantly had to remind himself that he already had a partner.

A partner who... Who actually very much resembled the man, now that John thought about it. It was as if the man had seen Fawnlock and studied him from afar, and was now trying to copy him or something, for whatever purpose. Probably to mock John. God. Would anyone ever be okay with their decision? Not that it was that much of a pressing matter, but still.

After Fawnlock had his fill he took off the jumper entirely and carried it with him as he opened the door and began to walk towards John. "This doesn't fit very well..." He told John as he held up the jumper.

John was snapped out of his thoughts by the sound of the man's voice, and he turned towards him. He felt himself blush again when he came face to face with a still half-naked man holding up his jumper towards him. "Oh, sorry," he said as he offered to take the jumper. "Could've sworn it'd be big enough. Want me to find something else?"

"Well, technically it fit, but it's far too itchy against my skin." Fawnlock replied as he handed it over. "If it isn't too much trouble, I would like a different one, yes." He requested, as he still felt very shameful of his appearance.

"Sure, okay, I'll find something else," John replied with a nod as he took the jumper, fondling the fabric a bit before smiling. "Yeah, I guess wool's not for everyone. I'll see if I have a cotton one. Or something that's not knitted. Or- maybe just a t-shirt or something." And with that, he turned to rummage through his wardrobe again, a bit embarrassed with himself.

Fawnlock watched John as he went through his clothes. Again, he found himself amazed at the extent of John's kindness. Even when the man didn't recognise him, he still treated him with respect and courtesy. "Do you believe in magic?" Fawnlock finally asked.

There was no stopping the small smile that appeared on John's face when the man said that. He picked out one of his more tugged t-shirts and handed it to the still half-naked man. "I'd be mad not to," John told him, trying not to sound as smug as he felt.

Fawnlock took the shirt from John's hand and put it on. He saw that it came up a little short, and was a little tight, but the fabric felt much better. He looked back at John, "Then why is it so hard for you to believe that I'm Fawnlock?" He asked bluntly.

John's smile faded. Again with this? "Because it's crazy, alright?" he said as calmly as he could. "Besides, how do I know you're not just some creep who's been sneaking about this place lately? And... spying on us?"

"Because you just need to trust me. I found a way to become human. It's not permanent, but it's the best I can do." Fawnlock explained, "So you just have to believe me when I say I am Fawnlock."

"I'm going to need something a lot more convincing than that," John expressed, folding his arms. "How do I know you're not completely bonkers?"

Fawnlock was growing less patient with John. And yet, he still had no idea how to convince him. Because he was becoming more frustrated, Fawnlock decided to do the only thing he knew that would clear John's mind. He reached out for John's face and placed his forehead to John's. "Because I remember the first time we met. You had me at your mercy. I was ensnared in one of your traps, helpless and fearful. I remember you telling me that you were just as scared as I was. And instead of killing me right there, you let me go. _That's_ why I came back. That's why I healed your leg. You… You showed me kindness."

At first, John was taken by such surprise by the man's sudden closeness that he almost punched him. Something made him hold back, though. Something about the man's voice, the way he spoke. Then there was the fact that even if he had been spying, he couldn't possibly have known about the trap incident, unless he was some kind of psychic.

John's mind was racing and his heart pounding, and he slowly pulled back from the man's touch to really look at him. John stared into his eyes for the longest time, entranced and intrigued. "Fawnlock...?" he then breathed slowly.

The hardness in Fawnlock's features faded away when he heard his name. He grinned and nodded. "Yes, it's me, John." He replied.

It wasn't until now, after John had looked the man over closely, taking in all the details, all his features, that he was able to see who this was. He couldn't resist bringing a hand to Fawnlock's face, finding it extremely weird when he felt bare skin under it as opposed to fur. John huffed a small laugh, an amazed grin spreading across his face.

"Wha- what- How even- What?" he stammered.

"It's a long story," Fawnlock admitted as he reveled in the feeling of John touching him. "I'll explain later, I promise. I just want to have this, for as long as I can." He told him as he rubbed his thumb along John's cheek.

"But- but how?" John continued, still completely baffled. He put both hands on Fawnlock's neck, and then his shoulders, upper arms, chest; anywhere he could reach for the moment. His mind wouldn't let him grasp the reality of the sight before him. "Why?"

Fawnlock momentarily closed his eyes, loving the sensation of John running his hands along his new form. They snapped back open, however, when John asked his last question. He looked at John with an almost guilty expression. "I know that you told me you loved me for our differences... but I couldn't get the expression Mrs Hudson wore out of my head. I just wanted things to be easier. And the only way I saw that was to change myself." He explained.

Fawnlock's expression somehow managed to mirror itself in John's being, as he now felt guilty about having brought Mrs Hudson's attention to this whole thing in the first place. He supposed Fawnlock would tell him the how later, but for now his main focus was on the why. John ran his hands down Fawnlock's arms and then laced their fingers together. "So... you changed yourself, because someone else was being a twat," he stated plainly.

"Not just that. Every day I went on thinking about you growing older, while I remain young. I... I thought that if I changed, you wouldn't... I wouldn't have to watch you die." Fawnlock admitted.

John developed a very pained expression. He had thought of that too, surely, but he hadn't expected Fawnlock to be this affected by it. And now that he knew that, he wasn't sure what to do. So he did the first thing that came to his mind, and brought Fawnlock into a reassuring embrace.

"It scares me too, you know," John admitted as he caressed Fawnlock's back. "And you said it's not permanent. So what if when time's up, you won't change back? What if instead of turning back to your old self, you'll just... drop? You said it was very powerful magic."

Fawnlock wrapped his arms around John as well. "That won't happen.” He told John before placing a kiss on the side of John's head.

"You can't be so sure of that," John insisted, burying his face in the crook of Fawnlock's neck.

"Enough." Fawnlock said in a demanding tone, and his face had hardened. "We're here now, and that's all that matters. Alright?"

After a few seconds, John gave in with a sigh. "Yes, you're right, sorry," he said instinctively. "Let's- not think about that. For a while." He ran his hands slowly up and down Fawnlock's sides, still finding it weird how he was doing this to an actual human being and not a spirit. "What about that 'long story' of yours, then?"

"I met with a lisica, a fox spirit, when I was in the woods. She had the power to change me, so she did." Fawnlock explained, continuing to adore the feeling of being touched by John in such a way.

"She just... changed you?" John questioned. "With no catch or fine print or anything? Don't you think that's a little too convenient?"

"John, I was prince of the harina. I explained my plight and she was sympathetic. She told me I owe her a favour, but I doubt it's on the forefront of her mind." Fawnlock explained. He leaned in closer to John and kissed him on the lips. "As neither is this discussion on the forefront of mine." Fawnlock told him as he pulled away slightly.

John would have gasped at the kiss if he hadn't seen it coming. How could something so familiar still feel so new? After Fawnlock spoke, John chuckled and put his hand to the back of the other man's neck and just looked at him. "You are the biggest idiot I have ever met in my life. Did you know that?" he said with a cheeky smile.

Despite the insult, Fawnlock smiled back. "I didn't. But even if that means for me to go to Yamahvan and back for you, I'll take the title." He said before kissing John again.

Now this was something John didn't think he'd experience again; kissing a man. He didn't even know why he was so hung up on it. It was still Fawnlock, after all. Just... sans fur. And everything else that made him animal-like. So instead of thinking about it too much, John gave into the sensation and did what he always did. He wrapped his arms around Fawnlock, closed his eyes, and carefully kissed him back.

The moment they were kissing was even better than Fawnlock had ever imagined. Granted, it was no different then before, but it still felt amazing. Fawnlock traced one of his hands from John's face into his hair, loving the feeling of it running across his bare skin. As always, John was being gentle and loving with his kisses. And Fawnlock made sure to do the same.

John wanted to ask how long Fawnlock thought this would last, just in case the transformation back would be more drastic than he expected. But despite all his worries, he couldn't bring himself to break away from the kiss. Not yet. At least not until he got to reciprocate by running his fingers through Fawnlock's hair and massaging his scalp like he so often did. Just to test the reaction.

The familiar sensation caused Fawnlock's mind to quiet completely. He was torn between leaning into John's kiss, and leaning into his touch. It was no surprise to Fawnlock when he decided to continue kissing John. What he did instead was let out a soft and pleasant sound, to let John know he appreciated it.

Oh. This was new. Fawnlock never really let out any sounds when they kissed, or even when he was petted, save for a few low rumbles that John had dubbed his purrs. But this was very different. And very pleasant, actually. John lightly traced his fingers down the back of Fawnlock's head and to his neck, where he brushed his fingertips against the skin.

God it was strange to just feel bare skin. As he did this, something about the way Fawnlock was moving his own hands in his hair changed, and John couldn't help the small, surprised whimper that escaped him.

That had never happened before. But Fawnlock decided he loved bringing out different sounds from John. It only made things more exciting and intriguing. Fawnlock trailed his hands to John's jaw, where he brought it down to John's chest. Just the feeling of clothes against his skin was new to him. And he loved it.

John's heart was working on hyper drive now, the new touches and sounds making him far more excited than he should be. He brought his own hands down to the small of Fawnlock's back and then tugged him closer, pressing their bodies firmly together. He vaguely heard something in the back of his head reminding him that he would never do this if Fawnlock was still harina, but he wasn't listening. Instead, he let out another sound as he felt Fawnlock's hands on his chest, knowing that he would be able to feel his rapid heartbeat.

When John pulled him closer and made those sounds, he felt as though his insides were curling and became eager for more. The push and pull of their kissing steadily became faster, as though they were starved. He felt John's heart pounding in his chest, which only served as an example for his as it sped up as well.

John soon wanted more contact, so he used his hands to remove Fawnlock's from his chest and put them on his sides before pressing against him again, this time making sure that they didn't miss one inch. "This- this feels- so weird," he managed to breathe between his erratic kisses.

Fawnlock took in deep breaths, just to feel their chests move against one another. When he heard John speak he pulled away from John's lips in order to kiss his neck and jaw. "How so? This- this body was made, for you." He breathed.

"I know. God, I know," John sighed, clutching at the fabric of Fawnlock's shirt and tilting his head back to expose more of his neck. "But it- it's not... It's not really the same."

Instantly, Fawnlock stilled in his actions. He straightened up in John's grasp, but couldn't look at him for very long. "Is it because I'm... unattractive to you?" He asked.

"What? No!" John replied instantly, already feeling guilty for what he had said. "Fawnlock, you're still bloody gorgeous; only a complete moron would think otherwise. It's just... when you're like this, I feel like I'm cheating."

Though he could still feel the blush from John's compliment, Fawnlock frowned a little. "It's still me, you know. Just without the markings. Don't you understand how much I've wanted this? Even just being able to talk to you without being misunderstood. I... I need this."

John took a deep breath, and then cupped Fawnlock's neck. "We agreed, Fawnlock," he stated. "No bonding. And all this? This is pretty much what happens before that. All the snogging and the, uh... the moaning..." He blushed a bit at that, but willed himself to continue. "Look, what I'm trying to say is, I don't want to do something with the human you that I wouldn't do with harina you. That's what I mean when I say it would be cheating. I'd be taking complete advantage of the situation, something I'd never do if you were still in spirit form." He paused for a second, hoping desperately that he wasn't ruining everything by talking about this. "Do you understand me?"

Fawnlock felt as though he had been struck across the face. The word 'never' echoed through his mind. He backed away a little from John, but the temptation was still there. "I'm sorry. I do. It's just... difficult when my instincts tell me to claim you before anyone else does." He told him as he placed his hands gently on either side of John's face. "It's like... a hunger."

As Fawnlock spoke, John couldn't help but chuckle softly. It was very strange to hear a human being talk about instincts and claiming - especially when said human being was basically talking about sex. "I know, and I get that. Completely," John told him as he gently rubbed the back of Fawnlock's neck with his fingers. "But there has to be some other way, right? For you to, uh... claim me?"

There was a slight pause as Fawnlock contemplated John's question. "Perhaps... Though I'm not entirely sure. I... I really have no experience in such areas..." He mumbled with a large blush spread across his face. "After all, you are my one and only mate."

It was as if Fawnlock's embarrassment was contagious, as John could feel his cheeks start to heat up. "Oh, yeah, right," he said awkwardly, and then swallowed. "Do you... know anything about it? At all?"

"Not particularly. Only what I've been told... and what I feel." Fawnlock admitted as he ran his thumb slightly on the edge of John's mouth.

John took in a sharp breath at the touch, hating the fact that his body seemed to be betraying their promise. "And- and so you'd know that, it works... It'd be very different with us, than, say, you and Doelly."

"Yes, of course." Fawnlock said with a slight nod. "But you're right, we had already made a decision. We've denied tradition, and we can deny nature." He said reassuringly.

"Well, you've certainly denied it," John replied, looking Fawnlock over, a grin tugging at his lips.

Fawnlock couldn't help but grin back. "Yes..." He agreed just before planting a kiss on John's lips.

John kissed back chastely and then drew back a bit. "Don't you feel a bit chilly without any fur?" he asked right as the thought entered his mind. The wondered whether he should add the fact that Fawnlock also only had a t-shirt and stretched-out pyjama bottoms - and no pants - but that was obvious. And slightly awkward to mention.

"Not when I'm close to you..." Fawnlock told him with a smile.

"Oh come off it," John said playfully, his grin only widening. "But there's got to be a difference on your head since you don't have your antlers anymore." Pause. "Which will also put the headboard of my bed in less of a danger of being scratched to death. That's a plus."

Fawnlock grinned a bit. "Well yes, it was strange without them at first. But I was able to keep my balance. After all, I managed to run through the forest."

"Naked," John pointed out smugly. "Stark-bloody-naked, and you ran straight up to me and expected me not to get a bit shocked?"

The blush returned on Fawnlock's face. "Well you were just fine about my nakedness beforehand. I didn't think you'd even blink. Then again, I didn't have an idea of how much I had changed." He explained.

John chuckled. "Yeah, well, extreme exposure like that will do that to me," he replied, and then poked Fawnlock's cheek. "And will you stop blushing already? You're making it very difficult for me to keep a straight face here."

"So sorry, allow me to contain my embarrassment for your sake." Fawnlock said in a playful tone. "Still... I'm really glad for this form. If only for the fact that we can understand each other."

"Yes, I was going to mention that," John said, his grin softening slightly. "Feels weird not hearing you speak in broken English anymore." _Even if it is the most adorable thing I'll ever hear_ , he didn't say.

Fawnlock smiled. "To be honest, it feels odd to me as well. Everything makes more sense. I'm not sure if I'll retain much of it, though." He admitted.

With a small shake of his head, John responded: "It doesn't matter. We'll just make the most of it while it lasts, and when it wears off, we'll keep on living just as we have been doing." He shrugged. "It's as simple as that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Voji - Spirit.  
> Harina - Deer spirit.  
> Lisica - Fox spirit.  
> Alieni roh - The antlers on a Harina. They determine age and experience.
> 
> Zerukom - Death, the great beyond for the souls of spirits and beings alike.  
> Samahattara realm - The higher seeing world, as viewed by glorious and powerful gods.  
> Voji realm - The seeing/living world as viewed by the forest spirits.  
> Inukom realm - The seeing/living world as viewed by humans and lesser beings.  
> Yamahvan - Death. The underworld for demons, cursed spirits and evil beings.


	14. Chapter 14

The transformation lasted longer than Fawnlock had expected. Vixene had said she had lasted a few days, so he really only expected it to last a few hours. And yet when he awoke the next morning, Fawnlock was still furless. And it wasn't until he was going through his day, that Fawnlock noticed how reliant he was on various things that made him voji. Things like his overall strength, his senses, and mostly his magic.

Now that he was inukom, his endurance wasn't the best, his senses were dull, and he had no magical abilities. Even though he had experienced it after being cast out of his realm, it was dreadful for him to experience it for even longer. Fawnlock felt as though someone had cut off one of his limbs. Because of this, he soon found himself feeling useless; which only caused him to find his way back to the couch to sulk.

To be honest, it was simply out of habit that John had gotten out of bed without thinking and gone straight to his garden. He was very aware of Fawnlock next to him, but the fact that he was human didn't faze him in the slightest. It was almost as if it had always been this way, which must have been why it was so easy for John to start working without thinking much about it.

So Fawnlock was human now. What of it? It wouldn't last forever, but the fact that he had pulled it off without killing himself was admirable. As was everything that mad spirit did. John laughed to himself at the thought as he continued working. It really shouldn't have surprised him that Fawnlock would just up and do whatever he pleased just because he really wanted it. For such a magical creature, he really was a stubborn git sometimes.

It seemed as though nothing had even changed. John was busy in the garden, and he was lying there brooding on the couch. Fawnlock wasn't sure how long it had passed, but he finally pulled himself off. He enjoyed watching John work, so he walked to the doorway to stand in it. Fawnlock saw John pulling at a few weeds, until their eyes met. Fawnlock expected John to give him a small glance and return to work, but he stopped altogether.

"Hey," John greeted, and then waited for Fawnlock to do or say something. When he didn't, John continued: "Have you come to help me out?"

Fawnlock blinked a few times before he spoke. "I came to watch you." He said simply.

John raised an eyebrow. "You do realise what you are now, don't you?" he said, gesturing to himself before pointing at Fawnlock. "When you're harina, you can charm the soil all you want and help the plants grow, and then watch me do all the work. Now that you're just like me, we can both take care of this place. Plus, I could use some extra hands," he added with a smile.

When Fawnlock heard John's explanation, he felt he had to agree. "Right, of course." He said with a sure nod. So Fawnlock proceeded into the garden, and tried his best at tending to the garden.

"And you know where the main tools are," John said, trying to contain the grin that was threatening to spread across his face. There was something about Fawnlock actually doing some labour work that made him feel stupidly pleased with himself.

Fawnlock saw John’s smug look and shot him a small narrowed glance before picking up a trowel to handle digging up the weeds.

John pursed his lips to keep himself from snorting and looked away for a second before he spoke again. "So when you're done with that, you think you could maybe rake the soil? It's pretty trampled," he said, nodding over to the vast amount of space the garden took.

This time Fawnlock frowned and tossed the trowel over his shoulder. He then picked up a metal rake and stomped off clear to the other side of the garden. Immediately Fawnlock placed the rake into the ground and began to pull back the soil.

The initial amusement gradually wore off once Fawnlock stood up and started working. John finished clearing the weeds for the most part, and then stood up to pick up a hoe to catch the roots of the ones he may have missed. Most of the plants were already covered, but he figured he might as well prepare the soil for some more possible cultivation.

It took a great deal longer than Fawnlock had expected. In the process he began to feel the heat bear down on his back. Slowly, he felt a layer of sweat forming across his entire body. Fawnlock pulled off the shirt he was wearing mid-way, feeling as though it was adding to his struggles. It was damp, which made Fawnlock feel sickened.

John looked up from what he was doing when he heard an irritated sound come from Fawnlock's direction. He was hit with a wave of heat that he was very certain had nothing to do with the sunlight. Why, oh, why couldn't Fawnlock have kept his non-sweating features? John swallowed, and forced himself to focus on the task at hand, so he looked back down to the soil. His face still felt very warm, though.

"Feeling a bit hot?" he asked sheepishly.

"Obviously." Fawnlock told John as he worked the ground. He gave John a slight glance and saw his flushed face. "You seem hot as well. You should probably take a break."

Crap. "And leave all this work behind? Nah, I think I'll finish hoeing and then maybe cool off for a bit," John replied, and then had a better look at Fawnlock's face. He seemed to be utterly disgusted with himself, or maybe just his shirt. John grinned. "I told you sweating was a bit iffy."

Fawnlock merely frowned a little to himself and continued to work. "It definitely smelled better when I was harina..."

"And need I remind you that you tasted it too?" John had to point out, if only just to distract himself from all the hard work.

This time Fawnlock shot John a look. "I couldn't help it. To a harina, smell is everything; you know that."

"I know, I know," John admitted, chuckling a bit. "I'm just saying; I did tell you. And now you should know why I got hesitant when you did it, right?"

Fawnlock caught the strongest scent of his own body odor when he lifted his arms to drive the rake into the ground. His face scrunched in an unpleasant way and he groaned a little. "Ugh. Yes." He replied.

John smiled. "You'll get used to it. And there's not really that much left to do now that there are two of us, so you can get yourself cleaned up soon," he told Fawnlock simply.

"Good." Fawnlock said. "I don't know how you can stand to do all this work."

"Comes with being me, I guess," John said with a shrug. "And getting to stay at the cottage, of course. That, and--" He licked his lips awkwardly, "Yeah, I like to think I'm pretty physically fit. So... it's all good."

When John had paused, Fawnlock had stopped in his work to look up. A small smile appeared on his lips as he gave John a glance over. "Well, thinking on it, it does suit you... And you rather are... fit for the task."

John felt himself blush again and sheepishly ran a hand through his hair. "Um... thank you, I guess," he replied, duly noting that he had never heard Fawnlock compliment him like this. At least not about his appearance.

Fawnlock just smiled at John before turning back to work. It gave him a satisfactory kind of feeling when he caused John to become slightly flustered. He reminded himself to do it more often.

John almost wanted to say something back, something that would make Fawnlock react similarly, but ended up not being able to think of anything. So he kept working the ground, irritating the few roots that were left of the weeds, and most of the ones that were already around the vegetables. Although the garden was relatively large, with two people going about, the task took less time than usual, for which John was extremely thankful.

As he finished, John lifted the hem of his shirt up to his face to wipe it. He stuck the hoe into the ground, stretched, and then sighed. "I think that's that for now," he told Fawnlock.

Upon hearing that, Fawnlock dropped the rake and stretched a little. "Ugh. Finally." He groaned.

John laughed, running his arm over his forehead. "Aw, come on. It wasn't that bad, was it?"

"Are you kidding?" Fawnlock asked. "I feel awful, I smell terrible and I'm beyond thirsty."

"Well," John began, and expanded his arms to gesture to himself, "welcome to being human. The most disgusting, smelly creatures on the planet." He let his arms drop and then turned towards the cottage, picking up the hoe and trowel on the way.

Fawnlock looked after John before picking up the rake and following behind him. "I beg to differ. You've obviously have never met a tvor spirit on a bad day." Even though he couldn't see much of John's face, he could see the question forming in his mind. "A skunk spirit. Besides, saying that suggests that I have poor taste in mates."

"That's not what I'm saying and you know it," John said, mildly amused, as they approached the small tool shed beside the cottage. He threw the hoe and trowel in without thinking much of it, and then took Fawnlock's rake to do the same thing. "But I will say this: you definitely didn't choose the foulest-smelling one. So good on you for that."

A grin formed on Fawnlock's face when he heard that. He leaned in close with a light chuckle. "Yes, good for me." He said before leaning into John's space, intending to capture a kiss.

John, on the other hand, drew back the more Fawnlock leaned in. "Um... not that I wouldn't love to snog you senseless right now, but we're both kind of..." He scrunched his face, and then stuck out his tongue. "Yeah, not good."

Fawnlock gave John a small frown before pulling away. "Fine..." He said before turning and making his way into the cottage.

The look on Fawnlock's face made John giggle a bit, and he followed him inside. "Come on, don't be like that, you know what I mean," he told Fawnlock as he toed off his muddy shoes. "Once we're both clean, we can get right back on that, okay?" He walked up to Fawnlock and pinched his side. "No more sulking for today."

As soon as John touched him Fawnlock flinched away and flashed him a smile. "Alright, alright!" He laughed.

"Oh, I am so remembering that," John said before poking the spot he had pinched. "Note to self: Fawnlock is ticklish!" he said as he poked again.

Fawnlock tried pulling himself away from John's touch, and playfully hit John's hand away. "S- stop it!" He exclaimed.

"Not on your life!" John said back as he positioned himself behind Fawnlock o be able to reach both his sides. He rapidly tapped his fingers up and down the bare skin, loving the way Fawnlock twitched and squirmed as he tried to get away from him.

All Fawnlock could do was laugh until his sides began to hurt. Never before had he laughed so hard; he almost couldn't breathe. It was a strange feeling, as well as a bizarre sound to him. "J- John!!" He exclaimed before falling into another fit of laughter.

Even though he was the one doing the tickling, John was laughing just as much as Fawnlock was. The fact that the guy was guffawing like a maniac was simply hilarious; not to mention something that John had never heard before, and he was certainly going to make the most of it. "Yeees?" he drawled between laughs, never letting up the tickling.

Fawnlock found himself enjoying being tickled, and simply couldn't stop laughing.

"Do- do you surre- hender?" John said through his laughs, finding Fawnlock's to be extremely contagious. He drew closer to Fawnlock, despite the smell, and trailed his hands from his sides and forward to the bottom of his belly. He knew for a fact that if people were ticklish, this was also a particularly sensitive area.

The moment John touched his belly, Fawnlock turned away from John, wrapping his arms around his stomach protect it. The damage was done, however, as he continued to laugh. "Y- Yes!!" He exclaimed.

One last move, John thought as he lightly pinched Fawnlock's belly before wrapping his arms thoroughly around him. He continued laughing as he did so, pressing his face against Fawnock's back and using him to keep his balance.

When John had his arms wrapped around him, Fawnlock could feel John's breath against his skin. He laughed a bit as well, despite himself. Fawnlock brought his hands to John's arms and grabbed a hold of them. He had no idea what else to do with his arms, and it felt like the best thing to do. Once the laughter cleared from their throats, there was a moment of silence between them.

"I like this form..." Fawnlock admitted, "It makes me feel closer to you, somehow."

After catching his breath, John reflected on that for a moment. As much as he hated to admit it, Fawnlock was right. Even if they had been very close before, they had never done anything like this without either of them (but probably only John) feeling either awkward about it or hesitant about it.

John embraced Fawnlock tighter, closed his eyes and sighed. "I think I know why that is," he said softly as he rocked Fawnlock gently side to side. "I think... I think when you're harina, I'm more afraid of offending you somehow. Or doing something you won't like because it's against what you're used to or something like that."

Once John explained himself, it made some sense. The harina culture was built upon high standards and various rules. But they were rules that Fawnlock had broken intentionally.

"You shouldn't have to worry about that. Our cultures might be different, but I have abandoned mine. I am no longer royalty; so you shouldn't hold yourself back for me."

Even though he would probably regret it once the moment was over, John lightly kissed Fawnlock's back, and then simply rested his forehead against it. "You're right, I'm sorry," he replied. "But I promise. Nothing is going to change once you turn back, okay? We can still be this close. It's not just because you're human, you know..."

A light blush trailed Fawnlock's cheeks when John had kissed his bare skin. It felt pleasant and reassuring. "Alright..." Fawnlock said with a slight nod.

"Good," John said with a smile. He then smacked his lips and chuckled before slowly letting go of Fawnlock. "But I think we were on our way somewhere. To get cleaned up after all that garden work."

"Mm. Yes." Fawnlock agreed. Normally, when Fawnlock was unclean he would head towards the nearest body of water outside in the forest. So by pure habit Fawnlock drew away from John and began to head out the door.

John laughed. "No, you idiot," he told Fawnlock as he grabbed his hand to stop him from getting any further. "Even if it's just this one time, you're getting yourself clean in a very, weirdly human way."

Fawnlock looked at John with a curious expression, but didn't argue. "Well... Alright."

Only then did John put together the crucial facts. First off, Fawnlock had never used a shower, and thus had to be taught. Second, Fawnlock, for the most part, learned by doing, so he would start right away. Which led to the third fact: they would have to do it together. Oh crap. Well, surely Fawnlock had come to the same conclusion. No use pointing out the obvious. Right?

John was incredibly silent for the short minute it took for him to lead Fawnlock to the bathroom. Fawnlock had been inside a few times, but he never did much once he was there. It wasn't that John wouldn't allow it, but it was the simple fact that Fawnlock never wanted to. He had the outdoors to rely on cleaning himself. Once they were both inside, Fawnlock watched John with every intension to learn.

John tentatively shuffled on his feet, and licked his lips in a nervous manner. "So... You know the basics, yes?" he said, looking everywhere but directly at Fawnlock. "Water, and rinse. Just add some soap and you'll be... good, I guess."

Fawnlock looked at John with a raised brow. "The soap is a new concept, but I get the idea. I'm not completely clueless, John. I just don't know how to… release the water." Was the only way he could choose to describe it.

Because he was so wrapped up in thoughts of the inevitable nudity, John had barely heard what Fawnlock was saying. He quickly snapped back and pointed towards the shower. "You just turn the handle there, and move it up or down to adjust the heat. Pretty simple." He took a deep breath as he stepped backwards. "So. Should I just... leave you to it, then?"

Once it was explained to him, Fawnlock nodded. Then his head followed John, momentarily confused. "I had the impression we would bathe together. In harina culture, it's not that uncommon for us to bathe in groups, or just with our mates." He explained, before he thought back on John's initial reaction to his naked form, "Unless it would make you feel uncomfortable...?"

"It's not that - not exactly," John admitted and sheepishly rubbed the back of his head. "It's more that... you know, you've never seen me naked and all. And with our pact, it'd be... Look, I don't even know. Would it be weird?"

"No. Not to me, at least." Fawnlock told him. "And how would this be breaking our pact, exactly?"

John flushed. "I don't knooow," he drawled in exasperation. "Naked bodies generally do lead to that. Especially if touching a lot. With- water. And soap." And now he was picturing it. Great. "Also, you'll probably freak out when you see me without any clothes on."

"Why would I do that?" Fawnlock asked. "Do you doubt my self-control? If that's the case, then feel free to leave me to my own devices." He said with a small frown. Then he immediately turned away from John and began to reach for the handle.

"That's not- I'm not saying that," John tried as he felt a small sting of guilt when Fawnlock turned from him. "I know you can control yourself; that's not what I mean at all. I just mean... Well..." He sighed, finally willing himself to admit his silliest worry. "You might not like what you see. Of me. As a whole."

Fawnlock froze before facing John completely. It wasn't until now that Fawnlock realised that John had the same amount of insecurity as he did. He placed a gentle hand on John's shoulder and looked into his eyes. "John. I love you. And when I say that, I mean every single part of you. You are incredibly handsome. And I'm not just saying that."

As if the gentle touch wasn't enough, Fawnlock's words made John blush slightly. He knew for a fact that he was telling the truth, and that it shouldn't have come as a surprise to him, but he still felt incredibly awkward. "Well... If you- say so," he said with a shrug, and then proceeded to undo his trousers. Of course he knew Fawnlock had seen his bare torso before, that wasn't really that much of a problem. The problem was the whole picture. "You brought this on yourself," he added.

Fawnlock smiled with the corner of his mouth, pleased to have gotten his point somewhat across. He reached for his own (borrowed) trousers and let them fall to his ankles. Fawnlock watched John as he stripped himself bare. The anatomy wasn't unfamiliar to him at all. The only thing different to his eye was the fine blonde hair that continued past John's waist and was speckled along his legs. Fawnlock's eyes didn't linger, however, as he lifted them to look at John. He smiled, leaned forward and planted a small kiss on John's forehead. "Like I said; handsome." Fawnlock told him before pulling away.

Now completely nude, John had expected Fawnlock to give him an odd glance or some kind of a disapproving look. When all he got was a compliment and a kiss, he felt incredibly stupid. For the moment, he refrained from looking Fawnlock over completely and simply took his hands in his own, and smiled. "I'm being an idiot again, aren't I?" he asked, feeling his initial worries fade slightly.

"Yes," Fawnlock told him, "but I realise where those feelings come from." He admitted only because he had felt them as well the first time he had presented his human form to John.

John nodded, and then chuckled a bit. "So I take it we're doing this together, then?"

"Of course," Fawnlock responded. He turned to the shower and leaned down a bit to observe the handle. Fawnlock lingered as he recalled what John had told him about the device.

Under any other circumstances, John would have just looked on and waited for Fawnlock to set a right heat, or to call him over or something. What he did, though, was finding himself staring far too much for his own good. While this was Fawnlock, and so John knew what he looked like for the most part when covered with fur, this was very, very different. He was so inexplicably nude that John couldn't help it. So now he did look Fawnlock over, at least the backside, and flushed at the sight. Damn.

Once the shower released its water, Fawnlock placed his hand underneath it before immediately pulling it back. It wasn't so much as the temperature as it was the feeling of the water hitting his bare skin. It felt strange to him, but after placing his arm under it, he became used to it. After the water had been adjusted to his liking, Fawnlock stood and walked into the shower. The water streaming was as cold as the rivers that flowed through the forest. A small time had passed before Fawnlock gestured for John to be by his side.

John snapped out of his gaze and swallowed, already feeling like this was a bad idea again. Now not so much because of his own body, but because of Fawnlock's. Why did he have to be human? Just why? John took slow steps towards the shower, and stepped inside, quickly pulling back because of the cold. "Gah! Are you serious?" he exclaimed in surprise, having not expected this.

Fawnlock blinked at John, confused. "I thought this temperature was appropriate, seeing as we've been out in the heat." He explained.

"It makes sense that way, yes, but ironically, we need more heat in order to get clean," John told Fawnlock as he reached over to adjust the temperature more to his own liking. "Relieves the skin more, and does better cleansing than ice cold water does."

"Oh, I see--!" Fawnlock gave a slight yelp as soon as he felt the water change drastically from cold to hot on his skin. It felt like hot, tiny stones were pelting him. As much as he didn't like it, Fawnlock stood in the middle of it, and he began to adjust to the temperature.

John noticed the way Fawnlock tensed as he changed the setting, and so drew it back a bit. "Too hot, maybe?" he said, looking concernedly at Fawnlock.

"A- a little." Fawnlock admitted.

"Here, I'll fix it a bit..." John said as he reached for the handle again, now making sure to get a temperature they could both handle. As he moved, he brushed against Fawnlock's bare, wet skin, which made him shiver. God. This wasn't going to end well, was it?

When the water reached an appropriate temperature, Fawnlock felt more relaxed. "That's good." He told John.

"Alright then," John said as he reached over once more, now picking up the necessities. "Here's a washcloth and some soap. Shampoo's on the shelf in the corner there," he pointed towards said corner, "and uh... yeah."

Fawnlock frowned a little. "It seems a bit excessive to have all these items to clean one's body." He commented.

"Yeah, well its not just about removing dirt from your fur, now is it?" John responded as he handed Fawnlock the washcloth. "Everything sticks to skin, and you have to work on the tough spots to get them out." He gestured to Fawnlock's hair. "And that, my friend, is a whole category in and of itself."

"Hm," was all Fawnlock chose to say as he took the washcloth into his hand. He began to cleanse himself with the washcloth and soap, starting with his arms. Fawnlock seemed to be managing things until he tried reaching his back.

John was busy with his own cleaning, and didn't notice anything was wrong until he saw Fawnlock having trouble reaching. He looked up to see Fawnlock stretching all over the place, unintentionally exposing himself far more than John had seen. Finally, as much as John wanted to gawk, he cleared his throat, and held up his own cloth. "Need some help there?"

Fawnlock stopped squirming around and looked at John. "Erm, yes, please." He said.

"Okay, turn around," John told him, and when Fawnlock did, John had to huff a bit in order to keep calm. Whoever gave Fawnlock the right to be this attractive in any shape or form should be hanged. Or commended. John wasn't sure which. Either way, he went about washing Fawnlock's back as thoroughly as he could, but with soft movements.

The moment John moved along his skin, Fawnlock closed his eyes and took in a steady breath. It felt very soothing to feel the repetitive motions of John's cloth along his back. He began to wonder why they hadn't done this more often.

John continued cleaning, making sure to get every spot and to get Fawnlock as clean as possible. And although it was an easy enough task to focus on as such, John couldn't get his mind off Fawnlock's muscles and the way his human form's skin made the most beautiful contrast to his dark hair and just how much he felt like he had a sudden craving for something. "You good?" he willed himself to ask eventually.

"Mm? Ah, yes. Thank you." Fawnlock told him as he broke out of his stupor. He turned towards John and held up his own washcloth. "Shall I do the same?" Fawnlock asked.

"Be my guest," John said as he turned from Fawnlock to get his own back washed. God. This was simultaneously the most endearing and the most frustrating thing he had been through with Fawnlock. John refrained from tensing up too much, but couldn't help but rub his arm awkwardly, if only because the situation called for it.

Fawnlock tried his best to repeat the same motions John had done on his back. After a moment, Fawnlock found himself not only looking over the moving muscles in John's back, but also feeling them. Granted, the washcloth separated his hand, but he could still feel every curve and crease. It was when Fawnlock reached John's lower back that he realised how his movements had slowed, until he stopped completely and pulled away. "There." He decided to say before turning away to hide a small blush on his face.

John nodded, even though he wasn't facing Fawnlock, and then turned towards him. "Right. Ta," was all he said for the time being. If the awkwardness levels wouldn't drop soon, John was certain he was going to burst. He continued washing himself, far more than usual, and tried to clear his mind. But all he could think about was another aspect that hadn't been discussed. "Uh, also, I don't know how it is with spirits, but with humans, you really need to take care of your... crotch area. Clean it well, that is."

An even larger blush bloomed on Fawnlock's face. "R- right. Of course. I was just about to." He said quickly.

"Good, good. Under and behind too," John commented.

"I understand, John." Fawnlock bit out as he turned away and followed John's instruction.

Just because he knew he would just be ignored if he spoke again. So he decided to take his own advice just to keep himself occupied for the moment.

As soon as he was done, Fawnlock eyed the shampoo. He placed the soap down and picked up the bottle. He turned it over in his hand, but nothing came out of it. Fawnlock noticed a cap on it, and began to unscrew it completely.

John finished with one last swipe up his torso, and then ran his free hand through his hair, wanting to wash that as well. Against his better judgment, he turned towards Fawnlock, just to see how things were going. When he saw Fawnlock messing with the bottle, John giggled and placed his hand on top of Fawnlock's. "No no, you don't have to take the entire thing off," he said, and pointed to the flip on top. "There. Use that one."

"Ah." Fawnlock took another look at the bottle and squeezed some of the liquid into the palm of his hand. After he had gotten a fair amount into his hand, he placed it on top of his head. Unsure of what else to do, he kept piling more of the substance into his dark curls.

This time, John laughed. "I'd tell you that you can never use too much of this stuff..." he began as he stopped Fawnlock from flooding his hair with shampoo, "but you can always overdo it." Before he knew it, John was struggling with the shampoo now leaking from Fawnlock's hair, and he tried to shove it back up. Which of course resulted in him technically showing Fawnlock how to go about washing his hair. "Uh... So this is how that works, anyway..."

The moment John had his hands in Fawnlock's hair he melted against the touch. He leaned his head back towards John to give him more access to his scalp. "Mm, that feels nice." He told John.

Surprised, John continued what he was doing, if only because Fawnlock seemed to like it. "I take I'm going to have to do this for you too?" he asked in a somewhat teasing manner.

"If only for a little while." Fawnlock said with a smile. At the moment, there was no greater feeling than John's fingers running through his wet hair. Though he had lost his ability to purr, he gave a small 'hmm' in pleasure.

John felt a small shiver go down his spine, and cursed under his breath. What he wouldn't give for Fawnlock to just turn back to harina form and stop with this human nonsense. Or stop being so bloody attractive. He continued washing Fawnlock's hair as promised, finding himself almost lost in what he was doing.

After a few minutes, Fawnlock noticed that the shampoo from his head was almost entirely rinsed, but John still had his hands in his hair. Though Fawnlock appreciated his mate's soothing motions, he didn't want to keep John distracted. "I think that's enough, John. Thank you."

The words snapped John out of his apparent trance, and he gradually stopped. "God..." he breathed before removing his hands from Fawnlock's hair, as much as he wanted to keep going. "Right, yeah, sorry. Maybe you could run a hand through it, just to see if I missed anything?"

Fawnlock did exactly as John told him, and pulled his hands through his hair. "You did fine." He told John as he gave him a smile.

"Alright," John said, trying not to look as awkward as he felt, and then gestured to the shampoo before pointing at his own hair. "Guess I gotta take care of this too. Won't clean itself."

"I could... at least, I think I could do it if you'd like me to." Fawnlock blurted. Because he had enjoyed the feeling so much, Fawnlock thought it would be good to reciprocate.

Despie himself, John grinned, and then shrugged. "You know what? I think I would," he said as he turned away from Fawnlock once more. "Always nice to feel someone run their fingers through your hair. Even if it's short."

Fawnlock smiled upon hearing that. Then he took the shampoo bottle into his hand and poured the liquid into the opposite hand. Fawnlock put the bottle down and gently smeared the liquid through John's hair.

Although the first touch was a bit cold, John quickly melted into it as Fawnlock started moving his hands. John closed his eyes and leaned his head back a bit, trying to get as relaxed as he could. He wondered momentarily if Fawnlock was going through the same thought process he had, but figured he probably wouldn't.

As Fawnlock scrubbed John's hair, he noticed a foam beginning to form. It intrigued him, but he didn't draw attention to it. Instead, he continued to rub it through and out of John's fine hair. Fawnlock could tell that John was enjoying this as much as he had only minutes before.

John hummed deeply as Fawnlock continued washing him, feeling extremely contented and relaxed. "You sure you've never done this before?" he asked. "Because you're a natural."

Fawnlock chuckled slightly. "Well I learned from the best." He told John as he wiped away the last of the shampoo out of John's hair.

"Then you're absolutely a prized student, because you only got one lesson," John said just before running a hand through his hair and ruffling it a bit.

"Thank you, teacher." Fawnlock said with a grin. As soon as John's hand was out of his hair, Fawnlock leaned down and planted a small kiss on the crown of his head.

"Any time," John said, amused, and patted Fawnlock's shoulder. "Now. Feeling clean enough yet?"

"Yes, definitely." Fawnlock said.

"Good, because you might feel a bit chilly when I turn this off," John said as he stopped the water with a turn of the handle. He shivered a bit right away.

Once the water stopped, Fawnlock felt a thousand chills race up his spine. He immediately made a grab for a towel hanging beside the shower and draped it over his shoulders like he would a blanket.

John chuckled and reached for another towel, thankful that he had put a couple of them there. He instantly rubbed his head to get most of the water out of his hair before drying himself off properly. "Come on, you can't just stand there and do nothing," he told Fawnlock. "The sooner you get to drying yourself, the quicker you'll get warm again."

Fawnlock did his best to mirror exactly what John was doing with his towel, and found himself drying off more quickly. Before, Fawnlock had used the sun to dry his fur. But now he realised that a towel was much more efficient. Once his entire body was dry, more or less, he wrapped the towel back over his shoulders; unaware that he had neglected his hair.

Now that John was dry, for the most part, he was about to exit the bathroom to get some clean clothes, but stopped when he heard a distinct dripping sound still coming from Fawnlock's direction. He turned towards him, and had to stifle a giggle at the sight. The fact that this impossibly tall, usually graceful being had resorted to shrinking into himself while wrapped in a towel was too adorable not to smile at.

"You know I'm not going to let you get my cottage all wet because you won't dry your hair," John said with a small grin, and then lifted up his own towel towards Fawnlock's head. "May I?"

"Mm. Sure." Without any hesitation, Fawnlock leaned forward in John's direction. He felt the towel drape around his head, and then John's hands shake it across his hair. As soon as John let up, Fawnlock stood up straight and noticed his dry hair had fallen over his eyes.

Seeing Fawnlock's hair all poofed up and all over the place made John snicker, and then actually let out a laugh. Fawnlock glared at him, but John wasn't able to contain his laughter.

"I'm sorry, it's just... Well, look at you!" he said before another wave of giggles caught him off guard.

Fawnlock pulled his hair from his eyes and took a look in the mirror. His head of curls had turned into a fuzzy, terrible mess. Fawnlock didn't know what else to do, so he tried smoothing his hands over it. Unfortunately, it only made things worse.

John laughed, and took Fawnlock's hand in his, still trying to stifle his chuckles because of the look on Fawnlock's face. "Come on," John said as he pulled Fawnlock closer to the mirror and towards the cabinets. "Let's see if I have something that can tame that beast on your head."

Fawnlock didn't even question John. Instead, he allowed himself to be led to wherever John wanted him to be.

Rummaging through the cabinets, John searched for something that could potentially keep Fawnlock's apparently mad curls under control for a while. Just to get most of it out of his eyes. He breathed a small "hah!" when he found an old tube of gel he could use. "Here we go, this ought to do it," he said as he presented the tube to Fawnlock. "The keyword being 'ought', of course."

Once the tube was given to him, Fawnlock examined it curiously. He opened it and squeezed a bit onto his hand. Then he ran it through his hair, which caused most of the curls to calm down. Fawnlock was happy to get the hair away from his eyes, at the very least. "Much better, don't you think?" He asked with a smile.

"Oh yes," John replied, and then instinctively ran his own hands through Fawnlock's hair to fix it a bit and get to the spots he had missed. John smiled. "Very dashing, as always," he said, and then suddenly became aware of their current situation. "Ah, yes. Clothes. Might want to get on that..."

"Yes, of course." Fawnlock replied.

As soon as they were dressed, John and Fawnlock wasted the hours away together. John was grateful that neither of them went back on their pact, but he could already tell that something was changing between them. It was like seeing a piece of the puzzle, but not the entire picture. Whether or not this was a good thing, John didn’t know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Harina - Deer spirit. 
> 
> Hey guys thanks for all the feedback. We truly appreciate every single kudo, bookmark and comment. Thanks for sticking with us. See you next Saturday!


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome to a new chapter! If you're confused about any of the vocabulary, the list is in the end notes. Enjoy!

To Fawnlock, every new day as an inukom was another gift. He lived as though each one was his last, and made the most of it. Fawnlock did this by helping John with the garden, and simply sharing his time with John as much as possible.

Through this transformation, he realised how fragile he was; despite his natural build. But he missed being harina. Even if it was just to hear the plants and trees surrounding their home. Fawnlock wished to continue to create and tend to the forest. Every now and then he'd have a far-off look in his eye, but hid it well from John. Or so he believed.

As the day had ended and the two of them had eaten their fill, John and Fawnlock began to settle down. Fawnlock was being uncharacteristically quiet as he pulled back the bed's sheets.

For his part, John hadn't noticed anything that much out of the ordinary. He was used to Fawnlock getting lost in his thoughts every once in a while, and for him to stay quiet during that time was no surprise.

What did come off as a surprise, though, was the fact that Fawnlock was coming off as more distracted than usual lately. Especially in the evenings, which was John's favourite time to cuddle up and chat a bit after a good day. Now, Fawnlock seemed too out of it to even notice John. So he decided to take matters into his own hands.

John shifted so that he could comfortably wrap himself around Fawnlock, and gently kissed his neck. "Is everything alright?" he asked softly.

Fawnlock placed his hands on top of John's, and breathed a small sigh. "Yes, everything's fine. It's just... as much as I've enjoyed being inukom, I almost miss being harina." He admitted.

"Hm. 'Almost', or 'actually'?" John asked, now sort of getting the feeling of what was going on in Fawnlock's mind. But only sort of.

There was a small silence between them as Fawnlock reflected on the question. "...Alright, so I miss it more than I initially thought I would." He nearly grumbled. "I just didn't want to say anything, because you seem to like this form."

At that, John's eyes snapped open and he had to fight back the urge to shove Fawnlock on his back and loom over him. Instead, he simply tightened his hold on him. "If you're going to say something like you feel like I love you more as a human than harina, then let me just stop you right there," John told him, still keeping his voice calm. "Is this what's been bothering you lately? That you want to change back but don't want to disappoint me?"

"...Yes." Fawnlock admitted as though he had confessed a crime.

Still keeping himself close, John kissed Fawnlock again. "Stop it. Just stop this, okay? Do I have to remind you that you didn't have to be human for me to fall in love with you?" John said, trying his best to be reassuring. "Why would this change anything?"

"I know that. But at the same time, you said you feel more comfortable around me when I'm like this. And that when I'm harina you felt like you would offend me in some way. You’ve also done things with me as a human that you hadn’t when I was harina. " Fawnlock said. "Perhaps if I found the lisica, and we found a way for me to stay like this..."

This time, John did shove Fawnlock on his back, though not nearly as aggressively as he had thought about. "Okay, shut up, Fawnlock. Shut- up. Whatever I said about your other form is still here, for your information. Just because you're human, doesn't mean I still don't want to be careful about what you're used to as a harina and what not. And you are not staying human. You are turning back when the time comes, and you know that's going to be for the best, for both of us."

All Fawnlock could do was stare and listen intently to John's words. When he had finished speaking, Fawnlock looked into John's eyes. "Will you be happy?"" He asked tentatively.

John didn't know if he wanted to laugh or cry at that. He settled with lowering himself down to kiss Fawnlock's forehead before replying. "Of course I will. It's how it's supposed to be."

Fawnlock felt as though a huge weight was lifted from him when John responded. He smiled at John and lifted his hand to cup his mate's face. "Yes. Of course."

"Okay? So just... try not to doubt me so much, alright?" John said before placing a light kiss on Fawnlock's lips. "Because you know I love you. No matter how you look. You could turn back now, and I wouldn't care about it in the least. None of this is about how you look, Fawnlock. You’re still you, no matter what kind of form you take."

Upon hearing that, Fawnlock grinned and squirmed a little. "Understood. And I love you too. I just want you to be happy, that's all." He said.

"I am if you are," John replied. "And if you're happy when you're harina, then I'll be more than happy to stay by your side as your very inukom mate."

A small chuckle escaped Fawnlock when he heard John speak his native tongue. "Alright then."

John smiled, and lay back down on his side, seeing no point in looming over Fawnlock now that he had gotten his point across. John draped himself over him, lying on his shoulder and taking deep breaths. Despite all that, John wasn't entirely relaxed, because there was another matter that had been gnawing at him for a while. He bit his lip and spoke: "While we're on this subject, though, I, uh... I have to tell you something. A confession, sort of."

Fawnlock took a look at John and saw his expression turn to nervousness. "What is it?" He urged.

"It's about our... our pact," John continued, feeling both extremely embarrassed and guilty for saying this. "About bonding."

The moment Fawnlock heard that, it didn't take much for him to piece together what John was trying to say. "You... you mean...?" He asked as he searched John's eyes.

"I mean... I'm starting to have second thoughts about- y’know, bonding," John finally admitted, feeling somewhat ashamed of himself. "And that's just me, you know. I... If you feel differently, then that's fine."

"Of course not..." Fawnlock breathed. "There's no one else in the five realms I'd rather bond with." He said as he placed his hand reassuringly on John's face. "Do you... Should we... Now, or...?" He asked with some hesitation.

John shook his head, taking Fawnlock's hand on his face in his own, and kissed the inside of it before putting it back in place. "No. I want to wait until you've turned back," John stated. "Otherwise it wouldn't feel right. Like I told you, I'd be cheating."

Fawnlock felt relieved to hear John say those words. "Yes. Alright, we'll wait." He agreed with a nod. "I prefer that we wait, anyways. I want to be with you in my true form as well." Then Fawnlock paused for a moment and allowed the smile slip from his face. "Are you sure about this, John? You said that you'd never bond with me either way." The spirit was curious as to why his mate had changed his mind.

At that, John looked down a bit, embarrassment and guilt filling him up once again. "Yeah, I... I thought that was what I wanted. I thought that's what you wanted too," he admitted. "But then we had that snogging session a few days ago, and it's... It's like everything changed. You were more enthusiastic about it, which made me more willing. Not only that, but also, well, now I can really see you." Fawnlock seemed confused, so John elaborated. "When you're covered with fur, that's all I see, you know? But now I know what's hidden underneath it, and I just... realise what I've been missing."

"I see." Fawnlock replied, "Well, to be honest, I changed my mind weeks ago. When we were both in the garden and I... well when I was licking you." He admitted with a large blush on his face. "And one of the reasons I became human was because I thought it... our bond might have been easier for you to come to terms with."

"To be fair, you were sort of right," John said, a faint smile tugging at his lips. "Seeing you human did make me reconsider it. But that doesn't mean I want to bond with you as a human. I want to make it as natural as possible."

Fawnlock gave John his own smile and nodded. "Good. I'm glad."

John reached up to kiss Fawnlock's jaw, extremely thankful that this had all been mutual, and not just a stupid decision on his part. "So... It's actually happening, then," he then said in a hushed voice.

"Yes." Fawnlock told John in the same volume. He then leaned more towards John and gave him a small nuzzle out of pure excitement and joy.

"Then I might have to step into town for a few, uh... supplies," John said as he nuzzled back, already getting a bit eager about Fawnlock's change back. Not just because of this - goodness no, it was mainly because he really missed his deer.

The moment Fawnlock heard that he began to become even more excited. "Could I come with you?" Fawnlock asked.

For a second, John wondered if that would be a good idea, but was instantly able to convince himself that it was. After all, Fawnlock wasn't going to see the town any other way, so why not use the opportunity? "Sure you can," he replied. "It'll be a lot different, though. More noise and all. And more people."

"Obviously. I think I could handle it, though. I would like to see other inukom." Fawnlock said.

"Well, you would, wouldn't you?" John said with a grin. "Can't really blame you, though. I loved seeing other spirits, even if half of the ones I met wanted me dead."

"Very true. But I protected you. And I'll continue to do so, for as long as I live." Fawnlock replied before giving John a small kiss on his lips.

John let himself be kissed just before he remembered something, and pulled back with a small "mmf!" He lifted himself up, and placed his hand on Fawnlock's chest. "Don't forget the time I saved you from A, getting hit with a killing blast, and B, from becoming a demon," he said in a playfully scolding manner. He then laughed. "So I guess the feeling's mutual."

"I guess so." Fawnlock said as he gave John a wide grin and held him close in his arms. They remained that way until they both drifted off to sleep.

\--

As soon as the two were awake, they both got dressed and had their breakfast. Soon afterward, Fawnlock and John headed out to town. Fawnlock, being a wandering spirit, was prepared to walk the distance before John stopped him.

"Whoa there," John called. "We're not walking all that way, Fawnlock. That'd take far longer than necessary. Come on, I'll show you a quicker way."

Fawnlock grew a curious expression and followed John around the cabin and down a large pathway. A larger shed that Fawnlock had seen before countless times, even though he never knew what was inside, came into view.

"I try not to use it too much," John told Fawnlock as he opened the shed, "especially since it's not exactly environmentally friendly. And... It’s sometimes kind of hard to operate. But it will get us to town far quicker than on foot, so we'll just have to compromise." John signaled for Fawnlock to follow him inside the shed, just before he opened the larger door on the front. Inside was an old car, and John reached for the keys hanging on the wall beside it. "Come on, then."

Though John had invited him inside, Fawnlock stayed at the mouth of the shed and observed. He had never seen anything like it in his entire life. Fawnlock didn't know what to make of it. Was it a beast? And how was it going to get them to town? He watched as John reached for the side of it, and opened a door. Fawnlock eyed the other side of the thing and walked towards it. He did exactly as John had and managed to open the door on his own.

Fawnlock only looked at John from the other side. "What is this?" He asked.

John looked over to his left side, where Fawnlock was still standing on the outside. "It's a car," he replied simply. "Sort of... machine-ish, really. Might startle you a bit when I turn it on. Get in, and see for yourself."

Cautiously, Fawnlock pulled himself inside and sat down in the seat. He closed the door and sat in anxious silence.

With a small smile, John lightly patted Fawnlock's thigh once he was seated, and looked at him reassuringly. "Relax, will you? It won't bite," John told him, and then started the car. Since it was so underused, it took a while to get it running, and when John turned the key, there was a loud noise that the car would not have made under any other circumstances.

The moment Fawnlock relaxed, the car made a violent noise that shook him to his very core. He jumped a little off his seat, and even more so when he heard a loud rumbling sound. Fawnlock put his hands on the window and the edge of the seat, as if to brace himself for an inevitable attack. For a moment, he believed the contraption _would_ bite him.

"Whoa, hey," John said softly once the car was up and running, and shifted in his seat so that he was able to run his hand up and down Fawnlock's back in what he hoped was a soothing manner. "It's okay, love. It's just a bit old, is all." Never before had John looked at the human Fawnlock and been so aware that he was actually just a spirit in disguise. It was as if he had already changed back. John smiled and tried to do something familiar so that Fawnlock's fright would subside, and gently rubbed the back of his neck and through his hair. "It's not alive; it's okay."

Though his heart was pounding fiercely inside his chest, Fawnlock willed himself to calm down. He was comforted by John's voice, and especially his touch. Fawnlock released a sigh of relief, released his grip on the car and looked at John with a weak smile. "Thank you. I don't know what's gotten into me. You're obviously not afraid. I should trust you."

John smiled. "It's fine. I probably should've given you a better warning anyway," he said as he gave Fawnlock one last pat before turning his attention to the car again. "Alright. So, let us leave to do our questionable shopping and show you another human or two."

\--

As soon as the car had stopped Fawnlock slowly opened the door and got out carefully. He felt as though his entire world was spinning, and he had lost his balance. Fawnlock could hardly believe the speeds that they had reached while travelling along. It was like something out of a dream. Fawnlock held onto the door as though it was the only thing keeping him grounded.

For his own part, John only stretched for a moment when he got out of the car, and then walked over to where Fawnlock was still clinging on to the open door. He patted his shoulder. "You okay?"

"Yes." Fawnlock responded immediately. "Yes, I'm fine." He said as he stood up properly and shut the car door. After a moment Fawnlock chose to look around him. Surrounding them were other cars, and structures; but there were also other humans. Just as John had said, there was a lot more noise, but Fawnlock remained surprisingly calm.

As if by pure instinct, but also as a soothing gesture, John took Fawnlock's hand and squeezed it. "Alright then," he said simply and nodded towards the shop in front of them. "We should be able to get what we need in there. Some people might look at us in a weird, and maybe not entirely kind manner, but just ignore it."

Fawnlock was confused. "Well alright, but I don't understand. We're both human now, isn't that enough?" He asked as they walked on.

"It should be, when you think about it," John explained. "But some people don't take it too kindly when two persons of the same gender are together. I for one say they're all a bunch of twats for thinking it in the first place, but you know. To each their own, I guess."

When John explained, Fawnlock agreed with him. But he still felt frustrated and disheartened. "I see." He replied thoughtfully. Upon entering the building, Fawnlock looked around and felt his initial excitement return when he saw more humans inside.

Right when John took the first step into the shop, he felt a bit awkward. He knew he shouldn't care, especially since he didn't even know any of these people, and rarely if ever saw them, but his mind decided to remind him that he was striding in hand in hand with his male mate, and about to buy sex supplies. He hoped it wasn't showing on his face.

"So, lead the way." Fawnlock urged John.

Should he make a detour? Take a few extra things for the kitchen, maybe? Not that he needed any; it would just seem a bit weird to only buy the supplies and nothing else. But of course, that was the point. So instead of worrying about it so much, John made his way to the supplies, still holding Fawnlock's hand, and ignoring the few glances they received. Most of them were positive, than not (John even could have sworn that a couple of girls had to stifle some kind of noise when looking at the two of them).

Fawnlock was aware of the stares, but didn't reflect much upon it. Instead, he chose to focus on John and the various items on the shelves. Everything was new and interesting to him. Especially the fascinating scents that lingered in the air. Every time a human or two would pass, a different scent hit him. Though none was more intriguing than John's. Upon this realisation, Fawnlock felt panic fill his entire being. His whole world seemed to stop, but he quickly realised that it was only he and John reaching their destination. "John..."

"Yes, yes, I know, it's a bit too colourful to be even remotely considered adult..." John replied almost instantly as he shuffled through the numerous boxes and bottles for something that was both fairly priced, and would get the job done.

There was a brief moment of time where Fawnlock began to consider hiding the fact that he was in the process of changing back from John. He seemed content and so blissfully unaware of Fawnlock's worry. He didn't want to pressure him in any way. That changed, however when Fawnlock reached for a box and noticed a few dark spots on his arms starting to present themselves. Fawnlock withdrew his arm and held it close. "John, I think I'm changing back." He told him.

At that, John instantly turned to Fawnlock with his eyes wide. "Are you serious?" He then looked down at Fawnlock's hand and noticed the spots, and swallowed. "We should probably hurry up before your antlers grow back. Or your tail," he said as he snatched the bottle he had been looking at just now, and a suitable box.

"Yes," Fawnlock replied with a quick nod.

"Alright. Never mind any damn looks," John said hurriedly as he shoved the supplies in one hand, and grabbed Fawnlock's hand with the other. "We are getting out of here and fast."

Fawnlock trailed close behind as they moved through the store. It was at this moment, Fawnlock wished he had asked Vixene about the rate of the transformation back to a spirit. It seemed to be quick, but Fawnlock decided that was only because he was under pressure. Luckily, he hadn't felt his fur, tail, or antlers return yet, so they were still in the clear.

John rushed the two of them as fast as he could through the shop, wanting to get out of there as soon as possible. Those hopes were promptly shattered, however, when he saw the queue in front of the cashiers. He cursed under his breath and pulled Fawnlock along, hoping that the people before him would be quick.

The worry inside Fawnlock began to fill him up even more when he eyed the line. They approached it, where Fawnlock waited anxiously. As they waited, he began to feel a slight itch on his arm. Before it became intolerable, Fawnlock released John's hand and scratched it. He froze when he felt a small tuft of fur.

When he saw Fawnlock tense, John's worry immediately increased, and he tried to see if there was any progress in the queue. So far, only one person of the three before John had left, and already he was growing hugely impatient. And panicked, now that he thought about it. "Fur already coming back?" he whispered at Fawnlock.

"Yes." Fawnlock breathed as he continued to itch his arm. As time passed he felt a small pain on his head. He reached and felt a small bump on the top of his head.

"Come on, come on..." John muttered impatiently, hating the fact that this had to have happened now and not on the way to town. He gave Fawnlock's hand a small squeeze. "You okay over there?"

"I think my alieni roh are growing _back_..." Fawnlock blurted the last word in voji, unintentionally of course.

John all but jumped when he heard the last word, and this time he knew he was definitely panicking. "Okay, we need to get this over with," he said impatiently. "If only we could-- Oh, bloody hell!" he suddenly exclaimed and let out a small laugh. He then shoved his hand in his pocket. "You need to hide, so you should get in the car."

Fawnlock grinned as soon as he saw John produce the keys. "Of course." He agreed excitedly. Immediately, Fawnlock took the keys from John and gave him a small kiss on the cheek in praise. "I'll see you in the car." He said before stepping out of line.

"Will do," John replied with a small chuckle, giving Fawnlock's hand one last squeeze before he ran off. At least now his mate would be well concealed, for the most part.

When Fawnlock reached outside of the store, he ran towards the car as fast as he could. Once he found it, he took one of the keys and put it into the door. When it failed to turn, he became confused. Fawnlock withdrew the key and picked another one. As soon as that one failed, Fawnlock began to feel more panicked than before. He had seen John lock and unlock many doors before, but for some reason the car door wouldn't budge. Fawnlock had no choice but to use each key. In the window's reflection he could see the markings on his face return, which made him panic further. Finally, he heard the door unlock and he pulled it open immediately to hide inside.

John was still growing impatient even when he knew that Fawnlock was hidden now. He wanted to get a sight of his mate in his natural form as soon as possible, and if these people didn't move faster he would probably miss the last parts of the transformation.

The transformation from human to spirit was less than magical, and was just as painful. Fawnlock's skull felt like it was going to burst, and there was a searing pain in his lower back. He did everything to bite back the screams. It felt as though he had been writhing in the car's seat for ages before the pain in his back ceased.

As if my some miracle, the person in front of John saw that he had only two items whereas they had a whole basket, and decided to let him switch places. He took the offer gratefully, especially since that meant he was next. Finally, he would be able to get out of this shop and back home with a fully transformed Fawnlock. John paid quickly and, ignoring the giggles and stares he received because of what he had bought, ran out of the shop and to his car. Before he even went inside, he could tell that Fawnlock was in considerable pain, and so he opened the door quickly and slid into his seat before closing it again.

Every sound enhanced the moment Fawnlock heard the door open. He heard John's clothes slide against the seat of the car. More than that, he could hear John's heartbeat and his breath. Though he was comforted by John's presence, he was still curled in on himself, clutching his head in pain. Slowly, he felt his alieni roh grow from his skull.

"Oh God..." John breathed, unsure of what to do. He wanted to be something for Fawnlock to hold onto. He wanted to hold onto Fawnlock because he was actually feeling a bit scared now. But at the same time, he wasn't sure if it was safe to touch Fawnlock in this state, in case everything hurt, and an out coming touch would make it worse. "Fawnlock...?" John said softly as he reached out a hand.

Once Fawnlock heard his name, he forced himself to at least acknowledge his mate. He felt his head pound as soon as his alieni roh reached to their intended height. With tears in the edges of his eyes, he placed his face into the palm of John's hand, and put his hand on top of his. Fawnlock couldn't speak for a moment due to the shock. When he found his voice it was broken. "J- John."

John could have cried himself from the way Fawnlock looked, and the fact that his voice was breaking only made matters worse. He moved over as far as he could, and then put his other hand on the other side of Fawnlock's face, pulling himself closer and bringing their foreheads together. "It's okay, you'll be okay," he said softly. "I'm here, it's okay."

Heavy breaths tumbled from Fawnlock, as he tried to regain it. The pounding in his head was ebbing away slightly, now that he had completed his transformation. "Never again. Never again, John." He breathed.

"No, never," John repeated, and then lightly kissed Fawnlock's forehead, the familiar tickle of his fur a very welcome thing. "I'm not letting you go through that ever again, no matter what."

Soon Fawnlock felt his head spinning, and the world fading in and out. He was absolutely exhausted from all the pain he had endured. It didn't take long until all he could see was darkness.

\--

When Fawnlock awoke, he became aware of his surroundings. He was back at the cottage, and tucked into their bed. Though he couldn't remember how he had gotten there, he assumed John had taken care of him. Fawnlock blinked before looking around the cottage and noticed that his John was missing. He curled in on himself a little, feeling a slight panic rise in his chest again. "J- John?" He called.

Although John had no idea how long it would take for Fawnlock to regain consciousness, he still kept himself within earshot, never going far enough that he wouldn't be aware of any changes in Fawnlock's state. He had been extremely worried when Fawnlock blacked out, and not knowing how much the creature could have handled of the transforming made him even more frightened. So he had taken it upon himself to make sure Fawnlock would be okay.

A call from the bedroom snapped John back into reality from what he was doing (reading, although it was more looking at words than actually following any story), and he hurried towards it. The moment he saw Fawnlock curled into himself, looking so scared and fragile, John approached the bed and crouched down in front of it so that he was level with his mate. He took Fawnlock's hands in his, and smiled reassuringly. "Yes, I'm here," John told him. "It's over; you're back."

Fawnlock was so relieved to see John; he immediately pulled him by his hands in order to take him into an embrace. "Yes, over." He breathed.

John held him close, surprising even himself at how much he had missed Fawnlock's true form. "How are you feeling?" he then had to ask.

"Better, with you." Fawnlock told John. There was no trace of the pain he had felt before. The pounding that his alieni roh had given him ceased. He felt his magic flowing through him. "Much better."

"Good. I'm so glad to hear that," John said before pulling out of the embrace only slightly, but keeping his hands on Fawnlock's upper arms. He looked at Fawnlock's face and smiled at the familiarity of it all. "You gave me a bit of a scare back there."

Fawnlock shared John's smile until he heard those last words. "I was, scared too. So much pain..."

John nodded. "Yes, I figured," he said as he brought one hand to Fawnlock's face to lightly trace his cheek. "And it kills me to know that you went through that sort of thing alone the first time."

"I'm sorry. Never again." Fawnlock told John as he leaned into John's touch.

"Don't apologise," John said almost immediately and then planted a small kiss on Fawnlock's forehead. "I'm just glad you're back, and that the pain is over."

Fawnlock nodded slightly, "Yes. Me too. I love you." He told him.

"And I, you," John replied, smiling, and then leaned in for a proper kiss, still ever careful because of Fawnlock's current state.

Fawnlock kissed John back just as lightly, grateful for his kindness and love.

John wasn't sure if Fawnlock was just copying his own motions, or if he really was exhausted enough to only do this very lightly. He decided that it didn't matter, and continued to do everything carefully, now moving both hands to cup Fawnlock's neck and hold him in place. God, he had missed this. His Fawnlock.

Now that Fawnlock had returned to his true form, he could sense just how happy John was. Out of everything he had lost, Fawnlock had missed his sense of smell. Because he was himself again, he was able to take in John's smell. Even John's touch was electrifying.

After what felt like ages, John let his lips linger for one last smooch before pulling away. He sighed contentedly, and brushed his thumbs along Fawnlock's jaw. "I don't think you realise how much I missed this form," he then said. "Hell, I don't even think I realised it myself until now."

"I have missed it, as well." Fawnlock admitted with a smile. "I have missed seeing you through these eyes, your touch on my fur, and your sweet scent."

John smiled, knowing very well how much Fawnlock loved to smell him. He brought one hand to Fawnlock's forehead to see if he would be able to feel his temperature. "Are you sure you're alright? You still look a bit peaky," he said, having not known how little time it had taken Fawnlock to come running towards him after the first transformation.

"Yes. John, I'm fine." Fawnlock assured him. In fact, he had never felt better in his life. He was grateful to be alive, in his form, and with John.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you've enjoyed the chapter. Let us know by dropping us a kudo or a comment. We really appreciate it!
> 
> Inkuom - Human.  
> Harina - Deer spirit.   
> Voji - Spirit.  
> Alieni roh - The antlers on a Harina.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! I got caught up in school. Here's the newest chapter though!
> 
> Warning: There will be ridiculously hot sex between John and Fawnlock for the next two chapters. If you’re not into that, feel free to skip. If you are, read on ahead!

Fawnlock felt John's happiness dissipate somewhat as they drew into an uncomfortable silence. "Are... you alright?" He asked carefully.

The question was so unexpected that John jerked his head up so fast he almost knocked it into Fawnlock's antlers. "Me? Yeah, I'm good. Bit shaken up about this whole transformation thing but... yes," he rambled, and then looked Fawnlock in the eyes. It was obvious that his answer wasn't satisfactory. "Truth is, I... I can't stop thinking about... well, us bonding." he admitted.

Though Fawnlock wasn't completely sure what John had bought in town, he had concluded it had something to do with their bonding. Thus, John's statement caused Fawnlock to blush and smile a bit. "Why?" He asked, genuinely curious, "Are you, excited? Nervous?" He tried, hoping that by asking, he'd be able to get rid of the apprehension surrounding John's voice.

Fawnlock's smile caused some of John's shame to fade, and he managed a small laugh. "Both, I guess," he said with a shrug. "Excited, because now I know it's something we both want, and it'll... in a way, bring us closer. Nervous because it's a certain first. For both of us. So we're both, sort of, left with- a lot of, you know... options. And questions, for that matter." By the time he stopped talking, John's face could have melted off and it wouldn't have surprised him in the least; it was that hot.

"I see," Fawnlock said with a slight nod. Gently, he pulled away from John's touch and moved over on the bed. "Here, sit down, we'll talk. Perhaps you should, ask first?"

God. John nodded, and then got up to sit on the bed next to Fawnlock. While he was thankful that his mate was willing to talk about this, now that it had started, he had no idea what to say. He had almost come up with a legitimate question when he blurted out a simple: "how?"

The blush on Fawnlock's face deepened. "What do you mean? Surely, you have some idea."

If it was even physically possible, John blushed even more as well. "Well, yeah, but that's not what I, um... what I meant," he said, wishing he had something in his hands to focus on while he spoke. "I mean... which way?"

"Which... way? Are, human always so... specific? Artaldea tell us, bonding is a time of discovery. We speak with our bodies. And become one." Fawnlock explained.

"You guys make everything sound so damn majestic," John said, amused for a second before coming back to the topic at hand. "And yes, it's pretty much the same with humans. Except, you and I, we're not... you know, meant to be entirely compatible, so it means we have to consider that too.”

Fawnlock quietly took John's words into consideration. "I see. Well... how would you, go about it?" He asked.

Finally, John willed himself to look up at Fawnlock, and the moment he met his eyes and saw the innocence behind them, he was rendered speechless. How did he want to go about it? He hadn't actually thought it over that far, only that he had some very annoying 'natural' needs. God. And seeing Fawnlock looking at him so expectantly wasn't helping. Before he could stop himself, he replied: "Either way is fine with me... But maybe you should answer that question. Seeing as how you're the less experienced and all."

Upon hearing that Fawnlock looked away in thought; his cheeks pounding in embarrassment. "Right. Of course." He replied shortly as he thought about his answer. "I think... I want you to, be inside of me." He admitted.

Oh God. John swallowed, and willed himself not to look away as well. "And you're sure of that?" he asked tentatively.

"Yes. I'm sure." Fawnlock told John.

"Okay," John breathed, and then cleared his throat. "Okay, then. Guess the only thing left of the practical stuff is, when?" He paused. "I mean, I know you were up to it the other night, but I just thought, given all this new information, you might want to... have some time. Or something."

"It doesn't matter." Fawnlock said as he reached for John's hand. "We have, all the time in the world."

At that, John smiled and gave Fawnlock's hand a small squeeze. "You're right," he said softly. "And it's not like we have to worry about rushing things at this point. We've been mates for ages."

"Exactly." Fawnlock said before giving John a small kiss on his cheek.

It was as if Fawnlock had worked some kind of magic on John, because the moment his lips came in contact with John's face, John could feel warmth spread throughout his body from the single touch. He tried to shake away the feeling, but it wouldn't leave. "Mind you, though... It could be everything you may or may not have been told back home, or it could potentially be disastrous," he suddenly heard himself say. "Especially since I have no idea how you go about this in your society."

"John. You're thinking too much." Fawnlock said as he pulled away slightly. "We are mates, for life. No one has claimed me. I am madly in love with you. So there is, nothing you could say that would convince me it won't be anything less than… perfect." He told John, emphasizing the end of his sentence with another kiss.

John could instantly tell he was both thinking and talking too much, and at first only laughed at his own nerves. But then Fawnlock kissed him again, and there was another heat wave, and his anxieties washed away. He turned so that he was facing Fawnlock, and used his free hand to cup his face so he could bring their lips together.

Fawnlock was pleasantly surprised by John's kiss, and welcomed it by kissing back. He could sense John's eagerness, which only amplified his own. Without much thought, Fawnlock tried pulling John closer to him. There was an instinctive need inside his mind to protect, claim and satisfy John in any possible way.

Although they had certainly had their fair share of snogging sessions, this time it felt different. And John knew exactly why. He released Fawnlock's hand and brought it to the back of his mate's neck, running his fingers through both his fur and eventually his dark curls. His other hand slid from Fawnlock's face to his shoulder, down his arm, and took its place on his hip.

Now that Fawnlock was left to use his nose to breathe, he could take in John's intoxicating scent. The very same scent that had driven him to John's arms, to this very moment, was filling up inside him. Fawnlock moved his hands along John's body to his back, only to realise that he was the only one still clothed.

The fact that this was happening was still confusing John, especially since they had made a promise not to. And yet here they were, everything consensual, completely mutual, and- oh God had John's back always been so sensitive? He was faintly aware of Fawnlock's hands stopping for a moment, so he pulled back from the kiss, but kept their lips touching. "What?" he breathed, oblivious to Fawnlock's realisation.

"Your clothes..." Fawnlock pointed out.

"What about-- Oh, right." With a little laugh, John reached down to the hem of his t-shirt and pulled it off before looking back into Fawnlock's eyes. "Better? For now, at least?"

The moment he looked at John, Fawnlock gave him a wide grin. "Yes, definitely." He said before capturing John's lips again.

As John continued to kiss back, he started moving both of them downwards until they were both lying across the bed. He then propped himself up on one elbow and used his other hand to caress Fawnlock's side as he tangled their legs together.

Fawnlock splayed his hands across John's chest until they wrapped around his back again. He welcomed the sensation of being crowded and handled in such a way.

For the first time, John dared to move his hand even lower, and came in contact with Fawnlock's thigh, where it stayed for a moment. He then trailed his hand up Fawnlock's stomach, his chest, and up to his neck, allowing himself to lightly trace Fawnlock's jawline before pulling back from the kiss again. He did so only slightly, so that there was barely any distance between them. He looked deep into Fawnlock's silvery eyes, and smiled. "Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?" he asked in a hushed voice.

As John touched him, Fawnlock felt a deep flame ignite in the very core of his being. Everywhere John touched, Fawnlock pushed himself into his mate's loving and wandering hand. When he pulled away Fawnlock was left breathless, even more so when he heard the small statement from John's lips. By now, his memory was foggy, so he couldn't truly recall. "N- no." He admitted.

"I can't believe it..." John breathed. Had he really only ever thought about it? Surely he must have said it out loud at least once, right? Well, he was going to change that. "I should be shot for that. Again," he said as he gently ran his thumb over Fawnlock's lips. "Because you are, Fawnlock. You are the most beautiful living being I've ever seen."

A smile tugged on Fawnlock's lips, and he felt a huge weight leave him. After days of insecurity and doubt, he felt more reassured than ever with the way he looked. Unfortunately, his newfound confidence did nothing to diminish the deep blush that flushed his face. "Thank you." He said before giving John a light kiss. "And you are, handsome."

John smiled, loving the way Fawnlock had beamed at his statement. He then let out a small laugh at getting his own compliment. "I think I can live with that," he said, for once only mildly aware of his self-consciousness over his appearance. He then leaned in again for another kiss, thankful to have gotten his message across; one that he knew he would keep saying for the rest of his life.

Fawnlock kissed back enthusiastically, in hopes to express his love and sincerity. He pulled his hands back towards him so that he could trace more of John's body. With both hands on John's chest, Fawnlock allowed one hand to slip across to his neck until it settled in his hair.

John had wanted to control himself, at least until he was completely stripped, but the joined sensations of Fawnlock running his hands on his bare skin and then feeling one in his hair made him let out a small sound of appreciation. He continued kissing Fawnlock, now moving his hand down his side again, back up, and lightly trailed his fingers down Fawnlock's torso.

The sound that John made was both surprising and exciting. He wanted nothing more than to elicit more pleasant noises from John. But with the faint touch of John's fingers, he couldn't help but admit a small whimper of his own.

Unwanted shivers ran down John's spine when he heard the sound, which was something he had never heard before. He kept trailing his fingers downwards until he came in contact with Fawnlock's thigh again, and so he delicately traced the inside of it, testing the reaction.

The initial heat Fawnlock had felt before amplified significantly when John moved his fingers across his fur. Even more so when he reached to the inner part of his leg. He felt another sound erupt from him as he instinctively moved his leg so John could have more access.

When Fawnlock moved his leg - not to mention made that sound - John took it as a sign that he was doing something right, so he kept tracing. Eventually, he couldn't stop himself from giving Fawnlock's thigh a firm grip before settling his hand there. God he wished he could use both hands, if only because Fawnlock seemed to really like what he was doing.

Fawnlock gave a bit of a longer groan at the touch, and squirmed a little as he felt himself growing slightly impatient. He ran his fingers through John's hair, to show just how much he needed this. His other hand settled on John's back again, just before he smoothed it over John's side.

Another shiver. And God John's trousers were getting uncomfortable. Nevertheless, he got the feeling that Fawnlock wanted something more than just a still touch, so he started moving his hand again, slowly inching his way to Fawnlock's behind.

The moment John touched him Fawnlock let out a deeper moan. He had no idea how sensitive everything would be under these circumstances. His entire body was practically on fire, and the blood in his veins was pounding.

Fawnlock was being extremely responsive, even for someone whose entire society didn't rely on touches nearly as much as humans did, if at all. So despite his own urges - not to mention being extremely worked up at this point - John made an effort to both be delicate, but also draw out as much pleasure as he could from his touches. After all, Fawnlock had never done anything like this before, so why not make it as good as possible?

As John touched him in such delicate ways, Fawnlock became more and more responsive. He was completely overwhelmed with desire. Fawnlock mirrored a few of John's touches, just to get a sense of his own reactions. How they both believed they could live without this, Fawnlock didn't know.

Although John had wanted to put it off for a while, he couldn't help but flick his fingers over Fawnlock's more sensitive area once he started mirroring him. He hadn't meant to, but honestly, the feeling surprised him, so he explored further. He had gone so long without actually thinking about, or truly seeing, for the most part, Fawnlock's genitals that he hadn't expected the area to be so... well, for a lack of a better word, human.

Another groan ripped from Fawnlock's throat as John placed his hand around his makila. His soft touch against his hardened flesh was unlike anything Fawnlock had experienced. He instinctively arched into it, desperate for more friction.

That was much more of a reaction than John had expected, but he was absolutely certain that it was a positive one. John took Fawnlock in his hand and set a slow, steady pace, wanting to make Fawnlock feel good, but at the same time knowing he had to be careful with someone who had never been touched like this. He released Fawnlock's lips, and left trails of kisses on his chin, jawline, and down his neck, ignoring the tickling fur.

When John let go of the kiss, Fawnlock was breathless and gasping. He felt as though he had been submerged under water, and only had just come up for air. He craned his neck, allowing John more access to it. The fingers threaded through John's hair continued to wander his scalp in encouragement. "Oh, John," he breathed.

Fawnlock's gasping only made John want this even more, but the way he had breathed his name seemed to send his blood boiling. The single utterance caused yet another shiver, although this time it was far more pleasurable. John worked his way downwards again, kissing every possible place he could think of as he kept stroking.

Though Fawnlock had lost his grip on John, he didn't mind at all. The shower of kisses along his body made up for the loss of warmth. He had no idea what John was doing, but Fawnlock was blinded by the sheer pleasure he was feeling throughout his entire body. As John went lower down his body, Fawnlock lifted his head in curiosity. "John...?"

John had just reached the middle of Fawnlock's abdomen when he spoke, and so he looked up. "What is it?" he asked before continuing in only one spot, but keeping eye contact.

"W- what are you doing?" Fawnlock asked. It was a genuine question, as much as he enjoyed the kisses along his body, he wanted to be close to John.

Oh hell. John stopped, and lifted himself up from Fawnlock's body, though his hand still lingered. How was he even supposed to answer that question? Point out the obvious? Say is intentions? God. "I'm... trying to make you, uh... feel good," he replied sheepishly. "Is it, bad?"

"N- no. Not at all." Fawnlock reassured John with a smile. "I just, wonder why you are down there."

God Fawnlock was so innocent. And ironically, sugarcoating it would probably confuse him even more. So, despite the raging blush in his face, John admitted: "Honestly? I was working my way to..." Well, there was no delicate way of putting it, was there? Not with words, anyway. John was about to continue speaking when he figured that it would be better to just show it. He gave Fawnlock's stomach one last kiss before positioning himself downwards. From there John saw how elegant his mate’s prick stood firm from his pubic hair. John gained a small grip on Fawnlock, then stuck out his tongue, and licked up the shaft.

Oh. Fawnlock's eyes widened just before John had licked his makila. In that moment, Fawnlock understood everything once John had done what he had set out to do. He let out a sharp gasp and grabbed a hold on the sheets in a tight grip. "Oh, yes. More, please." He breathed.

This time, John distinctly felt the shivers travel straight to his groin. Holy hell, he hadn't expected that. And it only encouraged him to hold onto the base, lick up some more, swirl his tongue around the head for a few moments, before eventually taking it into his mouth.

Fawnlock was in absolute bliss for the few moments John continued to lick his makila. The wetness was good, but he felt it wasn't enough. Then Fawnlock gave out a small cry when John took him into his mouth. Never in his entire life had Fawnlock thought such a great pleasure was obtainable. Fawnlock was filled with wonder as he felt John's tongue swirling across his makila. Instinctively, he moved his hips upward into John's mouth in search of more wet heat.

John was a bit out of practice, and so he wasn't sure what to make of the first cry, so he just kept going to see if it was still good. As it turned out, it was apparently very good, so he felt insanely proud of himself for that. He did let out a small muffled sound when Fawnlock pushed into his mouth some more, a bit worried that he would choke, but it turned out alright. And because of that, John set out to take Fawnlock entirely in his mouth. He relaxed his jaw and his throat, and bent down, testing his limits and to see if it would still be good.

The deeper John took Fawnlock in, the more pleasure he felt. His breath became shaky, and his muscles trembled. Fawnlock stared and watched John intently, with some fascination and curiosity. He made a vow to himself to do the same for John. But for now, he just enjoyed what John gave to him.

John continued sucking hard, before he started bobbing his head up and down to see what that would do. He looked up and found Fawnlock staring at him, which probably should have made him feel uncomfortable, as it seemed as if Fawnlock was studying him, but it made him want to keep watching for more reactions.

When they locked eyes, Fawnlock felt a bolt of pleasure shoot to his core. The movement of John's mouth caused his breath to catch in his throat. After that Fawnlock tried to control his breathing; which was coming in deep and short. He wanted to find a way to encourage John, so without any other ideas in his mind he reached to grab the back of John's head.

At first John actually considered halting his motions, seeing as how Fawnlock's breathing was becoming increasingly ragged. That thought was shot down instantly when Fawnlock grabbed his head, which John took as a clear sign that he wanted more. So without knowing what else to do, he decided to put more effort into his sucking, feeling his cheeks hollow each time.

As soon as John started to increase his activity, Fawnlock began to make more pleasurable sounds. When he no longer had the strength to hold up his head, he threw it back into the pillows behind him. Fawnlock closed his eyes and relied solely on every sensation he was feeling. "John," he groaned.

John's jaw was starting to feel a bit strained, but he didn't let up. Again, the way Fawnlock said his name set him completely on fire, and he didn't dare stop. Hell, he would strive to please Fawnlock two, or even three times tonight if he could. So he kept going, and with his hand at the base he gave it a few strokes along with his sucking.

The new attention given to his makila ignited something within Fawnlock. He felt a small pressure beginning to build from deep inside of him. It was a completely new sensation, but Fawnlock welcomed it with open arms. He raked his fingers through John's hair and continued to groan. Fawnlock felt as though he were on the edge of something really great. "Oh, oh John," he panted.

Oh God. John couldn't stop now. Not when he could tell that Fawnlock was just about teetering over the edge. He decided that now was the time to get vigorous, so he did just that, bobbing and stroking faster than he had before. After a few seconds, he knew that he wouldn't need a warning; he could feel Fawnlock about to burst.

Just like that, Fawnlock was overcome with an enormous wave of pleasure. The inside of his body convulsed, and his entire being shook as he gave out a strangled cry. It was his only warning before he felt bizita rise out of him. He was sure he had seen the stars of zerukom before his eyes. His heart was rattling against his chest, and he took in large breaths as he held onto the feeling for as long as he could.

Even though he knew it was coming, John still let out a startled sound when Fawnlock spilled into his mouth. He kept bobbing his head, trying to make the best of it for his mate, and also to get everything and not spilling a drop. Without thinking, he swallowed, and then eventually started slowing down once he felt Fawnlock soften. He gradually stopped for the most part, pausing only to leave one last kiss on the head before lapping at it and then letting go completely. He looked over the panting Fawnlock, and smiled.

Though Fawnlock was sensitive, he found each touch enjoyable. He was amazed with the way John had handled him. Fawnlock felt himself crash back to their realm. After a moment of catching his breath, he lifted his head to see John's smiling face. "That, was, amazing." He commented, still a little breathless.

Despite his pride, John actually found himself blushing at the compliment, which was completely mad, all things considered. Still, he slid up Fawnlock's body and settled above him, his elbows on each side of Fawnlock's head. "Thank you, I guess," he said somewhat sheepishly. "I'd kiss you again, but I think I'll wait a moment. Out of decency, you know."

The truth was Fawnlock didn't know. He simply grinned at John and moved his arms around his mate. "Decency? I believe, you abandoned that the moment my makila met your lips." He teased slightly.

"Oh come on, let me have a gentleman moment, will you?" John replied with an equal amount of teasing in his voice. He was also intrigued by a new word. Makila. God, why did the spirit language always sound much nicer than his did? As he looked down at Fawnlock's cheeky grin, John was reminded of the fact that he had not only neglected himself thus far, but was also still fully clothed waist down. He squirmed a bit, unintentionally making a slightly uncomfortable face for a split second. "I will say this, though. You have some mad stamina for someone who's never done this."

"You, yourself have a lot of endurance." Fawnlock commented as he placed a wandering hand along the front of John's trousers. He could feel John's hardened flesh straining against the cloth. "Allow me to, return the favour."

John couldn't help but let out a small, strangled moan at the touch. God, if this was what one simple brush of a hand did to him fully clothed, he didn't want to know what would happen if Fawnlock touched him directly. Except yes. Yes, he did. He glanced down at his trousers and then back up at Fawnlock again. "Then I should probably get rid of those. And, not stay above you, maybe."

"Mmm, maybe." Fawnlock repeated. Without hesitation, Fawnlock pulled John into a kiss. His hand drew from John's trousers to his chest, and sat up slightly. When he released John's lips he gently turned him over onto his back and hovered over John. "Better?" He asked.

"For this? Absolutely," John replied smugly as he made himself comfortable beneath Fawnlock. He raised one hand up to Fawnlock's face, brushing some of his curls back to get a better look at him. "And you don't have to think of it as a favour. You know I did it all for you."

Fawnlock gave John a warm smile, "Then I'll think of it as a 'thank you'." He said before drawing in for another, deeper, kiss.

Even though it was the second time they had kissed since John had pleasured Fawnlock, he was only now filled with the need to remind him where his mouth had been. However, it didn't seem that Fawnlock minded at all, which encouraged John to slide his hand to the back of Fawnlock's head and pull him closer, somehow managing to deepen the kiss even more.

Now that it was Fawnlock's turn to explore John's body, he was unsure where to begin. He experimentally ran his free hand all along John's chest. By doing so, he was able to catalogue the feeling of John's skin, and the shapes of every muscle. He moved to his collar and dared to trace John's scarred shoulder.

John let himself relax under Fawnlock's soft touch, but couldn't help feeling a few goose bumps whenever Fawnlock reached a particularly sensitive spot on his skin. He hummed at the feeling, loving the gentle way Fawnlock seemed to be studying him. That is until he reached the scarred shoulder, where he tensed momentarily, his hum turning into a muffled grunt for a split second.

Fawnlock pulled his hand away as if he had touched a flame, and broke their kiss to give John an apologetic look. "I'm sorry," he blurted.

"No, no, it's okay," John replied right away, just now aware that he was a bit out of breath. He would have to remember to use his nose some more. "I just wasn't expecting that, is all."

Upon hearing that, Fawnlock felt his face flush. "I was just, trying to feel you." He said in a wavering tone. As if to apologise further, Fawnlock began to kiss along John's jaw.

The initial sting was gone, so John closed his eyes again, enjoying the attention he was being given. He craned his neck up to give more space, and moved his hands to Fawnlock's sides again, and started running them up and down before doing the same to his back. "Feel me all you want," he breathed.

As soon as John had exposed his neck, Fawnlock breathed in John's scent. By the time he was kissing along it, Fawnlock was drowning in his mate's intoxicating scent. The way John was handling him caused Fawnlock to groan a little. He took John's permission and placed his hand down John's side. Fawnlock's kissing began to turn to a series of light nipping with his teeth, as the urge to mark his mate became stronger.

John had never been one to enjoy neck biting, not especially. Unless he was the one doing it, of course. But this was changing his entire worldview, and he wondered why the hell he hadn't ever let this be done to him before. So really, when he clutched at Fawnlock's fur and drawled a long, low, "yesss!" it came as no surprise to him.

Fawnlock took John's reaction as a sign of encouragement. So without a second thought, Fawnlock satisfied his instinctive urge and bit John. He was careful enough so he wouldn't break the skin, but it was enough pressure to leave a mark. His mark. _Mine._

To get bitten this hard was sort of unexpected, but God was it welcomed. The slight pain melted into the already bubbling anticipation John had been feeling, and he subconsciously dragged his nails down Fawnlock's back when he felt it. Fawnlock's voice from days ago echoed in John's mind: 'my instincts tell me to claim you before anyone else does'. The thought made him dig his nails deeper into Fawnlock's skin. "Gahh, do it again," he all but demanded. "Claim me!"

The moment Fawnlock felt John's nails burning against his skin; he felt shivers running up and down his entire body. He gave a slight, pleasurable groan at the feeling. And when he heard John say those words, he felt his core awaken yet again. He followed John's instruction and bit down again, harder this time.

At the second, far harder bite, John practically clawed down Fawnlock's back, equally hard. He squirmed a bit, duly noting that there was far less room in his pants than he would have preferred. "God, yes, Fawnlock," he groaned, his voice low and husky. "Make me yours."

A larger groan ripped from Fawnlock's mouth, which almost came close to sounding like a deep growl. That's when Fawnlock couldn't take it any longer. He released John's neck and licked the markings to soothe it. Fawnlock reached for John's trousers and unfastened them to reach inside. He took his hand to smooth over John's hardened flesh as he felt his own makila come to life.

John had lost his grip on Fawnlock when he had moved down, so he brought his hands to the sheets on both sides, grabbing them hard. He took in a sharp breath when Fawnlock touched him, already halfway in a trance after the biting. He bucked his hips upwards a bit, aching for more already.

Fawnlock was sure he would go mad with desire if this went on for too long, but he knew he had a task to accomplish. So he quickly pulled away John's remaining clothes and threw them off the side of the bed. Then he set a strong and steady pace, knowing that John was more worked up than necessary.

Almost instantly, John threw his head back with a groan and clutched the sheets even harder. His leg muscles tensed, and he kept involuntarily curling and uncurling his toes with each stroke. He began to wonder how the hell he had lasted this long without so much as thinking about touching himself too.

Shortly after John's reaction, Fawnlock wasted no time in taking John into his mouth. He didn't take it completely, but he took in as much as he could for the time being. When faced with that alone, there was so much for Fawnlock to catalogue. The taste, the texture, the smell, everything was new to him.

"Oh, ffffff--!" was the only thing John managed before whatever he was about to say drowned in a long moan. Once again, John was astounded by how fast a learner Fawnlock was, having already been able to reduce him to a panting mess. He wanted to reach down to encourage him somehow, but both his hands were completely locked in the sheets for the moment.

Fawnlock moved his tongue along John's makila, in both curiosity and a way to pleasure him. He mirrored what he remembered John had done to him; taking the bottom and holding it in place with his fingers. He then bobbed his head slightly, to gauge John's reaction.

Each movement caused a jolt of pleasure to course through John, and his moans got louder and longer. Finally, he was able to release one hand from the sheets to put atop of Fawnlock's head, running his fingers through his hair in encouragement. And as an added bonus, John shakily lifted himself up to have a look; he honestly didn't know if it was a brilliant or a horrid decision. Seeing Fawnlock's mouth wrapped around him like that, his head bobbing and his face determined, was almost enough to knock John over.

As soon as John put his hand on Fawnlock's head, he lifted his eyes towards John. When he was able to see his face he felt encouraged. It was here Fawnlock decided to try something that John hadn't. While he continued to move along John's makila, he also took John's silkila into his free hand and rolled the flesh around.

The new feeling should have been predictable, but it was such a surprise that John grabbed a fistful of Fawnlock's hair and held it tight. It also caused him to flop back down on his back, his eyes fluttering closed. "God, F- Fawnlock..." he managed between his ragged panting.

When Fawnlock felt John tighten his grip, he gave a deep groan. As soon as he heard his name fall from his mate's lips, he began to increase the activity of his sucking, and even stroked him. He was becoming more persistent with each passing moment.

John tried to push himself up again, but it was as if his arms were made of jelly, and they wouldn't move. The only thing he could do at this point was to squirm and pant, his tight grip on Fawnlock's hair the only thing keeping him grounded during all of this intensity. Sure enough, though, John soon felt his insides curling, and he was starting to feel desperate for release. Hell, they would both have to go for two tonight, wouldn't they? "Fawn, you're-- Oh God, keep going, just- just like that!"

Upon hearing John's request, Fawnlock continued his pace with a renewed vigour. He swallowed as much of John as he could, and what part he couldn't reach he stroked with his hand. Fawnlock could sense John's peak rising up within him, so he concentrated on giving John everything he was able to give.

"Th- that's it! Just a few more--!" The rest of John's pleads vanished in a loud moan when he felt himself burst right into Fawnlock's mouth. Something in the back of his mind told him that he should let go of Fawnlock's hair so he wouldn't feel trapped, but John's body was so overcome with pleasure that he couldn't bring himself to do it. His grip did slacken, though, but it didn't stop everything from being insanely good. John trembled, panting heavily, wondering if it was actually possible to die from an orgasm.

The moment John let loose inside Fawnlock's mouth, he couldn't help but sputter a little out of surprise. He felt the bizita hit the back of his throat, so he had no choice but to swallow as much as he could. Fawnlock felt John shudder, so he slowed his motions until the grip in his hair loosened. Once he was sure John was done, he lifted himself from his mate's makila and wiped away the remnants from his chin.

John managed to lightly trace Fawnlock's face with his hand before it dropped limply to the side, and the action caused him to snap back into reality. His breathing began slowing down, and he stopped seeing all black. That didn't stop his heart from thumping hard in his chest, making John very aware of the action his neck had gotten. But he was in no mood to care about that, so instead he propped himself up, still shaking slightly, and sighed heavily. "You..." he breathed. "You are... incredible."

Fawnlock smiled at John and climbed to his knees. "Well, I learnt from the best." He grinned as he crawled back on top of John.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Makila - Penis  
> Silkila - Balls  
> Bizita - Cum
> 
> Hope you enjoyed the chapter! The other one will be put up shortly. U uU


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: more hot sex. If you're into that? Carry on. If you're not? Move along.

One of the first things Fawnlock noticed when he faced John, was the large mark on his neck. Though Fawnlock felt proud and possessive, he was worried he had gone too far. "Does it hurt?" He asked quietly; just before he leaned down to soothe it with his tongue.

"The mark? Hahh--" John winced slightly at the wet touch, but quickly got over it. "Not too terribly, no. And well, I did want it so if it did, I'd only have myself to blame. It's not... bleeding, though, is it?" he felt like he needed to ask, as Fawnlock was licking him a bit more than usual.

Fawnlock pulled away slightly. "No, not at all. I was just trying to help relieve the pain..." He explained as he felt a small heat rise to his cheeks, "Well, that and... our scent is strongest there."

John raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean, 'our' scent?" he asked as he brought his hands back to Fawnlock's body, already missing the warmth.

"W- well it's hard to explain, but because of our bond our scents are... melding together. By biting you and bonding with you, you have taken on my scent as well as yours. Similarly, it's been happening to me as well." Fawnlock told John as best as he could.

"So then... if we went back to the tribe, they'd know we're mates? Just because we smell like each other?" John asked, fascinated by the logic.

"Yes, even if we went separately. They wouldn't know who I am with personally, but they would know you were inukom." Fawnlock said.

"Oh, right," John replied, feeling a slight sting that had no business there. "And is that, bad?"

Fawnlock blinked at John before sensing his shame and apprehension. "No. Of course not, no." He expressed before nuzzling John, "I don't need the artaldea. I don't need anyone but you. I am yours and you are mine."

"Yes, of course," John said as he nuzzled back, now wrapping his arms around Fawnlock. "Forgot all about the whole abandoning the tribe business for a second there. And hey, even if you hadn't, we'd still have your family's approval." He finished by giving Fawnlock a small kiss on the nose.

Fawnlock grinned when he felt John kiss him. "Exactly. All because you saved me." He said softly as he placed a hand to John's cheek.

John proceeded to wrap his arms around Fawnlock, so that he could hold him as close as he could- as he needed, to be honest. "Twice, I might add," he said, grinning as well.

"After I saved you, of course." Fawnlock teased just before capturing John's lips.

John would have replied with something witty, but he couldn't be arsed about it. Instead, he fully enveloped Fawnlock in his embrace and kissed him back, pushing back the memories the small conversation had brought back. He focused only on his kissing, wanting to convey all the love he had for Fawnlock, and the joy of getting to have him.

As John kissed him, Fawnlock felt overwhelmed. He was so happy and yet he was still hungry for more. Fawnlock tried to be diligent and patient with his kisses, though. He slipped his hand across John's chest and continued to express his adoration.

The touch made John shiver for the umpteenth time that night, and he found that his skin was suddenly very sensitive. Because of this, he lightly moaned into Fawnlock's mouth and began gently running his hands up and down Fawnlock's back. Because of all these different distractions, he barely even registered the fact that he was smoothing his tongue over Fawnlock's lips between kisses.

When John traced his back, Fawnlock arched into the touch. The moan that echoed into his mouth sent a shock to his core, which reminded Fawnlock how much he was aching. Fawnlock was unsure what to make of the presence of John's tongue, but he didn't let up to ask. Instead, Fawnlock opened his mouth a little further each time.

Yes. Because they had never done this sort of thing before, John made sure to be slow and careful, as he knew Fawnlock would just continue exploring without thinking if he liked it or not. So John gently inched his tongue further the more Fawnlock opened his mouth, until he was able to brush it against Fawnlock's.

The feel of John's tongue against his was completely new, and so it caused a small sound to escape. But soon he became used to the feeling, and yearned for more. Experimentally, Fawnlock moved his tongue in response to John's movements. Then a moan escaped him, hoping to convey just how much he was enjoying this new development.

Fawnlock's moan caused John to let out his own, and he moved one hand to the back of Fawnlock's head. There, he ran his fingers through Fawnlock's curls while also pulling him closer. He allowed himself to get lost in the moment, and simply let his tongue do all the work for now.

Why they hadn't done this sooner was unclear to Fawnlock, but he was certainly enjoying it now. They remained in the same position for a while, kissing and exploring. Though, it wasn't before long until Fawnlock's arms began to tire. So instead of hovering above John, Fawnlock readjusted himself so that his knees were on either side of him. He placed his hands onto John's face and lowered himself onto his lap, their sensitive flesh touching.

John had to pull out of the kiss to gasp at the sudden contact, before he melted back into the bliss. He couldn't help but buck his hips upwards again, searching for more friction. He honestly hadn't expected his refractory period to be his short. God.

When John broke the kiss Fawnlock was a bit disappointed, but he understood his reasons. Fawnlock felt John move his hips, which encouraged him to do the same. The pleasure went through him like a bolt of lightning. Once he gave a few slow thrusts he leaned down to capture John's lips once more.

There was no reason for John to have this big a libido at his age. Maybe if he was nineteen, sure, but not now. Not like this. But there he was, hard and ready to go again, and kissing Fawnlock as if his life depended on it. And God was it amazing, utterly, unbelievably amazing. He craned his neck to get a better access to Fawnlock's lips as he let his other hand slide down to their pricks. He only brushed his fingers over the shafts, but it was enough to get the shivers starting again.

The moment John touched them Fawnlock gave out another groan. He was learning so much from John and their entire experience. He didn't know what else to do with it other than to continue to use it in this moment to the best of his ability. Fawnlock desired nothing more than to seek out more pleasure for John and himself. He did so by running a hand through John's hair, and brushing his tongue against John's lips.

Once John could feel Fawnlock's tongue on him again, he opened his mouth further, inviting him in. The hand in his hair did nothing to ease the shivers, which was probably why it was so easy for him to go from light touches to taking them both in his hand and start pumping. He groaned as he worked, his own hand in Fawnlock's hair gripping at it as he felt a new wave of pleasure run through him.

It was Fawnlock's turn to explore John's mouth, and he did so with enthusiasm. Especially since John had taken them both into his hand. Fawnlock couldn't help but roll his hips as John began to work his hand. Oh. It felt so overwhelmingly good.

John swirled his tongue over Fawnlock's, amazed by just how stimulating it was. The pumping certainly helped, but John was sure that the tongues were a contributing factor. He noted Fawnlock moving about, and suddenly John was gripped with desire. He wanted more than just this. He wanted so much more. He wanted-- "Hahh...!" He released Fawnlock's mouth once again. "I want you."

Once again, Fawnlock felt deprived of John's mouth, but the feeling died as soon as John spoke. "Oh yes." He breathed in response. "Tell me, how you want me."

Oh God. "Anyhow," John replied without thinking. "On your back, on your knees, on top of me, against a wall, on the floor; I don't care - I just want you."

Fawnlock smiled and bent down to kiss John again. He gave a short but passionate kiss to express his own desperation. When he lifted up from John, he looked him right in the eyes. "Then claim me."

A fresh, pleasant wave coursed through John, and he grinned up at his mate. He released Fawnlock's hair and sat them both up and adjusted their position, so that they were lying correctly on the bed. Before he fully lay back down, though, John reached over to the nightstand and reached for the supplies, quickly throwing the box on the bed as he handled the bottle. He was somehow able to use his non-dominant hand to get it working, and squeezed a generous amount of the substance onto his fingers before looking up at Fawnlock again. "Move a bit closer so I can reach you," he said huskily.

Once Fawnlock heard John command him in such a way, he simply couldn't refuse. Again, he placed his knees on either side of John; except he was within John's reach. Fawnlock smoothed his hands over John's chest and smiled a bit. "Like this?" He asked.

"Yes," John replied, a bit disappointed that he had lost his grip on them, but he was still holding Fawnlock, so there was at least that. He reached over and prepared to start, pausing only because, embarrassingly, he couldn't find the spot. Only a whole bunch of fur, which-- Oh, crap. John looked up at Fawnlock, pursing his lips. "Um... d'you mind moving that?" he asked, referring to the tail that was blocking his way.

A rush of heat rose to Fawnlock's face. "Sorry, I guess I'm still... nervous." He said before complying.

Well, this was certainly something John could cross out of the list of things he thought he'd never experience; a damn tail getting in his way. Focus. "It's okay," he said as he brushed one finger over the hole. "Just relax."

As soon as Fawnlock felt John touch him, he felt a thousand chills travel across his back. Still, he took in steady breaths and tried to follow John's instruction. After all, John was his mate and he trusted him. Fawnlock gave John a slight nod when he believed he had a handle on things.

Once he felt that Fawnlock was relaxed enough, he took the nod as a sign to move further. So, with his coated finger, he slowly pushed in, but only just.

Instinctively, Fawnlock felt his body try to clench around the intrusion. But Fawnlock willed for it to let go just as fast while he deepened his breathing.

John inched his finger just a bit further inside, and then stilled it, waiting for Fawnlock to adjust before he did anything else. As a way of both soothing him and distracting him, John began doing light strokes on his prick to hopefully make up for the possible pain.

The moment John placed a hand on his makila, Fawnlock felt more relaxed. It was amazing for Fawnlock to realise that not only was John around him, but he was going to be inside of him. A part of his mate was inside of him. The thought alone sent a wave of pleasure through him.

Thankful that both his motions had worked, John set out to do a bit more, and began lightly but steadily moving his finger in and out to plant the idea. Not to be especially pleasurable, but more for adjustment purposes. He moved his other hand in rhythm with his finger, knowing that the pleasing distraction was working.

Fawnlock was in awe with how little movement made such a tremendous difference. He felt more of his body open up for John as he moved his finger. And the dueling sensation caused him to feel particularly good.

John could feel Fawnlock loosen up, which was somehow both relieving and ridiculously arousing. He continued the small motion for some time, until he was certain that Fawnlock was ready for more. He slowly pulled the finger out, and then let another join it before prodding again, this time paying mind to the muscle that he was stretching, so that it wouldn't tear. John also inwardly thanked the lube for not having dried up on his other fingers yet, but quickly shook it off to focus on the task at hand. Literally.

When Fawnlock felt John enter him a second time, he felt more prepared. In fact, it felt more pleasurable this time around. Fawnlock wasn't sure how that was possible, but it was. He was sure a part of it had something to do with John's hand on his makila, but he wasn't too focused on it now. Fawnlock decided to let out a small pleasurable sigh to let John know he was pleasing him.

Fawnlock's sigh made John let out his own breath as well, as well as push further, though still ever careful. As his fingers sank further inside, no matter how slowly, he instinctively began searching for a prostate. A part of John wanted to remind him that Fawnlock was part deer spirit, but another part of him also pointed out that he was humanised, and that his anatomy had been ridiculously human so far. So why shouldn't John search for it? With each movement, John paid mind to give Fawnlock a few soothing strokes, both to make him relax for more future insertion, and to stimulate him more.

As John pushed further, Fawnlock didn't feel as though he had to make much of an effort to relax anymore. The pain was ebbing more and more into pleasure. It was almost as if John's fingers were enchanted. Then, Fawnlock felt John's fingers begin to move with more purpose. He wasn't sure what for, exactly, but he appreciated it nonetheless. Without warning, a huge wave of pleasure shook Fawnlock to his core. "Aah!" Fawnlock moaned with a shudder.

And there it was. John made an effort to be careful, as he knew that too much brushing against the spot could potentially hurt because of how sensitive it was. But he still kept his fingers in place, lightly nudging at the prostate while also stretching Fawnlock a bit more. He let go of Fawnlock's prick for the moment and pushed himself up to a sitting position, putting his now free hand to the small of Fawnlock's back to bring him closer. John nuzzled Fawnlock's furry but firm chest, trailing kisses along it as he kept going, hoping to get to hear another pleasurable moan to know he was doing things right.

The small and tender kisses filled Fawnlock with warmth he had never felt before. He placed a hand on the crown of John's head, encouraging him to continue to stay there. Fawnlock felt nothing but pleasure in every corner of his being. Even without the stimulation he had felt on his makila. Each time John brushed against the muscles inside of him, Fawnlock felt chills run up and down his spine. "Oh, John." He breathed.

John had always taken pride at being exceptionally considerate when it came to something like this, and so he was thankful to find that Fawnlock thought so too. If his motions and sounds were anything to go by. So John kept at it, encouraged by Fawnlock's pleasurable breathing and the hand on his head. In and out his fingers went, stroking at every possible spot that could potentially be good for Fawnlock, and John was rewarded with a moan each time. Eventually, he felt Fawnlock loosen up even more, but because he didn't want to push things - especially since this was Fawnlock's first time - he decided to wait for a cue for more.

Now that John was moving in and out of him in a languid manner, Fawnlock had the sudden desire to feel more. "Ah, yes... More, John."

A plea. And honest to God plea. John couldn't ignore that, even if he wasn't entirely certain Fawnlock could handle three just yet. But as it was, Fawnlock probably knew his body better, so John complied. Like before, he pulled out to add the third finger, but instead of diving in right away, he let each of them slide in one by one until Fawnlock was filled. With his other hand, John caressed Fawnlock's back and continued to kiss and nuzzle his chest. "You can talk to me, you know," he then said in a hushed voice. "Tell me what feels good. What you want. Anything, and I'll try to give it to you."

"I know," Fawnlock managed to breathe while getting used to the feeling of being stretched. "I am just, overwhelmed." He explained, unsure how else to word it. Fawnlock was indulging in every feeling and sensation that John was giving him. So he felt as though he could hardly articulate anything. But he still tried when he placed his hand on John's face, and looked directly at him. "J- John, I want you."

John swallowed, the sound of Fawnlock's voice saying something like that travelling straight to his groin. "Yes," he breathed as he lightly hooked his fingers. "Okay. You sure you're ready?"

The slight motion managed to draw out a slight wavering moan from Fawnlock. "Ooh, yes." He answered.

 _Oh God_. John nodded, and then slowly retracted his fingers while planting a last, lingering kiss on Fawnlock's chest. "Alright. Then I just need to get one last thing..." he said before reaching for the box that had miraculously stayed on the bed this entire time. He opened it and pulled out one wrapper, duly noting the curious expression on Fawnlock's face. John somehow managed to blush because of it. "It's for protection..."

Fawnlock tilted his head slightly as he grew more confused by John's statement. "How do you mean?" He asked simply.

"Prevents spreads of diseases," John heard himself say before he could think of a more suitable answer. "And it's... cleaner. I guess. Less to worry about."

Still not quite understanding the concept, Fawnlock raised a final question that he had in his mind. "And, how does it work?"

Oh, of course. John mentally kicked himself for having forgotten that he wasn't simply dealing with a first-timer here, but a sodding forest spirit. Of course he wouldn't know. "Here, I'll show you," he said as he moved over a bit so that his own prick was visible. He opened the wrapper and presented the condom to Fawnlock before rolling it on, thankful that it covered everything.

Fawnlock moved to observe John curiously. Once the protection was applied, he was fascinated and intrigued. Fawnlock wondered if what John had done was some form of inukom magic that he hadn't known he possessed. "Brilliant." He said as he smiled to himself.

John bit back his reply of 'it's really not', and instead looked up at Fawnlock as he took the bottle in his hand again. "Now it's all up to you, I think," he said, still blushing slightly. "The, uh... the insertion... How you want it, that is."

The flame that had been temporarily lost ignited in Fawnlock's belly once more. He only placed his hands on either side of John to capture his lips again. The kiss was tender, yet full of underlining passion. Once he let go he looked into John's eyes. "Just like this, for now." He said in a hush voice, before trailing a few kisses close to John's ear. "And then, I want you to take me from behind."

There was no stopping the low groan that escaped from John's mouth at that, and he nodded hastily. "O- okay," he breathed, automatically craning his neck to give Fawnlock more spots to kiss, even though he knew he would be done soon. "On one condition, though," he added as he reached for the lube again. "We have to face each other at some point. With you on your back."

"Yes, yes of course." Fawnlock agreed just before he began to nip at John's neck again.

John instantly grasped Fawnlock's sides and let out a shaky breath. Apparently his neck was an extremely sensitive spot, which was something he had missed in all his years. The fact that Fawnlock was the one to bring it to his attention made him squirm and moan lightly, and his grasp tightened. "Please, Fawnlock," he groaned, "I need you."

The moment Fawnlock heard John's plea, he was more than willing to comply. He gave John a slight kiss on his lips, and adjusted himself properly over John's writhing frame. "And I, you."

The grip on Fawnlock's sides tightened as he positioned himself, and John's eyes widened. "Wait, wait," he said as he tried to keep Fawnlock still with one hand, while reaching for the bottle with the other. "We'll need this. Trust me."

Fawnlock flicked his ears in frustration and confusion. John presented the same substance he used earlier on his fingers, but he had no idea why it was so important. "Why? What's it for?" He asked.

"It may come as a surprise to you, but the area I've preparing for you isn't exactly known to produce its own lubricant," John said plainly. "Meaning, that unless we use as much of this as we can," he said as he poured some of the lube into his hand, "it's going to hurt you. And I for one don't want that."

Once John explained, Fawnlock had a better understanding of what John was doing. "I see... Your kind is so fascinating. Is there anything you haven't thought of?" He smiled.

"Loads," John replied with his own smile, spreading the lube from his hand over his prick, and then adding a bit more just for good measure. He shivered a bit under his own touch, but still kept eye contact with Fawnlock. "But I think we're pretty much covered in this department. So if you feel prepared enough, then... fire away."

"Yes, alright." Finally. The moment they both had been leading up to was finally here. Feeling more than prepared enough, Fawnlock repositioned himself so that his waist was directly over John. He took in a few steady breaths just before lowering himself down onto John's makila. Because John had placed his fingers inside earlier, it gave Fawnlock a sense of familiarity. And yet, it was entirely different. Fawnlock didn't know how to process what he was feeling other than to give out a few low groans.

The moment Fawnlock sunk himself onto him; John couldn't help but throw his head back and let out a low groan as well. He had had an idea what was coming, but even his excessive fingering had done nothing to prepare him for the tight heat he was feeling around him now. Fawnlock's groans even managed to make him harden even more, and his hands rose up to grab at his mate's hips again. Finally, he looked back up at Fawnlock, taking in the insanely arousing sight before speaking. "Y- you okay?"

"Ye- yes. Oh gods," Fawnlock responded, breathless. He was completely overwhelmed by the sensation of his mate inside of him; so he didn't want to move quite yet. Instead, he lingered just until the initial pain ebbed away. Experimentally, Fawnlock lifted his hips and let out a sharp gasp at the feeling, followed by a moan.

It was such a small movement, but it still sent a wave of pleasure through John's entire body, and he moaned as well, his hold on Fawnlock's hips tightening. He held back his desire to thrust upwards, as he knew that Fawnlock would have to set the pace first. It was unexpectedly torturous.

Trembling hands anchored themselves on John's legs while Fawnlock caught his breath. As soon as Fawnlock felt he was ready, he moved his hips in a slow and shallow motion.

God, the heat. And the tightness. While Fawnlock slowly moved, John was having trouble stifling his groans. Because holy hell, this felt far better than it should have. John almost began to dread the part where they would be able to do things more carnal. For the moment, he settled with moaning lowly in appreciation, keeping his hands in place simply because he needed to hold something.

Though each of his movements was small, they were electric. Fawnlock felt nothing but pleasure in every corner of his being. Hearing John giving out sounds encouraged him to do the same. It also gave him the confidence to draw out his motions, but still being careful not to allow John leave him. "Oh yes, John," He groaned out.

They had barely properly started and John was already feeling far too much pleasure for his own good. Fawnlock's slow but steady movements made John squirm and gasp, and eventually he couldn't take any more waiting. Though he kept himself grounded for the most part, John began rotating his hips in time with Fawnlock's motions. "Hahh, yes, God..."

When John began to move, it felt as though a weight had been lifted from him. He felt a deeper pleasure blooming from inside him. For a moment, it was so astounding Fawnlock closed his eyes just to focus on the feeling of his mate inside of him. He instinctively arched his back in hopes to feel more pleasure. There was no holding back any sound for Fawnlock as the moans continued to fall from his lips.

John couldn't help but join in, and soon the two of them were groaning in harmony, the sensation apparently too much for them both. Ever so slightly, John began pushing upwards, but found it almost unnecessary as Fawnlock continued to move. John threw his head back again, arching his back a bit, and breathed heavily. "God, Fawnlock... You- you're amazing."

The moment he heard that, Fawnlock looked back down at John. How he hadn't been able to keep his concentrated gaze on John was beyond him. Fawnlock observed just how wanting and glorious his mate looked. He released his grip on John's legs in order to lean down and kiss him passionately. Once he lifted his lips from John's mouth he breathed, "And you, are magnificent."

Finally, John willed himself to have a good look at Fawnlock's face, and he wondered what had given him the right to look this glorious when completely debauched. John moved his hands from Fawnlock's hips up to his back, grasping at the fur as well as the skin. "You... Oh God, you feel incredible," he then groaned, keeping up with his own movements.

Oh how Fawnlock loved to hear that. He felt more enthusiastic about this than ever before. "I love... you inside of me. I- oh, John it feels so good." Fawnlock admitted.

"It's- it's- Fuck!" The last word - though perhaps a more appropriate description would have been a grunt - was accompanied by a thrust, one that went deeper than before. John almost regretted it, but the feeling of being so far in made him tremble and gasp. "Goood..." he then drawled.

Because Fawnlock didn't know half of what John was saying, he assumed they were mostly noises. This encouraged him to continue on his steady pace. "Oh John, you were made for this... you were made f- for me." He breathed.

"I could say the- the same thing about- you," John replied, now actually pushing upwards in time with Fawnlock's movements. This all felt so much better than he had expected, but he was in no position to comment on that. So instead he kept going, trying to find a good rhythm for the two of them.

The pace was set, and the pleasure was bubbling up inside of him. Fawnlock listened as they filled the room with the noises lifting from their lips. He felt John's chest heaving, and his fingers clenching against his back. And yet, despite all of his growing desire, Fawnlock was finding that he was too overwhelmed to continue like this. "J- John, we should- move," he tried to articulate.

Move? Now? After finally finding a good pace? John almost shouted no right away, but stopped himself from doing so when he saw how Fawnlock looked. He swallowed, and gradually came to a stop, though still tightly grasping at Fawnlock's back. He then slowly sat up, still inside Fawnlock, and buried his face in his chest again. "Yes. Yes, you're right," he said as he deeply breathed in Fawnlock's scent. Damn.

Fawnlock was trembling until John sat up. With their bodies as one, it was easy to assume such a position. Even though Fawnlock wasn't sure they'd remain together like this, he tried to remain as close as possible. He ran his hands along John's sides; as Fawnlock didn't want to lose this feeling quite yet. With nowhere else for his mouth to reach he teased the edge of John's ear.

At this point, John was starting to wonder if something was wrong with him, because every touch, every single motion, no matter how small, made his entire being shiver in excitement. He would have blamed this sudden heightening  of his senses on his arousal, but something told him that it had everything to do with it being Fawnlock. He could barely keep himself still when he felt warm lips on his ear, and unintentionally started squirming a bit, rolling his hips again. "Please, Fawnlock," he all but whined when it became too much.

A shudder and a small, breathless moan rose up in Fawnlock at the sound of John's plea. It felt good to hear it, and yet somehow it simultaneously felt backwards. He kissed the side of John's head as a slight apology, just before beginning to lift himself off of John's lap. Instantly, he felt himself missing John's makila. He climbed off of John completely, but lingered to kiss him fiercely on the lips.

John was finally able to release Fawnlock's back, only to grab at his head to pull him deeper into the kiss. God it was so sloppy and desperate and nothing that the word 'kiss' even stood for. And yet John couldn't imagine stopping it. He had to eventually, though, and when he did, he gently bit Fawnlock's lower lip before releasing it and then flicking his tongue over it. "I don't want to lose the chance to look at your face," he then breathed, running his fingers into Fawnlock's hair, "but you said you wanted to be taken from behind. So to do that, you need to get on your knees now."

The command sent shivers down Fawnlock's spine. "Yes," he replied, as he pulled away from John's grasp and gave him a small nod. Fawnlock followed John's exact instruction and placed himself on all fours, facing the headboard of the bed. He looked back at John as he presented himself; his tail lifted and his legs slightly spread.

To see Fawnlock comply so willingly aroused John to no end. As if he wasn't already. He got up to his own knees and positioned himself behind Fawnlock, trying to bite back his inner chanting of 'oh God, oh God, oh God, oh God!' He put one hand on Fawnlock's hip while his other moved his prick into position. He gently pushed against the hole before running his hands up and down Fawnlock's thighs, taking in the fact that his mate wanted him so damn much. As he inched further in, he reminded himself that the feeling was completely mutual. To emphasise that, he leaned forward to get as close to Fawnlock's back as he could, his hands trailing up his sides.

It was easier for John to enter Fawnlock this time, as he already knew what to expect. However, this didn't diminish the immense pleasure he felt as it happened. Every touch John gave him made his skin prickle, and his fur stand on end. Fawnlock couldn't help but groan until John was finally buried inside. And when John lowered himself onto his back, he felt that much closer to John. "Oh, John."

Once John was inside, he lingered for a moment just to get used to the warmth, not just from the obvious place, but also just from being this close to Fawnlock. He ran his hands up Fawnlock's sides a bit and then wrapped them around him for a split second before letwting go due to the slightly contorted position. He planted a small kiss onto Fawnlock's back, and breathed, "gorgeous..." just as he eased himself out a bit.

Fawnlock didn't know what to say to that. In fact, he felt as though he could hardly say much of anything. Not while John was moving inside of him. All he could think about was each of John's deliberate movements and touches. Fawnlock gave out a few breathless moans, and gripped the sheets beneath him.

John rose up to his knees again, his hands now firmly placed on Fawnlock's hips for support. He gradually moved in and out, always going a bit further so that his thrusts wouldn't be so shallow and short. As he did this, he looked down on Fawnlock, loving the fact that he was still able to make him feel good. It was all happening so naturally; John wasn't even bothered by the bloody tail anymore. Finally, Fawnlock had adjusted properly again, and so John dared to thrust into him with a bit more enthusiasm than before.

At this angle, Fawnlock was able to relax even more. When John picked up the pace he couldn't help the small noises coming from his mouth. Especially since his thrusts were longer and more precise. This was exactly how Fawnlock had wanted it, and he felt fortunate to be pleased in such a way. It was simply, "i- incredible," he breathed.

It was at this point that John came to the realisation that he really, really enjoyed hearing Fawnlock make those pleasurable sounds. So to try and incite more of them, he shifted the angle slightly and changed his pace.

The moment John changed the timing of his thrusts; Fawnlock began to understand what John wanted from him. He also couldn't help but feel as though John was searching for the same sweet spot that he had found earlier. It was here Fawnlock was absolutely certain that there was no one in all the realms he would rather be with. John was so kind, passionate and loving. Any previous thoughts were whited out in Fawnlock's mind as he felt a crashing wave of pleasure consume him. He couldn't help but toss his head back and let out a large cry.

Found it. John would have paid more attention to what he was doing, had Fawnlock not made that wonderful sound. So instead, he kept his motions steady, while letting out his own groans as well. Every single part of his being was practically desperate for this to be good for his mate, so to hear Fawnlock appreciate it this much was almost overwhelming. John's fingernails dug into Fawnlock's skin once more as he refocused on pleasuring him, sliding in and out a bit faster with each move, trying to hit that same spot again.

The faster John went, the more Fawnlock found he was enjoying himself. And though he continued to make the unintelligible sounds he knew John wanted, he desired to communicate at least a little of what he was feeling. But it was hard to express himself under such circumstances. Especially when he felt John hit that one place again. "Ah! Oh yes, there, John." He managed to bite out.

That did it for John. Fawnlock's cries and moans encouraged him to thrust even faster and more vigorously, and while something in the back of his mind wanted to yell at him to be careful not to hurt Fawnlock, his primal instincts ignored it in favour of feeling good. His own skin began to slap against Fawnlock's cheeks, and his grip on Fawnlock's hips tightened even more. "God, Fawnlock, you're- unbelievable," he groaned, his mind going blank from the sheer pleasure of it all.

Fawnlock could sense that John was giving into his deeper, internal urges. And it gave him no greater joy to know that he was the initial cause. He could tell from the way John held him, and the newfound enthusiasm in his movements. "Ooh, John. You- you feel so good."

"Speak for your- self-- hahh!" John barely managed through his moans as he quickened the pace even more. Though his fingernails were still dug into Fawnlock's skin, he trailed them down to his bottom and squeezed it, spreading it further as he let himself go completely.

"Ah! Yes, John. Feel me, take me; I am- yours, John." Fawnlock breathed. He allowed John to have this moment, if only because it felt so good-- so right.

John so desperately wanted to reach around and stroke Fawnlock just for that, but feared that if he moved just an inch wrong, he would lose everything they had build up so far. So instead, he slowed his motions by just a fraction, and loosened his grip a bit. "Touch yourself," he groaned, his voice low and husky.

At John's command, Fawnlock took his hand and wrapped it around his makila. It took him only but a moment to set the same pace as John's thrusts. Fawnlock was sure he had felt no greater pleasure once he did so.

As soon as John was aware of the fact that Fawnlock had moved, he suddenly felt immense desire to be the one to do it. Especially when Fawnlock began panting in time with his groans, much more erratically than before. For the moment, though, John simply continued, not wanting to stop now that they both felt so bloody good. The least he could do was go on for a few moments before changing positions again.

The pleasure that coursed through Fawnlock was beginning to feel familiar. Especially with his own hand around him. After a few more powerful thrusts, Fawnlock's arm began to tremble. He wasn't entirely sure how long he would be able to continue like this.

Okay, that was it. John simply had to change up a bit. With one last thrust he came to a halt, but because he was still inside Fawnlock, he rolled his hips a bit to give him some movement. John then leaned forward as far as he could, and kissed Fawnlock's back. "I want you on your back," he said, a hint of command in his voice.

Upon hearing John speak, a new wave of arousal swept through Fawnlock. He was both grateful and excited to change position. "Yes," Fawnlock breathed with a small shudder.

With that, John slowly eased out and patted Fawnlock's behind to give him a cue to move. He watched as his mate turned over and lay down, propping himself up on his elbows. John could hardly believe the amount of arousal he felt at just seeing Fawnlock's face again, and so immediately plunged forward to lock him in a messy kiss, knocking Fawnlock down on his back. All rational thought was completely gone, and the need for more rutting and the inevitable release increased.

Fawnlock's hands wrapped around John the moment their lips met. He found it incredible that they had hardly spoken a word, and yet they both still gravitated towards one another with passion. Without a single hesitation Fawnlock kissed back just as fiercely. But after a few moments, he felt his need grow stronger. This was highly evident in the way Fawnlock kissed, squirmed and moaned.

Despite the growing intensity, John managed to chuckle a bit through the kiss before pulling back to look at Fawnlock. While he was no expert, and certainly couldn't sense nearly as much as Fawnlock could, he could see the desperation and need in Fawnlock's eyes and the way his body moved. "I think it's about time for the last round," he said with a grin as he positioned himself once again and pushed in.

As soon as John positioned himself, Fawnlock spread his legs in eagerness. His fingers curled across John's back as he felt his mate sink into him. Fawnlock gave out a few low groans in appreciation. "Oh, John."

Initially, John had wanted to stay upright so he could do things properly, but now he was reconsidering it. He loved the closeness, and he didn't want to lose Fawnlock's grip on him, so he stayed as he was, leaning over his mate while simultaneously thrusting into him. As he continued, John began kissing Fawnlock's neck for good measure. "God, Fawnlock," he managed between kisses, "you're magnificent. Truly, utterly, completely, amazing."

A small breathless moan escaped Fawnlock each time John planted another kiss. He rolled his hips in unison with John as he thrusted. One of Fawnlock's hands nestled inside John's hair to encourage him. He was so lost in his state of arousal; he had hardly any idea of what to say. How could he begin to describe the single greatest thing in his entire life? "J- John, I love you."

All things considered, the phrase shouldn't have had such an effect on John, especially given the circumstances. And yet, even in a state of complete arousal, the words made him feel incredibly warm and full of joy. He released Fawnlock's neck in favour of replying, "And I love you, Fawnlock. So much," before kissing him passionately; nothing like the slobbery mess they had just finished.

The action of John's powerful kiss only emphasized the words and their meaning. Fawnlock was so incredibly happy, he felt as though he would burst. He enjoyed each moment of their shared kiss until it became too much. Fawnlock had to let go, if only to catch his breath. He held onto John tightly as he continued to thrust into him. Even with his makila trapped between them, Fawnlock still found a great pleasure building from inside him.

When Fawnlock let go of the kiss, John wanted to push himself upwards in order to give Fawnlock the most pleasure he could, but found that he was being held so tightly he couldn't. He thus settled with continuing as before, only this time, he gently ran one hand down Fawnlock's chest. How he was still able to be this delicate at this point, he had no idea, but he managed to somehow.

As John trailed a hand over him, Fawnlock couldn't help but arch into the slight touch. Even with all this excitement, Fawnlock knew something was missing. He brought a shaking hand to John's face, and brought his attention to him. "J- John, when you- when you feel it... I need you, to claim me." He breathed.

John almost froze and stopped entirely, but thankfully had a mind to keep going despite his surprise. His eyes widened, and he stared for a moment before he said anything. "Claim... Wha- You mean, you want me to- bite you?"

Fawnlock realised he probably could have picked a better time to discuss his natural instincts when it came to bonding rituals, but it was too late for that now. "Y- yes, please," He begged, unsure if he was talking about the bite or the fact that John had slowed his movements. "J- just this once. Before- it happens. It- will seal our bond."

"Okay. Okay, I will," John quickly replied, only having a vague idea of what 'it' was. Regaining his focus, he went back to his previous activity, rising up slightly so that his hand would have more room to trace Fawnlock's body. Eventually, he came in contact with Fawnlock's prick, and not wasting any time, wrapped his hand around it and began stroking him.

The moment John touched Fawnlock, he let in a shaking breath and threw his head back slightly. "Oh, John." Fawnlock groaned. He placed his hand back into John's hair, and tightened his hold on John's back as best as he could.

Gradually, John was becoming the one with the ragged breathing, if only because his movements were becoming faster and more desperate with each passing second. He could feel the pressure begin to bubble inside him, and because he knew it wouldn't be long, he instantly bent down towards Fawnlock's neck again. Normally, he probably would have been worried about doing things correctly, but now he couldn't care less. Without further ado, he sunk his teeth into the skin.

Once Fawnlock felt the bite, he gave out a large cry. There were simply too many sensations to hold at once, and yet Fawnlock felt it all. Though the wave of pleasure was familiar; it was intensified by another force. Fawnlock had paid no mind to the building aura around them until he felt his release. There was no possible way to describe what it felt like as he and John became one.

John hadn't even noticed the aura until he began to feel Fawnlock tighten around him. Once it was brought to his attention, it was only a couple of seconds before he felt Fawnlock spill over his fingers. That alone did it for him.

For a moment, his bite hardened, until he had to let go to let out one last groan as he burst inside Fawnlock. John wasn't one to call things 'mind-blowingly amazing' in any way, but this certainly qualified. He rode out his orgasm until he was completely spent, and even then he still felt waves of pleasure coursing through his nerves.

Fawnlock shook and moaned as John arrived to the peak of his pleasure. He panted heavily as he caught his breath, and continued to hold his mate inside him until he was through. Once Fawnlock felt a contentedness spread throughout him, he had no doubt that his magic had an influence on their bond. He refocused his eyes to John's and simply smiled as he watched John glow like himself.

John stayed inside Fawnlock, if only because he was still shaking slightly from his orgasm. Quickly, though, it became uncomfortable, so he slowly eased out, now extremely careful, and took the condom off, throwing it away behind his back. He didn't move from where he was, though, and still hovered over Fawnlock as he steadied his breathing. John looked at his mate, so unbelievably happy that he felt like it was radiating off him. Except--

"Whoa," he breathed when he noticed that some of the aura from before was now on him as well. "Did- did you do this?" he asked, smiling down on Fawnlock.

"We did this," Fawnlock said with an even wider smile. Then, he leaned upwards and captured John's lips in a small kiss. Every touch was still incredibly euphoric, and the kiss was no different. He let go, knowing John would probably want a better explanation.

"What I mean to say is, this is what happens when we've bonded. Our souls become one."

John huffed a small laugh, and looked himself over some more. There was no mistake about it; this aura was exactly the same colour as Fawnlock's magic. Now there really was no doubt that they were mates. John sat up, examining himself with a look of wonder, curiosity and excitement on his face.

"I think I'm starting to understand why your kind call this whole thing 'bonding'," John said. "It's not just a euphemism, then. You literally bond."

"Yes, exactly. You are mine, and I am yours." Fawnlock told John while he sat up with him. He took John's hand into his as the light began to slowly fade.

Squeezing Fawnlock's hand, John's smile widened, and he even chuckled a bit. "That's brilliant," he said, very impressed with everything that had to do with this. "Is anything going to happen to me? Or was it just... you know, temporary?"

"No, it's not temporary at all." Fawnlock said with a smile as wide as John's, "You have a part of my soul now. It's a guarantee that you will possess some of my power." He explained.

John's jaw dropped. "Are you serious?" he said, the surprised look from before becoming more prominent. "As in, sensing more things and all that?"

"Yes," Fawnlock answered with a nod, adoring the look on John's face. "Magic comes from the soul. And now that you have mine, you will most-likely gain the fundamentals of my magic."

It was only at this point that John began to consider why he felt so unbelievably happy all of a sudden. Well, more than usual. "Wow," he breathed. "Think I'm already starting to sense a bit. From you." His smile softened, and he squeezed Fawnlock's hand again. "But honestly, will you ever not amaze me to the point where I'm completely stunned?"

At that, Fawnlock grinned once more. "I don't think so, and I certainly wouldn't bother to try." He said before he gave John another kiss.

John chuckled again, pulling back ever so slightly to reply. "For future reference, remind me that bonding makes you cheekier than you normally are," he said before resuming the kiss, bringing his free hand to the back of Fawnlock's head.

Fawnlock couldn't help but chuckle as well. He kissed back gently, and laced his fingers with John's. While they continued kissing, Fawnlock began to feel exhausted; despite the initial excitement that he and John felt.

Quickly, John noticed the way Fawnlock was slowing down, and so with a last lingering smooch, he pulled back, gently rubbing his fingertips against Fawnlock's scalp. "Feeling a bit tired?" he asked, although he didn't really have to, since he could both see it, and now sense it.

A smaller, softer smile appeared on Fawnlock's face as he nodded. "Yes..." He answered.

John smiled, and reached up to kiss Fawnlock's forehead. "Then I think some cuddles are in order," he said as he lay down on the bed, gesturing for Fawnlock to do the same.

Another chuckle escaped Fawnlock, just before he settled down next to John. He wrapped himself around John comfortably, and lent a small kiss to his cheek.

Settling into a comfortable position, John wrapped an arm around Fawnlock, while the other hand reached for one of Fawnlock's to hold again. He then turned his head to look at his mate. "By the way, I, uh... I wasn't too- rough, was I?" he asked, almost shyly.

Fawnlock looked at him, the smile never leaving his face. "Not at all. I enjoyed it." He told John before closing his eyes.

"Good," John said, his own smile returning from having been a bit worried for a moment. "I'm glad. And I enjoyed it too. Obviously," he added before planting a small kiss on Fawnlock's face. "Keep in mind though, it could hurt a bit tomorrow. But I'll be more than happy to give you a massage or something to make you feel better."

At that, Fawnlock gave John another kiss on his cheek. "Always so considerate." He commented.

"Of course," John responded. "And I take pride in it too, in case you haven't noticed. Have to take care of my mate the best I can, don't I?"

Fawnlock allowed the smile to widen on his face, and he felt himself fill up with joy. "Yes. And you do. So much. Which is exactly why I love you." He said as he slightly squeezed John's hand.

John smiled softly and turned towards Fawnlock, without making his position too contorted, and tightened his hold on him. The amount of happiness he could sense in the room was practically overwhelming, and he sighed contentedly. "I love you too," he said as he reveled in the warmth he felt emanating from his mate, which was something he hadn't really thought about before. Not this way. Because this was more than the usual heat he always felt when Fawnlock was near. This was pure, unconditional love, which had only been enhanced by their bond. And John absolutely adored it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaand the conclusion to the sex. Hope you all enjoyed it. Once again, we would love to hear from you guys! Thanks for reading. Until the next update!


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A thousand apologizes can't even begin to cover how deeply sorry I am for not updating this fic sooner. It's been completed for a long time. So I have no excuse. To make up for it, I'll be uploading the rest of its contents every day until it's finally finished. So enjoy!

John doesn't remember how he got into this situation, nor does he remember why. All he knows is that he has somehow found himself in the darker parts of the forest looking for something, and has been cornered by a beast of some sort. He can't see it clearly, but it's threatening him, glaring at him with bright, red eyes and bearing its teeth. He suddenly feels a hand tighten around his neck, making him gasp and cough. It's only then that he sees what it is that's attacking him.

"No," he manages between gasps. "He stopped you. He killed you!"

"Ah, but don't you know the golden rule of fairy tales, John?" Wolfiarty sings. "They all need a good old fashioned villain. And who would be better for that part than me?"

John has no idea how Wolfiarty knows about fairy tales or villains - or how either of them is speaking the other's language - but now isn't exactly the time to think about that. He struggles in Wolfiarty's grasp, trying desperately to get loose. It only makes the grip tighten, and soon John is finding it difficult to breathe.

"Oh, it's beautifully tragic, this," Wolfiarty continues, grinning wickedly. "But to be fair to myself, it's also brilliant. I always did plan to do this - it was part of my deal, remember? It's a shame your mate isn't here to see it. I bet he would have loooved to see the show!"

At that, John tries to cry out and struggles even more. Wolfiarty can't reach Fawnlock, he just can't. John won't allow it. And yet there's nothing he can do about it. And he hates it. He hates not being able to help. To save Fawnlock from whatever it is Wolfiarty plans to do with him.

"Look at you, being all loyal and stupid," Wolfiarty drawls, and John thinks he can see him roll his eyes a bit. "So pathetic. You know there's nothing you can do." His voice is starting to sound strange, unreal. Despite everything that's going on, John finds himself shaking. "It's funny, how you think you can make any kind of difference. You're nothing."

John tries to focus on the now blurry image in front of him, refusing to believe what he's looking at. The red aura around Wolfiarty is turning black, and his eyes are turning yellow. When he starts growing antlers, John once more begins gasping for breath, needing to get out of there. But it's too late. The wooden hand around his neck prevents any kind of movement, and John is stuck struggling for his life in the hands of his mate, who has succumbed to his demon desires.

"You are nothing, do you hear me?" the demon that was once Fawnlock growls. "You're a mistake. You’re a waste of space. There is nothing about you worth loving. You never should have treaded sacred grounds. You are weak, pathetic, and I wish we never met. This all happened because of you. I am like this because of you. It's your fault. Your fault, inukom scum!"

Even in his sleep, John felt like he was choking. His breaths came out in sharp gasps as if he was being strangled, and his hands were trying to get something off that wasn't there. He trembled and shook, whimpered and grunted, twisted and turned. His thrashing was so severe that any outside viewer would have assumed he was in some kind of considerable physical pain.

Being a naturally light sleeper, Fawnlock woke up instantly. He looked over John with worry and concern. It had been a long time since John had any nightmares. Still, he tried his best to remain as calm as possible; even though it was difficult seeing John in such a state. Fawnlock conjured up some of his magic and placed a calming hand on the side of John's face. The moment he closed his eyes, he caught a glimpse of John's dream. Terror filled every inch of his being, and so he recoiled. At the same time, Fawnlock knew something else was at work.

Something brightens the scene for a flicker of a second, and John desperately hopes that something is going to help him. Those hopes are shattered when he sees that the light flickers away, and he's back in the darkness. He is gradually losing energy, and he can feel certain parts of his body going limp. The demon seems to like that, because after expressing so much fury, it grins.

"Look at you..." it practically growls. "To think, you were stupid enough to be loyal to me. Did you honestly believe I could ever truly care for you? Me? Do you know who I am? What I represent? Even before you did this to me, you were worthless. A damaged piece of nothing!"

It was a wonder that John was even able to sleep through all this, especially considering his twitchy movements and ragged panting. And yet, no matter how much he wanted to, he couldn't wake up from this. So he kept twisting, gasping for air even though nothing was preventing him from breathing.

Even though he was afraid, Fawnlock couldn't sit back and watch John struggle like this. Especially not when some other force was causing it. This time Fawnlock placed both hands on either side of John's face and began to chant a soothing spell. He closed his eyes again; and though he was afraid, he tried to remain strong. To do this, he reflected on his deep love for John.

"I can't believe I was foolish enough to give you a chance," the demon continues, and John swears he can feel it crush something in his neck. "I should have killed you at the first opportunity. Then none of this would have happened. The forest would be safe from you, no laws would have been broken, and I would be where I belong, with my true mate. But now I can't. Because you made me a demon. I hope you're very proud of yourself, because I certainly won't give you the benefit of a quick and easy death."

John refuses to believe anything the demon is saying, and yet for some reason it strikes him. He suddenly finds himself seriously wondering if the forest and Fawnlock would have been better off without him. The demon senses it, apparently, because it grins wider.

"Ah, you see it too, don't you?" it taunts. "The world wouldn't have changed if you hadn't been here. You have contributed nothing; and the only thing you've brought is to make the prince of the forest a demon. You inukom are all the same. You think you're the only ones who can do anything of worth, when in reality all you do is make things worse."

Although John's breathing was slowing down a bit, it didn't look like he was calming down. If anything, he was growing more restless because of whatever he was dreaming. Subconsciously, one shaking hand came up to his face and grabbed Fawnlock's hand. A choked sob escaped him as he continued to whimper, as if begging for help.

Despite John's cries, Fawnlock focused his energy on trying to calm John down. When mostly everything proved to be futile, he found he had no choice but to enter further into John's dream.

Once he did, Fawnlock was horrified by what he saw. It not only made him afraid, but disgusted to see his mate twisting in the grip of his former self. "Release him." Fawnlock growled.

Both John and the demon instantly look up and in Fawnlock's direction. John allows himself to feel relieved, but only for a moment, as the sight of Fawnlock causes the demon's grip to tighten even more. Now John is certain that major damage has been done to him - he is genuinely surprised that he hasn't died yet.

The demon frowns at Fawnlock, and glares threateningly. "You have some kind of nerve coming here," it says with a small snarl. "Even for a disgusting inukom-lover like yourself, it's very risky."

"You hardly gave me any choice. Besides, you are the one using your magic on my mate." Fawnlock said lowly as he approached the demon. "I won't ask you again, so I suggest you release him now." He warned, feeling a deep anger rise up inside him.

"Or what?" the demon challenges. "There is only so much you can do here. And in case you haven't noticed, I am just one pinch away from squeezing the life out of your so-called mate."

Despite the pain and the continuing numbness in his body, John feels confused. Normally, if anything resembling Fawnlock shows up in these sort of otherworldly places, everything turns out alright. Why isn't it happening now? Why is the demon still here? And why does it feel like the numbness isn't just in this dark place anymore?

"Not if I have anything to say about it." Fawnlock replied right before tossing magic in the demon's direction.

The magic comes so unexpectedly that the demon is actually hit pretty badly. It somehow burns off some of the smaller roots and twigs surrounding the demon, and because of this, it jerks a bit before resuming its position. Breathing heavily, it continues glaring at Fawnlock, and without hesitation, it tightens its hold on John's throat.

"I've changed my mind, inukom," it says, keeping its eyes on Fawnlock. "I won't kill you today. Not entirely. But I'll leave my effect on you." With that, it digs its wooden claws into John's skin, causing him both to bleed, and to choke. The demon finally lets go of John, and he falls down to the ground, completely limp, and now unmoving. "Think of it as a small taste of what is to come."

The moment John collapsed in the dream, was when Fawnlock opened his eyes with a slight gasp. He didn't let go of John's face completely, hoping to comfort John with a few strokes across his cheek as he woke up. "Oh John..."

Although he didn't wake up with a start, John still felt like he had been shocked out of his nightmare and not woken naturally. He almost winced when he saw who was trying to comfort him, and let out a slight gasp. Desperate for more contact, he wanted to throw his arms around Fawnlock and hold him as tightly as he could, but soon found that he was too weak to make such an abrupt move. So he did it slowly instead.

Fawnlock looked into his eyes with a deep concern. He knew John was weak, so he continued to caress John. "Yes, I'm here. Don't move too much." He told him.

"God, F- Fawn..." John barely managed, his voice hoarse as if he had actually been strangled. "H- he was- back. And you. And I didn't- I couldn't--"

"Shh, it's alright John. Calm down. You were being attacked by a demon. I'm going to try to heal you." Fawnlock told John as he placed a healing hand on John's chest.

John closed his eyes again and let out a shaking sigh, putting one hand over Fawnlock's on his chest. He had never needed reassurance that his mate was there this much. "I know. That's- what I'm saying," he tried to say, though it was somewhat difficult to hear.

Fawnlock looked at him curiously, just before he was done healing his mate. At first he believed John to be delirious, but now that he was persistent Fawnlock wondered what he was talking about. "Wait, are you saying you... know the demon who attacked you?"

"Of course I did," John replied with a small nod, opening his eyes to look at Fawnlock just to make sure he was still there. "W- Wolfiarty, at first. Then you. And- God, Fawnlock, I couldn't- save you that time. Couldn't do anything. Nothing..."

When Fawnlock heard that he continued to run his hand gently across John's cheek. "John, it was only a nightmare. The demon caused you to dream the things he wanted you to see. I'm still here, and Wolfiarty is gone. I promise you."

While John knew that every bit of that was true, he was still out of it, especially since it had all felt so real. So without thinking, he blurted: "D'you think- you'd be better off without me?"

The words stung like thorns piercing Fawnlock's heart. He shook his head and replied instantly, "No, of course not. I'd be miserable, John. I love you. I love this life. I can't imagine anywhere else I'd rather be. Don't give any thought into what that demon said, do you understand?" He asked.

John had to take a moment to reflect on that, and on why he could feel that Fawnlock was telling the truth. Though why he still felt like he had just gotten into bed after being awake for two days was a mystery to him. He nodded slowly, and then thought back to what Fawnlock had just said, just now realising how it didn't make sense. "Hang on, how did you know about the demon?"

"Well I couldn't calm you down with any spell, so I knew something else had a hold on you. And then I went inside your dream to try and chase it out." Fawnlock told him as though it was the most natural thing in the world.

"What?" John instantly said, more confused than he should have been. "You can do that? And wha... Did it work? Is that why I woke up?"

"I wasn't powerful enough, but yes I can enter your dreams. I've done it before, or at least have had my influence. But you woke up because the demon allowed you to." Fawnlock explained.

That explained a lot, especially how John's nightmares usually got better when he felt Fawnlock's presence there. The latter part of Fawnlock's explanation made John shudder a bit. "So what you're saying is, this wasn't just any regular old nightmare," he said simply. "Something was actually in my bloody head."

Fawnlock nodded, "Yes. And it was powerful. But it wasn't Wolfiarty." He said confidently.

"Yeah. Yeah, I got that. Couldn't have been," John said, more to reassure himself than anything else. "Do you know what it was?" He paused. "And why I feel like I haven't slept for days?"

"You simply need food and rest, and you'll feel better." Fawnlock said with a small nod. "Now, I don't know who it was, or why it was attacking you; but I've heard of this happening before. Just as each kind of spirit protects their own portion of the forest, they have certain magic that reflects that. With each species comes a new set of custom, history and teaching. And there's only two I know of that have that ability, and only one thrives on it. Harina, and Jasan. A bear spirit."

Bears. How many different species of spirits were there? And of all things, sodding bears. "And are these... Jasan, demons altogether? Or just this one?" he asked.

"While Jasan aren't very kind to begin with, they are not all demons." Fawnlock told him, trying to fight a small smile from appearing on his face. "My guess is this one is acting on its own, and that it's incredibly angry."

"And of course I just happen to be in its way when it's raging all over the place, right?" John said, trying not to think about the possibility that he was being targeted.

Fawnlock didn't answer directly, but he still held John's face in his hands as he spoke. "I will protect you, John. With all of my power, I won't allow any harm to come to you." He promised.

Despite the somewhat fuzzy answer, John didn't question it. Although he could barely feel it, he knew that one of his hands was placed over Fawnlock's on his face, so he gave it a light squeeze, noting how weak he still was. "I know," he said simply. "And I'll... try my best to ward it off too. Not making any guarantees, though."

"I'll make a few precautions in the morning; things that will help protect us. But for now," Fawnlock said before gently placing his fingers in the middle of John's forehead. There was a slight light as he said a few words, and then took them away. "That should help, at least for tonight."

After everything that had gone on, John felt himself calm down immensely. It was as if his brain had been jittering for half an hour and that Fawnlock's touch had stilled it. He let out a sigh of relief, feeling more relaxed - though it may have had something to do with him still feeling exhausted after nothing. "Thank you," he breathed. "And sorry about the mess."

"Don't apologise, John. I am here to take care of you, and protect you. You are my mate, and I love you." Fawnlock told John, and then gave him a small kiss.

John kissed him back softly, and then had to pull back to take a breath. "I love you- too," he all but whispered. "Still wish- I could do more for you."

"You do, John. You do so much for me. More than you know." Fawnlock told John while he placed a gentle hand through John's hair. "Now, rest."

"Okay," John said with a weak chuckle. "Since you're so persistent. I'll try- not to release the bears again."

Fawnlock gave John a small smile as he continued to comb his hands through John's hair. "Shhh," he gently hushed.

Fawnlock's soothing motions calmed John down even further, and he was soon beginning to feel less weak and drowsier. Like before, he was aware of the sheer warmth and love between the two of them, which made it easier for him to dare to fall asleep again. In the back of his mind, though, he wondered if this could possibly be the first night of many. He chose to ignore that thought for now, and settled into deep sleep, thankful that Fawnlock was there to make sure things would be okay.

\--

When the morning came, Fawnlock awoke before John in order to assess his condition. He rose from the blankets and turned to John who was still in a more peaceful slumber. He vowed right then and there to find the demon that dared to attack his beloved. But before that, he needed to protect them from any further invasion. So without trying to wake John, Fawnlock slipped out of their bed and started for the door.

Despite Fawnlock's best efforts, John did end up stirring as he took his leave. John shivered, and even though he had slept relatively well, all things considered, his head was still pounding, and he felt nauseous. He curled a bit into himself and groaned, squeezing his eyes shut again. "I didn't sign up for a hangover..." he complained.

Fawnlock turned to John as soon as he spoke, and returned to his side. "What you're feeling is the effect that the demon had on you. They drained you of your energy. It's a powerful, dark magic." He explained, placing a soft hand on John's arm.

"Figures..." John groaned. "Energy drains. Would've expected to feel more... tired, I guess. Not like I downed an entire bottle of whisky last night."

Because Fawnlock was confused by what John was saying, he carried on talking. "I tried my best to heal you the other night. I wish I could have done more..."

That alone made John's heart sink, and he opened his eyes to look at Fawnlock. He could sense honest-to-God guilt coming from Fawnlock, and because of that, he wanted to fix it as soon as possible. So despite his state, he sat up in the bed (which turned out to be quite the task), and invited Fawnlock to embrace him. "Shut up and come here."

Fawnlock blinked at him a few times before he smiled softly and moved to hold him. He could tell John was weak, so he tried not to hold on to him too tightly. "I'm sorry, John. You asked if I were better off without you, but with everything that's happened I can't help but think that you're better off without me." He said sheepishly.

"I said shut up, Fawnlock," John said, his words slightly muffled due to the fact that he had buried his face in the crook of Fawnlock's neck. He tried desperately to tighten his hold, especially when he sensed the genuine sadness in Fawnlock, but his body wouldn't allow him.

"You're the greatest and best thing that's ever happened to me. I wouldn't trade you for anything. And if I have to endure bear attacks in my dreams to get to be with you, then that's exactly- what I'll do."

"Well you won't. Not if I can help it." Fawnlock told John as he pulled himself away from John's embrace. "I'm going into the forest. There I will find certain things that will help us keep the demon away. At least until we know exactly who we're up against."

 

John nodded, feeling like he couldn't stay upright now that Fawnlock wasn't holding him. "Okay. You do that, I'll stay here and... try and get back the energy I lost, I guess. Somehow," he said before sinking back down onto the bed and closing his eyes again. "Be careful."

Fawnlock leaned down to place a small kiss on John's forehead, "I will." He said softly. Then Fawnlock rose from the bed and walked out of the cottage, where he began to make his way into the forest.

\--

Not for the first time in her life, Vixene felt relieved that she was able to travel by tree, unlike most of the other spirits. It kept her safe from the major threats, and ensured that she was kept hidden and unseen whenever she wanted. Now, though, she wondered if that was enough, or if the jasan could find her either way. Bottom line, she had to find the rebel prince, and fast. She knew perfectly well that this was a long shot, but it was the most hope she had.

As Fawnlock ventured into the forest, he began to run down a mental list of what he needed. While he gathered these things, he was able to sense that something was amiss in the forest. There was a certain calmness to the forest; one that didn't settle right with Fawnlock. It felt empty and lifeless. That's when he knew he wasn't alone.

The scent gradually grew stronger the further Vixene went, and the more she smelled it, the more she decided she liked it. Vaguely native, but oh so sweet too. She followed it, jumping from tree to tree until she could feel it right below her. With a small grin, she slowly climbed down a few branches until she was just a few feet above the prince. " _We have to stop meeting like this_ ," she said simply.

Fawnlock jumped and turned towards the voice. Instantly, he recognised Vixene and gave out a sigh of relief. " _What are you doing here? I realise you're a vagabond, but this isn't exactly your part of the woods._ " He said with a suspicious gaze.

" _Nothing is really 'my part of the woods'_ ," Vixene said with a small shrug. " _But I do love to travel when given the chance. Which isn't exactly the reason I'm here, but certainly part of it. You should see me leap these trees; it's like a work of art_."

Even while he wasn't feeling on the edge like this, Fawnlock hated small talk. So he simply frowned. " _I don't have time for this. My mate needs my protection. I'll return your favour some other day. Now leave me alone._ " He said as he began to stalk off.

" _Oh, funny story, actually,_ " Vixene called after Fawnlock, " _I think your mate and I might be having similar bear problems. I've been hearing a lot from the jasan in question. He's pretty mad, to say the very least. Boy, is your mate in for a treat..._ "


	19. Chapter 19

At that, Fawnlock froze in his tracks and turned back towards Vixene. " _What do you mean? How could you possibly know about that?"_ He asked with a large frown.

Vixene's grin widened, and her eyes practically sparkled. Oh, how she loved to have Fawnlock's attention. " _I heard it from the demon himself, of course,_ " she replied. " _Seems to have quite a grudge against you._ "

The thought that Vixene knew about this demon made his fur stand on its end. " _Who is he? And exactly how did you hear about all this?_ "

" _His name is Boaran_ ," Vixene said as she slid down the tree a bit. " _And I didn't just hear about it; I experienced it. He's very cross, indeed_."

" _With you? Why?_ " Fawnlock asked, his initial anger diminishing.

" _Because I helped you,_ " Vixene said as if it was the most obvious thing. " _And in his mind, anyone who helps the rebel prince has to leave their bodies. Simple as that._ "

Fawnlock began to grow more frustrated and confused by the minute. " _I still don't understand. Why should this demon, Boaran, hold anything against me?_ " Right then something clicked inside Fawnlock's mind, " _Unless... it has something to do with Wolfiarty._ "

" _Now you're getting somewhere,_ " Vixene said, looking almost proud. " _And you know what the funniest thing is? It has everything to do with Wolfiarty. I mean, really. You know how demons work. The one thing that makes them is hate and anger. So how do you make a demon even more powerful? Fuel it with more hate and anger._ "

The confusion Fawnlock felt dissipated and morphed into fearfulness. He swallowed nervously, his thoughts only going towards John and how he had left him behind, defenseless and weak. " _And now he's after you. So your favour is protection?_ " He asked.

" _Yes,_ " Vixene replied. " _And, if possible, some assistance in getting rid of him. I'd hate to have him in my head for the rest of my apparently short life._ "

Fawnlock nodded, " _Alright then. We'll head back to the cottage. I've gathered a few things that will protect us for the moment. Or at least until we can figure out how to get rid of him. Follow me._ " He said before leading the way.

\--

John didn't even remember falling asleep until he jerked awake. But even then, it wouldn't have made any difference, because he still felt utterly exhausted. Unlike the night before, he couldn't remember what he had dreamed, but now knew for a fact that the bear spirit had had something to do with it. It had to be the reason why he felt so drained and lifeless. Not to mention alone. He wanted to switch positions, sit up, curl a bit into himself, but could only lay still, drenched with sweat and panting hard.

Even when Fawnlock was outside the cottage, he could sense something wasn't right. Fighting his instinct to barge in, he carefully placed everything he had gathered in the forest around their home. Fawnlock placed as many protective spells as he could think of around the area. By the time he was finished he was worn out. Still, he went inside with only John on his mind.

Instantly, Fawnlock raced to John's side; knowing something was incredibly wrong. He could tell that John was even weaker than before. "He attacked again, didn't he?" He asked right away.

With a slow, small nod, John replied: "'E did. I... fell- asleep. Didn't think... Sorry."

"Sorry? Don't be sorry. I- I should be the one apologising. I left you here, alone..." Fawnlock said as he grabbed a hold of John's hand.

Oh how John wished he could hold Fawnlock's hand too. But as it was, he could only remain still. "N- no... You- did good," he murmured. "It- it's all... fine."

Although she hadn't been invited to, Vixene made her way inside the cottage and had a little look around. She had seen most of the inukom's things before in her travels, so nothing came off as too much of a surprise to her. Still, the sight of Fawnlock at his mate's side, and the two of them so close was all but foreign to her. Not wanting to impose, but still curious, she kept her distance.

"No it's not, John. I should have been here. I refuse to argue about it." Fawnlock told John firmly. "I know who's attacking you, now. And I'm going to fight against him." He said with determination in his voice.

John smiled weakly. "I know," was all he managed.

Vixene looked on in fascination. Just seeing two creatures of separate species being mates was one thing, but to watch them communicate was something else entirely. And even though the inukom was obviously beaten down by one of Boaran's attacks and she couldn't see him properly because of his covers, it was still clear to Vixene that there was a profound connection between the two.

Fawnlock smiled back and leaned down to gently place a kiss on John's forehead. "For now, you may rest peacefully. I placed spells around the cottage, which will protect you. As will I." He told John.

At that, John dared to close his eyes, as his eyelids were starting to feel like lead anyway. Just having Fawnlock there made him feel more comfortable, and less afraid of what he might wake up to feeling like next.

It was then that Vixene realised just why she sensed so much coming from the two. Not only were they practically glowing with emotion, but there was also a distinct mixture of scents that could only have been the result of one thing. She smelt the distinct scent of two merged mates. She had to hold back a smirk as she came to that conclusion. She would ask about it later, at a less delicate time.

As John closed his eyes, Fawnlock brushed his cheek in a calming manor. Then he stood and walked towards Vixene. " _So... Do you have any ideas?_ " He asked her.

Vixene wanted to reply to that by wittily mentioning the bonding so badly, but refrained from doing so. " _About Boaran? Not too many,_ " she said plainly. " _I was hoping you knew more about his kind and what he does, since you royals always seem to know everything about everyone._ " She grinned up at Fawnlock, as if presenting a challenge.

Fawnlock frowned a little, disliking being called a royal. Still, she was somewhat right. " _I know nothing of this specific, demonic Jasan. Prior to this, I had believed Wolfiarty worked on his own. But I do know about his kind._ " He said.

" _Then why don't we start with what we - well, you - know, and work our way from there,_ " Vixene suggested. " _Even if he's a demon, he's bound to have some forms of jasan dislikes and whatnot._ "

" _Well, that's precisely why I used some plants from the forest to protect this place. But I don't know if they could be used for anything but defense. My kind try our best to hide from Jasan, not fight them._ " Fawnlock explained.

" _Oh, you're all so damn passive,_ " Vixene said and rolled her eyes. " _Has it honestly never occurred to you that one day you might have to do just that? And not with your magic, but with actual contact?_ "

" _No. We never wanted anything to do with them. And it's not as though we're at war with them._ " Fawnlock responded with a scowl. " _No one ever has been. The Jasan have no natural predator._ "

Vixene frowned. " _Hm. Well. That could potentially be a bit problematic_ ," she said. She had another look around the cottage as she spoke, and then glanced over to the inukom. " _You don't suppose he owns anything that could help us, do you? Anything sharp, or noisy?_ "

Immediately, Fawnlock reflected on John's weapons. He knew where they were, and despite never even thinking of wielding one, " _He might..._ " Fawnlock answered. He then walked over to a small dresser, pulled out a drawer and looked over them. John had never truly discussed the mechanics of his weapons, so he had no idea how they'd even work. But when his eyes fell onto the blade that had once cut him free from John's trap, he picked it up and revealed it to Vixene. " _This is all that my mate has._ " He told her.

" _Seriously? All he has are blades?_ " Vixene said, staring at the one in Fawnlock's hand. " _Are you sure he doesn't have one of those... um, oh, what do they call them again..._ " She made a small motion with her hand, and then pointed it at Fawnlock like she was targetting him. " _You know, the ones that go 'pow'?_ Pistols!" she suddenly exclaimed. " _Yes, that's it!_ "

While Fawnlock understood just by the shape of Vixene's hand, he was unsure if they should use them. So he remained looking serious and clueless. " _No. We have no other option. So I suggest we either use it, or resort to using our magic._ " Fawnlock said as he turned to put the blade back.

" _Alright, alright, fine, we'll use it,_ " Vixene said, a bit disappointed, and then looked over to the inukom again. " _But if we do end up having to use our magic, I'm not sure how much good that's going to do. Didn't go over too well with your mate, that much is obvious._ "

Fawnlock's ear twitched irritably, and he gripped the dagger's handle tightly. " _That's because he was in his element. Jasan thrive off of dreams, and the energy around them. He also caught me off guard..._ " He said turning back towards Vixene, " _And I was alone._ "

Although her comment had been intended as mockery, Vixene quickly found that Fawnlock's words were sincere. So she wiped off her smug expression, looking softly at Fawnlock instead. " _Not anymore,_ " she said, daring to lightly touch Fawnlock's hand. " _My magic may not be as good as yours, but now it's two against one. That has to count for something, right?_ "

As soon as Fawnlock registered the small touch, he pulled away slowly so as not to insult Vixene. He nodded and gave her a small smile. " _Yes, I believe it does._ "

" _Good,_ " Vixene replied, taking her hand back after noting that her touch was unwelcome. Darn. " _Sorry about your mate, by the way. I didn't know Boaran had actually done this much already._ "

" _It's not your fault. Besides, once Boaran is gone; John will regain his strength. So I suggest we act quickly._ " Fawnlock told her.

" _Right. Then we need to seek him out, find out where he's hiding_ ," Vixene agreed. " _Or, we could take the more drastic route and wait for him to strike again. Which is of course more risky in terms of both myself and your mate_."

" _I'm not willing to put any more lives at risk for something that I did._ " Fawnlock told her quickly. " _We both know that he wants me. So we'll draw him out, using myself as bait._ " 

Vixene's eyes widened at that, and her soft features disappeared. " _You cannot be serious,_ " she said darkly. " _What if he does more damage than we expect? And what if we fail, and he'll actually succeed?_ "

" _We will succeed. We have to._ " Fawnlock said in a determined tone. " _Besides, I have fought with Wolfiarty._ "

" _Call me crazy, but I don't think that's a reasonable comparison,_ " Vixene responded, growing a bit frustrated with Fawnlock's cluelessness. " _Wolfiarty was a vauk, someone who thrives on physical violence and hunts. Boaran literally gets into your head. Even if you do meet him up front, he'll always have the upper hand._ "

" _But I can do that just as well. It happened while I was fighting with Wolfiarty. I was able to get inside of his mind. If I can reach that level of power again, I'll be able to stop him._ " Fawnlock told her.

" _Oh, yeah, please do reach the level of power that risked you turning into a demon yourself!_ " Vixene exclaimed. " _That won't make things complicated at all!_ "

" _The point is that I didn't turn into a demon! Which means I can do it again. Ever since that day I've been growing stronger, and more powerful!_ " Fawnlock shouted. " _With that power, combined with yours, we'll be able to take him down!_ "

" _So you're actually willing to take the risk of it happening again?_ " Vixene yelled back. " _After what happened last time? When you were honestly considering strangling your mate?_ " She said the last words while pointing at John, and only then did she notice that there was a bit of movement under the covers. She instantly clamped her mouth shut, and just stared.

In the bed, John was slowly waking up from his sort rest, and although he was still a bit worn out, he was relieved to find that he felt less weak than before. That, and he was actually able to move. So he shifted on the bed, turning to the direction of the noise that had woken him. "Fawwn...?"

Right when he heard John's voice, he set down the knife and went directly to John's side. "Shh, John. It's all right. I'm sorry I woke you." He said softly.

"What's all the... yelling?" John had to ask. "Is someone here?"

Vixene didn't understand all of what Fawnlock's mate was saying, but she could tell he was confused, so she decided to present herself. After all, there was no harm in just a simple introduction, what with the inukom being too weak to do anything drastic. Taking a moment to try and remember the basics of the inukom she had learned during her transformations, she slowly approached Fawnlock and his mate, and bowed slightly.

"Hello," she said, trying not to make her speech sound too strained. "Am Vixene. Am helped your partner- being... inukom."

Fawnlock was momentarily surprised by the fact that Vixene could speak John's language. But he soon remembered that she had changed into an inukom many times before. He looked between the two of them and nodded. " _His name is_ John." Fawnlock told her.

"John," Vixene repeated, and chuckled. " _That's an odd name._ "

At the sound of his name, John perked a bit, but kept still. She looked Vixene over, impressed that such a relatively small creature had been able to give Fawnlock the chance of being human. But because he couldn't speak their language, he directed his words at Fawnlock. "What's she doing here?"

"She's here to help fight against the demon who attacked you. He is after her, as well." Fawnlock explained.

"Really?" John said, this time to Vixene. "Why? What did you do?"

Darn, this would be difficult. "Demon am, targeting all who have helped Fawnlock," Vixene replied, and then gestured to herself. "Am helped being inukom," she pointed towards John, "John, am partner, helped much."

Fawnlock was unsure if John understood anything Vixene was saying. "What she means to say is that he's after me. And after everyone who's helped me in any way. Vixene was the one who... helped me become inukom." He clarified.

"And that's why he's attacked her," John said, just to make sure. Vixene nodded. "And because I'm his mate, I've helped him a lot, so that's why I'm getting the sourest end. Was that what you were trying to say?"

"Yes!" Vixene said, her ears flicking in excitement. "John- is?" she began, waiting for John to approve of her words - he nodded, so she continued, "John is- best target for getting Fawnlock."

"Which is why we're going to fight, and you're staying here." Fawnlock told John.

"What? No, are you mad?" John said instantly. "If the demon's after you, I can't just sit back and do nothing. There's got to be something I can do to protect you. Anything."

"John, you are still weak." Fawnlock said, though he knew this fact alone wasn't going to convince him. He placed a hand on John's chest, "I know it's hard. But we're bonded, John. Our souls are connected. If you die, then I will die as well. By going alone, I will be protecting the both of us." He said.

Vixene was about to speak, but held back at the last second because she knew exactly why Fawnlock had said such a preposterous thing.

"Then what about you?" John had to ask. "What if you die fighting this thing?"

Fawnlock held the side of John's face and searched his eyes. "That won't happen. I've been growing stronger in my magic every day. I swear, I will protect you. Just like my promise, in the forest, remember?" He asked with a smile, even though he could feel his heart breaking.

John found it very difficult to believe Fawnlock, especially since what they were up against was extremely powerful. He reached over to hold Fawnlock's free hand, irritated that he wasn't able to grab it as tightly as he wanted. "Please, Fawnlock," he begged, "please be careful. I don't-- You absolutely cannot die on me, do you understand?"

When he heard that, Fawnlock nodded. "Yes, of course. I promise, John. I will come back to you." He said softly.

"You have to," John said, still not feeling all too reassured. That, and the demon must have worn him out considerably, because he was feeling far needier than usual. "You just have to, okay? I... I can't lose you."

Vixene looked on, adoring the determination in John's tone, but at the same time a bit worried about what would come out of all of this. Particularly because John genuinely seemed to want to help, to fight.

"You won't lose me." Fawnlock told him, and gave him a gentle kiss on the lips. He pulled away and looked into John's eyes. "I love you."

John looked back at Fawnlock, sadness and fear evident in his expression. "I love you too," he said. "So much."

"Fawnlock," Vixene suddenly said, reminding John that she was still there. " _I hate to separate you from your mate, especially at such a tender moment, but we really must start planning our strategies and fight against Boaran._ "

Fawnlock gave her a quick glance before he spoke to John. "I must talk with Vixene. And then we will leave." He said before standing up. He faced Vixene, though they still stood close to John's bedside. " _You're good at climbing trees. We will use that to our advantage_." He proposed.

" _Yes, I like the sound of that,_ " Vixene agreed. " _And if we actually do go with your bait idea, it'll also give you some assurance that I'm watching over you._ " Out of the corner of her eye, she saw John squirm a bit when Fawnlock stood up, so she decided to express what had been on her mind. " _Why did you lie to him?_ "

The words caused Fawnlock to slightly roll his eyes. " _I had to. Otherwise he would have begged to come with us. He is weak, and if he comes he will most-likely be Boaran's first target_." He hissed.

" _How can you be sure?_ " Vixene asked. " _If he came with us, it's just as likely that he would target you or me, since we'd all be together._ "

"Boaran will go for the weakest. It's a guarantee. It's in every predator's nature. And I can't risk losing him. John isn't coming with us, and that's final." Fawnlock snapped.

Vixene frowned. " _Alright, fine, we'll leave him,_ " she said, resisting the urge to growl in frustration. " _But don't come whining to me if he gets attacked again while we're away._ "

" _He won't._ " Fawnlock said instantly. " _I have this entire cottage surrounded with protective magic. Now I suggest we leave and take care of this. Go on ahead, I'd like another moment with my mate._ "

" _I'll have a look around, then, I guess,_ " Vixene said as she made her way to the door. " _Don't take too long, though. I'd like an extra set of eyes on the ground too._ " And with that, she exited the cottage, knowing Fawnlock would probably want to be alone.

This time Fawnlock kneeled beside the bed and took John's hand into his. "I'm leaving now... I'll be back soon." He said gently.

John stirred, having dozed off for a second even through his worries. He instinctively went to sit up to look at Fawnlock properly, but was only able to prop himself up a bit. And even that required a lot of effort. "You can't be sure of that," he said weakly, hating to say it, but knowing it was true.

"I know, but you have to trust me. Trust me to protect you." Fawnlock said.

"I do," John replied instantly. "I do. Be- believe me, after what you've done for me, I trust no one else to do that. I just- want you to be safe."

"I will. I promise." Fawnlock reassured John with a small smile.

"Good," John said, trying to smile as well. "Because if you don't, I may have to kill you myself just for being so reckless."

At that, Fawnlock huffed a small laugh. "I'll hold you to it." He said just before leaning down to kiss John on the lips. When he pulled away he looked at his mate fondly and said, "I love you."

"I love you too," John croaked back, managing to lightly squeeze Fawnlock's hand. "Now, go. If you're going to- stop that bloody bear, you'll need all the time you can get."

Fawnlock gave John a slight nod, released his hand and stood up from the bed. Without another word Fawnlock turned away and walked out of the cottage. When he shut the door behind him, he felt a sense of dread wash over him. But after thinking back to what he had said, the feeling left as soon as it came. He felt more determined than ever. Fawnlock straightened himself up and walked on.

As soon as the door closed, John felt unreasonably rejected, as if Fawnlock was doing this solely to leave him. Of course, deep down he knew that was just the remnants of the most recent demon attack, but the thought lingered longer than it should have. He felt as if someone had poured ice-cold water all over him, drenching him in fear, doubt, and worry.


	20. Chapter 20

Though Fawnlock had no actual idea of where Boaran lived, he knew of a place in the forest where most demons did. So that's where he decided to lead Vixene. It had once been Wolfiarty's forest, so Fawnlock figured it would be the best place to start looking. Fawnlock walked along the forest floor, and caught a glimpse of Vixene in the trees beside him. She wasn't incredibly high up, so he called out to her. " _Vixene! I have a question for you_."

Vixene was surprised to hear the call, and automatically tightened her hold on the branch she was currently on, so as to not fall down. She scanned the ground beneath her, soon finding Fawnlock looking up at her. " _Ask away,_ " she called back.

" _You said this had everything to do with Wolfiarty... What did you mean by that?_ " Fawnlock asked.

Vixene huffed. " _I told you, the one thing that creates a demon is hate and anger,_ " she replied. " _You of all people should know where the worst kind of both emotions come from. You nearly experienced it yourself._ "

Fawnlock blinked at Vixene, becoming even more confused, until the last of her words reached his ears. " _What do you mean? Are you trying to say that this demon, Boaran, and Wolfiarty were mates?_ " He asked as though the last word placed an awful taste in his mouth.

" _That's exactly what I'm saying,_ " Vixene replied with a nod. " _And before you ask, yes, Boaran was actually a demon before, hence why he and Wolfiarty actually worked as mates. But I think you killing Wolfiarty made him stronger and more vengeful or something like that. At least, he wouldn't stop gloating about that when he attacked me_."

" _Demons as mates?_ " Fawnlock asked in a disbelieving tone. " _A vouk and a jasan, no less..._ "

That made Vixene snigger. " _I don't think you're really in position to judge other's mate choices,_ " she said in a teasing tone.

Fawnlock blushed fiercely at the comment before turning away and frowning. " _Enough. I know where we might find this demon, so I suggest we start looking._ " He said as he walked on.

Vixene grinned as she followed him from up above. " _I'm just saying, you know,_ " she said, still meaning to tease. " _Kind of ironic coming from a Harina prince who's bonded with an--_ "

" _I said, enough!_ " Fawnlock shouted. " _I know what I did, and I am glad of it. But John and I are in love. To think that selfish creatures like a vouk or a jasan to feel the same... it seems ridiculous. Especially considering they were demons._ "

" _Well, they shared some... interests, you could say,_ " Vixene said. " _I'm not saying they were in love, but more that they were extremely possessive of each other. According to Boaran, anyway._ "

" _I see..._ " Fawnlock said more to himself than Vixene. " _The other thing I don't understand is why he hasn't tried to kill me sooner. Not that I wish for death... but it has been a while since Wolfiarty's death._ "

" _Oh Fawnlock, I thought you were cleverer than this_ ," Vixene sighed, resisting the urge to pinch the bridge of her nose. " _Boaran didn't know about Wolfiarty's death until fairly recently. I mean, now that you know that they were mates, and that they were so possessive of one another, why do you think Wolfiarty approached you alone? Come on. Surely you can work that one out on your own._ "

Fawnlock understood immediately. " _Winter sleep. Of course, he might be a demon, but he's still jasan. Figures._ "

" _Exactly,_ " Vixene said, feeling mildly proud of Fawnlock for having known that. Well, of course he did. " _Which makes him even angrier about this whole business since he couldn't even be there for his mate when he died._ "

Even as Vixene spoke, Fawnlock felt no remorse or any sympathy towards the demons. " _Which, of course, makes this all the more dangerous._ "

\--

For the first time since this started, John is immediately aware that he is in a dream. He has a look around, surprised to find that his mind and the demon's seem to have melded, in that he is dreaming about a familiar setting, but the demon's influence is making it mad and wild. He's in the cave he, Fawnlock and Doelly slept in when they were going to see the tribe during Fawnlock's heldua. But it's far darker and more sinister than it was in reality, especially with the seemingly living shadows on the walls. John shudders, knowing he shouldn't be scared of dreams, but it's still creepy.

"Impressive, isn't it?" a voice suddenly says, making John jerk towards it. "You're quite the sentimental one, I can tell."

John just stares. It's the first time he's seen the demon, and he honestly doesn't know what he expected. If he had thought that Wolfiarty's fur was wild and all over the place, it had nothing on this one's, which is coming out in all directions, dirty, greasy and bulky, and the blackest black John has ever seen. The demon itself is extremely buff and broad; its hunched shoulders making it seem even bigger than it already is. Its eyes are practically slits, but they're glowing with such ferocity that John shudders again when he accidentally looks directly into them.

The demon smirks when it sees John observing it, and chuckles. "I see you like my true form," it says, baring its large, sharp teeth. John momentarily wonders if its jaw is as strong as a real bear's. "I thought it would be more fitting for you to see me as I truly am, and not just your paranoia taking over all the time." The demon nods eerily politely. "The name is Boaran. And I'm assuming you know my goal already?"

"Yes," John says plainly, keeping his straight stance, showing no fear. "But it won't do you any good. Fawnlock is already on to you, and looking for you. He'll kill you before you'll even get a chance to kill him."

To John's surprise, Boaran doesn't just grin mockingly like he expected; he laughs. "Kill him?" he repeats before letting out a few more dark chuckles. "Oh, please. If I wanted to kill him, I'd be in his brain right now, not yours."

At that, John perks a bit, raising an eyebrow. "But you're using those around him to get to him," he says, convinced that that's the truth.

Boaran laughs even more. "Boy, I knew you inukom were thick, but I never expected you to be this utterly stupid!" he exclaims. "Just because I implied something to the lisica, doesn't mean that's what I mean to do. You of all species should know that what you say to others isn't necessarily the truth. In this case, I merely bended it to fit my real mission. My act of revenge, if you will."

"Yeah?" John challenges, folding his arms. "And what's that?"

"Oh, you poor creature," Boaran sighs, still grinning. "Haven't you figured it out yet? Killing the rebel prince is the least of my concern. I don't care about his life in the slightest. No, you see, Fawnlock murdered my mate in the cruelest way. So now I intend to do the same to his."

\--

" _I still don't see how you're going to attack a jasan up front with a damn blade_ ," Vixene pointed out as the two of them walked on, still keeping an eye out for Boaran.

As Fawnlock reflected on Vixene's words, he looked at the blade. " _I doubt I'll go at him with the blade alone. I still have my magic._ " He replied.

" _You'd better, or he'll kill you on the spot_ ," Vixene said, and then went silent for a while. After a few more moments, she couldn't help herself any longer, and stopped climbing the trees. She slid down just a tad, so that she could look directly at Fawnlock, and tried not to look as smug as he felt. " _Okay, I can't take this anymore. I have to ask: what was it like bonding with an inukom?_ "

When Vixene had come down from the trees, Fawnlock assumed something was wrong so he froze in his tracks. As soon as she spoke, however he felt his face flush and gave her an irritated look. " _Why in all the five realms would you want to know? I didn't bond with him as an inukom, if that's what you're asking_."

Vixene's ears perked, and she grinned. " _Oh, that makes it even more interesting!_ " she said excitedly. " _Interspecies bonding... What was that like?_ "

If it were even possible, Fawnlock looked more perturbed than before. He was considering not even giving Vixene an answer, but he found himself speaking before he could stop. " _It... It was incredible. He was extraordinary, and, loving and considerate. We aren't as... different as I had been led to think. And our souls really did bond. I... I can feel it._ "

The response turned out to be far more emotional than Vixene expected, and her smug face fell. " _Wow..._ " she breathed. " _So, I'm guessing he was the one who... entered you?_ "

Fawnlock's cheeks grew a deeper shade of red, and he walked past Vixene. " _I am not answering that._ "

Instantly, Vixene's smirk returned, and she followed Fawnlock. " _And now you won't have to,_ " she said, and then sighed. " _Wow. Considerate, loving... That's everything I've been looking for in an inukom in my travels. I think you've found the perfect one_."

The anger and embarrassment dissipated, and Fawnlock smiled. " _I suppose I have..._ " He said fondly.

" _I can see why you're so protective of him_ ," Vixene continued. " _If he was my mate, I wouldn't want him out of my sight either. Both because I'd be really possessive, and because he is rather good-looking for an inukom._ "

Fawnlock felt more pleasant warmth spread across his cheeks as he smiled wider. " _Yes. He is, isn't he?_ "

" _Which makes it all the more important to save him," Vixene concluded. "So let's get to it._ "

\--

John gapes openmouthed at Boaran. He's not even sure what he wants to ask about first; the fact that demons were mates, or the fact that he's the target. Eventually, he just shakes his head and runs a hand down his face.

"Take your time, dear," Boaran says calmly. "I know it's a lot to take in, especially for someone like you. But don't take too long. I want to start sooner than later."

Finally, John speaks. "So let me get this straight, you want to kill me as some weird revenge scheme because Fawnlock killed Wolfiarty?" he says, just to wrap his head around the absurdity of the situation. "How the hell does that even work? Not the revenge part, but the whole... you being mates thing."

At that, Boaran huffs angrily, his eyes flaring. "We may be demons, but that doesn't mean we don't feel the basic primal instincts of wanting a mate," he tells John. "He was everything I wanted in a mate. Twisted, irrational, fiendish... He was a complete thrill."

Boaran looks at John with an expression John can almost call soft. It's really not. "He changed my life. After I became a demon, he was the only one who dared to approach me. And even then, he wasn't cautious about it. He bossed me around, ordered me to kill things, just for amusement. He was absolutely mental, and it was... so stimulating..."

John swallows, not wanting to know any graphic details about the demons' lives. What he does think about, though, are the sight parallels between him and Boaran. He can't deny that Fawnlock changed his life as well, and that being with him is a complete thrill. And that he's mental.

"I should probably feel sorry for your loss, then," he says just to fill in the silence as Boaran muses. "But I really don't. Wolfiarty almost killed Fawnlock. And me, for that matter, but that's not really the issue."

Boaran instantly seems to snap out of his thoughts. "Ah, but you forget the keyword: almost," he says, putting extra emphasis on the last word. "He didn't do any harm. Not really. But now I'm going to do that to you." With that, he flicks his large hand (hand? Paw? John's not even sure anymore), which causes some kind of force to throw John hard against the cave wall. He grunts as he makes contact, feeling his skin bruise and tear as the loose rocks stab him.

"How are you even doing that?" he says through gritted teeth, trying to bite back another grunt as Boaran shoves him harder. "Fawnlock- did something to the cottage. He said it'd hold you back!" Or something to that extent.

"Yes, I noticed," Boaran growls as he approaches John with a raised arm. "But he never said he'd be able to stop me, now did he? And since he is holding me back," he continues as he slashes at John's face, "this isn't nearly the kind of power I'm capable of."

John's face aches, and he feels the scratch wounds pound as the blood pours. He pants, trying to remain levelheaded, but just as he's starting to accept the pain, Boaran strikes again, slashing his chest. This time, John screams.

"And doesn't that scare you to death?"

\--

The closer Fawnlock and Vixene got to the darker part of the forest, the more their surroundings began to change. The trees looked more dead than alive, and there were signs of destruction on the forest floor. Even though Fawnlock wasn't able to catch a jasan scent, he still remained cautious.

Vixene only found this part of the forest vaguely familiar. While she had certainly visited it in the past, she had never ventured too far into it. She noticed the trees steadily getting more fragile, and worried that the branches would eventually snap under her weight, little as it was. Still, she kept her eyes on Fawnlock while looking around, knowing that he would be able to sense anything before she could.

As Fawnlock walked along, he started to become more anxious about this entire ordeal. The more he thought about it, the more he began to doubt he'd even stand a chance. He began to think desperately for another solution or advantage he could gain. Fawnlock began to turn the knife over in his hand, when he reached a conclusion. He looked up into the trees, " _Vixene, I've got it!_ "

" _Did you smell him?_ " Vixene called back, now starting to feel a bit anxious as well.

" _No! I know what to do. I can poison the blade_." Fawnlock said.

Vixene's face fell, feeling a bit disappointed but relieved at the same time. At least they still had some more time. " _How are you going to do that?_ " she asked, scanning the area. " _Practically nothing lives here that could help._ "

Fawnlock only smiled at Vixene. " _That's where you're wrong. Everything here is made to look dead, but it's actually cursed. Among the stories I've been told, I've heard of an ancient place where a single cursed tree grows. It's fruit so poisonous, just one tiny sample of its contents will result in death._ "

As Fawnlock explained, Vixene signature grin gradually came back. " _Excellent_ ," she said when he was done speaking. " _Then all we have to do is find that darn tree. And I'm guessing you don't know where it is, seeing as you've just heard stories_."

The smile began to fall from Fawnlock's lips the moment this fact was brought to his attention. " _Not exactly, no. But those same stories have said that the tree resides in the center of the forest; where it is darkest_."

" _Alright. At least now we have a place to go," Vixene replied. "Do you have good night vision?_ "

" _I can see relatively well at night, yes_." Fawnlock said.

" _That'll do, I guess,_ " Vixene said with a shrug. She continued climbing the trees, noting how dead they were the further she went. " _So now we'll just have to hope Boaran still doesn't know we're on to him._ "

\--

There's a distinct ringing in John's ears now, and he isn't sure if he caused it with his screaming, or if it's a response to the blinding pain left by Boaran's scratches. Both his face and his chest have four large gashes on them that are now bleeding excessively. John tries to hold it together, but ends up struggling to keep himself conscious. He focuses on Boaran, who is now laughing loudly at him.

"This is too easy, even with your so-called protection," he then says as he looks at his hand, seemingly proud of what he has done. He lightly licks one of his claws and smacks his lips with a grin. "Well, well, what do you know? You taste sweet. With all that buff I expected you to be a bit stronger, or even bitter."

John's sight is beginning to falter, but because he knows that if he passes out in his dream, he'll wake up, he stubbornly fights against it. "Wh... wha... what's, going to... happen... to the... real... me?" he asks, every word causing more pain in his chest.

Boaran makes a small face as if he's weighing something, and then replies: "Not too much. But you have noticed a decrease in energy, I hope. That's what this is about. The more I kill you in your dreams, the more your real body suffers. A wound here, a slower working organ there... My guess is that your blood's been drained a bit too." He smiles maniacally. "In the end, I suppose, it's all about killing you as slowly and painfully as I can."

With that, he approaches John, and without hesitation, stabs him in the good shoulder with his claw. John just takes it, not trusting himself to scream this time. Boaran shoves his claw deep inside, until his fingertip touches John's skin, and all the while, he's still wearing that wicked grin. "And you know what the best thing is?" he says, looming over John before leaning in close to his ear to growl: "your trusty little Fawnlock has no idea that he's failed to help you. I can let you wake up now, just to get this session over with, but I'll come back for more. And by the time your mate realises that you're steadily dying despite his efforts to save you, it'll already be too late."

Even though he is in such pain that he can barely see, John musters a response: "You... you're... wrong." And with that, he's gone, Boaran's laughter echoing in the background.

Just like that, John was jerked awake, as if someone had shoved him out of bed. Only this time, he didn't even feel like he was awake at all, but stuck in some state between sleeping and waking. It was as though his stomach and lungs had shrunk and dried up somehow, which made him feel immense pain every time he took a breath. He tried to curl up, soon finding that he already had, quite tightly at that. He was sweating like the cottage was on fire, and yet shivering from cold at the same time.

Because of all this, John became extremely aware of how alone he was. Now granted, John was a former soldier, and surviving on his own despite massive injuries shouldn't have been a challenge to him. But the fact was, he felt so damn weak and helpless that all his times out on the battlefield alone was nothing compared to this. Not to mention the fact that, essentially, his whole body was slowly shutting down.

Eventually, John Watson, the ever brave soldier, ended up weeping softly at the thought of dying without getting to see Fawnlock one last time. Or to say goodbye. Or to have him near. The worst part, though, was that Fawnlock had told him that they were connected in such a way that if he died, Fawnlock would die as well. So if he wasn't strong enough (which was becoming more and more likely with each attack), he would be responsible for his mate's death. John quietly sobbed as he tried to say something out loud, as if someone would hear him: "I'm s- sorry, Fawn...”


	21. Chapter 21

It felt as though they had been walking for miles, as they searched the dark forest for the poisonous tree. The further they walked, the thicker the wood became; which shrouded a large majority of the sunlight from above. Fawnlock remained on his guard, in case Boaran had other surprises for them. As far as he knew; the forest was now properly Boaran's. Though he doubted Boaran was any better of a ruler than Wolfiarty was.

While they walked, Fawnlock grew curious so he looked up into the trees. " _Vixene! How far ahead are you able to see?_ " he asked.

" _Far enough that I know that the forest only gets darker from here,_ " Vixene replied as she looked on. " _I don't think I've ever seen so much black in my life. And it just doesn't stop._ "

" _Well, at least we know we're headed in the right direction._ " Fawnlock said.

" _And then it's just a matter of finding Boaran himself,_ " Vixene added with a small sigh. " _You don't suppose he's tried to attack your mate again, do you?_ "

" _It's a possibility. But even if he did, my spells should help protect John._ " Fawnlock said, not willing to dwell on what would happen if they failed. Just then, a paralyzing thought occurred in his mind. " _Wait... if Boaran wanted me in the first place, why was he attacking John?_ "

" _I just assumed he was using John to get to you,_ " Vixene replied. " _Make you see what kind of magic you're in for._ " She paused, and looked down on Fawnlock. " _Why do you ask?_ "

" _It just seems odd to me. If he wanted me dead, then why not attack me directly? Why would he allow me to seek him out, when he had the power to place me in John's condition?_ " Fawnlock asked, though he didn't expect Vixene to truly answer him. " _Unless..._ "

Vixene's eyes widened in realisation, and her grip on the branch tightened. " _Unless you're not the real target,_ " she breathed.

Fawnlock felt his blood boil at the thought. " _Why didn't I see it sooner? Of course he's after John! I killed his mate, so he wants to kill mine._ " He growled.

The fact that Vixene had to have this pointed out to her made her feel like the biggest idiot in all the five realms. She should have seen it as well; it was almost too obvious now. " _So why attack him so often?_ "

" _To torture him, no doubt. I only saw a fraction of what he had done to John in one dream. I cannot fathom the nightmares John has endured from that point on._ " Fawnlock said. He looked back at the trail behind him; the urge to turn around and go back to John was becoming stronger.

Vixene noticed the way Fawnlock glanced back, and with a tired sigh, she climbed down a bit to have a better look at him. Now that they knew the real target, it was evident that Fawnlock was worried about his mate. Vixene didn't even have to ask - she could see it. " _Do you want to go back?_ " she offered, even though she knew it would serve no purpose to do so.

" _I want to... but I know I shouldn't._ " Fawnlock said as he looked towards Vixene. " _Besides… I’d hate to say it but if there's a chance Boaran is able to attack John, Boaran will be asleep. Which will give us another advantage._ "

" _Okay,_ " Vixene said and nodded as she slowly climbed back up again, always keeping her eyes on Fawnlock. " _We'd better hurry, then. Just in case._ "

Fawnlock nodded and began to pick up the pace again. He prayed to the gods above that John was alright. Fawnlock couldn't live with himself if John died in such a cruel and terrifying way. He simply wouldn't allow it. So together, Vixene and Fawnlock ventured further into the darkness; hoping to find the tree and be able to take down Boaran before he could get to John first.

\--

Because he knew that if he stayed in bed he would only grow drowsier, John made his way to get up, or to sit up at the very least. It was far more painful than he expected, as every single muscle was screaming at him not to be used. Moreover, if he didn't know better, he could have sworn that some of his bones were broken. His head was pounding hard, and his entire body was protesting his every movement, demanding that he rather lie down and rest.

John struggled to move, every single cell in his body telling him to stop so he wouldn't do more damage to himself. He ignored it, which was difficult seeing as how just the hint of movement was unbelievably painful. This was nothing like the hangover he had gotten before. This felt like he had been attacked by a steamroller. Even just breathing was torture.

After a few minutes of slow movements and unbelievable pain, John found himself sitting on the edge of the bed, his feet on the floor. He took in deep, shaking breaths, trying to remain strong while at the same time he knew it was pointless. But he had to. For Fawnlock's sake. God, he hoped Fawnlock was alright. John needed him to be.

Slowly, John raised his hands and rubbed at his temples, trying to at least soothe his throbbing headache if anything. He closed his eyes to keep himself relaxed, but instantly opened them again when he remembered that he was trying to stay awake, no matter how hard it was. As he rubbed, he had an odd feeling of being watched, so he had a look around the cottage. The only thing that revealed was that he was seeing spots before his eyes, no doubt caused by the fact that he felt like he hadn't slept for weeks.

Well, there was that, and the rats. Huge, hairy rats gnawing their way through the walls and crawling into the cottage in streams. John gasped, wondering how the hell that was even happening, since Fawnlock's magic should have warded off all creatures. Instantly, his previously calm breathing sped up, and he began panicking, causing himself even more pain. The rats made their way towards his bed, where they snarled and chomped in an intimidating manner. John lifted his feet from the floor and hugged his knees close to his chest, staring at the rats, completely petrified.

\--

By the time they made their way into the middle of the forest, it seemed as though the sun had already set and they were under a darkened moon. Luckily, Fawnlock's eyes had adjusted and he was able to see alright. Their surroundings looked more sinister and unpleasant, the more they continued. The terrain was turning more rough and rocky, which kept Fawnlock more on the alert.

The conversations between the two of them had died, in fear they would be overheard. It was eerie how quiet the forest was, because it was nearly devoid of life. Until Fawnlock picked up an echoed sound of heavy breathing. The sound caused Fawnlock to freeze in his tracks, trying to determine where it was coming from.

Vixene didn't even have to be watching Fawnlock to know that something was wrong. Or, at least, that they were getting closer to what they were looking for. She heard the breathing as well, her ears flicking in all directions as she listened for its source. Because she didn't want to risk her voice being too loud, she instead climed down from the tree entirely and stood next to Fawnlock, still listening for the breathing. " _He's near,_ " she whispered as she looked around.

" _Obviously. There aren't that many beastly demons who would seek refuge in a cave._ " Fawnlock snapped at the same volume. Even though they were close to Boaran, he wasn't sure if he was willing to give up the search for the fruit. Fawnlock was torn.

" _And only one would be arrogant enough to leave himself exposed like this,_ " Vixene said with a grin, certain that she was getting closer to hearing exactly where the cave was located. She had a look at Fawnlock, and tilted her head. " _Something wrong?_ "

" _To be honest, even with Boaran sleeping the chances we'll succeed in slaying him by the knife alone are still slim. I feel as though we should also find the fruit._ " Fawnlock told her.

Vixene frowned. " _But we can't risk the chance of losing this place, and not finding the cave at all_ ," she pointed out. " _So, really, our best bet is to split up._ "

Fawnlock looked a bit surprised, and wondered why he hadn't thought of it sooner. " _Well alright, if you think so. I can find the cave, if you can find the fruit._ " He suggested.

" _Alright, then I'll need the blade,_ " Vixene said as she reached out her hand, a determined look on her face.

For a moment, Fawnlock hesitated when she requested it, as it was one of his means of protection. Still, he nodded and handed the knife over to Vixene. " _Go, and be quick about it. We have no time to lose._ "

With a nod, Vixene took the knife and set out to find the fruit. With all this blackness, it couldn't be too far away. " _Don't worry about it,_ " she told Fawnlock. " _Just make sure you find the cave without getting yourself killed. I came to you for protection, remember?_ "

Fawnlock gave Vixene a nod. " _Yes, alright._ " He responded before watching her slip into the darkness. He closed his eyes in order to concentrate on the sound he was hearing. It was faint, but very distinctive. Fawnlock found himself softly reflecting the same pattern. He twitched his ears until he was sure of the direction it was coming from. Fawnlock opened his eyes and took a step in that direction.

The forest was so dark; Fawnlock's vision was almost rendered useless. It felt as though he was walking through a thick, black fog. So he chose to use more of his hearing and touch to guide him. He knew he was close not only because of the sound, but because of the rock beneath his feet. The closer he got, the more his heart began to pound. Fawnlock was somewhat grateful the forest was covered in darkness. Because he honestly didn't know what would happen if he saw the beast. Even though he was afraid of Boaran, he was also furious with him.

When the breathing resonated inside of his skull, Fawnlock knew he was closer than ever. He reached out in the darkness, and met a cold rock that Fawnlock could only assume was a part of the mountain. It was at this moment he realised the sound was coming from above his head. Without a second thought in his mind, Fawnlock began to climb.

\--

It wasn't until the rats came up to the edge of John's bed that he let out a sound. What he intended was to scream; what came out was a pathetic squeak, not to dissimilar to the ones the rats were making. He could hear his heartbeat pounding in his ears, and the anxiety creeping up on him. He hadn't felt this kind of panic since he had been caught on the field - and even then, that hadn't been nearly this bad. All that plus his sleep deprivation (which was ironic, seeing as how he had almost done nothing but sleep for the past two days) made him shake and tremble, which of course made the pain in his body even worse.

The rats began climbing up John's bed, and instead of squeaking, they were hissing now, baring their teeth. Under any other circumstances, John would have laughed at seeing rats with sharp canine teeth and jaws that looked like they could chew rocks. But in this state, it made him even more terrified than before, and he scrambled on the bed to try and get away from them.

Ignoring the throbbing pain in his entire body, he tried swatting at the rats to get them away, but nothing worked. He kicked and shoved, but they wouldn't budge, their hold on his sheets hard enough to rip. Nothing he did had any effect whatsoever, resulting in his breathing becoming even more irregular and erratic. Something in the back of his mind told him to calm himself down, to try and think rational thoughts, but all he could focus on was getting eaten by giant rats, so the panic kept rising, rising, until he felt the first chomp on his foot.

With another squeak-scream, he kicked the rat, with no avail, of course, only to have more of them to attack him next. Eventually, John found himself lying on his bed, squirming and twitching and trying to scream as the rats practically tore him apart.

\--

Taking extra caution, Fawnlock continued to crawl over the steep ledge. He could still hear Boaran clearly. The sound against the silent forest caused Fawnlock to feel as though the jasan was breathing down his neck. He approached the mouth of the cave carefully, so that he wouldn't wake the demon. Fawnlock peered inside, overlooking the cave and its inhabitant.

It was as he had hoped and feared; Boaran was still sleeping. He could barely see the demon with his dark brown fur. At this point, all Fawnlock could do was hope. He hoped that Vixene would find her way to the tree, and to the cave. And he hoped that John still had the strength to defend himself against Boaran.

\--

"Had enough yet?" John hears someone ask in deep, almost growling voice. The moment he does, he notices how he isn't nearly as weak as he was before. Which can only mean one thing.

John looks up to see Boaran in his cottage, looming over him in his bed, as if he hasn't moved from the rat attack. But wait. Was there ever a rat attack? Was that one of Boaran's schemes? "Before I answer that, I want to ask you something," he says. "Did you send mutant rats to attack me?"

At first, it seems as though Boaran has no idea what John is talking about, but quickly, he sports a large grin and chuckles. "No, but that's a very interesting idea. I might put that to use some day," he replies. "No, my guess is that you were just hallucinating. It comes with the sleep deprivation, you see."

Of course. Of course it was. It's the only explanation for why John wasn't able to do anything to them. He mentally kicks himself for not having thought of that, but then again, he wasn't exactly in the best of states at the time. "Alright, fair enough," he then tells Boaran. "As for your question, I think I can take more in my sleep. It's my waking self that I'm more concerned about."

"And you should be," Boaran agrees with a nod. "I'd say you have little more than a day to live now. Less if I manage to have my way with you again now."

John shudders. "Don't word it like that, please," he says, disgusted and horrified at the same time.

Boaran smirks. "Oh come now, I won't resort to that kind of nonsense," he says. "In order for that to happen, I'd have to want some kind of control over you, or attraction towards you. And we both know that's not quite true. Well, aside from the control part, but I already have that."

With a frown, John stands up from his bed and glares at Boaran. "So what, then?" he says. "What do you intend to do now? Torture me some more? Stab me? Scratch me? Rip me apart?"

Just as John lets go of the last word, Boaran slashes him, making him gasp in pain and hold on to his stomach, where the claw marks are now. "What I want is for you to shut up!" Boaran roars, knocking John over by hitting him in the head and then slashing at his legs. "In case you've forgotten, inukom, I didn't come here to talk. I came here to kill you!"

John drops to the ground, his bleeding legs unable to hold him up. This is so unlike all the other times, where Boaran usually built up his attacks either with smooth talk, or by making the pain slow. To have been attacked this quickly comes as such a surprise to John that he has no way of defending himself anymore. He lies on the ground, coughing and sputtering, noticing that he's now lying in a pool of his own blood. Boy, that was quick. He looks up to see Boaran standing over him, and it's only now that John sees that the bear is drooling. Holy hell.

\--

Now that Fawnlock was in such close proximity of Boaran, the deep breaths he took rattled within his head. More than that, Fawnlock heard a distinct growling sound come from the demon. He was worried that Boaran had woken up, but he barely moved from his position with his back towards Fawnlock.

\--

"Just imagine," John just barely hears Boaran say as he creeps closer to his ear, "the amount of pain you'd be in if your precious little mate hadn't put up those pathetic protections. I could be ripping you apart limb from limb, breaking your bones and scratching at your insides. And you would feel everything."

It's not so much the threats that are making John shiver, but the imagery. The idea of him lying on the ground practically mashed is not something he wants to think about. Not to mention, what if that's how he would end up looking in real life? He doesn't want Fawnlock to walk in on him like that. "Should I... consider myself lucky, then?" he manages to say, just uttering words making his stomach sting.

"You should, yes," Boaran agrees as he drags one claw down John's face, leaving a bloody trail in its wake. "But then again, this isn't exactly something you can just walk away from, now is it?"

\--

Outside, Boaran's breathing became a rumble, and he even let out a low growl every now and then. He reached out one hand and scratched at the ground, ripping up loose rocks and pebbles. As he did this, he let out a low, drowsy chuckle before sighing, as if he was extremely pleased with himself.

Fawnlock looked on with curiosity, and an underlining sense of fear. He cringed slightly when Boaran clawed at the ground. Fawnlock swallowed thickly at the thought of those claws making contact with him. He began to wonder what horrors Boaran was inflicting on his mate. The more he did that, the more fear ebbed into anger. Still, he tried to remain focused on the task at hand.

\--

"How much do you want to guess your body has left, hm?" Boaran says, obviously feeling exceptionally good about himself. "Hours? Minutes, maybe? I'm telling you, your mate is going to come back to find you dead when I'm done with you. And there's nothing either of you can do about it."

John gasps for a few moments, willing himself to stay conscious in this dream, if only for the sake of his real body. "And I'm- telling you... you're wrong," he manages. "I have... faith, in Fawnlock. I know he can- do this."

Boaran laughs. "You are far too confident for your own good," he says in an amused manner. "I think I like that. Makes it easier to get things over with." He drags his claw further down John's face, his neck, and to his shoulder. "So. Shall we end this?"

\--

It was only mere moments until Fawnlock heard Boaran chuckle again. His anger clouded his judgment as he drew closer to the demon. He hated the idea of being so close to the source of his mate's misery, and yet not being able to do anything about it. Fawnlock began to weigh his options if he went at Boaran now. But as soon as he heard another growl, Fawnlock stepped back, kicking a loose small rock from behind his heel until it hit the side of the cave wall. Instinctively, he froze and kept wide eyes on Boaran.

The sound caused Boaran's ears to twitch, and his chuckles turned into a low, menacing growl. His claws stilled, and although they were still connected to the ground, he didn't scratch at it. Even though he was still asleep, something told him that he was getting unwanted disturbance.

\--

Before Boaran does anything else, he freezes in place, his claw still on John's shoulder. John, who was expecting another stab like last time, is confused as to why the demon has stopped. He has just said that he wants to kill him, so why not get it over with? He glances up at the demon, surprised to see that Boaran is looking around and sniffing the air.

"Well well," Boaran says, letting go of John. "Looks like we're not alone in this little fantasy of ours."

John's eyes open wide. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Boaran leans down again, licking at the wound he has left on John with his claw; John hisses in pain. "It means, dear inukom, that your mate is even stupider than I thought. Either that, or someone has just found my cave and has made curiosity about to kill them."

"Don't you dare!" John exclaims, despite the throbbing pain in his stomach. He can't let Boaran win this. Not if whoever is in his cave happens to be Fawnlock.

With a wicked grin, Boaran places his hand on John's forehead. "Hang on for a second, dear," he says, and John can see him fading from his sight. Shit, Boaran is making him wake up, isn't he? "I'll be right with you."

\--

The low growl coming from Boaran kept Fawnlock rooted to the ground. He felt petrified with fear, and began to regret even stepping foot inside the cave. Fawnlock knew he should have attempted to hide, but he was too scared to do much of anything.

With another growl, Boaran slowly opened his eyes, now retracting his hand, slashing at the ground as he did so. His back was sort of stiff, but he paid it no mind. What was on his mind, however, was finding out who had disturbed his slumber, and interrupted his attempt to murder the inukom.

Fawnlock stood and watched Boaran rise from his sleep. It was at this moment he began to think that perhaps it was for the best. Boaran had no way of torturing or killing his mate now that he was awake. Now, all that Fawnlock had to do was worry about himself.

Boaran shook his head vigorously before letting out a low, rumbling growl. He looked around the cave, slowly getting used to the darkness, and trying to find the source of his problems. A part of him wanted it to be an innocent critter so that he could have a light snack before continuing with his little mission. However, he wasn't entirely opposed to finding the prince there either, and was pleasantly surprised to come face to face with none other than the harina himself.

The moment Boaran and Fawnlock locked eyes, Fawnlock gave him a glaring look. " _I warned you to release your hold on my mate._ "

At that, Boaran only grinned. " _Yes, well, there is not much you can do about it now, is there?_ " he said, his voice deep and menacing. " _I'm guessing your precious little mate has only mere minutes left to live._ "

Fawnlock didn't even blink at Boaran's taunting. " _Perhaps, but mark my words; I will avenge him._ "

" _Oh, by all means,_ " Boaran said, shrugging one shoulder. " _As long as you're given the proper motivation. And that..._ " He sniffed the air, and then grimaced. " _And that your soul will become mangled. It was truly disgusting to hear you had picked an inukom for a mate, let alone bond with one._ "

At that, Fawnlock's fur began to bristle. " _Don't even bother placing judgment on me. After all, you went and bonded with a vouk, of all things._ "

" _At least my bond was with someone of the same species,_ " Boaran responded, loving the anger that was obviously building up in Fawnlock. " _You, on the other hand, are a whole other case. Has it honestly not occurred to you how unnatural and revolting your choices with this thing have been so far?_ "

" _No. Because you're wrong._ " Fawnlock told Boaran firmly.

Boaran's disgusted face melted into a smirk. " _Oh? Then pray tell, what in the world possessed you to let an inukom have its way with you?_ " he asked, still finding Fawnlock's anger highly amusing.

" _Something you wouldn't be able to understand; love._ " Fawnlock said.

When he heard that, Boaran's smirk softened slightly, and he raised his eyebrows all-knowingly. " _Is that so?_ " he said, taking a step closer to Fawnlock. " _And how would you know?_ "

Fawnlock stood his ground in a mixture of fear and determination. " _Because you're a demon. You are capable of nothing but anger, hatred and everything that is dark and cruel._ "

" _Clever one,_ " Boaran replied, raising his hand to show off his claws in a threatening way. " _But what do you think fuels that anger and hatred in the first place, hm? How would I know where to target your weakest spot if those were the only emotions I could ever possess?_ "

The statement only confused Fawnlock. He gave a slight shrug, " _I already said you were cruel. Just because you recognise an emotion, doesn't necessarily mean you can feel it._ "

" _You are even stupider than I thought_ ," Boaran said as he crept even closer, wanting to pin Fawnlock against the nearest cave wall if he could. " _I can see why you value the inukom so much; you obviously don't know any better, if this is how you think._ "

This time, Fawnlock did take a step back from Boaran. The concept the demon was trying to imply was lost on Fawnlock. He had been told all his life that demons were lesser beings, because all they could feel was hate. But upon further reflection, Fawnlock began to realise that not only were demons once voji, but they were possibly even more emotional than most. " _Are you... trying to say you honestly felt, something for Wolfiarty?_ " He asked.

" _Something? **Something**?_ " Boaran snarled as he grabbed Fawnlock's neck, pushing him against a wall. He huffed in a rage, his already mad eyes practically glowing. " _What I felt for Wolfiarty - what I still feel for him - is worth more than you and your petty little mate can ever hope to achieve!_ "

The moment Boaran grabbed him, Fawnlock held the arm that had his neck. He began to tremble from head to toe, scared of what the demon would do to him. Fawnlock struggled to breathe, but he continued to look at Boaran straight in the eyes. " _W- wrong._ "

Despite his rage, Boaran grinned again. " _You're right_ ," he said, " _because you won't know that until your mate is finally dead. And when that happens, you'll know. You'll know how much you've missed and what you should have said and what it should have known from you. You know how it works. It'll haunt you._ " At this point, Boaran had started baring his teeth. " _And you'll live through every day wishing you hadn't taken it for granted. Sound about right to you?_ "

Fawnlock knew, alright. He knew that if John were to die, he would take a part of his soul with him. And when that happened, he would be left with a wound that would never heal. Once two beings were bonded, a broken tie was considered catastrophic. Just then, the timing of Boaran's attack began to make sense. " _You... waited._ "

Boaran's grin widened, to the point where he looked completely mad. " _Lucky me_ ," he growled. " _Of course I knew you had bonded, you imbecile. It was the only way to make this as painful for both of you as possible. You deserve to know how it feels to have your soul ripped apart, sweet prince. And to be wrapped with guilt and dread for as long as you live._ "

The initial fear Fawnlock felt in Boaran's presence morphed into anger. He released his grip on the arm and let loose a burst of magic towards the demon. As soon as he did that, Fawnlock noticed his magic wasn't as powerful as he had hoped.

Although he had expected some kind of an attack from Fawnlock, Boaran was genuinely surprised to find that the harina's magic barely left a scratch on him. He did release his grip, however, but only because he was so baffled by the lack of power. "That's it?" He cackled. " _If this is all you have, then I can see why your little protection spells aren't working as well as you hoped._ "

Fawnlock scrambled away from Boaran, though he really didn't have anywhere further to run.

Boaran was about to chase after Fawnlock, but stopped himself midway when he remembered that the prince was not his target. Instead, he beat his fist against a cave wall, causing it to crack. " _Just you wait, prince!_ " he roared. " _You'll feel it soon enough!_ "

As Boaran yelled after him, Fawnlock felt even more terrified. He felt weak for running, but he also saw it as a better chance of survival. Fawnlock slid down the mountain rocks as quickly as he could. Once he was sure he had reached the bottom, he found the nearest tree and hid behind it. Fawnlock sat in the dark forest, catching his breath as he tried to calm the pounding in his chest.


	22. Chapter 22

It was at this moment, Fawnlock knew he had failed John. There was no doubt in his mind that Boaran would get his way. Not just because he had been arrogant, but also because he was a coward. And now John would have to pay the price. Fawnlock drew his legs close to his chest and sat in the dark and cursed forest and wallowed around in his guilt.

Once Fawnlock was out, Boaran huffed angrily before settling back down on the ground with a pleased grin on his face. Even though he was still filled with rage, he managed to fall asleep once more, and quickly began his search for the inukom.

Thankfully, the thing is apparently so weak that it could barely stay awake, so finding it is relatively easy compared to the other times. Boaran seeks the inukom out quickly, and when he does find it, he instantly corners it before squeezing its shoulder hard enough to crush it.

"Now then," he says, "where were we?" He pauses, absorbing the pained expression on the inukom's face, and then continues. "Oh, and perhaps I should mention, your mate paid me a visit."

The inukom snaps its eyes open, and Boaran can see the colour drain from its face; how pitiful. "What did you do to him?" it asks.

Boaran chuckles. "You know, the funny thing is, I didn't actually do anything to him. Not exactly," he replies as he digs two claws into the inukom's shoulder, wanting to elicit that little grunting sound he loves so much. He gets what he wants. "I threatened him, certainly, but he's not my problem. No, he left."

"Left?" the inukom echoes between its panting; oh that's just adorable how it thinks it can relieve the pain. "Left, how? What did you do?"

"I believe I convinced him that he was fighting a lost cause," Boaran responds. "He knows you're dying, and yet he didn't do anything to me. Didn't even try - well, save for the one bit of magic he threw against me, but that was to save himself. I mean, I don't want to jump to conclusions, but I think your precious mate has given up on you."

There's something so fascinating about an inukom's face, Boaran has found out. This one in particular has somehow managed to go from a horrified expression to a painful one and now a disappointed one in mere seconds. It's actually kind of intriguing. "I don't believe you," the inukom then says determinedly. "Fawnlock- he wouldn't just- give up on me like that."

Boaran grins. "I'm still here, aren't I?" he says before injecting all his claws into the inukom's shoulder, enjoying the sounds it's making and the way it's struggling. "He didn't do anything. He knows you're doomed. He's not even going to try and help you." He digs his claws deeper, until he can feel it scraping against a bone. The inukom screams. "You're all alone, and you're all mine now."

\--

As it turned out, finding the cursed tree was much easier than Vixene had expected. True, it still took her a long time, but she had anticipated wearing herself out in search for it. And yet she had found it sooner than anticipated, which was a big plus. Now, climbing it, that was a whole other case, as it seemed that the curse had spread out even into the tree's branches and leaves. Regardless, Vixene had persisted, knowing that there was a life at stake, and while she didn't really know John all that well, she did not want to have the responsibility of his death on her shoulders.

She took it slowly, knowing that just a single false move could potentially stun her if not kill her. She could feel herself getting weaker as she climbed higher, but she was she had set a goal, and she was going to reach it.

Once she finally reached the fruit, she wasted no time and stuck the blade into it. There was an odd sound as she did so, not unlike a high-pitched shriek, but she paid it no mind. Instead, she watched as the juice spread over the blade almost in spurts, until it leaked off. Vixene carefully retracted the blade, and then hopped down from the tree, despite being very high up. She then set out to find Fawnlock and hopefully Boaran's cave.

Paying mind to the ground and the blade, Vixene decided to keep her eyes on both while instead using her nose to smell Fawnlock out. After all, a being with a mixed scent would be easy to find among all those dead plants. Sure enough, she eventually caught his scent, surprised to find that he was relatively close.

She followed the scent, and then paused when she realised that Fawnlock wasn't in any cave, but outside behind a tree. Vixene tilted her head in confusion and approached him. She became even more confused when she saw that he had curled in on himself, but wasn't in any visible pain.

" _Fawnlock?_ " she said, standing over him and looking him over, trying to figure out what was going on. " _What are you doing out here?_ "

The moment he heard Vixene's voice, Fawnlock lifted his head to her. " _I found Boaran's cave... but I awoke him. I tried to fight him, but my powers are drained. So... So I ran._ " He admitted.

Vixene frowned. " _You do realise that you're not the one he wants to murder, right?_ " she pointed out. " _So even if you did wake him, you probably weren't in any danger._ "

" _Yes, I realise that, but you weren't there. I saw the rage behind his eyes. He was so crazed, there was no way of telling what he would have done to me._ " Fawnlock snapped.

" _So you just... ran,_ " Vixene said. " _You could've bought time, been a distraction. Since he was awake, that would've made him less dangerous to John. Now he's probably attacking again, and here you are, curled up and feeling sorry for yourself!_ "

" _I know it was a stupid and impulsive thing to do._ " Fawnlock said as he looked back to his knees. " _But there's no helping it. I can't go against Boaran. Not here, and not without my magic._ "

" _Fine,_ " Vixene huffed. " _Go ahead and be a coward, then. I guess it's up to me to save your mate. I think he'll love to hear that. That you just gave up on him._ "

Fawnlock shot a glare at Vixene. " _And just how are you going to do that?_ "

Vixene presented the blade, which was somehow still drenched in the fruit's juice. " _Creep inside the cave, be careful not to wake Boaran up, and stab him with this,_ " she said plainly. " _I thought that was obvious._ "

Fawnlock looked at the blade in awe. " _I can't believe it... You actually found the tree?_ " He asked as though he couldn't believe it.

" _No, I just found a really good lake to put the blade in,_ " Vixene said and rolled her eyes. " _Of course I found the tree you idiot. Now are you going to continue to sit here and wallow and disappoint your mate, or do you want to do something about the jasan?_ "

Immediately, Fawnlock's faith was restored. He felt better with the deadly weapon in their posession. He stood from the forest floor and gave Vixene a nod. " _Let's send that demon straight to Yamahvan._ "

" _That's more like it,_ " Vixene said, now sporting a proud grin. " _How about a little role reversal? You do the stabbing, I'll be the distraction,_ " she said as she carefully handed the blade over to Fawnlock.

Fawnlock took the blade and gave Vixene his own smile. " _Alright then. Follow me._ " He said as he turned back towards the cave. Fawnlock could still hear Boaran's deep breathing. There was no doubt that he was attacking John. The guilt stung him, but he continued to press on. They both reached the edge of the slope and began to climb to the mouth of the cave as quietly as they could manage.

There was something about seeing Boaran up close that was so much more frightening than just seeing his image in a dream. Even so, Vixene followed Fawnlock, knowing only somewhat what they would be up against. And although she wasn't as good in the sensing department as Fawnlock was, she could tell that he was fighting some kind of inner battle, most likely concerning his mate. Well, she would have to give him that; at least he was aware of how much of a coward he'd been.

Once inside the cave, Fawnlock carefully inched closer to the slumbering demon. He made sure to lift his feet so he wouldn't kick up any rocks this time. And without making a single sound, he drew towards Boaran with caution.

Vixene kept up with Fawnlock, always looking down on her feet just in case any rocks were loose. After all, even he tiniest noise could be enough to wake up the demon. So she simply tiptoed around him, ever careful of any additional sounds.

She froze in her tracks, however, when the demon began to move. Vixene watched as he reached out a gigantic hand and began clawing at the ground. A low rumble could be heard from him, and soon it morphed into a dark chuckle. At the same time, his hand had picked up a small rock and was now crushing it. Vixene swallowed nervously, now a bit worried about what Fawnlock's mate was going through. If this was what Boaran was doing in his sleep, it could only mean that it was infinitely worse in the dream.

The chuckle sent an unpleasant shiver down Fawnlock's spine. A great anger sparked through him as he lifted the blade. Now that Boaran was asleep, Fawnlock showed no sign of fear or hesitation. He lifted the dagger up and above Boaran's back. He gave Vixene a small glance before he took in a small breath and plunged the knife into his shoulder.

Just a few more seconds. If the inukom fades in this dream, then it will leave its body in reality before it wakes up. The thought makes Boaran laugh maniacally. Finally, he will have his revenge. The inukom lies beneath him, thrashing and screaming, obviously on the brink of dying, and Boaran loves it. He wants to watch the life drain out of it, and he only wishes he could witness the beauty of this process in real life. But this is more than enough.

Suddenly, he feels as though something is amiss. His grip on the inukom is loosening, and it seems as though his strength is fading. Oh no. Something is happening to his own body. Boaran curses, hits the inukom right in the face, and then leaves the dream, fully intending to return and finally, finally finish what he started.

Boaran woke up sharply, much faster than usual, and no time passed before he realised why that was. Something had been impaled in his shoulder, and for some reason, whatever it was, it was spreading some kind of pain through his veins. He instantly filled with rage, his eyes glowing with fury. With an echoing roar, he stood up, swinging one arm in the direction of the nearest wall, somehow managing to slash it.

Fawnlock immediately pulled away, releasing his grip on the blade and leaving it inside the back of Boaran's shoulder. He watched as Boaran made his mark on the cave wall. Fawnlock couldn't understand why the poison hadn't taken its effect. He had been lead to believe that it was instantaneous. So he was shocked when that wasn't the case.

Vixene jumped back with a gasp when she saw the ferocity in Boaran's eyes, as well as the fact that he was actually still standing despite the poisonous blade. It didn't make any sense for him to still be functioning with the thing lodged in his shoulder.

Whatever was going through his body was making Boaran's eyesight blurry, and he couldn't properly distinguish what was going on around him. Which only made him that much angrier. He stomped around, trying to find the being that had stabbed him, only to find one of his old comrades standing right next to him. He frowned, and despite the flickering in his eyes, he focused on her. " _You,_ " he snarled.

The moment he said that, Fawnlock looked directly at Vixene. " _He knows you?_ " He asked. Only now did Fawnlock realise that Vixene could have ulterior motives for wanting to kill Boaran other than to help him and his mate. And it made him a little uneasy.

Taking a tentative step backwards, Vixene swallowed, trying not to make the fact that she was practically paralysed with fear too obvious. " _Yes,_ " she admitted, " _and for good reason. I used to be partners with him and Wolfiarty._ "

Hearing Vixene's clarification only made Fawnlock more confused. She didn't appear to be a demon to him. " _Partners?_ " He repeated.

Vixene was growing more and more terrified with each passing moment, especially with the way Boaran was looking at her. " _I'm good at sneaking around, and they took it to their advantage,_ " she replied, and then shot Fawnlock a small glance. " _Where do you think I learned the spell to become inukom?_ "

Fawnlock didn't know how to feel now that he knew he had used a demonic spell. He didn't have much time to reflect upon it as he gazed upon Boaran.

Boaran began stomping his way towards Vixene, each step heavier than the last; it was clear that he had to make an effort to keep moving. " _And now here you are,_ " he growled between large breaths, " _helping out one of our old main targets._ " He raised an arm; his claws ready to slash again. " _Wolfiarty would... be furious._ "

Seeing the claws made Vixene wish she had worked out some kind of an escape strategy, but as it was, she was so scared that she felt as if her mind was frozen. " _Well, he's- he's not here anymore, now is he?_ " she responded, trying to sound at least a bit levelheaded.

" _No,_ " Boaran said darkly. " _And now, neither will you._ " And with that, Boaran slashed at Vixene with all his might, despite the massive pain he was in.

" _Vixene!_ " Fawnlock exclaimed just before he saw her collapse to the ground. He felt a mixture of anger and horror ignite inside him as he saw red coat the cave's wall. He pushed all thoughts and questions of Vixene being a demon or not. Instead he only thought of her safety. So Fawnlock gave a growl and threw his magic in Boaran's direction.

Boaran felt something come into contact with him, but he was unsure of what it could be. He was beginning to feel numb, and wondered how much more he could do before he left. He turned to where he thought he had seen a green light. Once he saw the prince, he felt the fury bubbling in him again. " _Why can't you lot just go already!_ " he roared, practically chomping the words out. " _It's not- as if you can save it. Your mate._ "

Fawnlock felt nothing but anger towards the demon. " _It was you who couldn't save your mate!_ " He exclaimed, " _But I will save mine!_ " In that moment, Fawnlock pulled together as much energy and magic as he could and directed it towards Boaran.

The blow wasn't even that strong, and still it sent Boaran tumbling to the ground. That must be it, then. If he wasn't even able to ward off a simple, pathetic harina spell, then he was pretty much done for. And yet, he somehow still had enough energy for one last chuckle. " _By now... your mate is nothing but... a bony mush,_ " he managed, his voice deep and weak. " _You'll be lucky... if you can touch it, without breaking it to pieces._ "

At this point, Fawnlock was sick of hearing Boaran's taunting. Knowing he was close to death, he walked over to him and ripped the knife out from the demon's shoulder. Without a single hesitation, he stabbed Boaran again through his chest. " _Go to Yamahvan already._ " He hissed through his teeth.

It was probably the last thing Boaran saw, and although he had been expecting it, he couldn't feel a thing. He more or less was aware of the fact that the prince had stuck something into him again, but his body was so numb that no pain came from it. Because of that, he was more than willing to leave his body now.

There was something so peaceful about it; not to mention he would finally be relieved of the guilt and pain of losing his mate. With a crooked grin on his face, Boaran accepted the end, already looking forward to seeing Wolfiarty again.

Fawnlock stood and immediately turned away to tend to Vixene. He drew to her side and kneeled in the growing pool of blood. Fawnlock knew there was nothing he could do with Vixene in this condition. So he propped her up and held her as gently as he could. " _Vixene... We did it, he's gone._ " He said softly.

Vixene's only response was to smile slightly. She didn't even trust herself to open her eyes; not yet, at least. She was thankful that she hadn't just been left to rot, as she had expected. After a few moments, she gathered the energy to speak. " _Too bad- body pain doesn't- fade like magic does,_ " she said in a cracked voice.

At that, Fawnlock wanted nothing more than to try and heal Vixene. Except he knew he couldn't, so he didn't try to. " _It- It'll be over soon. I'm here._ " He reassured her in a trembling tone. " _I'm sorry I can't heal you._ "

Despite her pain, and her life fading with each breath she took, Vixene managed a small giggle. " _I didn't- take you as- as a very compassionate type_ ," she said. " _And you're- absolutely rubbish- at protecting. Deal's off._ "

Fawnlock gave a small scoff of a laugh, even as he watched her struggle. " _I know, I know, I'm sorry. You've done nothing but help me... And yet I couldn't help you._ "

" _Well... you murdered Boaran,_ " Vixene said, now opening her eyes just to get one last look at Fawnlock. " _That's- something. Think I can... go safely to- Zerukom now._ "

A small smile reappeared on Fawnlock's face. " _Yes. Thank you, for everything. Go now, and rest."_ He told her gently.

Vixene wanted to nod in agreement, but couldn't. So instead, she just closed her eyes and relaxed in Fawnlock's grip, allowing her spirit to leave her.

Fawnlock felt Vixene's body become heavy as she finally left their realms. It was only then that he stood up from the cave floor and began to carry her body out from the cave. He refused to allow Boaran's tomb become Vixene's. It didn't matter if they had been partners or not. Fawnlock thought of Vixene as a friend, after all.

Carefully, Fawnlock carried Vixene's body down the slope of the mountain. Though it was difficult, he carried her lifeless frame until he was near the edge of the darkened forest. There he found a tree to place her body underneath. Fawnlock only lingered for a moment before he turned to make his way towards home.

\--

John woke up. That was a huge surprise in and of itself, since every time Boaran attacked, he usually jolted awake and then felt massive pain all over. This time, however, he simply opened his eyes like he normally would under any other circumstances.

He still felt exhausted, and there was a throbbing in his head and chest, but there were no signs of the pain he had gone through earlier. Hell, even the hallucinations were gone. It was almost as if nothing had even happened, and that John had simply lost too many hours of sleep. Or was hung-over. Or both.

\--

After leaving Vixene, Fawnlock bathed in the nearest river to clean off most of the blood. He did so relatively quickly, because he knew he had to get back to John as soon as possible. On the way, he picked a few berries. If there were any chance John was still alive, he would need his strength.

Once Fawnlock set eyes on the cottage, he felt a sense of dread. For he wondered what he would see inside. He approached the cottage and opened the door. He crossed the room and approached the bed. Fawnlock gave a small sigh of relief.

John was obviously weak, but he was alive. And that was all that mattered to him. He presented John with the berries he picked in the forest. He didn't even know if John even had the strength to reach for them, let alone eat them. Still he showed them to him. "Here, eat these." Fawnlock gently instructed.

As soon as John set his eyes on Fawnlock, relief washed over him. So much that he felt like he had actually been struck. "Fawn--" he managed to breathe just before the spirit spoke to him first. Which was probably a good thing, seeing as John didn't really feel like talking too much. He just wanted to make sure that Fawnlock was actually there. Still, he slowly lifted his hand and took the berries, but didn't do anything with them just yet. "You... okay?"

It broke Fawnlock's heart to hear John murmur such a thing. Even in his condition, John was still concerned about him rather than himself. "I'm fine, John." He responded. Just then he realised that he still had a small portion of Vixene's blood on his chest, which clumped his fur together in an unnatural manner. He looked back at John with a sorrowful expression. "It's... It's not mine."

John reached out his other arm, trying to make it clear to Fawnlock that he wanted physical proof that he wasn't dreaming. Only when he did that did John notice the blood on his chest, and he felt a small panic rise up in him before he saw that there was no wound there. This had to have come from something else.

At first, John expected it to have been from the bear, seeing as how Fawnlock had obviously succeeded in getting rid of it. But there was something about his expression that made John feel a bit uneasy. "Wh- what... happened?" he managed; feeling like his voice was going to give out if he said anything more.

"I will tell you, once you eat. You are weak." Fawnlock said firmly.

Honestly, in the span of the few seconds they had spoken, John had forgotten about the berries. He looked at them in his hand and slowly brought them up to his mouth, picking out one at a time. As he did this, he was going to reply with something akin to 'there, doing it', but didn't think he would even be able to at this point.

Now that John was eating, Fawnlock felt more relaxed. He sat down on the bed, right next to John but he didn't choose to lament straight away. Instead he paused to collect his thoughts, looking off in a different direction if only for a few moments. Fawnlock shook his head slightly before turning towards John and telling him the events that had happened. He told his mate of all the facts, and didn't bother to tell them in any delicate manner. "I placed her body under a tree, bathed in the river, and came back here." He concluded.

For some reason, John had a very hard time taking in everything Fawnlock was saying. Not because he was still extremely weak - though that certainly didn't help - but more because the more Fawnlock spoke, the more it began sounding like a fairy tale of some sort. Especially the part with the poisonous fruit. When Fawnlock mentioned Vixene's death, John looked at him apologetically, and gently put his hand over Fawnlock's, just barely mustering a small "sorry" in response.

The moment John touched him, Fawnlock simply looked at his hand. "I know I couldn't help her, but I couldn't have done it without her. So at least she didn't go in vain."

In a way, John was still trying to take in the fact that Vixene had died for him, and he didn't even know her. Well, okay, maybe it hadn't been that dramatic, but she had still died while trying to kill the beast that was torturing him. "She was... good."

"Yes, she was." Fawnlock agreed. He then handed John the rest of the berries he had picked. "Now, eat these. I'll go out and fetch more." He told John, partly because he was concerned for John's health, and also because he wanted to drop the subject.

John complied; surprised to find that the berries were ridiculously refreshing, though they were small. However, when Fawnlock mentioned going out, he tightened his hold on his hand. "No."

Fawnlock only blinked at John, confused but determined. "You need your strength, John. So you need food and sleep."

In mere moments, John had lifted himself up into a sitting position (ignoring the headrush it resulted in - damn it, he was not going to faint again!) and wrapped his arms around Fawnlock, though his grip was slack. "Stay," he all but whispered. "I'm... worried."

When John wrapped his arms around him, Fawnlock melted into the touch. Though he was still confused as to why John was acting this way. He tried to reassure him. "There's nothing to be afraid of." He murmured.

It was clear that Fawnlock was oblivious, John could sense that, but he still persisted. "I know," he mumbled back. "But... just got... you back." Apparently sleep deprivation made John incredibly clingy. Something he would sort out another time.

Immediately, Fawnlock understood. "...Alright. I will stay. If only, until you sleep." He said before placing a gentle kiss on John's head.

Although John still wasn't fond of the idea of Fawnlock leaving, he was okay with that answer. Just as long as he would have him close for now. John nodded slowly. "Thank you," he managed before lying back down on the bed, but always making sure that some part of him was still touching Fawnlock.

After a short amount of time, Fawnlock couldn't help himself. He took his hand away and settled down next to John. Though he couldn't bring himself to touch John. He only stared at the ceiling and listened to his mate's breathing.

Instinctively, John curled up next to Fawnlock and was about to wrap himself around him when he suddenly felt like that would be unwelcome on Fawnlock's part. Just when John thought he would be able to relax and properly fall asleep, something else began bothering him. He looked Fawnlock over, and tired and weak as he was, he could tell something was wrong. "You... you're not... fine."

"Go to sleep, John." Fawnlock told him.

John would have argued. He would have kept the conversation going and made Fawnlock tell him what was the matter. But in this state, all John could do was feel disappointed, and a bit guilty for making Fawnlock stay behind when he obviously didn't want to be there. So, his apparently drained mind told him, in order not to make him feel uncomfortable, John shuffled away a bit to give him some space.

In retrospect, Fawnlock realised that might have been a bit rude. Except Fawnlock was more concerned about John's well being than his own. So he felt justified. A few moments passed and Fawnlock turned away from John to curl into himself a bit. Before he could help himself, he was drifting off to sleep along with John.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter to go!!


	23. Chapter 23

It only took a couple of days for John to regain his strength, but Fawnlock was still determined to take care of him. Even if he doing so in short intervals. Fawnlock would take his time out in the forest more often, and spend his time reflecting inwardly rather than with his mate.

After a walk in the forest, Fawnlock returned with his choice of berries and nuts for John. He opened the door and nearly flew into a panic when he didn't find John in his bed. He released his held breath as soon as he saw John sitting in his chair.

It was such a relief to actually be able to move again, after what had felt like weeks of torture from the bloody bear. Still, John wasn't able to do anything too drastic just yet, although he was able to walk around without having to worry about passing out or something. The chair was a nice alternative from the bed anyway, so that was something.

He had somewhat gotten used to Fawnlock constantly going out and not really sticking around all that much, but it still bothered him that he was making no effort to tell John what was wrong. But then again, Fawnlock could take his own time with that. After what he had just gone through, John couldn't blame him. So when John saw him standing close, he offered a soft smile as a greeting. "Hey there," he said, "back to feed me?"

Though Fawnlock was glad John was walking around, he was upset by the small scare. "Obviously." He said as he closed the door. "I have the berries you like, as well as some nuts. Are you sure you should be out of bed?" Fawnlock asked as he presented John's food.

"Ta," John responded as he took the food, and then looked at Fawnlock, curious as to why he was so worried, it seemed. "Well, I have to get out of there some day, right? Might as well start early and take it in slow steps."

"Right, I suppose so." Fawnlock responded. After handing John all the berries and nuts, he turned away immediately. "I'm going back to the forest. I'll return shortly."

"Now wait just a sodding minute," John said right away and stood up from the chair, the food still in his hand. "Look, I know you want some time alone after what happened. I get that. I know what it's like. But I'm starting to feel like you're actually trying to avoid me, and making an effort to... to not be near me at all."

"I'm not avoiding you, John. I just want some time to myself." Fawnlock said, not knowing how utterly uncaring he sounded while doing so.

Something about the way Fawnlock said that made John feel like he had been kicked in the gut. It really was like Fawnlock was trying to distance himself from him, as if he had found something more interesting in the forest. Or that the Boaran incident had sparked some kind of new feeling that he wanted more of. God knew John knew what that was like. Still.

"Right," he then replied, looking down at the berries and nuts in his hand. "You do that, then. I'll just... hang around here, I guess," he added, duly ignoring the sting of rejection that was currently coursing through him.

Fawnlock was hit by the sense of disappointment and sadness that radiated from John, which only irritated and confused him. Instead of leaving, he challenged John, "Has it ever occurred to you that the forest is where I belong? That perhaps I've grown tired of trying to live a life in these confined walls? I am a spirit of the forest, John."

Then, and only then, did it hit John how selfish he had been. He should have expected this. After all, Fawnlock was completely right. He was a forest spirit, and not a human being, as John often found himself forgetting. Of course he would get tired of this eventually. All this time, John had thought that Fawnlock was staying on his own accord, when really; he was only here because John made him. Maybe Mrs Hudson had been right all along. Maybe he had taken Fawnlock away from his home; where, deep down, he wanted to be.

"No, it hasn't," John admitted, trying not to let his shame become too prominent, in case Fawnlock could sense it. "I honestly thought you'd pretty much settled down here. But yeah, I get it. This isn't really where you want to live. That's fine, it's- all fine."

After John reassured him that Fawnlock had gotten his point across, he gave a small nod. "Good. Then I'll take my leave." He said as he turned away.

Not having much else to add, John let Fawnlock go without saying another word. He knew he should have reasoned a bit; like how Fawnlock should have mentioned this earlier so that they wouldn't have to go through something like this, or that he wished he could give Fawnlock what he needed, but remained silent. He looked back at the berries in his hand, and with a small sigh, began picking at them to eat them.

In truth, Fawnlock had no idea where he belonged. He wanted desperately to be a part of John's life, ever since he had laid eyes on him. He had defied his customs and culture, even fought and killed to be with him. But after endangering their lives so much, Fawnlock wasn't sure if it was worth it. If he was truly worth it.

Fawnlock began to reflect on the idea that maybe it would be best for them to part ways. And this thought only became stronger day by day, as he walked through the forest. Today was no different. As he stood in the clearing, he thought about leaving and never returning, but something kept him from doing so.

Although the berries were fairly strong in taste, and the nuts just as chewy as one would like, John found no pleasure in eating them. Hell, he barely even realised that he was doing it in the first place. As he did so, he thought back to the first time Boaran had attacked him, and what he had said. Of course, Fawnlock hadn't said anything openly, and it had been clear in the past that he cared, but what if the damn demon had been right? What if Fawnlock had been better off without ever meeting him?

Instantly, John began feeling regret for having even come to the cottage in the first place. Or sought out Fawnlock to begin with. Maybe if he had just stayed in town, or ignored the creature in his trap... Maybe then, Fawnlock wouldn't be so miserable and distant now. Sure, he had said that he loved this life when John had questioned this first, but what if that had just been a way to calm him down? God. John had practically been holding him captive all this time without even realising it.

He should apologise somehow, and make it clear to Fawnlock that he was free to go if he wanted to. Because as much as John loved him (and he truly, truly did), he would be damned if he would be the source of his mate's misery. So perhaps letting him go would be the right thing. It tore John apart to think of it, and he hated the idea of losing the one person in his life that he had loved so much, but there it was.

As it turned out, Fawnlock didn't wander very far from the cottage. Instead, he sat in the small clearing between the forest and the cottage. He was conflicted, that much was evident. But the more he thought about it, the more sure he was about staying. It would make no sense for him to leave John. After what they had been through, Fawnlock began to see it as reassurance. They both had fought long and hard to gain what they currently had.

He was sure that if John hadn't thought he was worthy, he would have been tossed out long ago. John wouldn't have taught him his language. He wouldn't have kept him in his home. John wouldn't have fed him. Nor would he have had any interest in his culture, or try to impress his kind. John wouldn't have risked his life to save Fawnlock from Wolfiarty. Most of all, John wouldn't have shared his heart and his love.

While it was true that Fawnlock was a forest spirit, John had decided long ago that he wasn't going anywhere. So it was highly unlikely that Fawnlock would find himself far from his part of the forest. Upon reaching these conclusions, Fawnlock began to realise his awful choice in words. He wasn't sure what had possessed him to become so distant, but he knew he had to make it up to John.

As a roundabout apology, Fawnlock began to grow, pick and collect the various blades of glass and flowers surrounding him. The day grew longer still as he worked on John's gift. It wasn't until the sun was beginning to set that he stood from his sitting place. He walked towards the cottage, and opened the door. Fawnlock went inside with a shy expression on his face. "John...?" He called before walking through the door.

As the day drew on, John began feeling more and more like Fawnlock had honestly left him. Which was good, sort of, because then at least the spirit had followed his own will and not just stayed because John wanted him to. And yet, it broke John's heart to shatters to think that the one he had called his mate would just up and leave him like that. After everything they had been through together.

He thought back to those times as he made himself somewhat comfortable in bed again. He thought about young Fawnlock and their language barrier, their struggles to meet, Fawnlock's heldua, and just the overall fact that Fawnlock had accepted him as a mate. He smiled weakly, because as brokenhearted as he was, he had loved those times. If he saw Fawnlock again, he would have to thank him as well as apologise to him.

John was quickly snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the cottage door open, and he sat up in his bed, not really knowing what to expect. However, when he heard his name, he knew who it was. "Yeah, in here," he responded, feeling his stomach sink as he spoke. God, he wasn't sure he could actually go through with this now.

Fawnlock closed the cottage door and approached the bed. When he drew closer, he presented John his gift; two small woven sculptures. They were intricate, and both very distinguishable as both John and Fawnlock. "I wanted to apologise..."

When John saw the sculptures, he got a little confused. If this was all about Fawnlock wanting to leave, why make them? Maybe it was about leaving something behind that would remind John of him. Or something like that. Either way, John was touched, but still torn enough to only be able to look down for the moment. "Me too, actually."

"No, John. Allow me. I'm still sticking by what I've said before; I love this life. And I wouldn't want to trade it for the world." Fawnlock admitted.

Somehow still convinced that they were going to part ways, John expected Fawnlock to continue. So he slowly looked up at him, trying not to make it too obvious that dread and rejection were gnawing at him. "But...?"

Fawnlock looked confused. "But nothing." He said before sitting on the side of John's bed, "I might be a forest spirit, but I refuse to be anywhere else." Fawnlock placed the two sculptures on the nightstand beside the bed.

"Yeah, about that," John said awkwardly, making his best effort to keep eye contact. "Listen, I'm... sorry about this whole thing. About making you stay here, just because I wanted you to. Because, like you said, it's- it's not really where you belong."

At that, Fawnlock gave John a small heartbroken smile. He reached out to gently cup John's cheek. "John, wherever you are is where I belong. You're not making me stay anywhere. I'm here because I want to be." Fawnlock told him.

It was clear to John that Fawnlock was being honest, but he still wanted to elaborate. "It's just... With all those things you were saying earlier, I've realised how much of a dick I've been, keeping you in here. So, if..." God. "If you want to leave, then- you can."

"If I wanted to leave, then I would have done so already." Fawnlock said. "You've been nothing but kind and accepting of me, John."

"Well, you... have been going out more often and for a longer time than usual," John pointed out. "I thought maybe you were trying to distance yourself from me, or, I don't know, preparing to just go for good." He sounded ridiculously pathetic and needy, and he knew it. But this had been bothering him for a while, and especially throughout this day.

Fawnlock brushed his thumb along John's cheek. "For that, I'm sorry." He said softly just as his hand dropped away from John's face. "I'm not sure what's gotten into me."

Despite himself, John reached for Fawnlock's now free hand with his own and gently squeezed it. "Then you can talk to me," he told Fawnlock. "I get that you'd want some time alone, but you don't have to shut me out."

"Yes, alright." Fawnlock agreed with a small nod.

At that, John managed a small smile. "So... do you want to talk about it?" he carefully asked, in case Fawnlock needed more time to reflect on whatever was on his mind.

For a moment Fawnlock remained silent, unsure whether or not to divulge his thoughts. "Not entirely... I'm still unsure why I feel this way." He admitted.

"Feel how?" John asked. "I mean, you don't have to discuss it, but maybe if you told me what's wrong, I could help."

Fawnlock nodded. "I guess I've been feeling, angry and... guilty."

"Is this about Vixene?" John had to ask, although the answer probably should have been obvious.

"...Yes." Fawnlock replied.

Oh, how John knew that feeling. He gave Fawnlock's hand a reassuring squeeze before responding again. "Whatever you're thinking, it wasn't your fault."

Despite John's reassurance, the guilt only weighed on his heart further. "But she came to me for protection, John."

"And you did," John replied. "But neither of you could've known that Boaran was going to go on a rampage when you stabbed him. You have no one to blame but him."

The moment Fawnlock looked at John, he could sense an underlining familiarity in John's tone. "I suppose you're right..." He said in a wavering voice.

With his free hand, John gently cupped Fawnlock's face. "Battles always leave behind casualties, Fawnlock. No matter how small they are," he said. "And just because you happened to be there, it doesn't mean you're responsible for that. Unexpected things will happen."

There was no denying it now, "You... You've felt this before, haven't you?" Fawnlock asked.

John sighed, smiling sadly. "Yes," he admitted. "Loads of times. Haunted me for ages. Still does sometimes. I mean, you've seen my nightmare fits."

"I wasn't aware that's what they were about..." Fawnlock said softly.

"Well, I didn't exactly make a point to tell you about it either, so it's not that big a deal," John replied, gently running his thumb over Fawnlock's cheek. "But yes, I know exactly what you're going through, and it's perfectly normal."

Fawnlock could only nod solemnly. Even if he wasn't sure how "normal" it was to constantly feel so numb and vulnerable.

"Oh, Fawnlock," John breathed as he leaned in to lightly kiss Fawnlock on the lips. "It'll get better, I promise you. But not if you isolate yourself and keep it all bottled inside."

At that, Fawnlock gave John another small nod. "Alright. I understand." He responded before reaching for another kiss. Fawnlock hadn't been aware of how much he missed John's touch.

John gently kissed Fawnlock back, moving the hand on his face to the back of his neck for some leverage. He wanted to move closer, simply because he had been craving Fawnlock's touch for what felt like ages, but held back for now.

Because Fawnlock worried that John still didn't have his entire strength back, he only kissed him for a few seconds more. He stopped and pulled back slightly to speak to John, "Thank you... for being understanding."

"Any time, love," John replied, sliding his hand down Fawnlock's arm to meet his other hand. "So, are we okay?"

Fawnlock gave John a loving smile. "Yes."

"Good," John said with a smile of his own. "Because right now I feel like sleeping for a day or so, and I'd love it if you joined me. If just for a few hours."

A small chuckle came bubbling out from Fawnlock's throat. "Of course. I'd be more than happy to."

John chuckled, and lay down on the bed, moving over so that Fawnlock could settle down next to him. "Come on, then. I miss cuddling with my mate."

Immediately, Fawnlock climbed more onto the bed and closer to John. Once they were both lying down, Fawnlock wrapped his arms around John, and placed his head gently in the crook of John's neck. The comfortableness alone was relaxing, but he felt himself melting when he felt John's radiating heat and his wonderful scent.

Honestly, John found himself almost wanting to sob at the beauty of all this, especially considering how he had thought just moments ago that he would never get to do this again. He held Fawnlock close, finally getting the reassurance that he needed, and allowed himself to close his eyes and relax. "The sculptures are beautiful, by the way," he commented drowsily.

Fawnlock's smile widened at the compliment. "Thank you. I'm glad you like them." He said before giving out a small yawn.

"Of course I do," John said as he turned to kiss Fawnlock on the forehead. "Now I know you weren't as distant as I thought, if you were thinking of me while making them."

When John kissed him, Fawnlock couldn't help but squirm a little and flicked his tail. "That's exactly what I was doing. You know, while I was in that mood I had it in my head that I wasn't deserving of any of this. But then I came to realise that we wouldn't be where we are today if I wasn't. Which, in turn, made me realise how happy I've been with you. And that's how I know that there's no one else I'd rather be with." He said the last bit with a small, tired sigh.

All the dread and fear of rejection seemed to melt off John the more Fawnlock spoke. It broke his heart to think that Fawnlock had thought he didn't deserve him, but at least he had realised on his own how mad that was. John wasn't sure how he could even respond to that, so instead, he just tightened his hold on Fawnlock for a second. "Me neither," he then said, sounding more tired than he felt. But maybe that had something to do with the fact that he knew he would get some good, undisturbed sleep for once.

Once Fawnlock heard that, he took it as his cue to relax more in John's grip. He felt more reassured than ever of his relationship with John. Slowly, Fawnlock began to fade into unconsciousness.

\--

After their ordeals were over, and Fawnlock was sure John had his strength returned to him, he formed a small idea in his head. However, Fawnlock decided not to go through with it until the conditions were just right. So he waited until the sun had set over the horizon. And he continued to wait after John and himself had their dinner. It was just after John had cleaned and put away the dishes, and just before he began to settle down in his chair to read before turning in for the night.

Fawnlock had his eyes set outside the window, but he knew John's routine very well. He turned to John and spoke up. "John, I have something to show you."

John had just picked up his book and was approaching his chair when Fawnlock spoke. He looked at Fawnlock with a puzzled expression, noting how dark it was out. "Now? But it's getting pretty late," he said.

"Trust me, John." Fawnlock said just before walking towards the door. "The night air will do you some good."

With a small grin, John rolled his eyes. "Alright, alright," he said as he left the book on the chair for later. He walked over to where he usually hung his coat to put it on, all the while keeping an eye on Fawnlock. "So where are we going?"

"You'll see." Fawnlock said with a large grin on his face. He opened the door and turned towards John. "Just follow me." He said as he stretched out his hand towards John.

John took Fawnlock's hand and let himself be led outside. He shivered a bit when the chill hit him, but quickly got used to it as the two of them moved. He began wondering what on earth Fawnlock was up to. Normally when the spirit wanted to show him something, it was in broad daylight, and not like this.

They left the cottage behind, and began to set out into the forest. Fawnlock led John in the direction towards higher ground. The night air was slightly nippy, but it didn't bother Fawnlock too much. He continued to lead John along a small narrow trail that wound its way up a hillside.

There was really nothing to say at this point, as John was certain that if he asked again, Fawnlock wouldn't tell him where they were headed. Or why they were going there. So he just followed blindly, getting more and more curious with each step they took.

It took a bit longer than Fawnlock expected, but the both of them reached the top of the hill. Once they were far above the trees, they had the greatest view of the valley. More than that, the both of them had a clear and glorious view of the stars.

John had a sneaking suspicion that he had never been to this particular place, even after meeting Fawnlock and getting all the various forest sightseeing tours. That had to have explained why he was absolutely amazed by the sheer beauty of the view. He didn't know where to look; down to the valley, over the trees, or up at the stars. He ended up turning in all directions just to take in as much as he could, letting out a small, amused huff. "Wow..." he then breathed. "This is... This- This is..." Another huff.

Fawnlock looked at John with a large smile. He gave John a small squeeze of his hand. "Marvelous, isn't it?" He asked.

"It's brilliant," John replied, still staring in awe. "How did I live here so long without knowing this place has this kind of view? Even at night!"

At that, Fawnlock grinned ever further. "Well, that's why you have me." He said with a slight shrug.

John smiled, managing to look away from the scenery and at Fawnlock. "Yes, that's true," he said, running his thumb against Fawnlock's hand in his. "And I know this is going to sound extremely sentimental, but... I am so thankful for that."

"I am thankful, as well." Fawnlock said with a softer smile.

Softly chuckling through his nose, John turned to face Fawnlock, and took his other hand in his free one. "You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were going to propose to me," John said lightheartedly.

Fawnlock tilted his head slightly in mild confusion. "Propose?" He asked.

Oh, that's right. John hadn't exactly told Fawnlock all the usual things humans did when they were in love. "Ah, never mind," he said with a light giggle. "What's this all about, then?"

For a moment, Fawnlock simply blinked at John. "You sound as though I have an ulterior motive."

John raised his eyebrows slightly. He wasn't surprised, per se, but found it curious that a creature like Fawnlock would show him something like this without having something else in mind as well. "Not really," he said with a small shrug. "It's more the fact that I was brought up believing that if someone you love takes you to a wonderful place, something is going to happen or be said. But you just wanted some atmosphere, didn't you?"

"And someone to share it with." Fawnlock replied softly, just before planting a small kiss on John's cheek.

"Then I'm glad you picked me," John said, lifting one hand to gently trace the side of Fawnlock's face. "Because just look at you." He wasn't entirely sure what it was, but thought about blaming the soft moonlight for making Fawnlock's eyes shine like they were some sort of jewels. And his overall appearance, matching the natural scenery perfectly. "My beautiful mate."

Fawnlock felt a small warmth bloom in his cheeks at that. "Now you definitely sound extremely sentimental." He replied, though the smile never left his face.

John laughed. "Oh, shut up and just take the compliment," he said in an amused manner, lightly poking Fawnlock's cheek. "Besides, I'm telling the truth. You should know that."

"I know." Fawnlock said. He then gave John a soft kiss on his lips.

Gently kissing back, John began thinking about the situation, and found it funny how bizarre it was. It was like something out of a fantasy novel; he, a human, kissing his mate, a forest spirit, atop a large hill under the stars, with the most beautiful scenery around them to top it all off. John pulled back and smiled at Fawnlock. "And I love you, just to make that clear too," he said.

"You've always made that clear." Fawnlock said with a sure smile.

"Have I? That's good, because for a moment there, I was thinking maybe I didn't say it enough," John said teasingly, never wiping the large smile off his face. He then stepped closer and wrapped his arms around Fawnlock, resting his head on his shoulder. He felt almost overwhelmed with happiness, as he was not only feeling it himself, but he could sense it from Fawnlock as well.

In truth, Fawnlock didn't care for the scenery; he only wanted to be close and intimate with John. And now that he had found himself in this moment, he couldn't have asked for anything better. "I love you, too." Fawnlock told him.

John sighed contentedly, caressing Fawnlock's back and turning his head on his shoulder so that he could nuzzle his neck. It had been a while since they had hugged like this - aside from when they slept, but those were more cuddles than hugs - and thus John had no intention of letting to just yet.

Fawnlock couldn't even bother wiping the smile off of his face. He was in a state of pure bliss. Fawnlock didn't want this moment to end. He kissed the side of John's head, to let him know how much he adored him.

"So when do you think the next disaster is going to strike?" John asked playfully. "It is us, after all. We're always dealing with some kind of messes."

The statement roused a small chuckle from Fawnlock's throat. "That may be true, but we'll always be together to get through it."

John smiled. "And at least now we can both actually deal with it properly," he replied, kissing Fawnlock's neck. "We're both at our best when we're not alone."

"I fully agree with you." Fawnlock said with a small nod. "Next time we're both in peril, we'll manage things together."

"We'll have to," John said, backing away a bit so he could look at Fawnlock. "It'd really stink if one of us got killed, and then the other dropped dead as a result."

The smile Fawnlock had on his face was wiped off in a manner of seconds. He instantly remembered his lie, and decided to clear things up. "About that... John, I lied to you."

Seeing Fawnlock's smile disappear made John's own one fade as well. "What, about the soul thing?" he asked, feeling his heart grow a bit heavy. "But I can still sense-- at least, I think I can."

"John, it's not that our souls didn’t bond. I just exaggerated what would happen, should one of us go." Fawnlock tried to explain. "I knew that if the stakes were high enough, you wouldn't follow me."

John nodded slowly. "Then what's the truth?" he then had to ask.

Fawnlock tried not to outwardly express the numbing pain he felt in his heart. "The truth is... if one of us is gone, the other will live. Except, the one who lives on will only have half of their soul."

At that, John's eyes widened, and he swallowed nervously. "And the one left... Will they feel it?" he asked. "As in, more than usual, when you lose a loved one?"

"Yes." Fawnlock told him. "It feels as though a part of you is missing. It's exactly why voji are at the risk of becoming demons when their mate is gone. Emotions can be high and if they are bitter enough..." He trailed off as soon as he sensed how troublesome John felt.

John barely even registered what Fawnlock was saying, because his mind was going a mile a minute. If this was all true, then they had a hell of a problem; one that John had been very comfortable not to bring up until now. "But... I age faster than you do," he said, his expression almost painful. "It's- Even if nothing happens to either of us, we can't stop it. I'll go long before you do either way."

"I know... I know." Fawnlock said as he felt his heart beginning to break. "But I'll be fine, John. I promise." He told him as he placed his hand on John's face.

"You don't know that," John said, feeling his heart sting the more he thought about it. Fawnlock would feel miserable and empty, and would possibly grow too bitter to stop himself from hating everything. Almost like- like his brother. John internally groaned at himself for not having seen it sooner. Of course. Moosecroft wasn't just bitter and prejudiced and angry all the time because a human had killed his mate; the feelings were amplified because a part of him had gone with him!

"Just, l- look at Moosecroft," John then pointed out.

"Moosecroft avoided becoming a demon. And I reversed the effect before." Fawnlock reassured him.

"Yeah, but... I'd still be the cause of it all," John said sadly. "I hate that."

"John, I swear on my life that it won't even happen." Fawnlock told him in a firm voice.

John grew a grave impression. "Fawnlock, if you're implying what I think you are..." He groaned. "Oh, hell, I don't even know what's worse! You living the rest of your days literally with a part of you missing, or offing yourself after I die!"

"I never said that!" Fawnlock exclaimed, horrified that John would come to that conclusion. "I'm only saying that I won't become a demon. Not after all that has happened."

While it did calm John down to hear that, he still loathed the idea of leaving Fawnlock behind in this way. "I think this is the only time I will ever wish we were both the same species," he murmured as he looked down.

Fawnlock gave John a small, heartbroken smile while he tried to grab his gaze. "We've tried that, remember? It doesn't work." He said softly. "We'll be alright, John."

Reluctantly, John looked up again, but kept his head dipped. "I know," he replied. "But it doesn't mean either of us is ever going to stop thinking about it."

Of course they wouldn't stop thinking about it. Fawnlock knew how it felt. Part of the reason he wanted to be human was to shorten his lifespan. "I don't want to spend my days dwelling on the distant future, John." He told him. In an attempt to rid of the subject, Fawnlock simply drew closer and softly nuzzled John.

John's mind was still wrapped around the idea, and even though he knew it would take a while to actually happen, it still bothered him. Nonetheless, Fawnlock was right. They should be living in the moment. John nodded, his mouth quirking into the slightest hint of a smile. "Me neither, actually," he said. "Sorry for bringing it up."

"It's alright, John." Fawnlock said in a hushed voice. "It's natural to think of these things. I'm sorry for lying to you. And I guess I could have been more specific about all that bonding entails." He said with a hint of shame in his voice.

This time, John's smile momentarily did show up for a moment. "Yes, well, I think I should've thought more about the actual word," he said somewhat quietly. "I always assumed that was just what you called mating. So yeah. We're pretty much both gigantic idiots."

Fawnlock chuckled a little. "I guess so. You weren't wrong, though. It is a way for my kind to mate. It's just a bit more complex." He said with a slight shrug.

"That's true," John said, and finally fully smiled. "But you know, I don't regret it. Not just because of obvious sentimental reasons, but because, even though it'll eventually have some awful consequences, I still think it's bloody fantastic that our souls are actually one. And no metaphorical nonsense included."

Upon hearing John speak, Fawnlock felt his smile morph into a grin. "I'm glad. It's for those reasons, I don't regret it either." He agreed.

At that, John couldn't resist leaning in to give Fawnlock a small kiss. He brought his arms properly around him again as well, missing the earlier contact.

When Fawnlock felt John wrap himself around him, he embraced John and kissed him back. He was in an absolute blissful state. Happiness radiated from every part of him. Except, Fawnlock didn't want to settle for such a small kiss. Instead he reached for John's lips and deepened their kiss as soon as he began to pull away.

John honestly hadn't expected that, but welcomed it anyway, tightening his hold on Fawnlock as he let out a small sound of appreciation. His very being was practically jumping with joy, and he felt like he could honestly keep doing this forever. He could sense Fawnlock's immense happiness, which only made him more delighted.

After what seemed like ages, Fawnlock pulled away from John's lips. He couldn't hide the grin on his face as he spoke. "So much for the scenery..."

Grinning equally wide, John chuckled. He ran his hands down Fawnlock's back, placing them on his waist. "Aren't you technically a part of it, though?" he asked.

At that, a blush blossomed on Fawnlock's cheeks. "In a way, I suppose. From what I've been told, your kind is inherently similar to mine. So I guess that makes you a part of it as well." He mused.

Again it was clear to John just how beautiful everything about this moment was, despite their small shouting contest earlier. "There you are, then," he said, moving one hand up to lightly touch Fawnlock's face. "Two handsome blokes in a fantastic scenery." He laughed. "That sounds like a title of a really pretentious painting."

Fawnlock simply chuckled in response, still feeling the slight tingle of heat in his cheeks. "Be quiet and just kiss me again already." He commanded with a smirk.

"Cheeky one, aren't you?" John teased before complying, and leaning in once more to capture Fawnlock's lips.

The gentle push and pull of John's lips was incredibly pleasing to Fawnlock. He even felt himself humming just slightly. He pulled his fingers through John's hair, loving the feeling of the fine texture. Fawnlock was in a pure state of overwhelming happiness.

John pulled Fawnlock closer to him, his hands still on his waist, as he subconsciously leaned into Fawnlock's hand in his hair. He let out a small sound as well, just to let Fawnlock know that he liked what he was doing. And that, in case it wasn't already obvious, he was immensely happy to have him.

As much as he didn't want to, Fawnlock pulled away from John. Even though he enjoyed the feel of John's lips, the sensation of his fingers in his mate's hair, and the sounds he prompted from him, he decided he had his fill of the scenery. "I believe we should head back to the cottage." He suggested.

At that, John simply smiled. "Quite," he said with a nod, running one hand up Fawnlock's side as he did so. "We probably should've done that a while ago, actually."

"I believe we were a bit preoccupied." Fawnlock said with a slight chuckle in his throat. "Now come on, let's go home."

A new kind of warmth sparked within John when he heard Fawnlock say that. For a moment, he tried to recall if Fawnlock had ever called the cottage their home before. He had called it John's home, certainly, but not theirs. So by just uttering that one word, Fawnlock had somehow made John even happier than he had been; if that was even possible. After everything they had been through, and especially after their latest turmoil, it finally felt like everything was falling into place.

"Yes," John said, smiling wide, and taking Fawnlock's hand in his. "Home."

**~THE END~**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you thank you so much for reading! Again, I apologize it took so long to finish it. I really hope you enjoyed it. Thank you for every single comment and kudo. We really appreciate it.


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